Fubar Blog Posts 3

For The Guys, By A Guy
1. If you like her... ASK HER OUT!!!!!!!! 2. When you hug her, put YOUR ARMS around her WAIST and hold her close. 3. When you WALK next to her, get as CLOSE as you can to her. 4. if she's the only one in your life, TELL HER. 5. ALWAYS let her know how much you like her, love her, or think about her. 6. Give her presents and cards for no reason, SHE WILL RETURN THE FAVOR...ALWAYS. (You don't have to buy us presents) 7. if she hangs up on you, call her right back. 8. Always offer to pay, if she says NO twice, then let her pay but make a deal that you get to pay next time (date offer too!). 9. Kiss her lightly every chance you get. 10. Look in her eyes and kiss her on the lips, forehead, or nose. 11. If she says she's cold, don't be an idiot and say "me too" and stand there, give her your jacket or just simply hold her in your arms. 12. Don't force her to do anything she's not comfortable with. 13. Invite her to dinner or somewhere where you

For Famliy Lounges Clubs
if you need me to create signs banners etc for 1 family 2 lounges 3 clubs 4 if you are some you know that want one hi I"M doing this for friendship alright don't think I"M trying to get in you know or in bed with you alright if you think that way then don't ask me alright it's simple as that (:

Bored
I'm bored!!!! Hahahaha...sounds gay. Yes I'm bored as hell. Anyone into manga or stuff? O well whatever. This is a pointless blog I know. Very stupid motherf***er. Anyhow, I need blood! O and Halloween is coming and I cant get a costume because I have no money...it sux! but I could get a mask. That could work! A mask....

88 Precepts By David Lane
88 PRECEPTS By David Lane (P.O.W) “We must secure the existence of our people and a future for white children. Because the beauty of the White Aryan woman must not perish from the earth.” Before we start I would like to say that until the White race realizes that there is only one source from which we can ascertain lasting truths, there will never be peace or stability on this earth. In the immutable Laws of Nature are the keys to life, order, and understanding. The words of men, even those which some consider “inspired” are subject to the translations, vocabulary, additions, subtractions, and distortions of fallible mortals. Therefore, ever writing or influence, ancient or modern, must be strained through the test of conformity to Natural Law. The White Peoples of the earth must collectively understand that they are equally subject to the iron-hard Laws of Nature with every other creature of the Universe, or they will not secure peace, safety, nor even their existence. The wo

Equality A Crock Of Shit If You Ask Me
If a person where to ask me what my views on equality are, I would have to tell them flatly that equality is not only a fictional notion but it’s also a crock of shit. No one is equal, we are all different and we should all embrace our differences and try not to believe that we can be equal to everyone around us. Equality has been crammed down the throats of the European people since Germany lost the Second World War, we have been forced to believe that our once slaves were equal to us and we are forced to believe that those who flood our borders, unwilling to learn our customs or our languages are equal and have every right to infest our lands. God forbid that a person speaks out against an illegal alien for fear he or she would be considered a racist. We are living in a world where for a white person to survive he or she must denounce any notion of pride or superiority in his or her race, he or she mustn’t ever demand actions taken against a Jew for their crimes committed against

Extortion? Is It Still Illeagl?
Is it just me, or are extortion and bribery still illegal? The only reason I ask this question, is the fact that the Jews in Israel demand all this money from people who have nothing to do with their version of the so called “holocaust”. The Jews have never actually made a name for themselves in a good light at least, for centuries the Jews have complained of this act of oppression or that act of murder, yet they have never look inward as the cause of their problems. It is no wonder that the Jews are despised in every nation, for their acts, it is no wonder why people target them relentlessly and despise the nations who support them. Being an American, I am unable to take pride in my country because of our constant supporting of the stolen state known as Israel. I cannot take pride in my nation because they support a bunch of thieves, murders and liars. I cannot think for even a minute of supporting a nation who bows down to the Jews and caterers to their every whim. America onc

I’ll Wear The Label With Pride
How am I racist when I only follow the teaching of my public education? Why are we the white men women and children forced to live an existence of guilt when we are the sole creators of what is known to be a functioning society? We as a race have more to be proud of then any and all other races combined, it is our people who brought about the technological age, it is our people who built the cities and enforced the laws and it is our people who have made a lasting impression on the world theater. If I am racist for having pride in my heritage and knowing that my people are by far the most advanced in the world then so be it I will wear that label with pride. Neither Jew nor law can ever take the pride I have in my race from me and if this means spending the rest of my short life in a prison cell for speaking my mind then I will gladly go without a fight. It is the right of every white man woman and child to have pride in their race and it is our duty to regain that which has been

It’s Okay To Be White
Being white in modern America is becoming harder and harder as the years drag on. With the over taxation of our people, the laws growing in favor of the non whites who inhabit our country and our people no longer showing a sense of pride in their folk faith and nation we are becoming a dying breed. When I say we, I mean the white men and women who chose to stick to their own kind, the people willing to take on unflattering labels so long as they have breath left in their lungs or fight in their hearts. We are the selected few, who have made it past the Jewish lies, we are the people who are unwilling to watch as our nation is taken away from the people who fought and died on countless occasions so that we may be free. We are the men and women who will not allow our great history to be tarnished, we will fight the bull shit thrown at us and dig deep to get to the actual truth. We are the people who believe that few if any Jews died during the Second World War, we are the people who

Take Action Before It’s Too Late
America was once a great nation to call home, our laws were just, our streets were clean and our government was less corrupt than most. However since the introduction of the Jew into our once glorious society, we have seen a decline in morals and values. Since we allowed the Jew among us we have seen our rights taken away in order to allow the men and women of color a chance at happiness in our nation, we have seen our children’s education take a major hit, with the introduction of the negro and mestizo into white schools and we have seen our nations capital overrun with the worlds most hated tribe of people. In America I though there were anti monopoly laws in place, laws which when followed would not allow a single person or group to control any one medium of business, however we have done nothing to stop the Jews take over of the mass media, we are not going around breaking up their monopolies over the news and entertainment media, we are not smashing their world banking business

Privilege
I have had the privilege of growing up in a nation which bestows upon me freedoms which sadly have been stripped from most if not all European Nations. However in my short 25 years on this American soil, I have seen my people’s rights being trampled upon. With the overcrowding of Jews in our nations capital, an open border policy which allows all countries of color free access to American borders and the law makers passing biased laws to ensure no patriot could take action against their hateful and illegal ways. It saddens me to see my people playing into the hands of our enemies, I watch and see how destructive television has become on my people, I listen to the future leaders of tomorrow and hear them mimicking the lies they are taught in school and I see the women of my race, being what they consider trendy and bedding down with those of other races. Though I still have the right to speak freely, that right is feeling Jewish pressure, I was pretty sure that America was founded o

Together We Can Make A Difference
It saddens me to think how far my country as regressed since the Second World War brought on us by the Jews and their collaborators. Since the Second World War ended, the only country I have ever known has turned into a third world slum, due to the open border policies set in place, the de-segregation of our neighborhoods and schools and the total brainwashing techniques my people have had placed on them. Its no wonder I cannot and should not take any pride in the place where I come from, its no wonder why my people the people of European decent are no longer in control of what they fought and died for on numerous occasions in the past. Since we allowed the Jews to come into our nation, all chaos has broken loose, we have seen the education system failing, we have see a massive increase in the non white population in the last several decades due to the Jewish infiltration of our highest offices, we have seen our children bedding down with people of color and our news and entertainme

Guide Not Force
I’m the type of person who believes that we as adults have the duty in guiding our children down the right path. My views on racial politics aren’t the views of many, however I will try to guide my children down the same path I guided myself down but I will never force them to believe what I believe. I just finished watching a documentary on Lam and Lynx; to those who do not know who these young girls are they make up the band called Prussian Blue. After watching this documentary, it has dawned on me that two beautiful young girls are being held captive by their mother’s views, they are unable to speak freely in their own home all because of their mother and the views she forces down their throats. Like I mentioned before I believe that it is right to express your views to your children, I believe that if a child wants to grow up and become what you are he or she will do so with little coaxing on your part, however if a child shows resistance it is not your job to make their lives

Movie Review: Superman Returns (2006)
Sometimes there are superheroes that surpass time, space and all forms of media. Superman does this in the latest and updated version of his adventures. Plot: Superman/Clark Kent returns after five years of soul searching. He tries to pick up his life in a world that has gone on without him. Oh, Lex Luthor is out to rule the world like always. Likes: Except for Kevin Spacey (Lex) and Kate Bosworth (Lois Lane), the characters are well casted.; There are great action scenes along with slower scenes that develop the main storyline.; The secondary storyline of Lois's kid maybe being a "Superkid" adds a great mystery to the overall film.; There are many tributes to the comic book and previous films. Dislikes: I thought Spacey wasn't evil enough in his playing of Lex. And Bosworth looked too young to be Lois.; There were no connections to Christopher Reeve nor Gene Hackman which could have bridged this film to the others. Rated PG-13 for some intense action violence. Kids Caut

Movie Review: World Trade Center (2006)
The events of Sept. 11, 2001 changed the lives of every person on Earth. Oliver Stone focuses on four of them with an unusually bland style that he normally stays away from. Plot: Sgt. John McLoughlin and Port Authority Officer Will Jimeno become trapped under the collapsed World Trade Center. Meanwhile their wives wait for their rescue. Likes: Oliver Stone well researched the tale of these four individuals, and doesn't spout any conspiracy ideas of who caused the attacks.; The acting is very good by both the major and minor actors.; the film is shot in a very basic style that is void of Stone's usual artsy look. Dislikes: I found it boring at times with scenes that really didn't add anything to the overall storyline.; The violence was very PG-ish. We only see reflections of the horrors. I think the film would have more of an impact if there were more shots of the human cost. Rated PG-13 for intense and emotional content, some disturbing images and language. Kids' Cautio

Movie Review: The Wiz (1978)
1978 saw two great musical films in Grease and The Wiz. Both based on Broadway musicals and were hits in the movie theatres too. Plot: An adult African American Dorothy tries to meet the Wiz so to go home in this modernized, urban version of The Wizard Of Oz. Likes: The songs are great because they memorable.; We see Diana Ross, Michael Jackson, Lena Horne and Richard Pryor in their prime. It just doesn't retell "The Wizard Of Oz" story, but adds the African American experience to the legion.; A good pace with decent action scenes. Dislikes: Character development is rushed so you don't get to fully understand the minor characters like Evillene (a.k.a The Wicked Witch of the West). Rated G. Kid's Caution: The Subway Peddler has some monsters that little kids might get scared by. Prequel/Sequel News: None at this time. Out of four stars, I give it three stars. Great music, but needed to slow down in spots to explore Evillene more.

Movie Review:the Texas Chain Saw Massacre (1974)
On Halloween night, my wife wanted me to watch this "classic" horror film on FUSE. I don't know if I saw an edited or unedited version of the film, but it really doesn't matter. Plot: "Five friends visiting their grandpa's old house are hunted down and terrorized by a chainsaw wielding killer and his family of grave-robbing cannibals." (Source: IMDB.Com) Likes: It is the film that set the ground rules that future horror/slasher films would follow.; It uses little gore and much scary situations to enhance the fear level.; Leatherface, the main killer, shows that terror doesn't need dialogue. Dislikes: A very slow pace that drags on and makes the overall film boring.; The ending was the biggest disappointment of all. There is no final battle to the death nor hero saving the day.; At times, the cinematographer gets a little too creative so to make the film look too artistic at times. Rated R for scary situations and chain saw murders. Kid's Caution: Many fears of death, ske

Movie Review: Mad Love (1935)
On Halloween last year, I got to watch an old horror movie on Turner Classic Movies that would have been considered a psychological thriller by today's standards. Plot: In Paris, a brilliant reconstructive surgeon uses his skills to win the love of an American actress when he is called upon by her to rebuild her husband's hands. Likes: The horror is in idea that we sometimes can't control ourselves when we are either in love or angry.; The actors actual act in that they convince you they really are doctors or pianists.; Being filmed in black-and-white, it is more scary at times. Dislikes: The final battle between the two male leads over the female lead is a let down. It is over before it barely begins. While it wasn't rated in 1935, today it would have been rated probably PG. If Made Today: It would have to have more than one murder victim, be a lot more bloodier and have at least one sex scene. Kid's Caution: While the gore isn't shown, there is a very realistic exec

Movie Review: Cars (2006)
Disney animated movies are known for two main things: teaching lessons of friendship, loyalty and doing your best, and inaccurately discussing historical people and places. But for once, they got this one right. Plot: In a world in which cars are living creatures, Lightning McQueen is the hottest thing on four wheels. But can he learn the importance of friendship on Route 66 in time to win the biggest race of his life? Likes: The story shows accurately how small towns along Route 66 rose and fell with advent of the modern interstate highway system.; The animation and star voices are great.; There good inside jokes about cars, racing and the automotive industry.; The racing scenes are really exciting.; There are a few slow points in the storyline that are used for character development, but they are done sparingly. Dislikes: None Rated G. Kid's Caution: Very small kids may be scared for LMcQ when he gets lost. Prequel/Sequel News: None at this time. Out of four star

Movie Review: X-men: The Last Stand (2006)
In my experience, it is usually the third film in a trilogy that finally gets the characters and storyline right and ready to be wrapped up. This film is no different Plot: When a cure is found to treat mutations, lines are drawn amongst the X-Men, led by Professor Charles Xavier, and the Brotherhood, a band of powerful mutants organized under Xavier's former ally, Magneto. Likes: The cast seemed to really jell together, so their characters act more like an united group.; Special effects were good.; A good steady pace with little diversion into smaller story lines.; The casting of Kelsey Grammar as Dr. Hank "The Beast" McCoy was a great touch of both class and humor to the film. Dislikes: The teenage love triangle between Kitty, Iceman and Rogue was a stupid and useless story element.; Two major characters of the comics is killed off. This totally goes against X-Men canon. Rated PG-13 for intense sequences of action violence, some sexual content and language. (this easily c

Movie Review: The Incredibles (2004)
Superhero movies come and go, but few look at what happens after the cape and mask is retired like this film does. For a kids film, there is much for adults to enjoy too. Plot: After nearly 15 years of forced retirement, a married superhero couple fights to save their family and the world from a super-villain out for revenge. Likes: Great animation.; Seeing how former superheroes adjust to "normal" life and deal with everyday problems makes a very interesting minor storyline.; It was more like watching a cross between a "James Bond" film and True Lies (1994) with a few adult themes and a bad guy who will kill anyone.; Each character is both defined by both his/her superpower and his/her individuality. Dislikes: The baby character of Jack-Jack is barely used. It is only towards the end of the film that we learn of his superpowers. Rated PG for action violence. But also sex and adultry are lightly mentioned. Kids Caution: Nothing really scary. Older kids will pick up on th

Movie Review: The Green Mile (1999)
Based on the series of short stories by Stephen King, it took me three different sittings to see this film completely. And it was worth it. Plot: A possibly wrongly convected death row inmate can bring life back to the dead and dying during his last days in the 1930's. Likes: A great mix of major and minor characters that enrich the overall storyline of life on death row.; Good acting by all actors.; A steady pace that takes time to examine every character and his/her situation.; Only uses flashbacks when needed. Dislikes: It doesn't recognize the racial problems that would exist with a Black inmate on a mostly White death row. So it does have less authenticity . Rated R for violence, language and some sex-related material. There is a very scary death scene of an inmate on the electric chair. Kid's Caution: I have seen both the edited and unedited versions of this film. Neither are for kids because there are situations dealing with child rape and murder, and animal cruel

Movie Review: Poseidon (2006)
1970's disaster movies are revisited in this remake of The Poseidon Adventure (1972) that combined an all-star cast with a life-or-death escape on the high seas. This new version uses a modern all-star cast with a bit more campier storyline. Plot: A modern cruise ship is overturned by a giant wave, and a small group of passengers fight to get out to safety by working together. Likes: Good special effects with explosions and semi-gorie death scenes.; The underwater camera work is great. Used a lot of "Hollywood magic" to keep the overall story going.; The kid character of Conor James provided the best scenes for both laughs and bravery. Dislikes: The acting and dialogue was campy at times by the montley crew of actors.; The writers had a hard time making the individual sub-story lines believable. (For example: Emmy Rossum was too old looking and/or Kurt Russell too young looking to be father and daughter.); It was pretty predictable, but the path they followed wasn't. Rated

Movie Review: Final Destination Iii (2006)
Can we cheat death? What happens when we do? According to this film, Death catches up to you. Plot: A couple of high school kids try to figure out who is die next in a group of students who didn't die when they were supposed to. Likes: Great special effects. A good steady pace that is not predictable. A good triology ending film. Dislikes: The deaths are full of gore that isn't needed. The high school aged characters are played by actors who look barely college-aged. Rated R for strong horror violence/gore, language and some nudity. Kids Caution: Not for kids at all. (The death scenes would even give me nightmares.) Prequel/Sequel News: This film is proceeded by Final Destination (2000) and Final Destination II (2003). Out of four stars, I give it 2 1/2 stars. The effects are great, but it could have used less gore.

Movie Review: Fantastic 4 (2005)
As a kid, I always thought the "Fantastic Four" comic was the best. It showed how friendship and teamwork could united strength, stealth, speed and stretchability into an incredible fighting force. This film does this and more. Plot: Four superpowered researchers unite to battle an evil threat that is determined to destroy them. Likes: A good build-up and back story that shows how accidental normal people become superheroes.; Good special effects for all the stunts and superpowers.; Has a good pace. Dislikes: Has a predictable story line that leads into a sequel.; I think Mr. Fanastic/Dr. Richards could have been better casted with Jeff Goldblum. Rated PG-13 for sequences of intense action, and some suggestive content. Kid's Caution: I found nothing really alarming that a child might be scared by. It was no violent than any cartoon on now. Out of four stars, I give it three stars. I like the build-up to the climax, but the story was predictable.

Movie Review: Angels With Dirty Faces (1938)
Today I would like to review a classic gangster drama that in its own way has a happy ending. I have always found this movie uplifting. Plot: The boyhood friends of Fr. Jerome 'Jerry' Connelly and gangster William 'Rocky' Sullivan meet up again after 15 years apart. While Rocky tries to get back into his mob family, Fr. Jerry tries to save him and a gang of young thugs from a life of crime. In the end, Rocky finds a way to be a good example for his young fans. Likes: The film has two main points. 1. That any of us can have a life of good or bad depending on our choices. 2. No matter what one does in his/her life, they can still redeem him/herself at the end of it.; Great acting by all.; Has scenes of humor and drama that is emphasized by the lighting and cinematography. Dislikes: None Rated PG for violence. Kid's Caution: While a bit gritty, it is a good lesson for older kids about how life can be tough. This classic movie gets 4 stars. It is worth renting or watching

Movie Review: The Forgotten (2004)
A grieving parent's nightmare comes true in this suspense movie. Plot: A mother is the only one remembering a dead child that everyone has forgotten. Likes: A good use of a slower pace to tell the story.; The movie is filmed a very dark scenery to give a nightmare appearance.; Some good acting all around by everyone.; A good storyline. It is like a two-hour "X-Files" episode but without Mulder and Scully. Dislikes: The film is so dark that it is hard to see the details at times.; Not really a scary movie to watch. Rated PG-13 for intense thematic material, some violence and brief language. Kid's Caution: Not really scary nor lots of bad language.; Kids might find it boring to watch. (It put my wife to sleep three times.) I give it 2 1/2 stars. It has a good story if you can stay awake to see it all.

Movie Review: Cellular (2004)
The cell phone has come to age in our society as it stars in this thriller. Plot: A young man tries to save a family from some dirty cops after receiving a cell phone call. Likes: A nice commentary on good and bad aspects that cell phones bring to modern life.; A good pace with enough set-up, action and dialogue to keep the story moving.; Decent acting that made the characters come across very realistically. Dislikes: Some parts are just one long chase scene that could have been shorten some. Rated PG-13 for violence, terror situations, language and some sexual references. Kid's Caution: There is a lot of bad language in it, but the violence is about average and the sexual references are only jokes. I give it 3 stars. It is one of the better action thrillers that I have seen. It just needed to have one less car chase to make it better.

Movie Review: Fear Dot Com (2002)
Horror hits the cyber age in this internet thriller. Plot: A city health inspector and a detective look into the deaths of various people who have died after logging in on a reality website. Likes: The cinematography was interesting to watch.; Had a solid ending. Dislikes: Not very original since it seemed like a "The Ring" (2002) rip-off. Rated R for nudity, language and scenes of torture. Kid's Caution: Not for Children. I gave it 2 stars. Liked the cinematography, but could have been more original.

Movie Review: Transformers-the Movie (1986)
They're more than meets the eye. Plot: "The Autobots must stop a colossal planet consuming robot who is after the Autobot Matrix of Leadership. (IMDB.Com) Likes: A great mix of combat scenes, dialogue and music that drives the story along at a good pace. Dislikes: The animation is ok for a feature film.; Having Optimus Prime killed off. Rated PG for mild language and tons of space violence. Kid's Caution: Very violent; Shows favorite characters being killed off quickly. I give it 3 1/2 stars. Good film, but could have had better animation.

Help Me Plz
hey im haveing a contest to reach 10k in comments its slow but im getting there i dont ask for help but if u could that be great if u want to help me go to my profile comments page click on my sons pic and help me out leave as many as u like any would help ty so much ur friend bud

A Real Man
** A real man gets in your heart, not in your face. ** A real man takes time to listen. He values communication and respects the needs of others. ** A real man sets priorities. ** A real man researches all his options, lists his choices and thinks before making a decision. ** A real man never makes decisions when his emotions are not under control. He would rather wait three days than risk overreacting. ** A real man uses logic, compromise, and negotiation to solve problems. ** A real man chooses his fights and knows the facts before he takes a stand. ** A real man uses motivation rather than intimidation. ** A real man doesn't offer excuses or blame others for his choices. ** A real man knows that not everything in life is a crisis. ** A real man doesn't need to raise his voice or upgrade his personality when company is around. He is consistent. ** A real man doesn't brag. Time reveals what matters. ** A real man accepts the challenges of being vulnerable and i

A Few Ways To Serve A Master
1) Striving to be the reflection of his expectations and conducting myself accordingly in every facet of my life. Always try to bring him honor, joy and pleasure with each day to the best of my ability, never forgetting that my submission is a service of love and not some casual play, but a dedicated way of life we both choose to freely live within the framework of a deeply committed loving relationship. 2) Holding and nurturing the mutual trust that underpins our successful lifestyle relationship. Never giving cause for him to distrust or doubt my words, actions or feelings and always expressing myself forthright, openly, honestly or respectfully so that he may fully understand me. Also, by expecting the same level of honesty so that I can fully understand and meet his expectations or needs. 3) Constantly working to protect and increase the value of the gifts I offer to him. Making sure I take very good care of myself. Continue my studies in all areas of life including my emotio

A Slave's Plea To Her Master
Think of me, Master... know that I live... hear my heart beating... listen for my soul's voice... Hear me, Master.... my voice, my heart, my soul... listen for needs spoken and silent... that are sometimes so hard to express... Share with me, Master... Your happiness, Your excitement, Your goals... allow me to bask in Your delight... permit me to see Your tranquility... Confide in me, Master... Your pain, Your fears, Your disappointments... allow me to lend You my support... permit me to try and relieve Your burdens... Teach me, Master... Your desires, Your needs, Your dreams... let me make them real for You... as You have so often done for me... Respect me, Master... treat me as a cherished toy... make me Your favored pet... show me how much You value my gift... Feel me, Master... standing near like a wraith... tangible to Your senses.... beside You as You go through Your day... Hold me, Master... in arms that are my safety and shield... wra

Movie Review: Robin Hood-prince Of Thieves (1991)
An old English tale is revisited with this adaptation of the adventures of Robin Hood. Plot: "When Robin and his Moorish companion come to England and the tyranny of the Sheriff of Nottingham, he decides to fight back as an outlaw." (IMDB.Com) Likes: A good historical look at Medieval England during the time of King Richard I.; The action scenes have good stunts and effects.; The movie has a steady pace. Dislikes: It seems like a long movie when watching it. Rated PG-13 for violence, language and brief nudity. Kid's Caution: Some of the violence is intense for small kids. I give it 2 1/2 stars. A really long quasi historical piece.

