Fubar Blog Posts 3

Family Is So Very Important To Me And Life As Families Are Not Just Your Own Blood Its We Are All Family Together In This World
Thoughts of Mother visions ,walking through Mist of Child's World When a mother ,first gives Birth to a child ,we hold so many fears our selves and at same time filled with complete Happiness that out shines with Pride . Our child creation of Part of me As a Mother I shine through out all this Tiny Person's Life Feeling Life is completely Perfect Nothing could ever go wrong All I have to do is offer complete Love to this Tiny Person ,laying in my arms . As this child ,Grew up over years I could hear the mockery ,spoken back to Their own Mother . Yes ,your so proud of Me ,mom in all things I created in My own Footprints in sand . Your still there when you should not be there . You still speak words of being Proud of me when you should not . Words spoken to me as Mother Mom you hold no reason to be

Always Time To Learn To Live
CONFUSED AND DRAINED ENERGY Do you know feeling of holding a Energy Deeply inside you . You were born with ,the deepest extremes ,to find that you will live your life out ,not being able set a part of self free and able that energy to flow excessive through out your entire body . A energy that reflects a big part of peace and balance through out spirit that reflects all points of energy . To Limit that growth that flow of energy is completely wrong for anyone to ask or limit or for themselves to lock away for another way of thinking ,to live a life without expressing yourself is wrong in ,producing energy an releasing energy . To be told daily to just be yourself how can you just be yourself when your unable to allow all energy to be set free within own body . Living in a relationship that is confining and limited in areas of energy that a person knows not just believes although knows ,they were born certain manner ,then depressing that energy as locking

Without Knowin G Yourself ,you Never Find Magick
Without energy, there is no life. Without energy, there is only death. We all understand that in Every romantic relationship contains the risk that you start depending on the energy provided by your other half, rather than creating and generating a sourcing through your own energy yourself. Relax and sit back to Reflect for a moment on this term: “your other half.” You need not depend on someone else to become a whole person. You can not Live through another person's creation or life's experiences ,most important thought should be -You can be complete by yourself. You don’t need an “other half” before you can be happy and productive. First learn to be a complete person by yourself. If you’re a woman, learn how to activate your masculine energy, and if you’re a man, activate your feminine energy. Only by balancing yourself and sharing your own completeness can you aspire to make love last forever. We all seem to be searching for that Lif

Can Not Allow Hurts Go Unhealed
HURTS UPON HURTS IN FOOTPRINTS IN THE SAND THAT NEEDS TO HEAL You love each other but can’t manage to communicate without arguing, fighting and ending up exhausted, each one in his corner, trying to lick your wounds and thinking of how to protect one self against a new attack. And in spite of that…you love each other? How is this possible? Why do people hurt most those they love? How come we can’t express our love? How come we are full of good intentions but when it comes to reality we find ourselves again shouting and blaming the other one. And then that monster of guilt jumps out of nowhere to our throat to strangle us once again. We all need energy. We need energy to live and to survive. Energy comes in many forms : love, attention, interest, food, friendship, money, approval, recognition… We all need this to feel good, to build our personality and to find our place in society. Hurts creates Hurts Drains E

Older Or Younger
people make excuse's alot of the time when it come to either gender or age you can't help who you are attracted too they either think there family will disown them or there friends well turn there back i see it like this if your family or friends cant understand then they dont need to be in your life if they make alot of issues about the matter at hand specially when it come to age range just because your either younger at the age of 18 or older does not make them any less of a person or for you not to be attracted to them i see no problem in age at all its all about how they treat you and if they know when it is ok to be immature and to be mature about the matters at hand and there personality not there looks but whats in there heart

Update To Trust No One
i thought I'd been through a lot of shit with my friends, but nothing the likes of this. Those of you who read this should know that my bff Zoey is writing this blog on my behalf. I asked her to. There are two pics in my pictures of my exroommate Ben, who our family invited into our home and our trusted family circle. I will never know why but one night he just decided to take our lives and rip us apart with ONE phone call..... .. .. You see, Ben wasn't man enough to fight his own fight maturely. Zoey was talking to Ben calmly about a matter and Ben lunged at Zoey. I thought he might try to hurt her, so I defended her. She broke it up before any kind of a fight broke out, but Ben decided he would do everything he could to hurt us. He called the cops on me and had me arrested, and I have been in jail for almost 5 weeks now. .... .. .. People....be careful about who you allow into your haven from the world....your home. You can think you know someone, but they can turn on you