Movie Review: The Prince Of Egypt (1998)
Here the Holy Bible meets Hollywood in this animated biblical tale. Plot: Moses goes from being a spoiled royal prince to being the leader of the Hebrew people. Likes: Has a good mix of songs, story development and action scenes to keep the film going at a steady pace.; Shows the different points of view of how God delivers the Hebrews out of Egypt. Dislikes: None: Rated PG for a few scary moments and references to mass murder. Kid's Caution: Should be watched with an adult so child can be told the difference between which parts of the film are historically accurate and which are fictional. I give it 4 stars. A great film to see during Passover.

Movie Review: Independence Day (1996)
I first saw this film the theatre in 1996, and I loved it. As soon as I got it on video, I showed it to my kids. Plot: The US organizes a counterattack after some nasty aliens start invading Earth. Likes: A good mix, of character development, action scenes, humor and aliens to carry the film along.; Tons of hidden jokes that refer to other Sci-Fi tv shows and movies. Dislikes: Seems a bit long at 145 minutes. Rated PG-13 for scary moments, violence and language. Kid's Caution: About the same level of violence and monsters as the Star Wars films. I give it 3 stars. Great action scenes even if it is a little long.

Movie Review: A Bug's Life (1998)
Take one part "The Ant and the Grasshopper" and one part "The Magnificent Seven"(1960), and you get "A Bug's Life". Plot: Flik tries to save his art colony from some mean grasshoppers by recruiting a team of "warrior bugs" to help him. Likes: The Pixar guys outdone themselves. Everything looks very 3-D and realistic.; The characters are well developed.; The storyline has a good pace. Dislikes: None Rated G Kids Caution: Hopper may come off as scary to small kids. I give it 3 stars. A good family movie that both adults and kids will enjoy.

Movie Review-titanic (1997)
This is my wife's favorite movie. So when it came out in a special collector's edition, she had to get it. This is the 1997 version, but with an alternative ending put into the special features. Plot: Jack and Rose are star-crossed lovers who only meet once, but share a lifetime of adventure as they live through the sinking of the RMS Titanic. Likes: The film is shot beautifully. You get a good idea of how large and fancy the ship was.; The story is told at a good pace with just enough slow and fact-paced scenes.; Characters are well developed.; A good view of how society was in 1912. Dislikes: Very long at 194 minutes.; Doesn't explain Rose's life after Jack too much. Rating: PG-13 for violence and sexuality. Parent's Guide: A good historical film for children 12 and up. Prequel/Sequel Information: None Out of 4 Stars....3 Stars. Good story but very long running time.

Movie Review: The Amityville Horror (2005)
In movies, a "remake" is a film that is a new version of an original film. It may be made to update the film, modernize it or pay tribute to the original. The Amityville Horror 2005 is a remake of the 1979 original film with the same name. Does it hold up? Plot: The Lutz family spends 28 days being spooked by version ghosts until madness drives then out. Likes: It has a good pace full of spooky moments.; The family back story is well developed.; Gore is used for dramatic effect and not overdone.; It does pay tribute to the highlights of the 1979 version.; The set design, cars and costumes looked liked the early 1970's. Dislikes: The family dog getting axed to death wasn't needed.; The Rev. Ketchum torture ending was a bit of a stretch.; More of suspense film than a horror film. Rated R for language, violence, sexuality and drug use. Parental Guide: Not for kids under 16 for sure. Out of 4 Stars: 3 Stars since it is a good suspense movie, but not really a horror fil

Movie Review: "anchorman: The Legend Of Ron Burgundy" (2004)
"A:LRB" is a cute movie with some funny scenes for a period piece. Plot: "Ron Burgundy is San Diego's top rated newsman in the male dominated broadcasting of the 1970's, but that's all about to change when a new female employee with ambition to burn arrives in his office." (source: IMDB.Com) Good Points: The writing and costume/set design captures the look of the 1970s really well.; There are some very funny scenes. I especially liked the street fight scene with all the local tv news reporters.; The various sub-story lines and characters fleshed out the film. Bad Points: The jokes were pretty far apart.; Applegate has began to let her age show to the point that I barely recognized her. Rated PG-13 for mild violence and language. Parental Guide: If you will let your kids watch any Austin Powers film, then let them see this. Prequel/Sequel News: None as far as I know. Out of 4 Stars...2 1/2 Stars.; Good jokes, but spread too thinly throughout the film.

Movie Review-"i, Robot" (2004)
If you took C-3PO from "Star Wars" and combine him with the original Terminator robot from the "Terminator" series, then you get "I, Robot". Plot: In 2035, robots are now man's best friend. But one cop is out to prove that they can commit murder. Good Points: It has a good mystery that takes its time to develop as the characters slowly explain themselves.; It has a good mix of dialogue, fight scenes, chase scenes, character development and realistic special effects.; The setting is futuristic but not so much that you can't relate to it.; Will Smith doesn't try to make the film too funny. In fact I think it was his best action film so far. Bad Points: Smith's character is a little too easy to figure out.; There was a lot of product placement although the film. The first 15 minutes was just one big commercial for Audi cars and Fed-Ex. Rated PG-13 for violence and language. Parent's Guide: The robots can be down right mean at times, so this may scare kids.; It has a girl dy

Movie Review-"batman Beyond-return Of The Joker" (2000)
A few days ago I got to caught "Batman Beyond-Return of the Joker" in HBO Family. Plot: "In this action-packed adventure, the sleeker, more dangerous and seemingly immortal Clown Prince of Crime is back to terrorize Gotham, Batman and the aging Bruce Wayne." (Source-IMDB.Com) This is just the tip of the iceberg. There is a real mystery involving all the main Batman characters and their pasts. Good Points: A lot of unanswered questions about the times between "Batman-The Animated Series" and "Batman Beyond" are cleared up.; The whole bat-gang is reunited to officially pass the torch onto the new Batman.; A good solid storyline that doesn't pull any punches.; Has both a twist at the end and a happy ending. Bad Points: It totally got rid of the Joker for once and for all.; No Nightwing (aka Dick Grayson, Robin I) Rated PG-13 for lots of violence, and the near showing of death by electrocution. Parental Guide: Very intense for young viewers for its dark storyline. Out of

Movie Review: "kill Bill-volume I" (2003)
When I was in college, I had a friend who was big into off-the-wall movies and animation. He had me sit through two Quentin Tarantino movies, "Reservoir Dogs" (1992) and "Natural Born Killers" (1994). Along with "Pulp Fiction" (1994), I found his storytelling style very original. But last night I viewed his best work yet: "Kill Bill-Vol. I" (2003). Plot: "A female assassin attacked on her wedding day and left for dead by her group leader/ex-lover, Bill, wakes up four years later from a coma and seeks revenge against him and his team of murderous assasins." (Source-IMDb) Good Points: A great balance of humor, gore, violence, fight scenes and dialogue that keeps the story going at a steady pace. QT uses a good balance of flashbacks and camera tricks to tell the back story of the main characters. He even used great graphic comics-style of animation to explain the rise of O-Ren Ishii, an underworld ruler. My favorite character was Gogo Yubari, a 17 year old bodyguard who is as mad

Movie Review-"racing Stripes" (2005)
Being that today is when my wife and I are throwing a birthday party for our two youngest kids, I thought it would be nice to let them see a kiddie movie on pay-per-view. So we watched "Racing Stripes" (2005). Plot: "An abandoned zebra grows up believing he is a racehorse, and, with the help of his barnyard friends and a teenage girl, sets out to achieve his dream of racing with thoroughbreds." (Source: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0376105/) It is basically a "SeaBiscuit" (2003) for kids. Good Points: Your classic fish-out-of-water good guy makes it big for believing in himself. Always a good moral for kids. There were some great animal-character voices done by a lot of current movie stars. It had a good mix of serious subplots and funny moments. Bad Points: It shows kids how some people in the racing world are all about money and winning. It even shows that some jockies will cheat to will. Snoop Dog, as the voice of Lightning the Hound Dog, was completely useless and added not

Movie Review-"the Mangler" (1995)
Sometimes 19th century real-life terrors become 20th century horror film story lines. The is true with The Mangler. Plot: An over sized laundry machine begins to eat up workers. A cop investigates, and finds it to be a tool of Satan. Good Points: Robert Englund (AKA Freddy) and Ted Levine (the Police Captain on "Monk") give pretty good performances as a evil laundry owner and policeman. The demon-machine is very scary looking as a machine, and kills by folding up a body. It is almost like a full-length movie version of an episode of the tv show "The Dark Side" since it has a twist at the end. Bad Points: Once the demon-machine becomes more demonish, it is all animated and poorly at that. The story was story in places. Parent's Guide: It is Rated R for gore, violence and language. My youngest daughter came in and got scared by the demon-machine pressing a woman to death. Out of 4 Stars....I give it 2 1/2 Stars. Interesting enough to kill a couple of hours, but the scares

Movie Review: "spirit-stallion Of The Cimarron" (2002)
This was the first time I have seen "Spirit-Stallion Of The Cimarron" all the way through. I once saw it about a month ago at my son's school, but I didn't get to see the ending. Storyline: Spirit is a stallion who goes through various adventures to earn freedom for Little Tree, a young Indian brave, and himself. Along the way, they fight the US Cavalry and railroad workers. Likes: A good combination of both 2-D and 3-D animation throughout the film. The story is told from Spirit's point of view with very little dialogue and/or voice-overs. Both the US Cavalry and Indian tribe are shown realistically not as cruel horse beaters as much as two groups trying to use horses to survive. The music is a combination of songs by Bryan Adams and pieces by Hans Zimmer. Dislikes: I am not a fan of story lines set in the Old West. Generally that part of US history is boring to me. But I realize there would be no story without this setting. Parental Concerns: Some violence, but nothing wo

Movie Review: "garfield-the Movie" (2004)
Growing up I used to read the "Garfield" comic strip and books when I had the chance to. Hearing that it was to be a movie, I thought it might be cool if it was done well. When I finally saw it, I found it ok. Plot: Garfield learns to like having Odie around as they have a quick adventure together in Central City. Good Points: Bill Murry is great as Garfield's voice. BM really captures G's attitude. G. is treated like a real cat by the human characters, not a talking cat like in the comic strip. The human actors Breckin Meyer (Jon) and Jennifer Love Hewitt (Liz) actually were pretty good. Bad Points: G. is animated while Odie and G's animal pals are played by real animals. I think an animated Odie would have been cool too. Also Odie is supposed to be a dumb dog, but in the movie he is a pretty bright. The side-story of Jon chasing after Liz was hokey and didn't really fit into the movie well. My kids thought it was ok. They liked how "Garfield-The Movie" (2004) used so many

Perfect Doll
First off, to explain this; these are the thoughts of a slave girl. She wants to be his slave so much, but he doesnt see it. And she feels embarassed to tell her perspective Master. "I will be your perfect doll. Your perfect little doll. Obedient, quiet, faithful. It will all be yours. The things you don't see are the things i want you to have... I want to be your perfect little slave. Always quiet, never quarrel, speak only when spoken to... I will be that for you. If i will show you... It would hurt you to do the things i crave... I want these things for you. I will give these things to you. I want you not to hurt to punish me when i dont do the things you want of me. I want spanked, shackled, and sometimes used. But only to end in knowing that you do these things for me. Because I love you. And you love me. I want to wear your shackles. Your collar. I want to wear your welts on my back from our sex. I will wear them with pride... I want to be your Perfect

New Dream
Lay your head down And sleep on my shoulder Lay your head down And start a new dream And for tonight the moment is over Drift in a lullaby Here where the stars reside And angels are always seen Lay your head down The stars they have whispered Hear what they say And know that it means The moon is your guide The stars they have kissed her As she goes gently by Light as a baby's sigh Safe on a fairytale stream And start a new dream

The Last Breath
Running for her life The dark rain from her eyes still falls Breathtaking butterfly Chose a dark day to live Save one breath for me Alone and longing for The cadence of her last breath Why do I miss someone I never met? With bated breath I lay Sea winds brought her to me A butterfly, mere one-day Miracle of life And all the poetry in the world Finally makes sense to me Save one death for me A Loner longing for Run away, run away, run away, run away The cadence of her last breath Put to rest, all that's not life Drink for beauty Feel her last breath Sometimes a dream turns into greed Alone and longing for Run away, run away, run away, run away The cadence of her last breath A Loner longing for Run away, run away, run away, run away The cadence of her last breath

Getting To Know Me
1. What time did you get up this morning? 7:00 am 2. Diamonds or pearl? diamonds 3. What was the last film you saw at the cinema? can`t remember 4. What's your favorite TV show? CSI 5. What did you have for breakfast this morning? egg muffen 6. What's your favorite cuisine? anything 7. What foods do you dislike? none as of right now 8. What is your favorite crisp(CHIP) flavor? plain 9. What's your favorite CD at the moment? unsure 10. What kind of car do you drive? pontiac 11. Favorite sandwich? ham and cheese 12. Are you pregnant? YES

He Made My Day
Most Amazing man . I know , I have been sick . He calls me everyday .Make sure I am ok , Yesterday he stop by .Made me so happy . Cheer me up sooooooooooo much . Just see him . Makes me happy. When I am with him . Like nothing else matters . He listens great !! Always cheers me up ! He has a great sense humor . Great Father too he's kids . Very very hard worker . That man put he's all into what he dose . Honey you are Awesome !! xoxoxoxoxox

Pointless Friends
If you're reading this then I have decided to keep you. Today I went through and deleted all but a few, and yes I mean a few, friends. I was tired of people who are point whores and only worry about their status on here. It says a lot about a person. Fake ass people is what I prefer to call them. I kept you because I consider you a friend. We have talked or just met and have just started talking. If you don't like me, delete me. I am not here for points. I just use this place to make friends because I do not have a lot of time to meet new people and I am shy. Now you know why I have been single for almost five years. Anyway, feel free to let me know how you feel about this. Hopefully all of you will stay my friend and we can continue to get to know each other better. Until next time, take care of yourself and others!!! Rian

Pumpkin Fudge (fall Recipe)
PUMPKIN FUDGE 3 cups sugar 1 cup milk 3 tbsp light corn syrup 1/2 cup mashed cooked pumpkin 1/4 tsp salt 1 tsp pumpkin pie spice 1 1/2 tsp vanilla 1/2 cup butter 1/2 cup chopped nuts, optional In a 3 quart saucepan, mix together sugar, milk, corn syrup, pumpkin and salt; bring to boil over high heat stirring constantly. Reduce heat to medium and continue boiling. But do not stir. When mixture registers 232 degrees on candy thermometer (or forms a soft ball when dropped into cold water), remove pan from heat. Stir in pumpkin pie spice, vanilla, butter and nuts. Cool to lukewarm (110 degreees on candy thermometer). Then beat mixture until very thick and it loses some of its gloss. Quickly pour into a greased 8 inch pan. When firm, cut into about 36 squares.

Pizza Roll Ups
INGREDIENTS 1/2 pound ground beef 1 (8 ounce) can tomato sauce 1/2 cup shredded mozzarella cheese 1/2 teaspoon dried oregano 2 (8 ounce) cans refrigerated crescent rolls DIRECTIONS In a skillet, cook beef over medium heat until no longer pink; drain. Remove from the heat. Add tomato sauce, mozzarella cheese and oregano; mix well. Separate crescent dough into eight rectangles, pinching seams together. Place about 3 tablespoons of meat mixture along one long side of each rectangle. Roll up, jelly-roll style, starting with a long side. Cut each roll into three pieces. Place, seam side down, 2 in. apart on greased baking sheets. Bake at 375 degrees for 15 minutes or until golden brown.

Cran Apple Spiced Cider (fall Recipe)
INGREDIENTS 8 cups Apple Cider 1 apple 1/2 cup whole cloves 1 cup fresh or frozen cranberries 1 medium orange, peeled and sectioned 1 cinnamon stick DIRECTIONS: Using a slow cooker, pour in apple cider, add cranberries, orange pieces, and the cinnamon stick. Poke the whole cloves into the apple, all around it then drop it also into the cider. Slow cook for 2 hours. The longer it sits with the spice, the stronger it gets. Strain the fruit and spices out with slotted spoon before serving if desired.

Cherry Breeze
1 - 8oz package cream cheese 1 can eagle's brand milk (*sweetened condensed) 1/2 cup real lemon juice 1 T. vanilla 1 cookie crust (prepared) cherry pie filling (or pie filling of your choice) in large mixing bowl, whip cream cheese by itself. Add condensed milk and blend until smooth. add lemon and stir with a a spoon (or else it splashes) then add vanilla and stir again. pour into crust and refrigerate at least 2 hours. top with pie filling, or can be eaten plain. Very easy and yummy.

Pina Colada Cake
This cake is awesome!! Pina Colada Cake 1 pkg yellow cake mix 1 cup pina colada drink mix 1 can sweetened condensed milk (Eagle Brand) 1 carton cool whip Bake cake as per instructions on the box. While still hot, poke holes in cake with a meat fork and drip drink mix and then condensed milk on cake. Allow cake to cool and set for 1 hour. Top with Cool Whip

Hooter's Buffalo Wings
Hooters Buffalo Chicken Wings Vegetable oil (for frying ) 1/4 cup butter 1/3 cup Crystal Louisiana Hot Sauce 1/4 teaspoon ground pepper 1/2 teaspoon garlic powder 1/2 cup all-purpose flour 1/4 teaspoon paprika 1/3 teaspoon cayenne pepper 1/4 teaspoon salt 10 chicken wing pieces On the side Bleu cheese dressing Celery sticks Heat oil in a deep fryer to 375 degrees F. You want just enough oil to cover the wings entirely - an inch or so deep at least. Combine the butter, hot sauce, ground pepper and garlic powder in a small saucepan over low heat. Heat until the butter is melted and the ingredients well-blended. Combine the flour, paprika, cayenne pepper and salt in a small bowl. If the wings are frozen, be sure to defrost and dry them. Put the wings into a large bowl and sprinkle the flour mixture over them, coating each wing evenly. Put the wings in the refrigerator for 60 to 90 minutes. (This will help the breading to stick to the wings when fried.) Put

Grilled Shrimp Salad
Grilled Shrimp Salad Ingredients 1/2 cup italian dressing 1/2 cup lime or lemon juice 1 lb. medium shrimp cleaned, grilled 2 medium red peppers, chopped 1 medium onion, finely chopped 1 celery stalk, chopped 1 Tbsp. chopped cilantro 1 lb. romaine lettuce, torn Procedure: Pour dressing and lime juice over shrimp in large bowl; toss to coat. Add all remaining ingredients except lettuce; mix lightly. Cover. Refrigerate about an hour. Put lettuce on serving plate; top with the shrimp mixture.

Peanut Chicken Skewers
INGREDIENTS 1/2 cup creamy peanut butter 1/2 cup water 1/4 cup soy sauce 4 cloves garlic, minced 3 tablespoons lemon juice 2 tablespoons brown sugar 3/4 teaspoon ground ginger 1/2 teaspoon crushed red pepper flakes 4 boneless, skinless chicken breast halves 2 cups shredded red cabbage Sliced green onion tops DIRECTIONS In a saucepan, combine the first eight ingredients; cook and stir over medium-high heat for 5 minutes or until smooth. Reserve half of the sauce. Slice chicken lengthwise into 1-in. strips; thread onto metal or soaked wooden skewers. Grill, uncovered, over medium-hot heat for 2 minutes; turn and brush with peanut butter sauce. Continue turning and basting for 4-6 minutes or until juices run clear. Place cabbage on a serving plate; top with chicken. Sprinkle with onion tops. Serve with reserved sauce.

Roasted Garlic
Roasted garlic can be prepared easily at home. The store-bought varieties tend to have lost a lot of their flavor by the time they are purchased. Pre-heat your oven to 400. Loosely wrap whole garlic bulbs (skin on), a little olive oil, a dash of salt and a few grinds of fresh pepper in aluminum foil. Place on a cookie sheet and bake for 45 minutes. Cool slightly and squeeze the garlic from its skin. Place in a covered container and refrigerate until needed.

Chuck Wagon Stew
Chuckwagon Stew 2 1/2 lb Beef cubes (5 cups) 2 Tb Flour 1 Tb Paprika 1 tsp Chili powder 2 tsp Salt 3 Tb vegetable shortening 2 Sliced onions 1 Clove garlic - minced 28 oz Can of tomatoes 3 Tb Chili powder 1 Tb Cinnamon 1 tsp Ground cloves 1/2 tsp Dried & crushed red peppers 2 cup Chopped potatoes 2 cup Chopped carrots Coat beef in a mixture of flour, paprika,1 tsp. chili powder and salt. Brown the beef in hot shortening in a large Dutch oven. Add onion and garlic and cook until soft. Add canned tomatoes, chili powder, cinnamon, cloves and peppers. Cover and simmer for 2 hours. Then, add the potatoes and carrots and cook until vegetables are done (usually about 45 minutes). Serves 6 hungry cowpokes.

Son Of A Gun Stew
Son-of-a-Gun-Stew Meat: 3 pounds chuck or other inexpensive beef roast 2 pounds pork roast or boneless pork ribs 2 bay leaves, broken in half 1 teaspoon dried parsley 2 cloves garlic, chopped 1 tablespoon dried, minced onion flakes 1 tablespoon Worcestershire sauce 1 tablespoon instant beef stock or 1 can beef broth Water Vegetables: 2 tablespoons olive oil 1 medium yellow onion, chopped 1 green or red bell pepper, seeded and chopped 2 large carrots, chopped into small bite-size pieces 4 medium potatoes, peeled, cooked and cut into eighths 2 tablespoons butter 2 tablespoons all-purpose flour Juice from the cooked meat. Cut the meat into chunks small enough to fit in your crockpot. Place the bay leaves, parsley, garlic, onion flakes and Worcestershire on top of the meat. Mix the instant beef stock with a cup of hot water and pour over the meat, or use the beef broth and pour over the meat. Add enough water to cover the meat, cover and cook on high for 1

Skillet Coconut Chicken
Ingredients 6 medium skinless, boneless chicken breast halves 1/2 tsp. salt 1/2 tsp. ground black pepper 2 Tbsp. butter 1 14-oz. can unsweetened coconut milk 1/3 cup cold water 1 Tbsp. cornstarch 1/2 cup coarsely chopped almonds 1/2 cup snipped dried apricots 1 tsp. finely shredded lemon peel 2 Tbsp. lemon juice 1/4 tsp. salt 1/8 tsp. cayenne pepper 3 cups hot cooked rice 1/3 cup golden raisins 2 green onions, thinly bias sliced Directions1. Sprinkle chicken with the 1-1/2 teaspoon salt and black pepper. 2. In a large skillet cook chicken, half at a time, in hot butter over medium heat for 12 to 15 minutes or until chicken is no longer pink, turning once. Remove chicken from skillet; cover and keep warm. 3. For sauce, add coconut milk to skillet, stirring to scrape up any browned bits. Bring to a simmer. In a small bowl combine water and cornstarch. Add to skillet, stirring constantly. Cook and stir until thickened. Stir in almonds, apricots, lemon

Taco Squares
TACO SQUARES 1 1/2 lbs. ground beef 1 c. sour cream 2/3 c. mayonnaise 1 c. shredded sharp cheddar cheese 2 tbsp. chopped onion 2 c. Bisquick 1/2 c. cold water 1 to 2 med. sliced tomatoes 1/2 c. chopped green peppers Heat oven to 375 degrees. Grease 13 x 9 x 2 baking dish. Cook beef until brown, drain. Mix sour cream, mayonnaise, cheese and onion. Mix bisquick and water, pat in pan pressing 1/2 inch up sides of baking dish. Layer beef, tomatoes and pepper. Spoon cheese mixture on top. Bake about 30 minutes. I have substituted 1/2 cottage cheese, 1/2 light sour cream instead of all sour cream has worked very well.

Aunt B's Fruit Salad
Aunt B's Fruit Salad 20 oz. can pineapple chunks drained 16 oz. can peach slices drained 11 oz. can mandarin oranges drained 3 medium bananas 2 medium apples cored and chopped 3 3/4 or 3 5/8 oz. pkg. instant vanilla pudding 1 1/2 C. milk 3 oz. frozen concentrate orange juice thawed 3/4 C. sour cream Combine fruits. Set aside in refrigerator. In small bowl, combine pudding, milk and orange juice. Beat until blended. Beat in sour cream. Fold in fruit mixture, cover and chill. Garnish with mandarin orange sections.

Grilled Mint Salmon
Grilled Mint Salmon Salmon Fillets Lemon Juice Minced Onion Butter Fresh Mint Aluminum Pan Melt butter and add lemon & onion. SautÃ© until onions are almost clear. Pour small amount in the bottom of the aluminum pan. Place fillet in pan and pour remaining mixture on top. Sprinkle with fresh mint. Grill on medium heat until poached consistency.

Firecracker Salmon
Firecracker Grilled Alaska Salmon 4 (4 to 6 oz. each) Alaska Salmon steaks or fillets, thawed if necessary Â¼ cup peanut oil 2 tbsp. soy sauce 2 tbsp. balsamic vinegar 2 tbsp. chopped green onions 1 1/2 tsp. brown sugar 1 clove garlic, minced Â¾ tsp. grated ginger Â½ tsp. red chili flakes (or more to taste) Â½ tsp. sesame oil 1/8 salt Place salmon steaks or fillets in a glass dish. Whisk together remaining ingredients and pour over salmon. Cover with plastic wrap and marinate in refrigerator 4-6 hours. Remove salmon from marinade and place on a well-oiled grill 5 inches from coals. Grill for 10 minutes per inch of thickness, measured at the thickest part, or until fish just flakes when tested with a fork. Turn halfway through cooking. Makes 4 servings.

Horsey Salmon
Horsey Salmon 6 Salmon Fillets 2 tablespoons prepared Horseradish 1 medium Onion (chopped) 3 tablespoons Balsamic Vinegar 2 tablespoons Olive Oil 1 teaspoon Rosemary (chopped) 1 clove Garlic (chopped) Â¼ teaspoon salt 1/8 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper Olive Oil spray In a blender or food processor, puree Horseradish, Onion, Balsamic vinegar, Oil, Rosemary, and Garlic. Add Salt and Pepper; blend. Place each Salmon fillet in center of a piece of heavy-duty aluminum foil sprayed with Olive Oil, spoon 2 tablespoons Horseradish mixture over each Fillet. Bring up edges of each piece of foil and seal, leaving an opening for steam to escape. Place foil packets in center of cooking grate. Grill 6-10 minutes until fish flakes easily with a fork.

Cheese Grilled Ling Cod
Cheese Grilled Ling Cod Ingredients 4 fish steaks or fillets (1 1/2 lb) 1/2 small onion, skinned and grated 4 oz of cheese, grated 2 oz. butter 1 tsp dry mustard salt and pepper 2 tomatoes, sliced 1. Wash, wipe and trim the fish steaks and remove the centre bones with a sharp-pointed knife. 2. Mix the remaining ingredients (except the tomatoes) until well blended. 3. Place the steaks on the grill rack and grill under a medium heat for about 5 minutes, turn them and grill for another 3 minutes. 4. Spread the cheese mixture over the fish and lay 1 or 2 slices of tomato on each steak. 5. Grill for a final 3-5 minutes, until the cheese topping is golden and the tomatoes are cooked.

Dutch Oven Salmon (camp Recipe)
Dutch Oven Salmon 1-2 Salmon Filletsâ€™ (this should be judged from number of people eating) Black Pepper Garlic Powder 1 Lemon (fresh) 4-6 Fresh Mushrooms 4-6 Green Onions 4-8 oz Creamed cheese Leave skin on the salmon fillet. Slice fillets into wide strips. Place salmon strips, skin side down, into the bottom of a 12â€ Dutch Oven. Sprinkle on black pepper to your taste. Sprinkle on garlic powder to your taste. Cut fresh lemon into quarters and squeeze over salmon strips. Slice fresh mushrooms into thin slices and spread over salmon strips and onto bottom of oven. Slice fresh green onions into thin slices and spread over salmon and onto bottom of oven. Drop small chunks of creamed cheese onto salmon strips. Top with lemon slices. Cover Dutch Oven and cook for 15-20 minutes.

Watermelon Jam
Watermelon Jam 3 cups granulated sugar 1 1/2 cups finely chopped seeded watermelon (do not puree) 1/4 cup lemon juice 1 package (1.75 ounces) powered fruit pectin 3/4 cup water In large bowl, stir together sugar, watermelon and lemon juice. Set aside for 10 minutes, stirring occasionally. In small saucepan, blend fruit pectin and water. Bring mixture to boil over high heat; boil, stirring, for 1 minute. Stir pectin mixture into watermelon mixture. Stir constantly until sugar is dissolved, about 3 minutes. Quickly pour into jars and cover. Let stand at room temperature 24 hours to set. Store jam in refrigerator for up to 3 weeks. Makes about 4 cups.

Double Lemon Bars
Double Lemon Bars 1 cup (2 sticks) unsalted butter, room temperature 2/3 cup powdered sugar 2 1/4 cups flour 2 cups sugar 4 large eggs 7 tbsp fresh lemon juice with pulp 1/4 cup finely grated lemon peel (peel from about 6 large peels) 1 tsp baking powder Preheat oven to 350 F. Using electric mixer, beat the butter in a large bowl until fluffy. Beat in 2/3 cup powdered sugar. Add two cups flour, 1 cup at a time, beating until moist clumps form. Using the back of a fork, press dough over the bottom of a nonstick 13 x 9 inch metal baking dish. Bake crust until light golden, about 20 minutes. Meanwhile, beat two cups sugar and the eggs in a medium bowl until blended. Beat in the fresh lemon juice with the pulp, the lemon peel, and the baking powder. Beat in the remaining 1/4 cup all purpose flour for the filling. Pour the lemon filling over the hot crust. Bake until the filling is set in the center and begins to brown on the top, about 20 minutes. Transfer the pan to

Chocolate Kahlua Cake
Chocolate Kahlua Cake 1 (18.25 oz.) box devil's food cake mix 1 small (1 oz.) box sugar-free instant chocolate pudding mix 1 cup nonfat vanilla yogurt 1/4 cup vegetable oil 1/3 cup skim milk 1 large egg 3 large egg whites 1/3 cup KahlÃºa liqueur 1/3 cup semisweet chocolate chips Cocoa Preheat oven to 350ÂºF. Coat a 13 x 9-inch baking pan with nonstick cooking spray and dust with cocoa. Place all ingredients except chocolate chips in a large bowl. Beat with mixer for 2 minutes or until well blended. Stir in chocolate chips. Pour batter into prepared pan and bake for 50 minutes, or until a wooden pick inserted in middle comes out clean. Cool before cutting.

Breakfast Rounds
Breakfast Rounds 1/2 cup peanut butter 4 English muffins, split and toasted 1 red apple, cored and sliced 1/4 cup packed brown sugar 2 tablespoons margarine 1/4 teaspoon ground cinnamon Spread 1 tablespoon of peanut butter onto each English muffin half. Top each one with a few apple slices. In the microwave, melt together the brown sugar, margarine and cinnamon, stirring frequently until smooth. Drizzle the cinnamon mixture over apple slices.

Apple Cake
Apple Cake 3 eggs 2 cups white sugar 1 cup vegetable oil 2 cups all-purpose flour 2 teaspoons ground cinnamon 1 teaspoon baking soda 1/2 teaspoon salt 1 teaspoon vanilla extract 1 cup chopped walnuts 4 cups thinly sliced apples 2 (4 ounce) packages cream cheese, softened 1/4 cup butter, melted 2 cups confectioners' sugar 1 teaspoon lemon juice Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Butter a 9x13 inch pan. Spread apples evenly over the bottom of the pan. Beat eggs with mixer until thick and light. Combine sugar and oil and add to eggs. Stir together flour, cinnamon, soda and salt. Add to egg mixture and beat in. Stir in nuts and vanilla. Batter will be very thick. Spread batter over apples in the pan. Bake at 350 degrees F (175 degrees C) for 1 hour, or until a toothpick inserted into the center comes out clean. Remove from the oven and cool. Spread with Cream Cheese Icing. To make Cream Cheese Icing: Beat cream cheese until fluffy. Beat in 1/4 cup melted butter, then beat in co

Folk Remedies
Source: Folk Remedies For Common Ailments By: Anne McIntyre ~Clove: In Elizabethan days, pomanders were made by studding oranges with cloves and letting them dry out. They were then hung from ribbons in wardrobes for their wonderful aroma and to repel moths, and carried about to counteract bad odors and disease-carrying germs. ~Carrot: Carrots have been used as a remedy for tuberculosis, scrofula, bronchitis, and pneumonia. A decoction of carrot seeds was taken for dysentery. ~ A vital Russian folk remedy was fresh carrot juice with honey and a little water. It was taken daily by the tablespoonful to cure colds and coughs and to ward off wintertime respiratory ailments. ~ Carrots are said to regulate women's menstrual flow and enhance milk production. ~Olive Oil: An enema of warm olive oil was a common remedy to relieve consumption, as it helps to break up the feces. ~ A traditional remedy for a sluggish liver and gall bladder problems was a tablespoonful of cold pr

Pizza Nachos
Ingredients: 1.) 12 tortilla chips 2.) 1/2 cup shredded mozzarella cheese 3.) 5 thin slices pepperoni or pepperoni chunks 4.) 1 tbsp. Grated Parmesan cheese 5.) 2 olives, sliced (optional) 6.) 1/4 cup pizza sauce or spaghetti sauce. Preparation: Place tortilla chips on a microwave safe plate, in a single layer. Top with mozzarella, pepperoni, Parmesan cheese and olives, if desired. Place pizza sauce in a small, covered, microwaveable bowl. Microwave sauce and nachos on high for 45 to 60 seconds, or until cheese melts and sauce is hot. Serve pizza sauce as a dip for the nachos. Makes 1 Serving.

Pumpkin Seeds
Cooking a Pumpkin - On a large counter or floor covered with newspaper, slice the pumpkin in half. - Scoop out the seeds and soak them in a large bowl of salt water. - Throw the rest of the pulp into your compost bin. - Place pumpkin cut side down on a cookie sheet. - Bake at 375Âº for approximately one hour or until skin is easily punctured with a meat fork. - Scoop flesh from skin and puree in food processor or blender. - Put colander in sink with a thin dish towel or linen sheet scrap. - Ladle pumpkin into your lined colander and let drain or squeeze towel to remove excess water. Use in cooked pumpkin in recipes right away or freeze in zippered bags for use throughout the year. Annette takes one day to cook and process all the pumpkins gathered in the fall. The pumpkin is frozen and used for her Christmas Pumpkin Bread recipe. Pumpkins Seeds - Soak in salt water overnight. (1 cup salt to 4 qts water) - Bake on cookie sheets at 350Âº turning once. - Cook approxi

Windy Road Ginger Lemonade
1 (12 oz can) frozen lemon juice concentrate 4 Cups Water 2 (12 oz bottles) Jamaican-Style Ginger Beer Ice Cubes Candied Ginger Chunks for Garnish Into a large pitcher, add lemonade concentrate and water. Top with Ginger Beer. Pour over ice and garnish with Candied Ginger.

Climax (mixed Drink)
Â½ Oz White Cream De Cocoa Â½ Oz Amoretto Â½ Oz Triple Sec Â½ Oz Vodka Â½ Oz Banana Liqueur 1 Oz Cream Stir ingredients in mixing glass with ice and shake well. Strain into chilled glasses.

Cran-maple Burbon Sauce
1/3 Cup Pure Maple Syrup 2 T. Sugar 1 Â½ Cup Cranberries 3 T. Butter 1 Â½ t. Bourbon Bring maple syrup and sugar to a boil in a small saucepan. Cook 3 minutes. Add cranberries and cook until burst, and begin to pop, about 6-8 min. Cut butter into 3 pieces. Remove the pan, whisk in butter, 1 piece at a time, making sure to mix it in slowly, and as one is mixed, then add another butter. Once it is mixed, Add the bourbon. Sauce can be refrigerated for up to a week.

Dutch Oven Pizza
Directions: There are no ingredients listed because this is more of an outdoor technique. I use a packaged refrigerated pizza dough that is pre-made by Pillsbury, and then I use bottled pizza sauce, cheese, and my own favorite toppings. What a lot of people donâ€™t understand about Dutch Ovens is that you can use the lids of them to cook things, including pizza. So, you use the Dutch Oven upside down in the coals, with the bottom acting as the top in this case. So, the main thing to think about before going out to camp is how will you remove the pizza from the lid- if the lid is buried in the coals? The best protection is to get welding gloves at the hardware store. You can have your pizza on foil in order to grab only the pizza, and you can then replace with another pizza that way if you are making a few with just the one Dutch Oven. Spray the oven lid and foils heavily with spray oil, and flour your hands to prevent sticking, before patting down the crust. You need a hot oven

Campfire Fajitas
1 lb. Boneless Skinless Chicken Breasts 1 Large Red Bell Pepper 5 Cloves Garlic, Minced. 1 T. Salt 1 T. Dried Cilantro 1 t. ground Cumin 1 Lime Flour Tortillas 1 Large Green Bell Pepper 1 Medium Yellow Onion Â½ Cup Olive Oil Â½ t. Ground Cayenne Pepper 1 T. Dried Oregano 2 T. liquid Smoke 2 T. Butter Guacamole Sour Cream Shredded Cheese of your choice. At Home) Slice chicken into 2-3 inch strips, place in an air-tight container, add olive oil, garlic, liquid smoke and spices, stir to cover, and refrigerate. De-seed and core the peppers, slice them into 2-3 inch strips as well, then do the same with the onion. Place them in an air tight container and refrigerate until camp. (At Camp) Get a hot fire going and place the chicken across the campfire grate. While the chicken is cooking, in a large skillet melt the butter and vegetables. SautÃ© until onions are translucent. Combine everything in a flour tortilla and wrap and enjoy!

Truth Or Dare ............
play TRUTH/DARE (& be honest) I dare you to tell me the truth: Four things you want to know about me: 01. 02. 03. 04. Three things you like about me: 01. 02. 03. Two things you don't like about me: 01. 02. My best feature: 01. Two things you want to do with me: 01. 02. One word that describe me: 01. One question for me: 01. repost this see how many people do this to you Just copy and send to me...

Serj Tankian - Empty Walls
Your empty walls... Your empty walls... Pretentious attention Dismissive aprehension Don't waste your time, on coffins today When we decline, from the confines of our mind Don't waste your time, on coffins today Don't you see their bodies burning? Desolate and full of yearning Dying of anticipation Choking from intoxication Don't you see their bodies burning? Desolate and full of yearning Dying of anticipation Choking from intoxication I want you To be Left behind those empty walls Told you To see From behind those empty walls Those empty walls When we decline, from the confines of our mind Don't waste your time, on coffins today Don't you see their bodies burning? Desolate and full of yearning Dying of anticipation Choking from intoxication Don't you see their bodies burning? Desolate and full of yearning Dying of anticipation Choking from intoxication I want you To be Left behind those empty walls Told you To see From behind those em

Chicken Rice Casserole
chicken rice casserole 2 cups rice 2 cans cream of mushroom or golden mushroom soup 2 cans water 2 chickens (cut in serving pieces) put rice, soup, water in dutch oven (12 inch). stir place chicken on top of mixture. cover. cook 1 1/4 to 1 1/2 hours at 400 degrees.

A New "abc Of Topics".
A few weeks ago I posted a series of topics that in alphabetical order. Many of them were somewhat dated. So I will write about a new series topics. But this time the topics will be more controversial and in line with current events. I hope you enjoy and discuss them with me and others.

Coffee Mixes
Great for gift giving. Flavored Coffee Mixes For all the coffee recipes except the cafe' au lait, use 1 to 2 spoonfuls to one mug of hot water (to desired taste) CAFE' L'ORANGE 2/3 cup instant coffee 1 cup sugar 1 tsp. dried crushed orange peel 1/4 tsp. cinnamon CAFE' _MOCHA 2/3 cup instant coffee 3 TBSP unsweetened cocoa 1 1/3 cups sugar 1 cup non-dairy creamer 1/4 cup nonfat dry milk CINNAMON-N-SPICE 2/3 cup instant coffee 1 1/3 cup sugar 1/2 tsp. cinnamon 1/2 tsp. nutmeg 1/2 tsp. allspice TOFFEE COFFEE 1 cup instant coffee 1 cup non-dairy creamer 1 cup brown sugar CAFE' VIENNA 1 cup instant coffee 1 1/3 cups sugar 1 1/3 cups nonfat dry milk 1 tsp. cinnamon CAFE' ORANGE CAPPUCCINO 1 cup instant coffee 1 1/2 cups sugar 2 cups nonfat dry milk 1 tsp. dry orange peel SWISS _MOCHA 1 cup instant coffee 1 cup sugar 2 cups nonfat dry milk 4 tsp. cocoa powder CAFE' VIENNA MIX 1 cup instant coffee 1 cup s

No Bake Pumpkin Pie
No Bake Pumpkin Pie 2/3 cup milk 1 cup pumpkin puree 1 (3.4 ounce) package instant vanilla pudding mix 1/2 teaspoon pumpkin pie spice 1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon 1 cup frozen whipped topping, thawed 1 (9 inch) pie shell, baked or graham crucker crust DIRECTIONS: In a large bowl, mix the milk and pumpkin until smooth. Add the pudding mix, pumpkin pie spice and cinnamon and mix until well combined. Fold in the whipped topping and pour into pie shell. Refrigerate until serving.

Christmas Candy Cane Cake
Christmas Candy Cane Cake Servings: 10 1 package 2 layer chocolate cake mix, any variety 1 package 4 (serving size) chocolate flavor instant pudding & pie filling 4 eggs 1 ~ 8 ounce container sour cream 1/2 cup vegetable oil 1/2 cup water 4 squares, semi ~ sweet baking chocolate, chopped 1 1/2 cups candy canes, coarsely crushed , divided 1 ~ 8 ounce whipped topping, thawed Preheat oven to 350°. Lightly grease 2 - 9" round cake pans, line with wax paper. Beat cake mix, dry pudding mix, eggs, sour cream, oil and water in large bowl with electric mixer on low speed just until moistened, scraping side of bowl frequently. Beat on medium speed 2 minutes or until well blended. Stir in chopped chocolate and 4 tablespoons of the crushed candy canes. Spoon batter into prepared pan. Bake 50 minutes to 1 hour or until toothpick inserted near center comes out clean. Cool in pans for 10 minutes on a wire rack. Loosen cake from side of pan with spatula or

Roast Beef With Horseradish Sauce
Roast Beef with Horseradish Sauce 1/2 cup whipping cream 1/3 cup A.1. Original Steak Sauce 1/4 cup chopped green onions 3 Tbsp. KRAFT Prepared Horseradish 1 beef eye round roast (2 lb.) Salt and pepper (optional) PREHEAT oven to 325°F. Beat whipping cream with electric mixer on high speed until soft peaks form; set aside. Mix steak sauce, onions and horseradish in medium bowl. Add whipped cream; stir gently until well blended. Cover. Refrigerate until ready to use. SEASON meat with salt and pepper; place in roasting pan. BAKE 45 minutes to 1 hour 15 minutes or until cooked through. Cut meat into thin slices. Serve with whipped cream mixture. Let roast stand, covered loosely with foil, at room temperature for 10 to 15 minutes after removing from oven to retain the meat juices and make carving easier.

A Bit About Us
We are Jessica and Eric of Rhode Island. We both grew up in North Providence, and currently reside in Johnston. We have been involved in art in one form or another all our lives, and finally decided that we should do something with it! We specialize in custom, hand~made products. We have a wide variety of hand~made jewelry; chain maille; Mala beads; soy candles; soy~based shampoo, conditioner, lotion, and spray; vegetable glycerin hand and bar soap; and new and exciting products from artists near and far! We have added some new artists, with more coming all the time, so make sure you have a look at what they can do! Our constantly changing website is www.jecreations-llc.com. Please come on over and have a look! Any questions or feedback are more than welcome! E~mail us at: jessanderic@jecreations-llc.com We are an internet~based business presently, and will eventually be brick and mortar. In addition to the website, we also do house parties, local shows, and fairs/festivals! We

Never Mix Vodka And Red Bull
Mixing alcohol with energy drinks such as Red Bull is like 'mixing cocaine with heroin', a drugs expert had claimed. Don Serratt, founder of British drug treatment centre Life Works, said mixing extreme quantities of the stimulant caffeine with the depressant alchol was 'a very dangerous cocktail'. He was responding to a study which found young adults were twice as likely to be hurt and require medical attention and twice as likely to travel with a drunk driver if they had the cocktail, than those who did not mix their drinks. Read more... * The ladette effect puts 40% more children in rehab for alcohol abuse In the first study of its kind, American researchers questioned 4,271 students from 10 U.S. universities about their drinking habits and the consequences. They found, compared to those who did not mix caffeine and alcohol they had almost double the risk of being taken advantage of sexually. In a typical drinking session, they drank up to 36 per cent more t

Rockin In The Portal
COME JOIN US !!! What are you doing right now? Seriously? Bored at work? Talking to some fake person? Staring at Nude pics which really are not them? Bored as hell? Then come join me in one of my lounges. No drama. No Bullshit. No one in a critical state and dying every week....Just good people and great friends. Click one of the pics below and get transported to a whole new level of fun! Come take a trip through ~ஐ~Oñyx Pórtál~ஐ~!!!! Where the fun and friends never end!!! (repost of original by '~ஐ~ ONYX ~SB Fam ~ஐ~ Oñyx Pórtál' on '2007-11-05 11:12:41')

Kanye West - Jesus Walks
We need to recruit all the soldiers All of God's soldiers We at war We at war with society, racism, terrosism, and most of all we at war wit ourselves (Jesus Walks) God show me a way because the Devil's trying to break me down (Jesus Walks with me) with me with me with me [fades] You know who the Midwest is? Young & Restless Where restless [Niggaz] might snatch yo necklace And next these [Niggaz] might jack yo Lexus Somebody tell these [Niggaz] who Kanye West is I walk through the valley of the shadow of death is Top floor, the view alone will leave you breathless Uhhhh! Try to catch it Uhhhh! It's kinda hard Getting choked by the detectives yeah yeah now check the method They be asking us questions, harassin', arrest us Saying "We eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast." Huh? Ya'll eat pieces of shit? What's the basis? We ain't going nowhere but got suits and cases A trunk full of coke, rental car from Avis My momma used to say only Jesus can save us Well

In Honor Of Stupid People
In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed to stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods: On a Sears hairdryer -- Do not use while sleeping. (Shoot, and that's the only time I have to work on my hair.) On a bag of Fritos -- You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special)? On a bar of Dial soap -- "Directions: Use like regular soap," (and that would be how???....) On some Swanson frozen dinners -- "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (but, it's "just" a suggestion). On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom) -- "Do not turn upside down." (well...duh, a bit late, huh)! On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding -- "Product will be hot after heating." (...and you thought????...) On packaging for a Rowena iron -- "Do not iron clothes on body." (but wouldn't this save me more time)? On Boot's Children Cough Medicine -- "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication

Things You’ll Learn From A Dog
When loved ones come home, always run to greet them. Never pass up the opportunity to go for a joyride. Allow the experience of fresh air and the wind in your face to be pure ecstasy. When it's in your best interest, practice obedience Let others know when they've invaded your territory. Take naps. Stretch before rising. Run, romp, and play daily. Thrive on attention and let people touch you. Avoid biting when a simple growl will do. On warm days, stop to lie on your back on the grass. On hot days, drink lots of water and lie under a shady tree. When you're happy, dance around and wag your entire body. No matter how often you're scolded, don't buy into the guilt thing and pout... run right back and make friends. Delight in the simple joy of a long walk. Eat with gusto and enthusiasm. Stop when you have had enough. Be Loyal. Never pretend to be something you're not. If what you want lies buried, dig until you find it. When someone is ha

Dictionary For Womens Personal Ads
DICTIONARY FOR WOMEN'S PERSONAL ADS 40-ish - 49 Adventurous - Slept with everyone Athletic - No tits Average looking - Ugly Beautiful - Pathological liar Contagious Smile - Does a lot of pills Emotionally secure - On medication Feminist - Fat Free spirit - Junkie Friendship first - Former very *friendly* person Fun - Annoying New Age - Body hair in the wrong places Open-minded - Desperate

Rectum Deoderant
Rectum Deodorant!!! >>> >>> A blonde walks into a pharmacy and asks for some Rectum deodorant. >>> >>> The pharmacist, a little bemused, Explains to the woman that they >>> don't sell rectum Deodorant, and never have. >>> >>> Unfazed, the blonde assures the pharmacist that she Has been buying >>> the stuff from drug stores on a Regular basis and would like some > more. >>> >>> "I'm sorry", says the pharmacist, "we don't have Any" >>> >>> "But I always buy it at drug stores," says the Blonde. >>> >>> "Do you have the container that it came in?" asks The pharmacist... >>> >>> "YES", said the blonde, "I'll go home and get it.." >>> >>> She returns with the container and hands it to the Pharmacist who >>> looks at it and says to her, "This is just a normal stick of underarm > >>> deodorant" >>> >>> Annoyed, the blonde snatches the container back and Reads out loud >>> from the container... >>> >>> "TO APPLY, PUSH UP BOTTOM." -- "Life is a coin.