My Story
encase of someone of are asking why i re posted this it was because i change a few things and really took the time to really re do everything that has happen to me in my past to let it go also giving you a little insight to me as a person.let me start this out by saying iam not looking for someone to pity me or feel sorry for me i don't need my ego stroke come to think of it i don't got one but anyways.iam use to rejection after all my mother rejected me and i feel my father did too and the worst thing is i don't no way nor do i care any moremy father grew up with his dad but his dad never show him affection and me and him act way to much a like if you put us together in a room alone we would more then likely kill one another in fact i took my sword to him once before and mind you the man is 6ft6 iam not really sure on how much he weights tho and he is buff just go to show you i don't back down from no one.as for my mother like i said she rejected me when i was born she was 16 when she

Micheal Jackson
Uqqhh... sooo...heres what I think Okay so while the quy was alive nobody qave a rats ass about the fact that he clearly had a fckinq problem. He abused prescription medicines, he was millions of dollars in debt.No one cared ; readinq more and more about him, no one cared to help him. All the people around him, enabled him. Buhh thats besides the point.. WHY is it, when someone dies they become this heroic, great person!? --When in reality, they weren't.

Just Need One Bloody Minute
guys i am saying oh my god, have you noticed the pik on my profile? oh my god```got milk? need some imagination, i found that pik on a amazing place lol and i would like to appreciate some big beautiful ladies dancing in front of me without anything dressed up better shaking their beatiful meat.i mean in the video.wat i need to do is sitting at my laptop and imaging nice bxxbs.well i recommend you the place with those drooly BBW video and piks http://www.plusflirt.com free to join lol .C'MON```

Failure
Failure by USPS is noted and a contact is made. I'll make sure I'll never get it. When you find it you'll have to force me to accept. The Cup Red White Friends wanted or not must be Present Clear Passage is a FAILURE Surgery failed due to a stupid man and a woman. rest is just the past mr. post master

The Voice
"The Voice" I hear your voice on the wind And I hear you call out my name "Listen, my child," you say to me "I am the voice of your history Be not afraid, come follow me Answer my call, and I'll set you free" I am the voice in the wind and the pouring rain I am the voice of your hunger and pain I am the voice that always is calling you I am the voice, I will remain I am the voice in the fields when the summer's gone The dance of the leaves when the autumn winds blow Ne'er do I sleep thoughout all the cold winter long I am the force that in springtime will grow I am the voice of the past that will always be Filled with my sorrow and blood in my fields I am the voice of the future, bring me your peace Bring me your peace, and my wounds, they will heal I am the voice in the wind and the pouring rain I am the voice of your hunger and pain I am the voice that always is calling you I am the voice I am the voice of the past that will always be I am the voice of your hunger and pain I a

Who Will Win
I wonder who will win? The fight is between Mike and Norio. Norio is very weak, frail, and filled with doubt. Mike has no doubt, certain, and absolutely corrupt. Norio will always give of himself for the sake of others. Mike will use any and all for self gain. Norio seeks the Face of God and The Righteousness of God over himself. Mike is against God and seeks absolute power which corrupts absolutley. Norio is light while Mike is dark. Mike will always over power Norio for self presevation. Perhaps Mike has already won while Norio must let go completely and stop fighting the inevitable. Mike is nothing but TMO and The Brotherhood. Norio always did belong to God. ?

All
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Home
Welcome home Mike! D tells me I'm morbid but that's what Herman T tells me too and that's what he always writes even though he wells up in tears. I'm a little stern so I did not well up. 6:30 to 8:30 was a nap and wouldn't you know it some things are disconnected. My harsh and laughing Critic why will everything not be able to sustain itself? Iran is mentioned and we are above and below it? Why do we have Secret Installations in Saudi Arabia? Why do we have Classified Installations for the dignataries in mountains? 1, I believe is in West Virginia. Are you invited? Will any even get there as put down according to the forsaken plan? Wonder about God. Mike is apparently here to stay and I say give it your best shot Mike. Norio

Reflections
This couldnt be any more true! A mirror simply reflects the face,Of what others quickly see.It will never clearly show,What is deep inside of me.Yet, as I walk amongst the world,Where wise eyes seldom snooze.My true reflection is clearly shown,By the friends that I choose.