Men!!!!!!
He said - Shall we change positions tonight? She said . That's a good idea - you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa. He said . . .. What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you? She said . Turn sideways and look in the mirror ! Q.How many honest, intelligent, caring men in the world does it take to do the dishes? A. Both of them. Q.What is the difference between men and government bonds? A. The bonds mature. Q..Why are blonde jokes so short? A.So men can remember them. QHow many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper? A.We don't know; it has never happened. Q. What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night? A.. A widow. Q. Why are married women heavier than single women? A.Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed. Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge. Q.What is the one thing that all men at singles b

Agree Or Disagree!!!
AGREE OR DELETE Andy Rooney DID YOU KNOW? As you walk up the steps to the building which houses the U.S Supreme Court you can see near the top of the building a row of the world's law givers and each one is facing one in the middle who is facing forward with a full frontal view .. it is Moses and he is holding the Ten Commandments! . DID YOU KNOW? As you enter the Supreme Court courtroom, the two huge oak doors have the Ten Commandments engraved on each lower portion of each door. DID YOU KNOW? As you sit inside the courtroom, you can see the wall, right above where the Supreme Court judges sit, a display of the Ten Commandments! DID YOU KNOW? There are Bible verses etched in stone all over the Federal Buildings and Monuments in Washington , D.C . DID YOU KNOW? James Madison, the fourth president, known as "The Father of Our Constitution" made the following statement: "We have staked the whole of all our political institutions upon the capaci

The Bear And The Athiest!!
An Atheist was walking through the woods. "What majestic trees"! "What powerful rivers"! "What beautiful animals"! He said to himself. As he was walking alongside the river, he heard a rustling in the bushes behind him. He turned to look. He saw a 7-foot grizzly bear charge towards him. He ran as fast as he could up the path. He looked over his shoulder & saw that the bear was closing in on him. He looked over his shoulder again, & the bear was even closer. He tripped & fell on the ground. He rolled over to pick himself up but saw that the bear was right on top of him, reaching for him with his left paw & raising his right paw to strike him. At that instant the Atheist cried out, "Oh my God!" Time Stopped. The bear froze. The forest was silent. As a bright light shone upon the man, a voice came out of the sky. "You deny my existence for all these years, teach others I don't exist and even credit creation to cosmic accident." "Do you

Hormone
THE HORMONE HOSTAGE The hormone hostage knows that there are days in the month when all a man has to do is open his mouth & he takes his life into his own hands! This is a handy guide that should be as common as a driver's license in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend, co-worker, or significant other! DANGEROUS: SAFER: SAFEST: ULTRA SAFE: WHAT'S FOR DINNER? CAN I HELP YOU WITH DINNER? WHERE WOULD YOU LIKE TO GO FOR DINNER? HERE, HAVE SOME WINE. ARE YOU WEARING THAT? WOW, YOU SURE LOOK GOOD IN BROWN! WOW! LOOK AT YOU! HERE, HAVE SOME WINE. WHAT ARE YOU SO WORKED UP ABOUT? COULD WE BE OVERREACTING? HERE'S MY PAYCHECK. HERE, HAVE SOME WINE. SHOULD YOU BE EATING THAT? YOU KNOW, THERE ARE A LOT OF APPLES LEFT. CAN I GET YOU A PIECE OF CHOCOLATE WITH THAT? HERE, HAVE SOME WINE. WHAT DID YOU DO ALL DAY? I HOPE YOU DIDN'T OVER-DO IT TODAY. I'VE ALWAYS LOVED YOU IN THAT ROBE! HERE, HAVE SOME MORE WINE. 13 THINGS PMS STANDS FOR: 1. PASS MY SHOTGUN

Vocabulary Lesson!!
Subject: FW: Hilarious Vocabulary lesson A young boy went up to his father and asked him, "Dad, what is the difference between potentially and realistically?" The father thought for a moment, then answered, "Go ask your mother if she would sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars. Then ask your sister if she would sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars, and then, ask your brother if he'd sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars. Come back and tell me what you learn from that." So the boy went to his mother and asked, "Would you sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars?" The mother replied, "Of course I would! We could really use that money to fix up the house and send you kids to a great University!" The boy then went to his sister and asked, "Would you sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars?" The girl replied, "Oh my God! I LOVE Brad Pitt I would sleep with him in a heartbeat, are you nuts?!?!?! " The boy then went to his brother and asked, "Wo

Just Love When It Says.....
ever have one of them nights or mornings and someone posts something real cool, and you go: "HEY! that is so fucking neat!" so when you try it...it dont work, you go bitch at FUBAR..lol they say hey thats not us man thats whoeve ya got the codes from....:P:P:P:P...you go aww fuck....so you gotta go back or it doesnt show up on the persons comments page. just goes t o show..some of got, and some of us aint... I CALL IT FUBAR MADNESS

Marilyn Manson - 1996(live)
Light a candle for the sinners set the world on fire.... (muahahaha) anti choice anti girl I am the anti-flag unfurled anti white and anti man I got the anti-future plan anti fascist anti mod I am the anti-music god anti sober anti whore there will never be enough of anti- law I can't believe in nothings that don't believe in me now it's your turn to see what I hate about me anti people now you've gone too far (here's your) antichrist superstar anti money anti hate anti things I fucked and ate anti cop and anti fun here is my anti-president gun anti Satan anti black the anti world is on my back anti gay and anti dope I am the faggot anti-pope I can't believe in nothings that don't believe in me now it's your turn to see what I hate about me anti people now you've gone too far (here's your) antichrist superstar anti people now you've gone too far (here's your) antichrist superstar (This is where your faith is) (Not they, not they say )(4x) ant

Good Riddance Time Of Your Life By Greenday
Good Riddance (Time Of Your Life) (fuck) Another turning point a fork stuck in the road Time grabs you by the wrist directs you where to go So make the best of this test and don't ask why It's not a question but a lesson learned in time It's something unpredictable But in the end is right I hope you had the time of your life So take the photographs and still frames in your mind Hang it on a shelf in good health and good time Tattoos of memories and dead skin on trial For what it's worth it was worth all the while It's something unpredictable But in the end is right I hope you had the time of your life It's something unpredictable But in the end is right I hope you had the time of your life It's something unpredictable But in the end is right I hope you had the time of your life

When It Comes To Dancing...
War, in the older days whether a man fought with a sword or gun. At night they acted as Gentlemen by dancing the Waltz. I don't think it happened here in the U.S., if it did it probably happened when alot of new people came here. For 'our' Fore Fathers I say thank you. If it wasn't for them I swear I really don't know how we would be dancing. Sure some American Indians dances are cool but for women not like lady like. As my dad calls me heathen, why did he call me that? Not for Indian dancing but what I make, like Dreamcatchers, leather pouches as in Medicine Bags and personal pouches (that each people puts in what they find that they consider is what their Spirit Guides give them for many reasons), I make God Eyes and alot of different Indian Artwork. I remember saying to my dad 'Thank you', cause I do have a little Cherokee in me.

#2
ok so your semi absent minded author here ready for another round ... OF RANTING! the subject is ego. not the yummy breakfast waffels eggo but holier than thou better than thou ego. now we all have ego. thats not the issue the issue arises when this ego runs your entire person. now im a proud man by nature this is true but for people to say that they are better than everyone else is kind of silly. i mean honestly if your so much better than how come people force themselves to put up with you. the egotistical state of people nowadays is just out right sad if you look down at your fellow man for too long you wont have them around and the greatest fall of all is a fall alone. when you push people away then you will truely being alone and then who will you look down on? aha your own silly egotistical self. mmm taste like fun to me! lol. oh well i have to run enjoy and remember share my rants with friends and always do one good deed a day.

Blonde And The Sheepherder
Once upon a time there was a blonde. She had long, blonde hair, blue eyes, and she was sick of all the blonde jokes. One day, she decided to get a make over, so she cut and dyed her hair. She also went out and bought a new convertible. She went driving down a country road and came across a herd of sheep. She stopped and called the sheepherder over. That's a nice flock of sheep. she said. Well thank you.", said the herder. Tell you what. I have a proposition for you.", said the woman. Okay.", replied the herder. I can guess the exact number of sheep in your flock, can I take one home?", asked the woman. Sure.", said the sheep herder. So, the girl sat up and looked at the herd for a second and then replied,382". Wow.", said the herder. That is exactly right. Go ahead and pick out the sheep you want to take home." So the woman went and picked one out and put it in her car. Upon watching this, the herder approached the woman and offered, Okay, now I have a pr

Image
what ever happened to the days of the bigger women were considered beautiful and healthy. what happened to there not being a body image. now a days you have to be skinny or have big boobs to get noticed. Now don't get me wrong I am not putting down the girls that are skinny and all that but damn guys come on the bigger girls can be beautiful too. Yea we may not have the body of a goddess or of a model but he do and most of us can be more sweeter then most. If our body is our only flaw then hey I can live with that. and If you haven't had a big girl in bed you don't know what you are missing. For all the people that think of us as gross and unappealing FUCK YOU! U all are the reason all the plastic surgeons have the nice ass houses and cars. Be happy with your body if you got it let them know. But do it tastefully. Ladies not everyone wants to see your tits and your pussies so put that shit away have some respect for yourselves. Guys not everyone wants to see your penis's and balls and

Every Minute
Never had a girl that ever made me feel like I feel im not tryin to run game on you im just keepin it real even when your not around im still thinkin of you and when I close my eyes at night im always dreamin of you when I was younger I swore I would be a playa fo life but since we met ill I wanted to do was make you my wife all my friends say im crazy and I should leave you alone but still I call you cuz I luv to hear your voice on the phone and when I see you I look into your beautiful eyes we both smile and it really makes my temperature rise I know your mama wouldn’t like me she would say you could do better but I hope you wouldn’t listen cuz were meant to be together forever I keep you warm in the winter safe in the dark those other girls had my body but I give you my heart cuz you’re my baby girl suga suga suga doowop your so hot and Mr. Capone loves you a lot

Statues Granted Live!
In a city park stood two statues, one female and the other male. These two statues faced each other for many years. Early one morning, an angel appeared before the statues and said, "Since the two of you have been exemplary statues and have brought enjoyment to many people, I am giving you your greatest wish. I hereby give you the gift of life. You have 30 minutes to do whatever you desire." And so the statues came to life. They smiled at each other, ran toward some nearby woods and dove behind some bushes. The angel smiled to himself as he listened to the two giggling, bushes rustling, andtwigs snapping. After 15 minutes, the two statues emerged from the bushes, satisfied and smiling. Puzzled, the angel looked at his watch and said to the statues, "You still have 15 minutes. Would you like to continue?" The male statue looked at the female and asked, "Do you want to do it again?" Smiling, the female statue said, "Sure, but this time YOU hold the pigeon and I'LL shi

You
Sometimes at night, when I look to the sky, I start thinking of you and then ask myself, why? Why do I love you? I think and smile, because I know the list could run on for miles. The whisper of your voice, the warmth of your touch, so many little things that make me love you so much. The way you support me, and help with my emotions, the way that you care and show such devotion. The way that your kiss, fills me with desire, and how you hold me with the warmth of a blazing fire. The way your eyes shine when you look at me, lost with you forever is where I want to be. The way that I feel when you're by my side, a sense of completion and overflowing pride. The dreams that I dream, that all involve you, the possibilities I see and the things we can do. How you finish the puzzle that lies inside my heart, how that deep in my soul, you are the most important part. I could go on for days, telling of what I feel, but all you really must know is my love for you is real.

Hello Out There
I am nosy.. I am curious... I am not interested in you if you are male and under the age of 35. I am curious about bdsm and still figuring out if I am more sub or domme... over 35? male? intelligent and articulate? I want to hear from you, mister :)

Worth
We cannot beg someone to stay if they want to leave and be with someone else. We have to admit that love doesn't give us the license to own a person. This is what love means...Sacrifice... After a while you learn the subtle difference between holding a hand and chaining a soul, and you learn that love doesn't mean leaning and company doesn't mean security, and you begin to learn that kisses aren't contracts and presents aren't promises, and you begin to accept your defeats with your head up and your eyes open, with the grace of an adult, not the grief of a child. You learn to build all your roads on today because tomorrow's ground is too uncertain for plans. After a while you learn that even sunshine burns if you get too much. So, plant your own garden and decorate your own soul, instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers. And you learn that you really can endure....that you really are strong, and you really do have worth.. Today seems to be the day, when so many people turn t

Dont Know Why A Even Say
anything 1/2 girls dont read this sfuff any how,gess its because i think im not going too get too see the new down in lyon ga. dont think i will be able too keep my word unless something major happen like i buy this van,in the next 2 day,$2500,for a 2003,but its got 250,000 miles on it been using it for the last few days at work,works quit good but its a 8cyl,sucks gas,will not all that bad if i only drive it 200 miles a day ,at least some other company will take me and my big van if i dont start making $700 a week agin,shit at one time when gas was $1,27 a gal i was making $3,000 a week trips up too chisgo,2 a week,gas is more should be making a lot more money

Moviw Review: Star Wars-episode Iii: Revenge Of The Sith (2005)
This is part three of a six part space saga. Plot: Anakin Skywalker falls to the Dark Side of the Force as the Clone Wars end. Likes: Tons of action and battle scenes.; Great music.; Compelling storyline.; A good steady pace with the right amount of dialogue. Dislikes: Some characters looked too unnatural. You could tell they were computer drawn.; Not enough background given about Gen. Grievous. His scenes were too few and short. Rating: PG-13 for violence and gore. Parental Guide: Not for young children (8 and younger) because a few scenes are too intense. Out of 4 Stars: 4 Stars. It is the best "Star Wars" film of the six films. A must see by all.

My Shoulders
Are my shoulders strong enough to lift you from the mire? Can they endure the the strain and burn to lift you even higher? Can my presence give to you a friendship you can trust? A knowing in your heart and soul that tells you that you must. Reach out my friend and take my hand if ever you are wronged. I'll be there to lift you up my shoulders they are strong

Random
So i just got back from this random farm.holy dogs n cats lol so cute,and u kno me i had to play with all of em! so right now im watching dracula.as well as studying him. who wants to go to castle dracula with me,if u go on tour u can spend the night in there. OMG I WANNA GO!!!! i only need 715 in euro. which is aboot 1000$ here,not bad really cuz u get to go to all of the places in the book. fun fun sexy time!

Taking It To The Next Level...
So you saw somebody cute... and you rated her... and you fan'd her... but you don't want to friend request because that may be too forward, you haven't even spoken with her yet... What's your next move?

Korn - Here To Stay
This time, taking it away I've got a problem, with me getting in the way, Not by design (Could be "My violent side") So I take my face and bash it into a mirror. I won't have to see the pain (Bleed, Bleed) This state is elevating, as the hurt turns into hating. Anticipating, all the fucked up feelings again. The hurt inside is fading This shit gone way too far. All this time I've been waiting No I can not grieve anymore. For what's inside awaking. *I'm done*, I'm not a whore You've taken everything and oh I can not give anymore. My mind is done with this Okay, I've got a question. "Can I throw it all away?" Take back what's mine So I take my time, guiding the blade down the line Each cut closer to the vein (Bleed, Bleed) This state is elevating, as the hurt turns into hating. Anticipating, all the fucked up feelings again. The hurt inside is fading This shit gone way too far. All this time I've been waiting No I can not grieve anymore. For what's insid

How To Appreciate Death Metal
While most people associate death metal music with a bunch of guys grunting and slapping detuned guitars randomly, there's a multitude of reasons why this genre maintains a strong following and earns the fierce loyalty of many listeners worldwide. If you're curious about death metal, here's you're chance to learn, appreciate, listen, and enjoy. But Death Metal truly rocks! Learn about the history and characteristics of death metal. I bet that it’s more interesting and complex than you thought. Also, learn about all the stereotypes of death metal music and its fans and why they aren't true at all. They are not all lazy, Satan-worshipping, animal-sacrificing psychos. They are actually normal people with family, friends and complex off-stage personalities. Listen beyond the crunching guitars and harsh singing. Although the rough guitar sound and grating vocals permeate all of death metal, it can take a little getting used to, especially if your ears are accustomed to softer sounds.

You Know You Live In Arkansas!!!!
Subject: Things I've Learned Living in Arkansas Possums sleep in the middle of the road with their feet in the air. There are 5,000 types of snakes and 4,998 live in Arkansas . There are 10,000 types of spiders. All 10,000 live in Arkansas plus a couple no one's seen before. If it grows, it sticks; if it crawls, it bites. Onced and twiced are words. It is not a shopping cart; it is a buggy. People actually grow and eat okra. Fixinto is one word. There is no such thing as "lunch." There is only dinner. And then there is supper. Iced tea is appropriate for all meals and you start drinking it when you're two. We do like a little tea with our sugar! Backards and forwards means "I know everything about you." DJeet yet? is actually a phrase meaning "Did you eat yet?" You don't have to wear a watch because it doesn't matter what time it is. You work until you

Green Beans With Walnuts
INGREDIENTS * 2 pounds fresh green beans, washed and trimmed * 2 tablespoons butter * 1 cup chopped walnuts * 2 tablespoons walnut oil * 2 tablespoons minced fresh parsley * ground black pepper to taste * salt to taste DIRECTIONS 1. Place the walnuts on an ungreased baking sheet. Bake at 350 degrees F (175 degrees C) for 5 to 8 minutes. 2. Cook beans in large pot of boiling salted water until just tender, about 5 minutes. Drain. Rinse beans with cold water, and drain well. Can be prepared 6 hours ahead. Let stand at room temperature. 3. Melt butter or margarine with oil in heavy large skillet over high heat. Add beans and toss until heated through, about 4 minutes. Season with salt and pepper. Add walnuts and parsley and toss. Transfer to bowl and serve

Talking Dog!!!
Talking Dog A guy is driving around the back woods of Tennessee and he sees a sign in front of a broken down shanty-style house: "Talking Dog for Sale ." He rings the bell and the owner appears and tells him the dog is in the backyard. The guy goes into the backyard and sees a nice looking Labrador retriever sitting there. "You talk?" he asks. "Yep," the lab replies. After the guy recovers from the shock of hearing a dog talk, he says "So, what's your story?" The Lab looks up and says, "Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA and they had me sworn into the toughest branch of the armed services .the United States Marines .you know one of their nicknames is "The Devil Dogs". In no time at all they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders; because no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping. I was one of their most valuable spies for

Trust Company - Downfall
Remember these guys? they were fun :D Fear in me so deep it gets the best of me, In the fear I fall, here it comes face to face with me, Here I stand, hold back so no one can see, I feel these wounds, step down, step down, step down. (am I) Breaking Down Can I break away Push me away, make me fall, Just to see, another side of me, Push me away, you can see, what I see, the other side of me. Fall back on me, and I'll be the strength I need, to save me now, just come face to face with me, stay in place you'll be the first to see, me heal these wounds, step down, step down, step down, down I'm not breaking, down can I break away push me away, make me fall, just to see another side of me, push me away you can see, what I see, the other side of me Go! Fall, can I break away push me away, make me fall, just to see another side of me, push me away you can see, what I see, the other side of me No one can see anything on the other side of me I walk, I

That 360 Shithole
EPICINE SYMMETRIES... DJT 2007 THE ALLURE OF PIETY SO CLEARLY SEEN BECKON YOU AND ME IN PURBLIND HASTE STASTUESQUE, MISCHIEVOUS, A VAGRANT SERAPHIC GAZE OBFUSCATES THEIR VALE FURTIVE ATTEMPTS TO DISLODGE ONES GAINS THEY EXPEND THEIR BLOOM IN VAIN TO LIST I AM FAIN OF WHAT HERE AMAIN YOUR LOVE FOR ME LAIN SO SURE AS SPRING RAINS A CONSPIRACY RIFE WITH STRIFE MAKES US WEARY SEEING EVER SO MORE CLEARLY SOMETHING AMONGST THE LEAVES WRACKS OUT NAUGHT FEELING THE FOOL AS IF CAUGHT CHECKING PATHS FOR PRETENCE AND KNOWING FOREVER I YOUUUUU HAVE SOUGHT PENSIVE AND LOITERING EGOS THROTING AGITATION FOR PENNANCE BUT NAUGHT EXTINUATES AND DIMS AS A HUSH FALLS FOR ALL ACCLAIM OUR LOVE STAYS THOUGH NOW NONE THE LAME THEIR GAFFE NON PLUS NO? THE PATH TO US NOBLER BY IGNORACE SHOWN VERY BEAUTIFULLY LIMNS AN ALREADY CUSPATE LOVE HONED! FORLORN BOUGHS BECLOUD OUR CERT WENDED OVER FASCADES TRAVERSED A LOVE BEGUILED YET NEVER ADVERSE FOIL THEMSELVES BLOWN

Force Fed Blondie Blog #1
FORCE FED BLONDIE BLOG #1 LOL....ACTUALLY TO TELL YA ALL SORRY I AM ME! MY COMPENDIUM OF EXTINUATION: An Intraspective Guise? This is a bit old and rather directed to ONE...but now has a bit wider plane to sail! I appreciate you all...and your words of wisdom and hope...I am not able to clarify right now........accept my apologies Never averse to obfuscate the acuity of my own empiricism, I must draw retrospectively from the modalities of langour whenst pretentious utterences, once ephemeral, become none the more than veritable conjecture. With all veracity opined, my acromonious and iracible behavior, however mundane, has become emanantly palpable in essence. Quite amenable momentarily, I write this not to confute, but to assuage these dogmatic tendencies of late for a more terse euphemism of sort: I am now compelled to ascribe these seemingly congruent corallaries to mere tenet; I am incontrivertably a jackass with indelible flaws though explicable by

Rob... Monkeyshine Bafoonery! Or Thumper!
WHAT A PATHETIC LOSER THIS CAT IS.. NOTHIN BETTER TO DO THAN TO BORE PEOPLE WITH RESONANCE RESOUNDING FROM ITS STEEL BALLS CLINCHED IN ITS OWN MOUTH! ITS BOMBASTIC DISPOSITION IS THAT OF AN ALPA MALE BONOBO... TRANSFERENCE OF ITS EPICINE CRUX ALL BUT A PARTI PRIS TO AN ESOTERIC CONSUMMATION THAT IT CAN AND WILL VICILLATE ITS OWN TERRENE; AKIN TO A CHAMELEON POSTULATING EXISTENCE AS A KOMODO DRAGON. ACCEDENCE IT ENCUMBERS WITH MERE PLAUDIT OR REVERANCE FOR ITS HIGHFALUTIN ARRAYAL OF LANGUID VIRILITY WHENST ITS UNTENABLE INDIGNATION OF VERITY LACKS ANY ELOCUTION OF DIGNITY NOR THAT OF LUCRE AND ERGO, DILUTE.. DISCORD...VENEER! CONTRITION BIDES THOSE CLOTHED IN TRANSCENDENTAL ROBES IN MOUNTEBANK FASHION. RHETORIC AND SOCIAL GOSPEL DISPELLS ITS PLEBEIAN DERIVATION POLEMICALLY FEIGNED AS SCHISMATIC DIATRIBE BETWIXT SUBLUNARY AND SOMEWHAT QUASI-PHILOSOPHIC PARROTING OF THOSE INCULCATED THROUGH THE TEMPORAL INVOCATIONS OF THE SUPERMUNDANE ASCETICS OF THE PARSON LURKING, ALBEIT SURREPTITIOUSLY

Conceit: Hedonism Of Self! Profuse Illations Elucidating My Avidity!!!
CONCEIT: Hedonism of self! Profuse illations elucidating my avidity!!! No adversions to their solicitude! No animosity for yore! Abundant sentiment traversing present course! Surreal polish in a terrene of ataxia...mere confusion in this microcosm of such naught! Bliss: fathomed for untold opulence, those sought endogenously without tangible devoir nor that of inhibition for just such! Verity: contrived through empathy and fortuity yet a repose to speculation and contingency! Behold the allurement of this rose and gaze within the essence of this which I discant! To ken these paragons of deliverence intrinsically and with all veracity impels honour and grace; this bestowed upon me of all! Conceit it seems dispells perception of exactly why I linger..... I occupy the bosom of two as one nehil of such reverence can boast! Meus rara avis: MOPAs.... and heres a song! Sanctuary....UTADA HIKARU Sanctuary Lyrics In you and I there's

Shit Happens !!!
Dear all, am now signing off for the night and thought that I might do so leaving you with the following for your consideration which just might be...THE MOST UNIVERSAL AND FUNCTIONAL WORD IN THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE... WHAT IS IT... ??? (HOPEFULLY THIS WILL MAKE YOU SMILE).... Well, it's SHIT ... that's right, SHIT ! Shit may just be the most functional and universally employed word in the English language. Why ??? Because,,, You can smoke shit, buy shit, sell shit, lose shit, find shit, forget shit, and maybe even tell others to eat shit. On the other hand, some people "know their shit," while others "can't tell the difference between shit and shineola." There are lucky shits, dumb shits, and crazy shits. There also is bullshit, horseshit, and chickenshit. You can throw shit, sling shit, catch shit, shoot-the-shit, and/or duck when the shit hits-the-fan. You can also give-a-shit and/or serve shit-on-a-shingle. You can find yourself i

My Sweet Loretta Part I
I never realized that my studio could be so dark until that night. The walnut stained paneling combined with the thick brown shag carpet reflected very little of the dying fire that rested in the brick fireplace. The crumbling embers were all that were left of the once blazing multiple log fire. It seemed that the room was even more eerie with the long shadows and haunting glow than if the fire had died a quick death. Outside of my studio window, a violent storm offered very little assistance. The large thunderstorm clouds filled the sky. Whatever light might have shone from the moon or stars had been totally blocked allowing only the blackest of night to shine into the window. The devilish howling wind added no light, but added to the atmosphere by whipping a tree limb dangerously close to the studio window. My safe and warm studio that I often retreated was no longer comfortable. Sittings in my large leather recliner, I could barely make out the black outline of the end table a

Limp Bizkit - Boiler
say what ya want about limp this was a really cool video Looks like I'm a do everything myself Maybe I could use some help but hell You want some done right You gotta do it yourself Maybe life is up and down but My life has been what till now I crawled up your butt somehow And that's when things got turned around I used to be alive I feel pathetic and now I get it What's done is done You just leave it alone and don't regret it But sometimes some things turn into dumb things And that's when you put your foot down. Why did I have to go and meet somebody like you (like you) Why did you have to go and hurt somebody like me (like me) How could you do somebody like that (like that) Hope you know that I'm never coming back (never coming back). Looks like I'm a do everything myself (everything myself) Maybe I could use some help but hell You want some done right You gotta do it yourself (got it) Maybe life is up and down but My life has been what till now (got i

Wicked Garden - Truly Madly Deeply
I DON'T KNOW WHATS WRONG WITH ME TODAY LOL I'M NOT IN THE ROCK MOOD I USUALLY AM IN I'll be your dream I'll be your wish I'll be your fantasy I'll be your hope I'll be your love Be everything that you need. I'll love you more with every breath Truly, madly, deeply do I will be strong I will be faithful 'cause I'm counting on A new beginning A reason for living A deeper meaning, yeah I wanna stand with you on a mountain I wanna bathe with you in the sea I wanna lay like this forever Until the sky falls down ON me And when the stars are shining brightly in the velvet sky, I'll make a wish, SEND IT to heaven then make you want to cry The tears of joy for all the pleasure in the certainty That we're surrounded by the comfort and protection of The highest powers In lonely hours the tears devour you I want to stand with you on a mountain I want to bathe with you in the sea I want to lay like this forever Until the sky falls down ON me Oh can't you se

Duncan Sheik - Barely Breathing
I know what you're doing, I see it all too clear I only taste the saline when I kiss away your tears You really had me going, wishing on a star But the black holes that surround you are heavier by far I believed in your confusion, you were so completely torn It must have been that yesterday was the day that I was born There's not much to examine, there's nothing left to hide You really can't be serious if you have to ask me why I say goodbye... 'Cause I am barely breathing And I can't find the air don't know who I'm kidding Imagining you care And I could stand here waiting A fool for another day I don't suppose it's worth the price, worth the price the price that I would pay Everyone keeps asking, what's it all about? I used to be so certain and I can't figure out What is this attraction? I only feel the pain There's nothing left to reason and only you to blame Will it ever change? 'Cause I am barely breathing And I can't find the air Don't know who I'm ki

Phenomenal Woman -poetry
Phenomenal Woman: Pretty women wonder where my secret lies I'm not cute or built to suit a fashion model's size But when I start to tell them They think I'm telling lies I say It's in the reach of my arms The span of my hips The stride of my steps The curl of my lips I'm a woman Phenomenally Phenomenal woman That's me I walk into a room Just as cool as you please And to a man The fellows stand or Fall down on their knees Then they swarm around me A hive of honey bees I say It's the fire in my eyes And the flash of my teeth The swing of my waist And the joy in my feet I'm a woman Phenomenally Phenomenal woman That's me Men themselves have wondered What they see in me They try so much But they can't touch My inner mystery When I try to show them They say they still can't see I say It's in the arch of my back The sun of my smile The ride of my breasts The grace of my style I'm a woman Phenomenally

Jet - Look What You've Done
Take my photo off the wall If it just won't sing for you 'Cause all that's left has gone away And there's nothing there for you to prove Oh, look what you've done You've made a fool of everyone Oh well, it seems likes such fun Until you lose what you had won Give me back my point of view 'Cause I just can't think for you I can hardly hear you say What should I do, well you choose Oh, look what you've done You've made a fool of everyone Oh well, it seems likes such fun Until you lose what you had won Oh, look what you've done You've made a fool of everyone A fool of everyone A fool of everyone Take my photo off the wall If it just won't sing for you 'Cause all that's left has gone away And there's nothing there for you to do Oh, look what you've done You've made a fool of everyone Oh well, it seems likes such fun Until you lose what you had won Oh, look what you've done You've made a fool of everyone A fool of everyone A fool of everyone

Friday, Don't Be Hatin'....
I'm glad it's Friday, damned glad. What I DON'T like is coming in to work only to find that one of my computers is suffering the blue screen of death, and will not let me work around it. Sooooo.... the salesperson will just have to hang tight while I run a repair, and hope to hell it clears up the problem. Sigh.... I had such high hopes for being productive today ;)

Hellyeah - Alcoholin Ass
A little bit of sunshine A little bit of booze A little bit of me And a little bit of you A little bit country A little bit of blues A slice of heaven And a little piece of you...come on Alcohaulin' ass Pour another drink in my glass Alcohaulin' ass Alcohaul...in' ass A little bit thirsty A little bit used A little bit of whiskey And a little pinch of chew A little bit tired And a bad attitude A little bit of drinkin And another piece of you Alcohaulin' ass Pour another drink in my glass Alcohaulin' ass Alcohaulin' Alcohaulin' You drove me to it So there was nothing i could do You pushed me down Split me right in two Now i found the long hard road Carried the weight of you Boy oh boy god damn Only one thing left to do Alcohaulin' ass Pour another drink in my glass Alcohaulin' ass Pour another drink in my glass Alcohaul...in' ass

Salata Mediterrian
2 green, yellow or red pepper, seeded and cut into 6 sections each lengthwise (two colors look better) 1 red onion cut into rings or quarters (rings will grill best but I prefer quarters) 1 Zucchini, halved and sliced into planks 2 large tomatoes cut into 8-12 pieces 1/4 cup olive oil 3 cloves chopped garlic 8 fresh basil leaves, chopped splash of balsamic vinegar (optional) no other vinegar works with it Prepare grill for one side to have indirect heat and the other to have direct heat. A charcoal grill works best for the tomatoes but gas will work too. Set tomato pieces on aluminum foil, drizzle with olive oil, add the garlic and basil. Set tomato mixture on the side with indirect heat. They will stay here for the whole process. Keep lid closed for the procdess except to check other veggies. Grill temp should begin at 275-300 F, do not add more coals. Grill the peppers over direct heat until the skin is blackened. Place them in a sealed PAPER bag or pl

Salata Caprese
8 leaves of basil 8 roma tomato slices 2 ounces mozzarella using a melon baller to shape into small rounds 2 ounces red onion coarse chop 1 oz olive oil 1 oz balsamic vinegar fresh ground black pepper to taste set the basil leaves on an 8" plate, place a roma slice on each basil leaf, set the mozzarella randomly around the plate, drizzle with olive oil and balsamic vinegar, season with pepper to taste.

Sunrise Asparagus
2 pounds asparagus 1/2 cup olive oil 1/3 cup lemon juice 2 ounces finely chopped red onion (optional: 1 tablespoon shredded parmesian cheese) This is a very healthy recipe, but one thing may stop you from enjoying it. If you ever eat asparagus, then you know that it often has a tough end. The question is: how do I prevent that nasty toughness from ruining a good veggie. If you take both ends and bend the stalk, it will snap at the point where the toughness begins. Then the tip will be free of that problem. I prefer to grill the asparagus but steamed works fine too. However you cook it, plunge it into ice water to quick-cool it. Drain it and set it up for presentation. Whisk half of the onion with the remaining ingredients and pour the dressing over the asparagus right before serving. Sprinkle the remaining onions over the top and serve.

Fruit Smoothie Generic Recipe
1/2 cup low-fat or non-fat yougurt 1 cup fruit juice 1/2 - 1 cup fruit pieces (preferably frozen) optional 1/4 cup nonfat dry milk powder Place all ingredients in blender and blend until smooth. Nutritional information (approximate depending on ingredients): Carbohydrates: 50-60 grams or 200-240 calories Protein 5 grams or 20 calories Fat: 0-3 grams or 0-27 calories Total calories: 220-287 other additions could be cinnamon or nutmeg and sweetener to taste.

My Favorite Salad
Good handful of fresh spinach 6 leaves of sweet basil, chiffonade or thin slice 1 roma tomato 2 oz. chopped walnuts 2 oz. dried cranberries 3 oz. ricotta or fresh mozzarella cheese black pepper to taste olive oil and balsamic (best) or red wine vinegar Just build salad and drizzel, pepper, oil and vinegar over the rest

Men's Health Smoothie Recipes
New Smoothie Recipes from Men's Fitness Magazine BRAIN BOOSTER SMOOTHIE The berries here aren't just super food for your brain; they offer an important cancer-fighting bonus. 1/2 c fresh or frozen blueberries 1/2 c fresh or frozen raspberries 1 c pineapple OJ 1/2 c low-fat vanilla yogurt 1 c ice BERRY BERRY SMOOTHIE Using all unsweetened fruit, this recipe delivers an antioxidant whallop without the sugar. 1/2 cup frozen unsweetened raspberries 1/2 cup frozen unsweetened strawberries 3/4 cup unsweetened pineapple juice 1 cup soy milk or 1% milk MEMORY AID SMOOTHIE This low-calorie smoothie is a good source of fiber, phytochemicals, and antioxidants. Blueberries in particular contain compounds that can help prevent cataracts, cancer, constipation, and memory loss. 1/2 c orange juice 1 pint nonfat vanilla or peach frozen yogurt 2 1/2 c sliced peaches 3/4 fresh or frozen blueberries MUSCLE BUILDER SMOOTHIE This mix fe

Uncreamy Garlic Dressing
3 TBSP olive oil 2 TBSP green onion or chives, chopped 3 TBSP red wine vinegar 1 TBSP garlic, minced 1 TBSP fresh or 1 tsp dried tarragon 1/2 tsp honey 1/2 tsp salt 1/8 tsp nutmeg Combine all ingredients and mix thoroughly.

Try Water
For a long time doctors have told us to drink 8 cups of water (1/2 gallon) every day. Now there is evidence that those 8 cups of water help a person look younger. Water has a crucial role to play in cleansing the body of unhealthy salt compounds that collect in the body. Even a little dehydration can cause problems with this function. The results: dry skin, increased deposits of toxins in the skin, wrinkles, loss of skin elasticity and even slower recovery from injury or sunburn. Drinking water also suppresses the appetite. You might say, "I don't feel thirsty" but your body is saying, "WRONG!" This dehydration is like any other bad habit. You get used to feeling a certain way, for you that becomes the norm. But once freed from that habit, you realize how much better you can feel. Try it for a week. Drink 8 glasses a day and see if you find any benefits. I think you will be pleasantly surprised!

Peppers Tear Me Up
About peppers causing heartburn Do peppers cause heartburn? Why do I have gas trouble after eating peppers? These are a few of the questions that today's science has answered. It is important to de-myth peppers for this reason: they are extremely nutritious! The red bell pepper is the most nutritious vegetable commonly found in your store's produce aisle. 1/2 of a red pepper equals a serving by the way. Also, those cultures that include higher amounts of peppers in their diets have the lowest rates of stomach ailments per capita. They suffer less stomach distress in general. Also the capsaisin found in all peppers seems to help comfort aching joints and muscles. All this considered, if you can include peppers in your diet, it is of great benefit. Do peppers cause heartburn? No. Most recent studies point to tobacco, alcahol, stress, sleeping on your stomach, eating right before bed or during the night and body weight as the mani culprits that contribute to heartburn. In fact, b

Hellyeah - You Wouldn"t Know
You couldn't be, you couldn't be me even if you wanted to, Everything I've been through. Live your life, soaking up all my sunshine, And smile your whole life, I wouldn't know 18 wheels are rolling, 18 wheels are crushing, Me down, Running me down Cars are crashing Cars are crashin, all around me Running me down, All my days are numbered, All my days are grey, All my skies are covered, All my ends are frayed, You couldn't be, you couldn't be me even if you wanted to, Everything I've been through. You wouldn't know Live your life, soaking up all my sunshine, And smile your whole life, I wouldn't know Lightning's crashin' Thunder's rolling all around me, Bringin me down Stars are falling, Fires lighting all around me, Burning me down All my days are numbered, All my days are grey, All my skies are covered, All my ends are frayed, You couldn't be, you couldn't be me even if you wanted to, Everything I've been through. You wouldn't know Live you

Death Is Tragic
I witnessed a death today. It was of the family bird named Fish (my sister named her that). It's weird because she was just fine yesterday. There was no signs of her being hurt or sick or anything like that. She just died out of nowhere. When I uncovered the sheets to the cage, I saw her on the bottom of the cage just lying there like she was ready to die. I picked her out of there and was trying to keep her warm (she was cold). I quickly called my sis and told her that she is dying. We did our best to keep her alive, but she ended up dying. I don't want to give any descriptions of how she died because it is just too difficult. Just seeing her made me feel like I couldn't do anything at all. I already lost another bird last week on friday as well. Death is so sudden and unexpected. Why now. It's just not fair.

Mee...
WASTED YEARS.. COLD There's a game life plays makes you think you're everything they ever said you were Like to take some time Clear away everything I've planned Was it life I betrayed for the shape that I'm in It's not hard to fail it's not easy to win did I drink too much could I disappear and there's nothing that's left but wasted years There's nothing left but wasted years If I could change my life Be a simple kind of man try to do the best I can if I could take the sides I'd derail every path I could I'm about to die won't you clear away from me give me strength to fly away There's nothing left but wasted years

Mee 2
WASTED YEARS... IRON MAIDEN From the coast of gold, across the seven seas I'm travellin' on, far and wide But now it seems, I'm just a stranger to myself And all the things I sometimes do, it isn't me but someone else I close my eyes, and think of home Another city goes by in the night Ain't it funny how it is, you never miss it 'til it's gone away And my heart is lying there and will be 'til my dying day So understand Don't waste your time always searching for those wasted years Face up... make your stand And realise you're living in the golden years Too much time on my hands, I got you on my mind Can't ease this pain, so easily When you can't find the words to say it's hard to make it through another day And it makes me wanna cry and throw my hands up to the sky

A Christmas Carol-the First Of The Three Spirits~
When Scrooge awoke, it was so dark, that looking out of bed, he could scarcely distinguish the transparent window from the opaque walls of his chamber. He was endeavouring to pierce the darkness with his ferret eyes, when the chimes of a neighbouring church struck the four quarters. So he listened for the hour. To his great astonishment the heavy bell went on from six to seven, and from seven to eight, and regularly up to twelve; then stopped. Twelve. It was past two when he went to bed. The clock was wrong. An icicle must have got into the works. Twelve. He touched the spring of his repeater, to correct this most preposterous clock. Its rapid little pulse beat twelve: and stopped. `Why, it isn't possible,' said Scrooge, `that I can have slept through a whole day and far into another night. It isn't possible that anything has happened to the sun, and this is twelve at noon.' The idea being an alarming one, he scrambled out of bed, and groped his way to the window. He was ob

A Christmas Carol-the Second Of The Three~
Awaking in the middle of a prodigiously tough snore, and sitting up in bed to get his thoughts together, Scrooge had no occasion to be told that the bell was again upon the stroke of One. He felt that he was restored to consciousness in the right nick of time, for the especial purpose of holding a conference with the second messenger despatched to him through Jacob Marley's intervention. But, finding that he turned uncomfortably cold when he began to wonder which of his curtains this new spectre would draw back, he put them every one aside with his own hands, and lying down again, established a sharp look-out all round the bed. For, he wished to challenge the Spirit on the moment of its appearance, and did not wish to be taken by surprise, and made nervous. Gentlemen of the free-and-easy sort, who plume themselves on being acquainted with a move or two, and being usually equal to the time-of-day, express the wide range of their capacity for adventure by observing that they are good

Hmmm
Ok i've been in here a few days now and am finally starting to figure some of it out. (FYI) Dial-up sucks in here. I really need to upgrade. Maybe after the holidays I will get around to that. I've found a few of my myspace friends/chat buddies in here and thank you all for adding me. Ok off to figure more of this out. You all have a good day!

Quotes
Never Give Up...Never Surrender -Unknown Life Is A Progress, Not A Station -Ralph Waldo Emmerson In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: it goes on. -Robert Frost Remember, no man is a failure who has friends. -Its a Wonderful Life Try not to become a man of success but rather try to become a man of value. -Albert Einstein Treat people as if they were what they ought to be and you help them to become what they are capable of being. -Geothe And even if you justify every bullshit lie, it still makes me want to break you -Godsmack When you come to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. - Franklin Delano Roosevelt. Perhaps our eyes need to be washed by our tears once in a while, so that we can see Life with a clearer view again. - Alex Tan. Some of us think holding on makes us strong; but sometimes it is letting go. -Herman Hesse Another turning point a fork stuck in the road Time grabs you

Lead, Follow, Or Drive A Pickup Truck!!
Can somebody explain to me why it is now fashionable to call or refer to one's self a redneck? it makes absolutely NO sense to me whatsoever. Is our country really this jaded? This is what Dictionary.com has to say about rednecks: red·neck (rid' nek') --> -->--> -->--> -->--> --> 1) Used as a disparaging term for a member of the white rural laboring class, especially in the southern United States. 2) A white person regarded as having a provincial, conservative, often bigoted attitude. In the days of yore, when I was but a pup, being called a redneck was comparable to calling an African-American a nigger, a Mexican a spic, or a Jew a sheeny. I see bumper stickers, screen-names, songs, etc. all touting their preference for Kentucky waterfalls. Only in a country this fucking twisted could Larry the Cable Guy be considered good. Are we so backwards as a race that we have to embrace all the negative qualities about ourselves? What about being a redneck woman makes G

New Kind Of Breast Cancer
Please pass on & keep women informed…. New kind of Breast Cancer - DO NOT DELETE Please forward to all of the women in your lives . Mothers, daughters, sisters, aunts, friends, etc. In November, a rare kind of breast cancer was found. A lady developed a rash on her breast, similar to that of young mothers who are nursing. Because her mammogram had been clear, the doctor treated her with antibiotics for infections. After 2 rounds, it continued to get worse, so her doctor sent her for another mammogram. This time it showed a mass. A biopsy found a fast growing malignancy. Chemo was started in order to shrink the growth; then a mastectomy was performed; then a full round of Chemo; then radiation. After about 9 months of intense treatment, she was give n a clean bill of health. She had one year of living each day to its fullest. Then the cancer returned to the liver area. She took 4 treatments and decided that she wanted quality of life, not the after effects of Chemo. She

Jokes
*Clean can be funny.* *********************************************************************************** One day, a man came home and was greeted by his wife dressed in a very Sexy nightie. 'Tie me up,' she purred, 'and you can do anything you want.' So he tied her up and went golfing. *********************************************************************************** A woman came home, screeching her car into the driveway, and ran into the house. She slammed the door and shouted at the top of her lungs, 'Honey, pack your bags. I won the lottery!' The husband said, 'Oh my God! What should I pack, beach stuff or mountain stuff?' 'Doesn't matter,' she said. 'Just get out.' *********************************************************************************** Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right, and the other is a husband. *********************************************************************************** A Polish immigrant went to the DMV to apply

Even Love Can't Mend By Srs
Even Love Can't Mend Written January 6, 1991 ***** I must do what is best for me. I will wait for love patiently. I must forget my past and wait for love that will last. I can't take a chance on unwanted romance. I must retain my sanity because that's what is best for me. I'm not the one to blame, but all my relationships are the same. I really shouldn't give a damn, but that's not the way I am. I cry almost every day when somone I love goes away. I must truly be insane because all my efforts are in vain. I'm scared to try again because I have a broken heart--- That even love can't mend! *******

Dancing In The Rain
Dancing in the Rain I love thunderstorms, and this is the third day in a row that it's rained here.I couldn't take it any longer.As the thunder rumbled in the distance, I walked out into the steady rain this afternoon. I held my face up into the stinging spray as it washed away my thoughts of heartaches and worries. I relived moments of my youth in those brief flashes between the drops. Rainbows glistened in my mind and the thoughts of youth flew past on sweeping wings, daring me to catch them, even if only for a brief moment... First grade...one of the rare days when I got to walk home by myself from school.I danced from one rain pool to the next, leaving each one muddied with my galoshes. I continued under the canopy of oaks down our street, finding worms drowning on the sidewalk. Have you ever noticed how much greener things look while it's raining? I checked out the underside of the leaves on the neighbor's grapevines, wondering if the vibrant green extended there...Then, I h

A Grand
An Australian guy decides to travel around the Greek Islands. He walks into a bar and Jill (the Australian Barmaid) takes his order, a Fosters, and notices his accent. Over the course of the night they get to know each other. At the end of Jill's shift he asks her if she wants to come back to his place and have sex with him. Although she is attracted to him she says no. He then offers to pay her $200 for sex. Jill is travelling the world and because she is short of funds she agrees. The next night the guy turns up again, orders Fosters and after showing her plenty of attention throughout the night he asks if she will sleep with him again for $200. Jill remembers the night before and is only too happy to agree. This goes on for 5 nights. On the 6th night the guy comes in,orders Fosters and sits in the corner. Jill thinks that if she pays him more some attention then maybe she can then shake some more cash out of him again, so she goes over and sits next to him. She

First Writing
All this quiet time One line of lonely words, No more strength in me My pain is simply unheard. Agony finely controlled Until that one line, A dam of pain unleashed These silent tears are mine. A breath stolen A heart shattered, A body weakened Bent and tattered. A love always pending Now no more complete, A lost and wounded spirit My soul accepts defeat. I walk a shadowed world Where nothing seems real, Where everything is a phantom Except this pain I feel. Anguish comes in waves Mimicing the oceans tide, I read your simple words And taste the tears I've cried. Gone but not forgotten My heart still feels for you, Living life in hell Always loving you.