Late Last Year
My last hospitalization at the VA late last year was very different than ever before. Overdose of 1260 units of Insulins Novalog and Humalog is deadly and yet the lowest my blood sugart went was 69. Experinec other than that can be considered paranormal. Father Oppothelio or something like that, that prayed over me and gave me the annoiting I learned the day I left, from Father Michael that he has been dead for six years since he replaced him. I am volunteered against my will to be a Secretary for the Morning Community Meeting and using the proper method I inquire about the very fundamentals of welfare of my fellow patients. I and others were rushed out of there. While there I refuse my night medication and the very next moring someone coming to me to give me my morning medication for what ever reason does not see me. I was laying on my back minus my PJ's due to my room mates bad aim at the toilet. Satying that position at any length of time I'm like numb from this fall I had in Stonyb

Angel
dear diary kunt spoke to an Angel last night, she said there is hope for me yet, but she remains at a safe distance...... and i remain here sorry for how i talk to you diary, always calling you a kunt, and whore.... which you are a kunt/whore you should clean up your life too diary... whore!

The Word "pervert" Used 2 Often.
What makes a person a pervert in your eyes?...It is 300% fact that one can only be a pervert if its a 18 plus adult that like underage children sexually. there is no such thing as a adult to adult pervert. if a guy say, "Let me see your tits" Then thats not a pervert. thats all part of being a man. thats as natural as you breathing right now. if a lady says id love to see you cock then that's not a pervert, that's part of being a female, Duh!!!...we were meant to like each other sexually as adults. this word "PERVERT" is thrown around way to much & to loosly. Sure you can choose to listen to it or not & that it your right, but it still does not make the one talking sexual a pervert, It just makes them :HUMAN"...Let me repeat myself...A PERVERT IS A ADULT THAT LIKES UNDERAGE CHILDREN THAT IS UNDER THE AGE OF 17.NO SUCH THING AS A ADULT TO ADULT PERVERT. So get a Grip Uptight People.

D&fun
D says go home and have fun. Fun, like hppiness is a state of mind. It is a emotion. What is it sexually that is forbidden that someone like me has an intreest because of the Vista that is given to me? It does not go against any laws of man? Why would I turn my back on God? God is the only driving force. Not in trinckets or any simple feeling but something much greater that no cook out, party, or what ever one can come up with that falls on the darkness? Your the Fall, so figure it out. Fun

This Guy
I went to Target for whatever reason and this guy, I would think he worked there says, that's the gut that's dying. I thought to myself, yes I am and so are you and everyone else and everything. Million years from now only thing to retain its character is glass which is liquid. So over all what did I say if anything here? Don't know who is the Critic? What is this all about any way? No, I'm not angry about dying. Something else and I want all to present themselves for a group picture with me. Yes, Critic your counted. A to Z. Join The Order yet?

Restless
Some are getting restless over my failure to proceed to surgery. The price is another 10 to 15 years? Why not, 100 to 150 or better yet, eternity? Add, endless money and best sex with all the beautiful ladies at same time forever. I figure, if it aint broke, don't fix it but I'll brake some where, because such is life and has to end some place. One place is good as any. Norio

Afraid
No, I am not afraid of death or life and not even the surgery. I have two appointments next week and I will discuss not only my position but the possibilities. I did notice the lot of people know about me or of me but rare is the one that knows enough to truly sympatize. Catch me with more than a hey when I walk by and who knows you may find that I still am a very nice guy, good guy, and Gentleman. The military, all I did was file and type and nothing more. I have to wonder now that my filing system is so copmlicated that I can't find squat and typing is usually one finger and some times two. Norio

Easy
Easy, The Cup is The Holy Grail or a Vessel. Red Whine means The Blood of The Master for The New Covenant. White Wine is the The Water, The Gospel, or The Word (sigular). Friends wanted or not is The Brotherhood. Clear Passage is very plain. Do not interfere. D, says I can have it all. Thank you for clarifying everything. I have two PIN's? Others are looking for something I am not. Whatever I find is mine. Yesterday it was 150k, today a set price, and tomorrow it will not be worth anything. Soon it will be time to take a break. norio