What A Birthday!
Now that several months have passed, I can explain this story, it took a while to cool off. Aug 30 was my birthday And I didn't feel very well Waking up on that morning. Hoping my GF would be pleasant and say, "Happy Birthday!", And possibly have a small present for me, or at least some head before chores. As it turned out, She barely said good morning, Let alone " Happy Birthday." I thought... Well, that's a live-in relationship for you, But the boys at the barn... They will remember. They didn't say a word. So when I left for work, I felt pretty despondent. As I walked into my office, My secretary said, "Good Morning Paul, And by the way Happy Birthday ! " It felt a little better That at least someone had remembered! I worked until one o'clock , When she knocked on my door And said, "What do you say we go out to lunch, Just you and me." I said, "Thanks! Let's go !" We went to lunch. But we didn't go Where

Hot Chicks
chicks suck sometimes. They're all, uh, hot and stuff. Be wary, though, my friends. You can't tell 'em they're hot without getting smacked with a restraining order (or just plain smacked), you can't touch them without getting your ass kicked by every readily available male in the general vicinity, and you can't look at 'em without being uber sneaky, which makes one look like an uber-scumbag. They dress in a manner best described mildly as provocative, and then complain when being objectified. Are there actually women out there who appreciate being appreciated as a thing of beauty? If so, where my girls at?

Until We Meet
Until we meet My nights will be a little colder My days a little shorter My heart will beat a little less rapid Until we meet I know that my arms will be empty My mind hurting from the constant thought of you Minutes will seem to be hours Hours will seem to be months While months will seem like eternity Until we meet The stars in the sky will not affect me with its gleaming sparkles of life Until I am gazing at them in your arms And the food that I eat will not be as fulfilling and nourishing Until it is you that I share the my food with And Until we meet I will not feel whole My world will seem incomplete Until that wonderful day When our eyes make first contact And our bodies and souls collide in blissful whirlwind The words will roll off my tongue like a sweet love song "Hello, my love, I couldn't wait to meet you."

Shitty Shitty
FUCK BAKERSFIELD IS FUCKING SHITTY ASS HELL THERE ANT NEVER NOTHING TO DO HERE SHIT THIS TOWN SUCKS THERES HATERS LIKEE A MUTHAFUCKA FUCK MY HATERS NO WAIT THERE MY BIGGEST FANS HATEING ME WONT U PRETTY HAHA FUCK U HOEZ LMFAO GET KNOCKED OUT TRAMPS

Happy
With Thanksgiving upon us, I thought about all I have to be thankful for. I came to this conclusion life is a beautiful thing. Life is what you make out of it. Don't ever be afraid to go after something or someone you want. You will never know what it can turn into if you stay in the background. I should know because, I have stayed in the background alot but, not anymore. The new and improved Tonia is making her apperance. Watch out world because I am getting ready to make a impact that no one saw coming. There are alot of goals and dreams I want to make happen and I will.

Utada - Sanctuary Kingdom Hearts 2 Theme
wonk uoy naht niotceffa erom deen I In you and I there's a new land, Angels in flight wonk uoy naht niotceffa erom deen I My sanctuary, my sanctuary, yeah Where fears and lies melt away Music will tie Wonk uoy naht niotceffa erom deen I What's left of me What's left of me now I watch you fast asleep, All I fear means nothing In you and I there's a new land, Angels in flight wonk uoy naht niotceffa erom deen I My sanctuary, my sanctuary, yeah Where fears and lies melt away Music will tie wonk uoy naht niotceffa erom deen I What's left of me What's left of me snwod dna spu ynam os My heart's a battleground snoitome owt deen I wonk uoy naht niotceffa erom deen I snoitome owt need I You show me how to see, That nothing is whole and nothing is broken, In you and I there's a new land Angels in flight wonk uoy naht niotceffa erom deen I My sanctuary, my sanctuary, yeah Where fears and lies melt away Music will tie wonk uoy naht niotceffa erom deen I

Logic Of The Irish
Logic of the Irish An Irishman walks into a bar in Dublin, orders three pints of Guinness and sits in the back of the room, drinking a sip out of each one in turn. When he finishes them, he comes back to the bar and orders three more. The bartender approaches him and tells him, "You know, a pint starts going flat after I draw it. It would taste better if you bought one at a time." The Irishman replies, "Well, you see, I have two brothers. One is in America, the other in Australia, and I'm here in Dublin. When we all left home, we promised that we'd drink this way to remember the days when we drank together. So I drinks one for each o' me brothers and one for me self." The bartender admits that this is a nice custom, and leaves it >there. The Irishman becomes a regular in the bar, and always drinks >the same way. He orders three pints and drinks them in turn. One day, he comes in

101 Rules Of Black Metal..
1. Don't be gay. 2. Be "true". 3. All people who aren't "true" are gay. 4. Be grim. 5. Be necro. 6. Be simultaneously grim and necro if at all possible. 7. Break things while being grim and necro. 8. Don't have fun at concerts. Stand around with arms crossed. 9. Repeat all above while denouncing organized religion in any form. 10. Never ever, EVER under ANY circumstances... 11. ...Listen to Peccatum. 12. When someone asks you if you enjoy the music of Mayhem, point out that you only enjoy the music of "the true" Mayhem. Maniac is gay. 13. Don't play with fuzzy things, excepting that by "play" you mean "burn". 14. Don't be Dani Filth. 15. Never, ever, under any circumstances utter the phrase "Kenny G slams, man." 16. Don't be Dani Filth. 17. When your mom tells you to take out the garbage tell her that you're too metal to remove refuse. 18. Run for it! 19. Sodomize a virgin whore. 20. Sodomize anything that is not male. (Fuzzy things look out!) 21. Make sure your alb

Age And Perspective
Have you ever been guilty of looking at others your own age and thinking, 'surely i can't look that old. Well.. You'll love this one. My name is alice smith and i was sitting in the waiting room for my first appointment with a new dentist. I noticed his dds diploma, which bore his full name. Suddenly, i remembered a tall, handsome, dark-haired boy with the same name had been in my high school class some 40-odd years ago. Could he be the same guy that i had a secret crush on, way back then? Upon seeing him, however, i quickly discarded any such thought. This balding, gray-haired man with the deeply lined face was way too old to have been my classmate. After he examined my teeth, i asked him if he had attended morgan park high school. "Yes. Yes, i did. I'm a mustang," he gleamed with pride. "When did you graduate?" I asked. He answered, "in 1965. Why do you ask?" "You were in my class!", I exclaimed. He looked at me closely. Then, that ugly, old, bald, wrinkled,fat ass, gray

At The Pearly Gates
Einstein dies and goes to heaven. At the Pearly Gates, Saint Peter tells him, "You look like Einstein, but you have NO idea the lengths that some people will go to sneak into Heaven. Can you prove who you really are? "Einstein ponders for a few seconds and asks, "Could I have a blackboard and some chalk?" Saint Peter snaps his fingers and a blackboard and chalk instantly appear. Einstein proceeds to describe with arcane mathematics and symbols his theory of relativity. Saint Peter is suitably impressed. "You really ARE Einstein!" he says. "Welcome to heaven!" The next to arrive is Picasso. Once again, Saint Peter asks for credentials. Picasso asks, "Mind if I use that blackboard and chalk?" Saint Peter says, "Go ahead." Picasso erases Einstein's equations and sketches a truly stunning mural with just a few strokes of chalk. Saint Peter claps. "Surely you are the great artist you claim to be!" he says. "Come on in!" Then Saint Peter looks up and sees George W. Bush. Sai

My Heart In You....
My Heart In You In your heart you bind me And cut me to the bone. In your pain you spite me My life feels utterly done. Knife cuts deep and drain my life Blood lust is frenzied within you. Writhing on the floor alone My heart is all that you knew. Laid bare my soul it found you Sucked me in you did. None other shall ever own it I’ll forever keep it hid. Nights and days without your touch Pure agony for me now I now not what I can ever do To bring you back around. Cloaked and guarded your boys they hide you Keep you from your man. I’d gladly kneel before your out stretched hand and Bring forth my eyes your gaze. I’m but one man, loves chosen one For you to walk next to in life. To stand beside to hold forever I give you my love, my life. Deeply cut but not undone My love knows forgiveness and faith Your heart I won and want to come Be near you forever no pain.

Dream/awake
Dream/Awake Your blood drips from my lips Color of ancient wine. Magnitudes uncertain I’m blending into you. My vamp you take me into your lair Dissolve the bonds of flesh. I’ll take you there each night for day As light will guide my way. Suck you in you’re sweet as honey Nectar on my tongue. Into you I enter Now we’ve become one. Trust me, love me, spite no more Something’s on your mind. My Kitten, you’re master calls to you Come to me my love. I’ll work my charms, you work your magic Sentiments aside. Take you now and evermore You’re mine, My vampiric one....

Aglow...
Aglow with perspiration Sweat trickling to the ground, Your body shines with all the light My heart for you it pounds. The pillars hold you upon the sphere Eyes searching mesmerized yet calm, Your gifts they flow like torrid rains Out onto me all for one. Waiting searching hoping To hear your voice again, I reach for you I yield to you In you I must remain. Words will bend and turn and break Yet our friendship in us becomes, A long-lasting story of intimate glory One word among many more and none. Reaching out and finding faith Beyond our minds are numb, Asking for a way to heal Finding you I come. I’ve searched I’ve prayed For a friend as bright as you, Your soul it shines above them all And in me I am new.

Naughty Survey (thanks Ange)
REPLY IN A PRIVATE MESSAGE TO ME WITH YOUR ANSWERS. DON'T BE AFRAID. YOU NEVER KNOW WHO WILL REPLY OR WHAT ANSWERS THEY WILL GIVE. EVEN IF YOU HAVE A BOYFRIEND OR GIRLFRIEND OR HUSBAND OR WIFE - REPOST THIS! LET THE FUN BEGIN........ 1.Your Name: 2.Age: 3.Favorite position: 4. Do you think I'm cute? 5. Would you have sex with me? 6. lights on or off? 7. Would you have to be drunk? 8.Would you take a shower with me? 9.Have you ever thought about having sex with me? 10.Would you leave after or stay the night? 11.Do you like cuddling afterwards? 14.Condom or skin? 15.Have sex on the first date? 16.Would you kiss me during sex? 17.Do you think I would be good in bed? 18. Would you use me as a booty call? 19.Can I use you as a booty call? 20.Can we take pictures of the act? 21.How long would we have sex? 22.Would you tell your friends about me? 29.Will you post this so I can fill it out for you? SEE HOW MANY PEOPLE SEN

This Is Real Life.....
Dear friends and family, Prayers needs right away We have a real close friend Michelle, who’s daughter Alyssa a 2yr old beautiful little angel was severely burnt in a house fire The baby was trapped in her bedroom when a volunteer firefighter found her She was found lying on a bed in a smoke-filled room, "badly burned, but still breathing.” What we know right now is that it does not look good for Alyssa she is so badly burnt Please I ask of you to keep Alyssa her mommy and the rest of her family in your prayers Click here to go to the Charleston Daily News Artical

What's Your Bedroom Personality?
You have an Honest Bedroom Personality! You know what you want in bed and are very communicative about it with your partner. If they are doing something you don't like, you just tell them and move on. You have incredible sex because you are so honest with yourself and your partner about what you want. 'What's your Bedroom Personality?' at QuizUniverse.com

Jerks At The Holidays
Happy Holidays to all!!! I do question why is it that the people you care the most about choose this time of year to show there ass? Is it just my twisted life that some how invites every conceivable scrooge there is on the planet to show up this time of year? These people seem normal and rational all year long but as soon as it gets close to the Turkeys day the Holiday Jerks seem to come out of the wood work and the scary part is they are those nearest and dearest to you... Can one cancel on the Holidays and not look like the jerk because you seem to be the only sane one left?

Respect Me Or Get Gone
Soft Batch Ass Niggas wow i must write about niggas who dont get it why beg and constantly try to be apart of my life damm if i dont want you in in and pretty much tell you daily wouldnt you just get the hint my bad niggas just dont have common sense like most of the ones in my life do you see the picture i mean it and not in a good way. i hate a begging ass nigga of all shapes sizes and races all these goofy males who want instant relationship with someone who has a relationship already something is wrong with these people damm dude get it together mannnn up bitch just had to speak on something for a second to be continued heyyyyy back on this i hate repeating my self over and over again telling the same niggas the same shit and they like oh my bad wtf you mean my bad pay attention tape recorder is not on my body im bout to just start being more ruthless on these dumm ass people cause they trippen if i gotta say something to you more than three times and u still aint get it fuck it

Reality
Are you tired of those sissy "friendship" poems that always sound good, But never actually come close to reality? Well, here is a series of promises that actually speak of true friendship. You will see no cutesy little smiley faces on this card- Just the stone cold truth of our great friendship. 1. When you are sad -- I will help you get drunk and plot revenge against The sorry bastard who made you sad. 2. When you are blue -- I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you. 3. When you smile -- I will know you are plotting something that I must be involved in. 4. When you are scared -- I will rag on you about it every chance I get. 5. When you are worried -- I will tell you horrible stories about how much Worse it could be until you quit whining. 6. When you are confused -- I will use little words. 7. When you are sick -- Stay the hell away from me until you are well Again. I don't want whatever you have. 8. When you fall -- I will point and laugh at

Update For All
Dark Greetings, Yes I know I have been MIA for a good while as you can tell by the last post before this one. Well things have gotten hectic, first off my daughter has started Kindergarten & I have been volunteering at her school alot. The volunteering will last another month cause after five years of being an full time at home mom I am now rejoining the work force & I have been hired by the Board of ED so Next Monday I have an appointment for fingerprinting & TB Shot then on the 13th I have to be at the Board of Ed at 8am for a 3 1/2 hour orientation then get my ID card & Certificate to take to the schools for employment. So with that much of my online activities have changed. I have also been learning how to use PSP 9 using online tutorials plus my normal religious routines so yeah I have been swamped & with the holidays here I am drowning. I will probably have to drop out of my PSP yahoogroups once I start work cause the e-mails that one receives in those groups can be

Please Hear What I'm Not Saying
Don't be fooled by me. Don't be fooled by the face I wear for I wear a mask, a thousand masks, masks that I'm afraid to take off, and none of them is me. Pretending is an art that's second nature with me, but don't be fooled, for God's sake don't be fooled. I give you the impression that I'm secure, that all is sunny and unruffled with me, within as well as without, that confidence is my name and coolness my game, that the water's calm and I'm in command and that I need no one, but don't believe me. My surface may seem smooth but my surface is my mask, ever-varying and ever-concealing. Beneath lies no complacence. Beneath lies confusion, and fear, and aloneness. But I hide this. I don't want anybody to know it. I panic at the thought of my weakness exposed. That's why I frantically create a mask to hide behind, a nonchalant sophisticated facade, to help me pretend, to shield me from the glance that knows. But such a glance is precisely my salvation, my only

Christmas Likes
It is the holiday time and I got thinking about the things I like about Christmas. Food: Candy Canes, Fruit Cake, Tamales Drink: Egg Nog (With no liquor in it.), Hot Cocoa, Hot Tea Decorations: Items my kids make., Outdoor lights Shopping: The holiday decorations in the malls and stores. TV: "The Christmas Carol" (All versions.), College and NFL playoffs., Old school animated holiday shows. Films: "The Christmas Carol" (All versions.) Weather: Cool temperatures.

Ask Me How To Earn Xtra Xmas Money!!
Do you like candles? Want to earn money from home, with small start up costs (under $50) and umlimited income potential? Want to choose your own hours and own your own business? Then have I got an opportunity for you. I work with this great gourmet vegetable wax & soy candle company, and I'm making money and having a blast! And the best part is, it's so easy. If you'd like more information, e-mail me and I'll be happy to help! Chris ~ Don't forget to go to www.candeliciouscent.scent-team.com/index.php to enter the weekly drawing for a free 16 oz gourmet soy candle! ~ Chris Agostarola Independent Candle Consultant http://www.candeliciouscent.scent-tem.com/index.php Greenwiz Garden Club Memeber http://www.greenwiz.com.members/tweety22371/ UBIEE Enviro Project http://ubiee.com/enviro/?tag=argonaut http://earthmail.a-url.com?tag=3549

All Work No Play!
Well it has been a while that I have been on here so here is the update about me. I landed a Freelance writing Job through eHow.com, it's nothing to do with poetry but at least I am earning money for some of my writings! ;) It's nothing big, but at least it is something! Most sat there and kept saying that I spend all my time online and that I have no life, no job, well guess what I proved them wrong LOL! I haven't been feeling to well but I will get better. Nothing is far from the truth, when it comes down to those who seems to always lie through their tooth, but wait here in side this booth, no bend over and get ready to get the boot, Yeah that's right, for tonight I speak nothing but the truth! You dare to challenge me but yet you refuse to see, it's the legacy that is about to destroy thee! I will come on here ever once in a while, so till next time I wish you all a great week, and hope that you all had a great Thanksgiving! The legacy lives on! Through out the years T

A Leash Threw The Eyes Of A Submive.
I hold the leash in my hand, looking at with my eyes. I see what appears to be a plain ordinary dog leash. A leather looped handle on one end, clasp at the other and metal chain separating the two. It is not fancy, it holds no magic. It is simply a leash seen in any pet shop, not even expensive a mere $3.99 plus tax. As I hold the leash in the palm of my hand, I think of it, being attached to a collar around my neck. My blood runs cold as I think of the dog that would normally be attached to the clasp end. My mind grapples with the association, and my stomach lurches with a sickening feeling and yet an excitement stirs deep within me. I struggle to separate the emotions, to understand and accept my feelings. I know by my racing heart, that I wish to have this object attached to my neck and yet my mind struggles and rejects the concept. I sit there wondering about my desire to be attached to the end of a leash, being lead by Master. The picture in my mind is blurred and

No Title
Chapter 1 I was now totally and completely His, to do with as He saw fit. This was not only a sexual gesture. This meant to both of U/us that He now owned and controlled every aspect of my being, physically, sexually, emotionally, financially, and mentally as well. I had given my Master what I'd prized most in my former life, my free will, it was now His, and I was totally His. I finished conveying to Him how deeply I wanted and needed to be His possession. My eyes filled with tears and as I started to turn them downward again as an obedient slave does, I thought I detected a bit of watering in His loving eyes. when W/we met at the airport, all sense of normalcy seeped from me and I felt I was just butter melting in His arms. He lifted me to my tiptoes as He hugged me so tight and O/our first kiss was more than I had dreamed of. "Hello My slave," He whispered with his smooth even tone that in and of itself wasn't frightening, but when heard up close, knowing what this Man did

Submissive Woman
I find pleasure, joy, and fulfillment from being submissive to another in a loving relationship. I am not weak, or stupid. I am a strong woman, with firm views and a clear concept of what I want out of my life. I do not serve out of shame or weakness, but out of pride and strength. I look to my loving Master for guidance and protection, for never am I more complete than when he is with me. I know that he will protect my body, my mind, and my soul with his strength and wisdom. He is everything to me, as I am everything to him. His touch awakens me and his thoughts free me. Only in serving him do I find complete freedom and joy. His punishments are harsh, but I accept them thankfully, knowing that he has my best interests always foremost in his mind. If he desires my body for pleasure, I shall joyfully give it to him, and take pleasure myself from knowing that I have brought him happiness. However, the pleasure of the flesh is but one facet of any relationship. The love

Apples And Wine
Women are like apples on trees. The best ones are at the top of the tree. Most men don't want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt. Instead, they sometimes take theapples that aren't as good from the ground, but are easier to get. The apples at the top think something is wrong with them, when in reality, they're amazing. They just have to wait for the right man to come along, the one's brave enough to climb all the way to the top of the tree. Now Men.... Men are like a fine wine. They begin as grapes, and it's up to women to stomp the shit out of them until they turn into something acceptable to have dinner with. Share this with all the good apples you know.

Silent And Odorless
JOKE! A little old lady goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor I have this problem with gas, but it really doesn't bother me too much. My farts never smell and are always silent. As a matter of fact, I've farted at least 20 times since I've been here in your office. You didn't know I was farting because they don't smell and are silent." The doctor says, "I see, take these pills and come back to see me next week. â€The next week the lady comes back. "Doctor," she says, "I don't know what the heck you gave me, but now my farts...although still silent...stink terribly." The doctor says, "Good!!! Now that we've cleared up your sinuses, let's work on your hearing."

Deleteing My Account
Howdy All, Sorry I havent been in quite awhile, but I have lost all interest in this site. It makes MySpace look very intelligent. Too much Drama and BS here anymore. I will be deleteing my account Next week Monday, If anyone (who doesnt already have it) wants either my Yahoo or MSN messenger address just send me a PM and I'll get it to you. Have a Great week DvlDog91

What Is "sooner Magic"?
The term "Sooner Magic" was born on a cold and windy afternoon in Lincoln, Neb., in 1976 when the fourth quarter found the Sooners trailing the Cornhuskers 17-7. With three minutes to play, and the lead down to four, hope for a comeback had all but vanished into the Nebraska clouds. Oklahoma was stuck at the Husker 16-yard line when Woodie Shepard completed a 50-yard halfback pass to freshman end Steve Rhodes, whose catch was nothing short of miraculous. Two plays later, Rhodes ran a curl pattern and then pitched to halfback Elvis Peacock on the old hook-and-lateral. Peacock was finally knocked out of bounds at the Nebraska three. Peacock scored the winning touchdown on next play with 30 seconds remaining, vaulting the Sooners into a three-way tie for the conference championship. Further proof of the pixy dust that filled the air over Lincoln that day was the pregame prayer delivered in the Oklahoma locker room by defensive back and team captain Scott Hill at the behest of

Health Freedom Update
* Now for That Health Freedom Update Items in the news tell us where Health Freedom is threatened and championed: US Freedoms "HARMonized" To Restrictive EU Regulations: EU's Health Freedom Directive, Herbal and Medicinal Products Directive, Functional Foods Directive and a host of other European regulatory systems called "Directives" are rapidly and efficiently removing health choices for high potency nutrients, herbs, nutriceuticals and other natural health choices in Europe. In fact, President Bush recently signed an order to "HARMonize" the EU's regulatory system and the United States' in 40 areas, including food (remember, supplements are food under US law). As attorney Ralph Fucetola says, "the US is 'HARMonizing' our freedoms to Europe's restrictions", much to the glee of the multinational interests, including Big Pharma. Item: An unnamed source* says: "One American official says flatly that the EU is 'winning' the regulatory race, ad

Purina Diet
Yesterday I was buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for the puppies, Dallas and Smokey, at Wal-Mart and was about to check out. A woman behind me asked if I had a dog. On impulse, I told her no, I didn't have a dog, and that I was starting the Purina Diet again. Although I probably shouldn't, because I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms. I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry and that the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story.) Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no; I stepped off a curb to sniff an Irish Setter's

Little Boy Nick.....
One of Big Daddy Nick’s exes as told to me: oh yeah he can't keep his mouth shut he was always hoping for them to get back together but I couldn't put up with the relationship he had with his wife..that’s right he's still married and don't mention that I said anything...but the guy is a 30 year old loser.. who is sleeping on his married friends couch my guess is that your friend is pretty and gave him attention.. he professed his love to her...she didn't respond as much as he would have hoped...and he moved on to someone who was willing to move more quickly when his wife started sleeping around on him...he just kept taking her back..cause he wanted the whole family thing going on..dosen't matter who it's with

Blonde Joke
The other day my neighbour,who is a blonde,came running up my driveway jumping for joy. I didn't know why she was jumping for joy but I thought, what the heck, and I started jumping up and down along with her. She said, "I have some really great news!" I said, "Great.Tell me why you're so happy." She stopped jumping and breathing heavily from all the jumping up and down, told me that she was pregnant! I knew that she had been trying for a while so I told her,"That's great. I couldn't be happier for you!" Then she said, "There's more." I asked, "What do you mean 'more'? She said, "Well,we are not having just one baby. We are going to have TWINS!" Amazed at how she could know so soon after getting pregnant,I asked her how she knew. She said....(You're going to love his!) "Well, that was the easy part.I went to the chemist and they actually had a home pregnancy kit in a TWIN-pack and both tests came out positive!"

Sex And Calories(adult)
Giving .........head....... massages the jaw....while burning 32 calories. Swallowing foreign body juices is actually like taking vitamins and it whitens your teeth The American Dental Association says that semen cuts plaque better than mouth wash, so suck a dick and save a smile. Having nice sex burns 358 calories. Having rough sex [make it hurt] burns 543 calories. Take off her clothes with her consent.........................12 cal without......................187 cal Take off her Bra With two hands..........................8 cal With one hand.........................12 cal With mouth.............................85 cal Put on Protection hard .......................... 6 cal soft..........................315 cal Foreplay Looking for target...................8 cal Finding G spot ......................92 cal I don't Fucking care.....................0 cal Entry Holding her..................12 cal On the floor.................8 cal With Differ

Toilet Cleaning Instructions
Toilet Cleaning Instructions : 1. Put both lids of the toilet up and add 1/8 cup of pet shampoo to the water in the bowl. 2. Pick up the cat and soothe him while you carry him towards the bathroom. 3. In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and close both lids. You may need to stand on the lid. 4. The cat will self agitate and make ample suds. Never mind the noises that come from the toilet, the cat is actually enjoying this. 5. Flush the toilet three or four times. This provides a 'power-wash' and rinse'. 6. Have someone open the front door of your home. Be sure that there are no people between the bathroom and the front door.. 7. Stand behind the toilet as far as you can, and quickly lift both lids. 8. The cat will rocket out of the toilet, streak through the bathroom, and run outside where he will dry himself off. 9. Both the commode and the cat will be sparkling clean.

Stranded At Sea - (if You Know Any Fishermen, You'll Get This Even More)
Two fishermen were adrift in their rented boat due to an engine failure. While rummaging through the boat's provisions, one of the men stumbled across an old lamp. Secretly hoping that a genie would appear, he rubbed the lamp vigorously. To the amazement of the castaways, a genie came forth. This particular genie, however, stated that he could only deliver one wish, not the standard three. Without giving much thought to the matter the man blurted out, "Make the entire ocean into beer!" The genie clapped his hands with a deafening crash, and immediately the entire sea turned into the finest brew ever sampled by mortals. Simultaneously, the genie vanished. Only the gentle lapping of beer on the hull broke the stillness as the men considered their circumstances. One man looked disgustedly at the other whose wish had been granted. After a long, tension-filled moment, he spoke: "Nice going idiot! Now we're going to have to piss in the boat!"

Let It All Out.....
A lady walks into a high-class jewelry shop. She browses around, spots a beautiful diamond bracelet and walks over to inspect it. As she bends over to look more closely she inadvertently breaks wind. Very embarrassed, she looks around nervously to see if anyone has noticed her little accident and prays that a sales person doesn't pop up right now. As she turns around, her worst nightmare materializes in the form of a salesman standing right behind her. Cool as a cucumber and displaying complete professionalism, the salesman greets the lady with, "Good day, Madam. How may we help you today?" Very uncomfortably, but hoping that the salesman may just not have been there at the time of her little 'accident', she asks, "Sir, what is the price of this lovely bracelet?" He answers, "Madam, if you farted just looking at it, you're going to shit yourself when I tell you the price."

Missing Him
So I have had a wonderful boyfriend for the last 9 months 8 of those he has been deployed.In 3 more months I will see him once again.We are a little more than halfway done with this deployment and things are going great.I cant wait to have him in my arms again.

Good Enough
Good Enough Lyrics Artist(Band):Evanescence Under your spell again I can't say no to you crave my heart and its bleeding in your hand I can't say no to you Shouldn't let you torture me so sweetly now I can't let go of this dream I can't breathe but I feel Good enough I feel good enough for you Drink up sweet decadence I can't say no to you and I've completely lost myself and I don't mind I can't say no to you Shouldn't let you conquer me completely now I can't let go of this dream can't believe that I feel Good enough I feel good enough its been such a long time coming, but I feel good and I'm still waiting for the rain to fall pour real life down on me cause I can't hold on to anything this good enough am I good enough for you to love me too? so take care what you ask of me cause I can't say no

The Black Man's Manifesto For The New Millenium
I AM a Strong Black man and as such . . . · I will speak to women as human beings, not as potential sex partners, not as someone with less value than myself, not someone I must dominate in order to validate my manhood. · I will not plan out how I can get a woman into bed before I even introduce myself. · I will not judge a woman's beauty, worth or value by the length of her hair, the length of her fingernails, the roundness of her behind or the size of her feet, and most importantly, the color of her skin, just as I would not want to be judged by the length of my penis, the size of my wallet, the car I drive, or the amount of money I make. · I will make every effort to make sure women know that they are safe when they are in my presence. I will not touch, grope, or physically intimidate them and I will not make unwanted sexual advances towards them. · I will NOT strike, restrain, or threaten a woman. · I will accept that if a woman says no, she means she?s not in

U2 - The Hands That Built America
Oh my love, it's a long way we've come From the freckled hills to the steel glass canyons From the stony fields, to hanging steel from the sky From digging in our pockets for a reason not to say goodbye These are the hands that built America (Russian, Sioux, Dutch, Hindu) Oh, oh oh, America (Polish, Irish, German, Italian) Last saw your face in a watercolour sky As sea birds argue, a long goodbye I took your kiss, on the spray of Endless stars You gotta live with your dreams, don't make them so hard And these are the hands, that built America (The Irish, the Blacks, the Chinese, the Jews) Ah, ah ah, America / Hand (Korean, Hispanic, Muslim, Indian) Of all of the promises, is this one we could keep Of all of the dreams, is this one still out of reach Out ta outa reeeach (Dream-oh-yeah) (Oh oh-dream, oh love) It's early fall, there's a cloud on the New York skyline Innocence, dragged across a yellow line These are the hands that built America These a

Sarah Mclachlan - Building A Mystery
You come out at night That's when the energy comes And the dark side's light And the vampires roam You strut your rasta wear And your suicide poem And a cross from a faith that died Before Jesus came You're building a mystery You live in a church Where you sleep with voodoo dolls And you won't give up the search For the ghosts in the halls You wear sandals in the snow And a smile that won't wash away Can you look out the window Without your shadow getting in the way? You're so beautiful With an edge and charm And so careful When I'm in your arms Cause you're working Building a mystery Holding on and holding it in Yeah you're working Building a mystery And choosing so carefully You woke up screaming aloud A prayer from your secret god But you feed off our fears And hold back your tears, oh You give us a tantrum And a know it all grin Just when we need one When the evening's thin You're a beautiful A beautiful fucked-up man You're setting up

Twisted Lyrics . . . . Let It Flow
LET IT FLOW (Sung to Let It Snow) The weather outside is frightful, but the beer inside's delightful. And since we've no place to go, Let it Flow, Let it Flow, Let it Flow! Oh we show no signs of stopping, and now we're really hopping. And the lights are turned way down low. Let it Flow, Let it Flow. Let it Flow!! When we finally drink it dry, how we hate going back to the store. Maybe we'll just get high, and all fall asleep on the floor!! Oh the party is slowly dying. And our friends have all stopped buying. Now my bladder really wants to know. Where to go, Where to go, Where to go???

Twisted Lyrics . . . . Just Another Santa Rampage
JUST ANOTHER SANTA RAMPAGE (Sung to "Winter Wonderland") Drunken Santas, will be reelin. No pain will they be feelin! Red suits will be stained, from the booze that they've drained. Just another Santa Rampage!! You can tell, they've been drinking, Pretty soon, they'll be stinkin Drunk as a mule, with a beard full of drool Just another Santa Rampage!! Have you ever seen this many Santas? Stumblin and a' lookin like a fool? Don't you wish that you could be a Santa? Smokin and a' drinkin, being cool? Why we're out here, is Just Because! We are rebels, with a Claus. So grab a suit and beard. Come on and get weird Join us on a Santa Rampage!!

Twisted Lyrics . . . . We Are The Santa Rampage
WE ARE THE SANTA RAMPAGE (Sung to "We Wish You a Merry Christmas") We are the Santa Rampage, We are the Santa Rampage, We are the Santa Rampage, Now give us some Beer! We want some Beer Pudding, We want some Beer Pudding, We want some Beer Pudding, But we'll settle for Beer. We won't go until we get some. We won't go until we get some. We won't go until we get some. Have we mentioned the beer?!

Twisted Lyrics . . . . Here Comes Some Santa Claus's
HERE COMES SOME SANTA CLAUS'S (Sung to "Here comes Santa Claus") Here comes a Santa Claus, There goes a Santa Claus Right down Michigan Ave! Many are weaving, some are heaving, that ones missing teeth!! Amidst the red suited whirlwind, one flashed my girlfriend, That just doesn't seem right. But as they say, it'll be OK, Coz Santa Claus came tonight! (pelvic thrust at "came tonight", repeat line/thrust)

Twisted Lyrics . . . . Huff! The Nitrous Angels Sing
HUFF! THE NITROUS ANGELS SING (Sung to Hark, the Herald Angels Sing) NOS! The Herald Angels Sing Glory to the Whipped Cream King Peace on Earth and wah-wahs wild Suck it up in legal style Berkeley Farms and Redi-Whip Really gave us all a trip Lechter's sells 'em by the case Suck some down and lose your face NOS! The Herald Angels Sing Glory to the Whipped Cream King!

Twisted Lyrics . . . . The Twelve Drugs Of Christmas
THE TWELVE DRUGS OF CHRISTMAS (Sung with the 12 Days of Christmas) On the first day home for Christmas, my true love gave to me: A Tab of Yellow Sunshine LSD On the second day home ... 2 Hundred Reds On the third day home ... 3 Pounds of Grass On the fourth day home ... 4 Grams of Hash On the fifth day home ... 5 Valiums On the sixth day home ... 6 Joints of Smoking On the seventh day home ... 7 Whites a-Buzzing On the eighth day home ... 8 Spoons of Snorting On the ninth day home ... 9 Caps of dropping On the tenth day home ... 10 Peyote Buttons On the eleventh day home ... 11 Magic Mushrooms On the twelfth day home ... 12 Pints a-dripping

Twisted Lyrics . . . . Twelve Days Of Christmas
Twelve Days of Christmas (Sung with the 12 Days of Christmas) On the first day home for Christmas, my mother said to me: You haven't got a decent thing to wear. On the second day home ... You've put on some weight. On the third day home ... You should get a job. On the fourth day home ... Visit your Aunt Rosie. On the fifth day home ... Still no girlfriend? On the sixth day home ... What's that in your suitcase? On the seventh day home ... You smoke marijuana. On the eighth day home ... Ester has two children. On the ninth day home ... Are you still on food stamps? On the tenth day home ... Herbie's getting married. On the eleventh day home ... Your life is a disaster. On the twelfth day home ... Both of us still love you.

Twisted Lyrics . . . . Silver Shells
Silver Shells (Sung to Silver Bells) City sidewalks, bloody sidewalks, slick with holiday gore, in the air there's a smell of explosives. Children wailing, people screaming, as they run for their lives, from the gunman who has taken the store. Silver bells, shotgun shells, It's Christmas time in the city. Rink ka-chink, hear them ring, Today is your last Christmas day.

Twisted Lyrics . . . . Frosty The Cokehead
Frosty The Cokehead (Sung to Frosty, the Snowman) Frosty the cokehead was a crazed neurotic soul, With a big glass pipe and a vial of crack, And no sense of self control. Frosty the cokehead is an ubantale, they say, He is fond of snow but the dealers know That he came back for more each day. There must have been some poison in that last dime bag he got, For when he took his first big hit he dropped dead on the spot. O, Frosty the Cokehead Wanted to be as high as he could be And the dealers say He would pay and pay After he ripped off you and me. Frosty the cokehead doesn't worry anymore, Cuz when all is said, and your cold and dead, Then you never have to score.

Twisted Lyrics . . . . Deck My Balls
Deck My Balls (Sung to Deck the Halls) Deck my balls with boughs of holly, Fa la la la la, la la la. Tap the keg, inflate the dolly, Fa la la la la, la la la. Don we now our rubber panties, Fa la la la la, la la la. We're a bunch of twisted Santies, Fa la la la la, la la la. Naughty girls are such a treasure, Fa la la la la, la la la. These North Poles were made for pleasure, Fa la la la la, la la la. Fucked the elves, fucked all the reindeer, Fa la la la la, la la la. Fuck the cookies, bring us COLD BEER! Fa la la la la, la la la.

Twisted Lyrics . . . . Police Navidad
Police Navidad (Sung to Feliz Navidad) Police Navidad Police Navidad Police Navidad Prospero Año y Policidad. I wanna wish you a Merry Christmas You got the right to remain silent I wanna wish you a Merry Christmas From the barrel of my gun. Police Navidad Police Navidad Police Navidad Prospero Año y Policidad. I wanna wish you a Merry Christmas You got the right to remain silent I wanna wish you a Merry Christmas From the barrel of my gun. We Wish You A Merry Christmas (Revised)

Twisted Lyrics . . . . Chipmunks Roasting On An Open Fire
Chipmunks Roasting on an Open Fire (Sung to Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire) Chipmunks roasting on an open fire, Jack Frost ripping up your nose. Yuletide carolers being thrown in the fire, And folks dressed up like buffaloes. Everybody knows a turkey slaughtered in the snow, Helps to make the season right. Tiny tots with their eyes all gouged out, Will find it hard to see tonight. They know that Santa's on his way, He's loaded lots of guns and bullets on his sleigh. And every mother's child is sure to spy, To see if reindeer really scream when they die. And so I'm offering this simple phrase, To kids from one to ninety two. Although it's been said many times, many ways, Merry Christmas, Merry Christmas, Merry Christmas, Fuck you!

Twisted Lyrics . . . . We Wish You'd Get Out Of Our Way
We Wish You'd Get Out of Our Way (Sung to We Wish You a Merry Christmas) We wish you'd get out of our way We wish you'd get out of our way We wish you'd get out of our way In the parking structure Good tidings we bring To you and yours Unless you're in front of us At the cash register Repeat

Twisted Lyrics . . . . We Wish You A Merry Xmas
We Wish You A Merry Xmas (Sung to We Wish You a Merry Christmas) We wish you a Merry Christmas We wish you a Merry Christmas We wish you a Merry Christmas now bring us some beer! Refrain: Good tidings we bring to you and your kin; Good tidings for Christmas and we really do want some beer. Oh, bring us a frothy cold one; Oh, bring us a frothy cold one; Oh, bring us a frothy cold one; and some shots of good cheer Refrain We won't go until we get some, We won't go until we get some, We won't go until we get some, So bring some right here! (Repeat, repeat and repeat as often as necessary and with staunch determination until desired result is achieved!)

Twisted Lyrics . . . . O Come All Ye Perverts
O come all ye perverts (Sung to O Come All Ye Faithful) O come all ye perverts Come and have an orgy O come ye, o cum ye In brothels galore Come and get plastered And let's find some ho-girls O come let us enjoy them O come let us enjoy them O come let us enjoy them In brothels galore

Twisted Lyrics . . . . Wreck The Halls
Wreck the Halls (Sung to Deck the Halls) Wreck the halls with bricks and hammers Fa-la-la-la-la la-la-la-la 'cause we're so mad at the landlord Fa-la-la-la-la la-la-la-la Don we now our shrapnel jackets Fa-la-la fa-la-la la-la-la Get the weapons, let 'im have it Fa-la-la-la-la la-la-la-la

Twisted Lyrics . . . . White Christmas
White Christmas (Sung to White Christmas) I'm dreaming of a white Christmas, just like the ones I used to know. Where the tree stumps glisten, and the children listen, on cell phones for good deals on blow. Everybody knows, somebody with missing teeth. Piles of trash out on the lawn, tiny tots beaten black and blue, and Mama selling men her soul. Street gangs drive by and open fire, officer blue blows off your nose. And though it has been sad, many hours of the day, Scary Christmas to you.

Do We Really Want This In Our White House???
I have friends that worked for these people when they were in office once before and after watching this I hope you come to the same conclusion that most people have come too. Please watch. http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=7007109937779036019

Logic.
Two Rednecks, Jim and Dave, are sitting at their favorite bar, drinking Beer. Jim turns to Dave and says, 'You know, I'm tired of going through life without an education. Tomorrow I think I'll go to the Community College and sign up for some classes.' Dave thinks it's a Good idea, and the two leave. The next day, Jim goes down to the college and meets the Dean of Admissions, who signs him up for the four basic classes: Math, English, History, and Logic. 'Logic?' Jim says. 'What's that?' The dean says, 'I'll give you an example. Do you own a weed eater?' 'Yeah.' 'Then logically speaking, because you own a weed eater, I think that you would have a yard.' 'That's true, I do have a yard.' 'I'm not done,' the dean says. 'Because you have a yard, I think Logically that you would have a house.' 'Yes, I do have a house.' 'And because you have a house, I think that you might logically have a Family.' 'Yes, I have a family.' 'I'm not done yet. Because you have a

Inner Strength
Inner Strength If you can start the day without caffeine or pep pills, If you can be cheerful, ignoring aches and pains, If you can resist complaining and boring people with your troubles, If you can eat the same food everyday and be grateful for it, If you can understand when loved ones are too busy to give you time, If you can overlook when people take things out on you when, through no fault of yours, something goes wrong, If you can take criticism and blame without resentment, If you can face the world without lies and deceit, If you can conquer tension without medical help, If you can relax without liquor, If you can sleep without the aid of drugs, If you can do all these things, Then you are probably the family dog.

The Nuns And The Beer
THE NUNS AND THE BEER Two nuns were shopping in a food store and happened to be passing the beer and liquor section. One asks the other if she would like a beer. The other Nun answered that would be good, but that she would be queasy about purchasing it. The first nun said that she would handle it and picked up a six pack and took it to the cashier. The cashier had a surprised look and the first nun said, "This is for washing our hair." The cashier without blinking an eye, reached under the counter and put a package of pretzel sticks in the bag with the beer saying, "Here, don't forget the curlers."

The Silent Treatment / And Then Some
The Silent Treatment >> >> >>A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving >>each >>other the silent treatment. Suddenly, the man realized that the next >>day, >>he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning >>business flight. >> >>Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on >>a piece of paper, >>"Please wake me at 5:00 AM " He left it where he knew she would find it. >>The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM >>and he had missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and >>see why his wife hadn't wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper by >>the bed. The paper said, "It is 5:00 AM. Wake up." >>Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests. >> >>WIFE VS. HUSBAND >> >> >>A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word. >> >> >>An earlier discussion had led to an argument and >> >>neither of them wanted to concede their p

Famous Quotes
Sometimes, when I look at my children, I say to myself, "Lillian, you should have remained a virgin." -- Lillian Carter (mother of Jimmy Carter) I had a rose named after me, and I was very flattered. But I was not pleased to read the description in the catalog: "No good in a bed, but fine against a wall." -- Eleanor Roosevelt Last week, I stated this woman was the ugliest woman I had ever seen. I have since been visited by her sister and now wish to withdraw that statement. -- Mark Twain The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending, and to have the two as close together as possible. -- George Burns Santa Claus has the right idea: Visit people only once a year. -- Victor Borge Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint. -- Mark Twain By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you'll become happy; if you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher. -- Socrates I was married by a judge. I should hav

Questions On Science Tests By 5th And 6th Graders:
Answers to Questions on Science Tests By 5th and 6th graders: The spinal column is a long bunch of bones. The head sits on the top, and you sit on the bottom. * A city purifies its water supply by filtering the water and then forcing it through an aviator. * The inhabitants of Moscow are Mosquitoes. * It is so hot in some places that people there have to live in other places. * Momentum is something you give a person when they go away. * Mushrooms always grow in damp places which is why they look like umbrellas. * The four seasons are salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar. * The alimentary canal is located in the northern part of Indiana . * Thunder is a rich source of loudness. * Some people can tell what time it is by looking at the sun, but I never have been able to make out the numbers. * In some rocks you can find the fossil footprints of fishes. * When planets run around and around in circles, we say they are orbiting. When people do it, we say they are crazy

Flight From London
A Mormon was seated next to an Irishman on a flight from London. After the plane was airborne, drink orders were taken. The Irishman asked for a whiskey, which was promptly brought and placed before him. The flight attendant then asked the Mormon if he would like a drink. He replied in disgust, "I'd rather be pounced on and made love to, by a dozen harlots than let liquor touch my lips." The Irishman then handed his drink back to the attendant and said, "Me, too. I didn't know we had a choice!"

This Is Cool
fi yuo cna raed tihs, yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid too Cna yuo raed tihs? Olny 55 plepoe out of 100 can. i cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt!

A Christmas Story . . . How Viagra Saved Christmas
How Viagra Saved Christmas Oh, man. I am just not in the mood to do this whole Santa schtick this year. I've been busting my ass 24-7, riding those frickin' elves to crank out the toys and it's still never enough. Everybody wants a piece of me. Everyone just takes, takes, takes, but what about my needs? Do you have any idea how long since I've gotten some tail? Oh, nevermind, I can't even get it up anyway, I'm so exhausted all the time. Mrs. Claus has lost all patience and I've been sleeping on the couch since June. Well, here's the first stop on the Christmas Eve delivery route. I park the sleigh, and the elves help sort out the gifts. I always bring a trio of hot elvish babes to keep me awake on these all-night runs. Ginger, Cinnamon, and Pepper - I call them my Spice Girls - all with firm tushes and luscious breasts popping out of their elf suits. They're fun to look at, but tonight having them around is almost depressing, given my lack of libido. Down the chimney and into the h

A Christmas Story . . . Swinging Santa
Swinging Santa My friend Al wanted me to play Santa for the adults at this swingers party in a clubhouse. I'm not married or anything and I'm not crazy about having swingers sit on my lap so I told him to forget it. He said I was Scrooge. Anyway, Al never found anyone and, when the Big Night rolled around, he begged me to play Santa. "For a C Note," I told him and he forked it over. Anyway, I played Santa. It wasn't so bad. I had to sit on this hokey brass chair called "Santa's Throne" and Al told me it was solid gold. As if. And I had to hand out tequila candy canes and adult surprise gifts like dildos, rabbit vibrators, and sex gels. There was this blonde lady named Sandy dressed in green tights who played my elf. She was a dead ringer for Pamela Sue Anderson, I kid you not. She wore this hot green mini skirt and had on a little green elf cap. The whole time the members are crushing my lap telling me how much sex they want I'm staring at my elf's rock hard ass and her big juicy red

A Christmas Story . . . . Mrs. Claus' Secret Ingredient
Mrs. Claus' Secret Ingredient "That's it for this batch of Gingerbread Men," chirped Trixie the elf. "Shall we start on the Sugarplums, Mrs. Claus?" Santa's wife was gazing out the window of the Christmas cookie kitchen in the direction of her husband's toy workshop. "Mrs. Claus?" Trixie said again. "You seem distracted. Is something up?" "Oh dear," the woman said. "It's what isn't up that's bothering me." "I'm not sure what you mean," the elf replied. "Oh...fiddlesticks!" Mrs. Claus wrung her apron in her hands. "Can I tell you something confidential, woman to woman? Mr. Claus, he's been having, well, trouble lately. In the bedroom. "It's so embarrassing. I don't know what to do," she sighed. "I've tried to get him to see his doctor, but he just makes excuses. He says he's just tired, or worried about the toy orders. I've been patient, but I have needs too. I even went so far as to get myself one of those jackrabbit vibrators." Her already ruddy cheeks flushed deeper crimson

A Christmas Story . . . Sucking Santa (written By A Friend)
Sucking Santa I know it's probably terrible of me, but I've always had kind of a thing for Santa Claus. His long white beard and the way he laughs always sends waves of excitement directly to my dick. I know he's married to Mrs. Claus. But in my fantasies, he'll let anyone go down on his chimney. After all, Santa is known for being a very giving soul. It was about 4:00 a.m. Christmas morning. I woke up having to pee so bad I thought I was going to explode. I knew finishing off that six pack right before going to bed was going to come back to haunt me. As I headed down the hall toward the bathroom, I glanced over and saw someone standing in my living room. He had his back to me, but I could still see that the guy was in a Santa costume. "Who the hell are you, and what are you doing in my house?" I said, taking a few cautious steps into the room. I know I should have been scared - the guy might have a gun. But I was hoping even if he was here to rob the place, he'd at least let me

A True Christmas Story . . . Tranny Trouble (written By A Friend)
Tranny Trouble Now, I love Christmas as much as the next girl, but when you work retail in a mall, keeping up the holiday spirit can be a real challenge. The only thing kept me going this year was flirting with that hot department store Santa down on the first floor. I’ve always had a thing for the big daddy type, and he had such a cute smile. We had a little back-and-forth going for a couple of weeks, and I requested the closing shift on Christmas Eve to see if I could get him alone. I told him to meet me in an empty conference room upstairs, and stay in costume. He showed up right on time, plunked down in a chair and patted his knee. I obliged by sliding my bottom onto his lap and stroked the flannel and fake fur of his suit. “What’s your name, honey?” “Amy,” I told him shyly. “Amy, have you been a good girl?” he asked, as I blushed and nodded. “What would you like Santa to bring you, sugarplum?” His big hands gave my round ass a firm squeeze. “Santa,” I said, “Ever since I was a

A Christmas Story . . . A Christmas Blowing
A Christmas Blowing What better way to spend Christmas Eve than some hardcore action under the tree. Sure, does sound like a fine idea to me? This couple is doing just that and loving every minute of it as you can see. They were playing a little game together by dressing up in some holiday outfits. This hot looking babe was dressed in her sexy red lingerie and got to go first. Her boyfriend is playing Santa and she thinks this Santa is hot! She sat on his lap and told him what she wanted for Christmas. She told him all the goodies she wanted, all the time wiggling her sweet ass on him. She asked for the usual gifts jewelry perfume etc. Then she asked for something that really surprised him. She asked by getting on her knees and pulling his cock out. I bet not many Santa’s get asked if they want a blowjob! As you can see, it didn’t take this babe with very sexy lips to get them wrapped around his cock. She gave him the best present of all by stroking and sucking on his cock. By the gri

Twisted Lyrics . . . . Toys For The World
TOYS FOR THE WORLD (Sung to "Joy To The World") Toys for the world are made by kids And not by elves at all! We work them night and day For very little pay. And little tiny hands Make all your fav'rite brands That fill up the shelves in every shopping mall. Toys for the world that Santa brings So your sweet kids can play... What's underneath your tree Is our economy. And all those girls and boys Who make you're children's toys Are not getting squat from us on Christmas Day! They're not getting squat from us on Christmas Day!