Up Up And Away!
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Read Or Pick Up
Yesterday at the car wash I met FOP sitting and waiting for hes GMC Tan pickup and I suppose hes wife or girl friend came out. Could be something more but is it possible to read or pick up others thoughts? Today an appointment with Herman T. and we talked but I lead the conversation to who beside myself had the most to gain. He said the hospital, doctors, and I persisted to what one individual beside me? It is possible to have blockage cause the dammage but he knew way back when that this is a Passive Homicide on the part of a physician due to Hypoglacemia. No, kind mentioned in the Insulin Manufacturers litterature does not say Insulin induced coma but low blood sugar which causes temporary to permanent damaga to the Heart and the the Brain. Herman T. said keep lifting those weights and he is right. Herman T. is the one that guided me and it was John C. who also guided me to defend myself against the VA. Others here and there helped. Surgery, I could of died or simply disappeared int

Mia Coupa
Every one knows what mia coupa is and coup de tar? I will see if Herman T. understood and if my physicians are paying attention. Norio couldn't handle it like he once did. Nothing wrong with it. Tomorrow I will test medicine and see if there is any salt? Time to completely take over. wemoveforwardtelemitsuandsashwillhaveherpositionalongwithsheritaallisatthetablebutme salt

Welcome To The Psyco Circus...
Hello all! I would like to welcome you to my page. I'm new here and still learning the ropes so I hope you will hang in there with me while I experiement and get things just the way I like them. I will be posting stories, poems, etc. I wrote them all. I hope that you will respect that and not copy them. It's the same respect I will have with your things. I want to hear from you. Your comments, questions, suggestions, etc. Here I will reveal things about me that not many know. My wants, desires, fantasies, etc. If you ask me a question, I will honestly answer here. So, welcome to the Psyco Circus... I'll be here to be your guide... We'll reveal the secrets that we hide inside... Welcome to the show!

11:15
11:15 Hrs. is show time, tomorrow. My sister went limp because I heard everything her husband Edward J. Knorr III said in the back ground. Perfect hearing the military gave me. Telemitsu, I am ready to sit at the table. Get on my Right. Master's and The Saint's are dead silent. I intend to hurl today and yesterday into the future. Who else but a certain physician has the most to gain than me because of her stupidity it created this mess. Others merely went along because it was good place to dump me. This house is worthless but the occupant has a bounty. A Man of God came looking for me. A common man that works hard for hes living as a Licensed Electrician. Thought something happened to me. I gave him a very brief explanation of what. He Prayed for me. Show Time is Tomorrow, Thursday the 8th at 11:15 AM. ?Norio?

Much Better Off Of
I feel much better off of Coreg. It caused all of the symptoms of Heart failure as did Remron and Tramadol, those two I went off of it too quick but there was a serious need to do that.Today I will agree to the surgery. What else if anything belongs to God. I will try to remain open and passive so as not to have any appearnce by me to influence any thing. N

Resilient
Often I am resilient and were I not so I would of been done at the beginning. One either bounces back or stays forever down. Nothing wrong with staying down and often the choice is not yours to make. That decision may belong to God. Jo-Ann says how resilient I am or how stupid I am to even consider a come back of any kind, that's what I often feel. I told my Cardiologist that there is no reason for me to stay but there is no reason not to stay. In either case I gave up to a part of myself. I gave the go ahead for the surgery and currently taking a different med. for my Heart. Coreg for whatever reason was not good to me. Norio

Should Be
This should be obvious that I am communicating with another through here. Why this change for me about this surgery? I had to wait for another to catch up would you think? Any axe to grind from me had to be dealt by me from influencing my decisions. To remain passive and unemotional is very difficult. Chracter trait on my part? Who knows? Does me no good to have this surgery and to stay in this world but just the same were I to leave, still no good. Ultimately any Glory from whoever goes to God alone. Often I am religious and at the same time by reading here and listening to me, anyone will get a false impression of me, that I am the opposite. Perception belongs to you alone and it is colored by self deception. This deception is on your part. It comes from life experience and what you accept as any truth of value. Join The Order yet? Remember, Rosicrucian Order AMORC in San Jose, CA or on the net. Read and if intrested try it with an open mind for three months. Will you learn anythi

Done Deal
Surgery is a done deal meaning a success. I may fail. Mike cannot exist. I'm told I will succeed, however, I will fail. No help in any way. This is on me. Codded messages are sent out to? These are the friends I do not want, however, will face. Any one understand The Master's or The Saint's? Why is the Roman Catholic Church, The Holy Roman Catholic Church. Aliance? Guide? God? The Christ? Brotherhood? Resistance? Who or what are we resisting? Freedom? Liberate? Oppresed? Questions and doubts with Mike taking control. Norio