Twisted Lyrics . . . . We Three Kings (of Petroleum Are)
WE THREE KINGS (OF PETROLEUM ARE) (Sung to We Three Kings of Orient Are) We Three Kings Of Petroleum Are Bearing drills we traverse afar Deserts, mountains, black gold fountains From Iraq to Anwar [Refrain] Oh-oh, OIL of wonder, Oil of might! We drill and plunder day and night Bombs and rockets fill our pockets-- We do what's wrong and call it right. [King George sings:] Born again, I gave up cocaine I stole your votes from Texas to Maine Pres'dent forever, ceasin' never O-o-ver y'all to reign [Refrain] [King Dick sings:] I'm Dick Cheney, look at me lie! When I smile, I make children cry No-bid contracts for my contacts-- Who needs an alibi? [Refrain] [King Karl sings:] I'm Karl Rove, I lurk in the gloom Encompassing democracy's doom Cheating, lying, leaking, denying All for us, none for you! [Refrain]

Twisted Lyrics . . . . Prison Cells
PRISON CELLS (Sung to "Jingle Bells" by J. Pierpont) It's just a traffic stop - for D.W.B. Then the cop plants drugs on you and busts you, 1-2-3. Or you could get popped - and if it's your third strike, You'll get life in prison just for jacking someone's bike! Oh... (Chorus) Prison cells, prison cells - don't you break the rules. We spend more on prison cells than we spend on our schools! Prison cells, prison cells - You'll be doing time. We'll lock you up for forty years and say we're tough on crime! Here comes the D.A. Watch him rig the game. He'll suppress the evidence that just might clear your name. You could still appeal, but you're bound to fail. Your court-appointed lawyer couldn't get Jesus out of jail! Oh... (Chorus) You'll be building toys. You'll be booking flights. We'll force you to work so just forget about your rights. We don't pay you much. You can't unionize. Prison labor really makes our profit margin rise! Oh... (Chorus) We

Twisted Lyrics . . . . Georgie Baby
GEORGIE BABY (Sung to Santa Baby) Georgie Baby, just slip some sanctions under the tree, for me, been an AWFUL good girl, Georgie Baby, so hurry down the chimney tonight! Georgie Baby, an oh-so-big gas guzzler too, light blue! I'll wait up for you dear, Georgie Baby, so hurry down the chimney tonight! Think of all the fun I've missed, think of all the brokers that I haven't kissed! Next year, my profits could be oh-so-good, if you check off my Christmas list! Georgie Baby, would you dissolve the EPA, OK?? They wreck my profit margin, Georgie Baby, Let's drill in Anwar today! Georgie Baby, one little thing I really do need, the deed! To a uranium mine, Georgie honey, so hurry down the chimney tonight! Come and trim my Christmas tree, with some juicy tax cuts for my company! I really do, believe in you...Let's see if you believe in me! Georgie cutie, de-regulate the coal industry for me No rules, just profits and glee! Georgie cutie, and hurry dow

Twisted Lyrics . . . . Carol Of The Bills
CAROL OF THE BILLS (SUng to Carol of the Bells) Closing Bell Rings! Fill your stockings! With Market Shares, Nothing we'll Spare! Capital Gains, Nothing Remains, For pension plans, wage earning clans Ding Dong, Ding Dong, that is our song! With Closing Ring, Profiteering! Ownership Race, we'll set the pace! Glee we reap from, Unearned income! Oh, how it pounds! Closing Bell Sounds! Through halls of gold, so Rich and Bold! Gaily it rings, CEOs Sing Songs of their gains. Free Market Reigns! Social Social Social Social Security Private Private Private Privatizing! On, the bell tolls, Divert Payrolls Our elite tones, Drown working homes. Closing Bell Rings! Fill your stockings! With Market Shares, Nothing we'll Spare! Capital Gains, Nothing Remains, For pension plans, wage earning clans Ding Dong, Ding Dong, that is our song! With Closing Ring, Profiteering! Ownership Race, we'll set the pace! Glee we reap from, Unearned income! Oh, how it pounds! Closin

Twisted Lyrics . . . . Rest Easy Wealthy Gentlemen
REST EASY WEALTHY GENTLEMEN (tune of "God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen" an English Christmas Carol) Rest easy, wealthy gentlemen, Let nothing make us sigh. We give our workers little crumbs So we can keep the pie. We pay off politicians So they bear our needs in mind And they line up to kiss our fat behind. If they're inclined, They line up to kiss our fat behind! Don't worry, wealthy gentlemen, Let nothing make us twitch. This new global economy's Designed to keep us rich. We write the laws in many lands - Let all their leaders come To bend down and kiss us on the bum. There's a good chum. Just bend down and kiss us on the bum! There's a good chum. Just bend down and kiss us on the bum!

Twisted Lyrics . . . . White Trash Wonderland
White Trash Wonderland (Sung to Winter Wonderland) Oh by the way, hey did you know Tomorrow night, we’re playin’ bingo It’s a beautiful sight we’re goin’ bowling tonight We’re walkin’ in a white trash wonderland We’re getting’ Hazel to make some eggnog In the fireplace we’ll burn a fake log We’re drinkin’ all day, then whizzin’ away We’re walkin’ in a white trash wonderland Joey’s home from the service And his girlfriend is getting’ nervous While he was at sea, she contracted VD They’re walkin’ in a white trash wonderland You can make an ornament from a Pabst can And then yous an hang it from the tree We’re callin’ Donnie up in Jail We’re raising money to post his bail Our neighbor is cranked and Uncle Jimmy is tanked We’re walkin’ in a white trash wonderland We’re walkin’ in a white trash wonderland We’re walkin’ in a white trash wonderland

Twisted Lyrics . . . . Sinful Wonderland
Sinful Wonderland (Sung To Winter Wonderland) Gone away...is the green weed Here to stay...is the mean weed We'll light up a bowl and pass it around Walking in a Sinful Wonderland If you dig...ecstasy-y Then come hang..out with me-e We'll roll in the snow I'll give you a blow Walking in a Sinful Wonderland In the meadow we will meet a dealer With coke and hash and all your favorite drugs Then we'll go and pop a couple speeders And hang around like a bunch of thugs Later on, we'll get higher As we (coke-sniffing sound) by the fire And then you'll get laid You won't have to pay Walking in a Sinful Wonderland

Twisted Lyrics . . . . Hark! The Drunken Santas Sing
Hark! The Drunken Santas Sing (Sung to Hark! The Herald Angels Sing) Hark! the drunken Santas sing Glory to the new-born King! Pissed on bitter and on mild, God and Santa reconciled! Joyful, all ye Santas, rise, drive your reindeer through the skies; With the sozzled host proclaim Santa’s born in the West End Hark! the drunken Santas sing Glory to the new-born King!

Twisted Lyrics . . . . O Come All Ye Santas
O Come all ye Santas (tune of O Come Ye All Faithful) O come, all ye Santas, Joyful and a bit drunk, O come ye, O come ye to Selfridges; Come and behold him, Born the King of Christmas; O come, let us adore him, O come, let us adore him, O Come, let us adore him, Sa - anta Claus. Sing, choirs of Santas, Sing in exultation, Sing, all ye citizens of Sa - antacon; Glory to Santa In the highest; O come, let us adore him, O come, let us adore him, O Come, let us adore him, Sa - anta Claus.

Twisted Lyrics . . . . The Twelve Days Of Christmas
The Twelve Days of Christmas (Sung to Twelve Days of Christmas) (remembering to emphasise 5 double gins, as in 5 golden rings) On the first day of Christmas my true love bought for me: A lager for 99p On the second day of Christmas my true love bought for me: 2 rum and cokes and a lager for 99p ... On the twelfth day of Christmas my true love bought for me: 12 Tequila slammers 11 Hundred Pipers 10 Shots of Absinthe 9 Remy Martins 8 vodka tonics 7 Cheap dry sherries 6 Bacardi Breezers 5 double gins 4 Smirnoff Ice 3 real ales 2 rum and cokes and a lager for 99p

Twisted Lyrics . . . . Oh When The Santas Go Marching In
Oh When the Santas go marching in (Sung to Oh, When the Saints Go Marching In) Oh when the Santas go marching in All wearing red and drinking gin You’d better step back Mr Shopper Oh when the Santas go marching in

What Kind Of Santa Are You?
you are one Naughty Santa. Your Santa suit is no doubt skimpier than all the rest, you are prolly sexy though I'll give you that... You're fave catch phrase this year will be "Come over here and sit on me lap" What kind of Santa are you? brought to you by Quizilla

Film Fridays - Saving Lives Is Sexy
Film Fridays - Saving Lives is Sexy Sexy French maids show you how to preform CPR... sort of... well, at least how to make out with your friends! LOL That was a condom in her mouth! Seriously though, it is very important to learn how to preform CPR correctly- you never know when a lover (or fellow orgy attendee) might be counting on you to save their life.

The Facts Of Love/life - Outta The Mouths Of Babes
'To have a baby the mother has to lay an egg then the mail (male) cracks it.' Absun aged 8 'If you dont want a baby you should practise contradiction'. Lyn 9 'If you put a man and a woman in bed together one of them will have a baby.' Paul 6 'Josephs wife Mary had a immmaculate contraption.' Tom 7 'If you want to have a baby, go to the library.' Pierre 6 'A baby comes out of the the mummys tummy and bites the doctor and the doctor smacks it.' Edward 6 'I nearly know how to have a baby but we don't do it til next term.' Francis 7 'To have a baby you have to make love to someone who doesnt mind.' Shelley 7 'The man next door has a baby in his tummy but it never comes out.' Alistair 9 'First of all you get in love, then married and get a baby. Or you can do it the other way around.' Peter 9 'Its easier to have a baby if you are a cat'. Paul 6

This Guy's My Hero!
Dublin Beer Bandit Raids Guinness Nov 30, 6:20 AM (ET) By SHAWN POGATCHNIK DUBLIN, Ireland (AP) - Irish police were hunting for a beer bandit who stole 450 full kegs from the Guinness brewery - the largest heist ever at Ireland's largest brewer. National police said a lone man drove into the brewery - a Dublin landmark and top tourist attraction - on Wednesday and hitched his truck to a fully loaded trailer awaiting delivery to city pubs. Diageo PLC (DEO), the beverage company that owns Guinness, said the brewery had never suffered such a large-scale theft before in its 248-year history. Police said the raider took 180 kegs of Guinness stout, 180 kegs of U.S. lager Budweiser and 90 kegs of Danish beer Carlsberg. Guinness brews both of those foreign brands under license for sale in Ireland. Police declined to say whether the theft had been captured by closed-circuit surveillance cameras. No description of the suspect was issued, suggesting that nobody got a good l

3 Men
Subject: Three men Three men - a Canadian farmer, Osama bin Laden and a South Dakota farmer are all working together one day. They come across a lantern and a Genie pops out of it. "I will give each on you one wish, which is three wishes in total", says the Genie. The Canadian says, "I am a farmer and my son will also farm. I want the land to be forever fertile in Canada ." POOF! With the blink of the Genie's eye, the land in Canada was forever fertile for farming. Osama was amazed, so he said, "I want a wall around Afghanistan , Palestine, Iraq and Iran so that no infidels, Americans or Canadians can come in our our precious land." POOF! Again, with the blink of the Genie's eye, there was a huge wall around those countries. The South Dakota farmer says, "I am very curious. Please tell me more about this wall." The Genie explains, "Well, it's about 5,000 feet high, 5oo feet thick and completely surrounds the country. Nothing can get in or

Bubba
Bubba went to a psychiatrist. "I've got problems. Every time I go to bed I think there's somebody under it. I'm scared. I think I'm going crazy." "Just put yourself in my hands for one year," said the shrink. "Come talk to me three times a week, and we should be able to get rid of those fears." "How much do you charge?" "Eighty dollars per visit, replied the doctor." "I'll sleep on it," said Bubba. Six months later the doctor met Bubba on the street. "Why didn't you ever come to see me about those fears you were having?" asked the psychiatrist. "Well Eighty bucks a visit three times a week for a year is an awful lot of money! A preacher cured me for a $10 donation. I was so happy to have saved all that money that I went and bought me a new pickup!" "Is that so! And how, may I ask, did a preacher cure you? Did he lay his hands on you?" "Nope, he told me to cut the legs off the bed! - Ain't nobody under there now !!!" Git 'er dun!!!!!!!!!

After Making Love We Hear Footsteps...
After Making Love We Hear Footsteps... For I can snore like a bullhorn or play loud music or sit up talking with any reasonably sober Irishman and Fergus will only sink deeper into his dreamless sleep, which goes by all in one flash, but let there be that heavy breathing or a stifled come-cry anywhere in the house and he will wrench himself awake and make for it on the run—as now, we lie together, after making love, quiet, touching along the length of our bodies, familiar touch of the long-married, and he appears—in his baseball pajamas, it happens, the neck opening so small he has to screw them on and flops down between us and hugs us and snuggles himself to sleep, his face gleaming with satisfaction at being this very child. In the half darkness we look at each other and smile and touch arms across this little, startlingly muscled body— this one whom habit of memory propels to the ground of his making, sleeper only the mortal sounds can sing awake, this bless

On Being A Lovingmaster
I made this decision long ago. My 'play' is of a loving and caring nature, more sensuality than Sadism. I know I don't fit the mold, even with the large size and stern demeanor. Simply stated, my heart is not really in beating women. Discipline for bad behavior, and willful disobedience? Yes, as corrective measure only, as training tool. "Board of Education" style communication, if you get my meaning. I get my greatest joy from delivering multiple orgasms to My woman. I get a great deal of satisfaction from bringing about experiences for them that they have never had. I LIVE for fantasy fulfillment, both My own and hers. I have recently had the opportunity to seek a new partner. Several of these potential partner subs were put-off by my gentle nature. They wanted a stern and demanding Dom, one who will objectify them and abuse them, keep them in their place, etc. While I get no real pleasure from doing these things, it has occurred to me to modify my approach, and open mys

Pitt Whipped Some Wvu Ass!
Welp this is my first blog and I just had to get on here and blog about WVU getting there ass's beat by PITT. I'm an OHIO STATE fan and I can't stand WVU. Just glad to see them loose and no chance of playing with us big boys in the bowl. Now I'm off to make my Buckeyes to take to work with me Monday morning. (I WORK IN WEST VIRGINIA) rofl.. God I am so mean!

Embarrassing Moments
EMBARRASSING MOMENTS Have you ever spoken and wished that you could immediately take the words back...or that you could crawl into a hole? Here are the testimonials of a few people who did.... I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three kids in tow and asked loudly, "How much do you charge for a shampoo and a blow job?" I turned around and walked back out and never went back. My husband didn't say a word... he knew better. I was at the golf store comparing different kinds of golf balls. I was unhappy with the women's type I had been using. After browsing for several minutes, I was approached by one of the good-looking gentlemen who works at the store. He asked if he could help me. Without thinking, I looked at him and said, "I think I like playing with men's balls." My sister and I were at the mall and passed by a store that sold a variety of candy and nuts. As we were looking at the display case, the boy behind the counter asked if we needed any help. I

Racism
One Race: Human Race The idea that humans can be divided into seperate races is a common misconception. Scientist have proclaimed that there is no such thing as "race". Having different colour skin makes you no more a seperate race than having different eye colour or hair colour. Genetically, we humans are all the same species. The only thing that makes us different colours is the amount of melatonin in our skin. Race is a myth that is told in order to seperate us and turn us against each other. * There are no characteristics, no traits - not even one gene - that distinguish all members of one "race" from all members of another. We are all related.

The Water
It calls to me Today is the fourth day of pouring rain Yet I am trapped Trapped in fear Trapped in a room trapped within my thoughts I seek to wade out into the water until I can breathe again I seek release I seek an end

Have Children? Grandchildren?? Or Know Of Someone Who Does??? If So, Do I Ever Have A Website For You!
Have Children? Grandchildren?? Or know of someone who does??? If so, do I ever have a website for you! Hi! I'm Stephen Hall from Teatcket, Cape Cod ,Massachusetts! Cape Cod, Massachusetts??? Wow! I am a Magic Kids Distributor. Magic Kids sells quality name-brand children's clothes at up to 90% off of retail prices! 90%??? Wow! They've been in business since before the internet and have done well. Dresses for as little as $2.32, boys and girls five-pocket denim jeans for as low as $4.50. $4.50? Wow! In fact that's a Double WowWow! The prices are so low that they're practically giving the stuff away! You don't have to look anywhere else, this childrens clothing is the lowest priced anywhere! Anywhere??? Yes! ( bet you thought I was going to say Wow, didn't you?) Didn't You??? Wow! Here's the link: http://www.magickidsusa.com The discount code is MK43323. Log in, then enter the code. It's that easy. Then you'll receive promotional em

With Winzy Search, You'll Get Great Search Results And Many Chances To Win Great Prizes!
With Winzy Search, you'll get great search results and many chances to win great prizes! EVERY SEARCH COUNTS As a registered Winzy member, you earn points just for searching. Each point you earn is a free entry into our monthly Grand Prize drawing. You can win up to $100,000 In addition, each search is a chance to win great prizes instantly! We are giving away Apple iPods, Amazon Gift Certificates and iTunes Gift Certificates. GOT FRIENDS? Invite friends to join Winzy. If they sign up through your Winzy invitation link and win a prize, you win thehttp://www.winzy.com/tweety22371 same prize! HAVE A WEBSITE OR BLOG? We have Winzy buttons you can add to your website, blog, or forum signature. We also can give you code to add a Winzy search box to your site. If somebody searches through your search box and then wins ahttp://www.winzy.com/tweety22371 prize, you win too! WANT FAST ACCESS TO WINZY? Make Winzy your Home Page or Search Winzy from any website wit

Pros And Cons
What are the pros and cons of online relationships? What are the points of these relationships? I never really understood them. How can you have a relationship by spending your time online and chatting? Granted it is a great way to get to know someone without speaking face to face but what happens when you do and everything is not what it seems? Of course any kind of dating could be like that but are you not taking more of a chance with online dating? How does that person act out of his or her environment? Are they telling you only what they want you to hear so that they get you in a trap? I was lost in one of these so called relationships when I realized how stupid they were and that I couldn't trust the guy. The Love word is used to lightly anymore and I don't trust many people anyway. He was actually telling other girls he loves them too so what are you suppose to believe? thank god I am in a good relationship now but I can't believe anyone who says they love me online LOL sorry pe

Christmas Video: Fucking Santa
Fucking Santa: Santa is cumming & cumming & cumming to town! A young slut wife is featured in this comedic interracial sex story. A fucking by Santa is her husband's special present. This sexy slut gets a Christmas Eve, and Christmas Day, visit from Santa Claus. And we got it all on video!!! "This is some really funny, sexy stuff," a video editor said upon reviewing this interracial sex story before its release. Be prepared! Ho ho ho! Or is it: Hoe hoe hoe? Fucking Santa opens in the daytime on Christmas Eve when Santa Claus arrives at producer Michael's home to be greeted by young slut Kathi and husband Paulie. As the old bearded man comes in, our sexy slut gets a kiss and a "Merry Christmas" -- and they follow Santa upstairs to a bedroom. Paulie grabs a seat nearby to watch his sexy slut in action. Santa (Matt) pats his lap and tells our young slut to come to him and have a seat. Santa points out that she has been a very bad girl this year, and in fact is on his

Lip Print
Lip Print You may think of me as silly, and it's a little thing to most I keep the glass you drank from the last time you were here the last time we had a toast. I don't clean it not in the least you see it has this lip print on the rim that does soothe this beast. I bring it out on special occasions that's every night to me, I gently place ice in the bottom then pour our favorite wine carefully. Holding it up to the light to gaze upon your lip print so sensuous, and full my eyes brim then water, becoming a pool. I place my lips next to where yours had been inhaling the fragrance of your essence and sipping the wine, so slowly you'd think it a sin. Lighting a candle and listing to a favorite song, I rock my body with an unseen partner, where my white dove had been, now gone. carefully placing it far to the back not to be misused I'll bring it out again when I feel my heart to be abused. Thinking of you softly not believing you have flown still holding my hear

Red Wine And Blue Lipstick
Red wine and blue lipstick Painted lips of blue are cold upon her face too unpredictable to smile a frown upon her lips I sat and gazed upon her face so aloof and frozen in its place I had some red wine and offered her a drink she took the wine and took a sip I looked away and felt a chill had wine added color to her cheeks I turned and looked again at her warmth surged like a sea on one soft word love leaped between our eyes that met wine had colored her lips a purple hue

Anberlin - The Feel Good Drag
I'm here for you she said and we can stay for awhile, my boyfriends gone, we can just pretend. Lips that need no introduction, Now who's the greater sin, Your drab eyes seem to invite (tell me darling) Where do we begin. was this over before? before it ever began? Your Kiss Your Calls Your Clutch Like the devils got your hand This was over before Before it ever began Your Lips Your Lies Your Lust Like the devils in your hands Everyone in this town is seeing somebody else Everybody tired of someone our eyes wander for help Prayers that need no answer now I'm tired of who I am You were my greatest mistake I fell in love with your sin Your littlest sin was this over before? before it ever began? Your Kiss Your Calls Your Clutch Like the devils got your hand This was over before Before it ever began Your Lips Your Lies Your Lust Like the devils in your hands Failure is our disease You broke my heart, my joy You brought my greatest failure

Touch
How can you ache and crave for someone's touch When you have never felt it? I do this for yours, though, And the yearning grows more each day I have never wanted anything in my life As much as I want you When you whisper such sweet love In my ear when we talk You make me melt into a puddle Of complete helplessness You have become my every waking thought And my every dream at night I breathe in so hard Trying to catch my breath when we can't talk I close my eyes so tight Hoping when I open them you will be there But I know I have to wait Until the time is right It seems so far away That I think I am losing my mind I want to breathe in your scent And keep it with me all day long I want to taste your love for me By kissing your sweet lips I want to feel your body next to me So when you leave for awhile I can hold on I just want you to know That I really do love you When the day comes and we are together You will alway

Playtime
...Stay... ...So we can play... ...All day... ...And all night... ...Please don't fight... ...My love center's so tight... ...Aching for you... ...Let's try something new... ...I'll keep on my shoes... ...Crawl on hands and knees... ...Twist you up in the sheets... ...Leave you no breath, just a wheeze... ...You must... ...Trust... ...In this lust... ...Let's make our own show... ...Get the camera, a video... ...Don't hold back, let it all go... ...Suck on my heels... ...Make me squeal... ...Devour me as if I'm your last meal... ...Baby... ...Tell me... ...What you need... ...Wanna bite at my lips?... ...Want me to crack the whip?... ...How bout my juices, want a sip?... ...Lemme give you a tip... ...Lay your tongue softly on my clit... ...Wiggle it just a little bit... ...Feel my back arch?... ...My mouth's dry and parched... ...Soon the explosions start... ...Makes my insides burn... ...Next it's your turn... ...Think you can handle me?... ...Oh t