Let Go
God forbid that I'd be able to let go. So D, it is almost impossible for me let go and just be a kid again. Any reaction and this includes silence from anything I place here or at myspace hits the nail on the head. Reaction is noted. Long time ago I had to grow up real quick. That is hard enough but the US ARMY was the final work that finished me. To this day I am not sure of exactlu what I did. To wake up this morning at 5:30 and then wake up close to 9 leaves me wondering, did the sleep catch up with me or was I doing something else. If I wake up in a strange bed or a strange woman or a woman I already know next to me in my bed. Well, that's the stunner isn't it? Interesting to note that I have an appointment with the surgeon in Haddonfield rather than Vorhees. Norio

Caution All Around
Caution all around unless they make a mistake. Why is this? My sister is no longer on the wireless because she now knows I hear everything. She is very cautious. Gary is also very cautious in not only what he says but the format. No longer is it in WACHOVIA's. Physicians are very careful in what they say and one was even in tears over the phone. Someone I should of not met, just met, too far from where their supposed to be. Beauty is remarkable from her to this one. Had to be same or perhaps I was seeing a twin? Nothing in the attic. Three other places remain? Unfortunately, I know exactly where, why, how, and when to look. Perfect year for surgery 9, moth 10, and Holloween? Perfect. and ABCDdcba means? I will not teach, figure it out. PAX

What Do You Think Bout Me?
POST THIS IF YOU AREN'T SCARED TO SEE HOW PEOPLE THINK OF YOU... 0 = ewww!?! 1 = Definetly not attractive... 2 = Decent... 3 = Cute... 4 = Fine as hell!!! 5 = I'd do you... 6 = Pretty damn sexy!!! 7 = Lovable,I LOVE YOU!!! 8 = I wanna make you mine

Done The Same
Coming out of Shoprite onto Delsea I made a left on a green light or Arrow but as I did so lit my smoke and the Glassboro Police Officer followed me for awhile before peeling off. I would of done the same myself at a distance. Simply I was outrageous to do a stunt like that and never was I or anyone else compromised. The traffic was very light and hardly any rain. I cruised up to 43 in a 45 zone and down to 32 in 35 and never went past 29 due to traffic. Light was Yellow before I ever got to it and slowed and stopped. The officer did the right thing. Had he followed me into the next town it would become harrassment. No, it is not anything beyond that. Thinking about things I have to go back to what I said few months ago. No one person or entity is at fault with all that happened to me regarding my Heart or Aorta, however, Stonybrook is a different story. First is the ice, second is the Super, third is the Owner, and fourth but not the least are the attorney's that told me a whole lot

Question Everything
As I started in The Order a charge was given to me. This charge was very simple and difficult. I was charged to question everything. To this day I question and try to find the simple truth. I had to question the fact, can someone like me justify existing in this world. I fought hard with my own prejudice and came up with, if I colud not justify my existence or life, how can I for any one else? I have to be able to live just for me and to balance things out with life which often seems not to have any reason and yet a purpose. I told Joe this morning of my decsion and he is right. Next time I see him I could of already had this surgery. I had to fingt my self doubt and replace it with God. When I recognized God as The sole reason and purpose, then I knew a purpose for me being justified by God alone. Norio

Understand
I understand what it is to bring today and yesterday into the future. I doubted making Christmas and thought in a block of three months. Come to imminent. I question making the surgeons appointment. Unique sensation as I slow down. Time and space almost cease to exist. 30 minutes to get to Joes and 20 for hair cut and another 30 to come back but I can only account for thirty minutes out of it all. Where was I, who drove and talked. Who interacted with this world. Auto pilot, that's it? Fluid intake is third and output is half or less. Appetite is much less and the need to fill that is also much less. I sleep much longer and deeper preferring the fetal position over any. Everything continues as life continues and I'm interested to know this God who does not have emotions like us. What is this veil we are so scared of? Material things are what I have and they stay here while my memories and what I know goes with me. Let the Judges decide what happens to my material goods as they decided

Unique And Time Is Accounted For
Sensation is very unique but the time is accounted for because I'm paying attention to what is going on as I drive and far as Joe, without the distraction he's done in 10 minutes. I was the first customer and only one for awhile. No, I never went like this more passive to reflect and feel it rather than sudden. That being said Joe came up with it. He wants the hair to grow, fast, and thick so he can make more money. Just like medicine isn't willing to admit there is a cure for everything. Their going to milk it, like crude oil and gasoline. I just gave you the biggest welfare systems. With out it, who knows they'd say we have no need for all of us? No need but to fill the money account. With or without going to die any way. Will I get there this coming week? Who knows, who truly knows as goddess T always said and what a Beauty. She still haunts me, pain. I like it when her young boyfriend is pissed and hangs up on me, otherwise she's Cool or Hot and So beautiful. Make up not needed. T

Chapter One: St. Louis
Chapter One: St. Louis I thought I was going to miss my train again...that would be typical. Last time I got wasted and ended up spending the night in Oklahoma City because I got caught up in watching some kind of freestyle BMX ballet competition. Oklahoma fucking City! What a nightmare. The train was already moving and picking up speed when I hopped on. I slumped into a seat in the front of the car next to an elderly Asian woman with a startling amount of facial hair. Maybe she was a sex change case, who knows. "Keep your hands to yourself young man", she grumbled as she clutched her bag to her chest. Guess she didn't like the looks of me. I closed my eyes and thought about how pissed off my asshole of a roommate, Penis, was going to be when he came around and realized I took all the smack with me when I left. Thats Penis, pronounced Peh-ness by the way. An interesting guy to say the least, his parents named his sister Vagina (rhymes with Regina). No wonder they'

Cowboy
Cowboy at the WAWA with hes lady, nothing personal your not worth the time or the effort to go through. Your lady, no interest. Ambulance went East on 322 as expected. I can barely walk due to the Heart? CNS is what's causing that. Damage is to the Heart, Brain, and other organs. Yes, I'll make the appointment but any surgery I highly doubt. Nothing personal, no interest here or any place else. Norio

Say This And Do That
I say this and do that and nothing should be noticed by me and there are ripples in what has become normal for my life. There should not be any effect at all. Why is there? Who has the most to gain beside me but the hospital and doctors but there is another? Does not matter at this point in my life. Just salvage as much as I can and try to proceed as I see fit at the moment. I do come up with the statement or the action to throw any but if they hold on, it becomes obvious why. I myslef don't know what I'll say or do and the significance of it until much later. I think, oh, I get it now. Fixed the expanded rear door. Shaved it down. Tried the new handset but decided to keep the old. One heck of a time trying to use the new long scres and there is a reason. Different manufactures use different screw settings. Down by Lowes and tried them and the guy seemed astute said the same. I also see what other things need to be done. Norio

Good News With Mixed Blessings
I received good news with mixed blessing from the meeting with my surgeon. What does this mean? Very simple and right now I am not willing to go public with it. In the future I may but not right now. Time to think and reflect and also assess all that took place not just today but the past. Someone said you should be partying. You know what time is coming for us to party. Like we used to. Norio

Mp3
The mighty Mp3 players can not only write audio but pic and video. Some have the ability to capture the sorrounding with microphone, in my heavy shirt pocket buttoned down that I kept off of me because it was rather warm in the office in Haddonfield. Surgeon refused to do the surgery unless I quit smoking for three weeks which prompted me to ask, what about those that come in thorugh 911 and other emergency? He said then we have to. January and February it was a Triple By-Pass with a Miatric Valve replcement with metal or flesh from a cow with the AAA stinted later turns into a Double By-Pass with the VA doing the unneccesary aftercare. Memory Card is no longer in my position. I don't know why? My oh my. A little lie here and there. Suddenly everything comes into perspective. Later, Norio

Dream Girl
Dream GirlI dream about her at nightI see her during the dayI love her i know is rightBut how to tell her I can not sayOnly if I couldI would tell her trueThen I know she wouldTell me "I Love You"One touch from her burns meLike the heat from a fireThat Flames up within meKeeps my temperture raising higherThe kiss of her lips sends meAll the way into outerspaceWhen I look at her I seeThere's nothing more beautiful as her faceSo if you ask me, I'll tell you She is the only one I love so true.Brad A ChristopherCopyright ©2007 Brad A. Christopher

Heavenly Angel
Heavenly AngelOne second with you is a minute in heavon One minute without you is a hour in hell Just being with you Ifeel well within You are my heavonly angel When we hold hands my soul burns with desire First time we kissed all I heard was a bell Just to be near you fills my heart with love You are my heavonly angel I sit alone and wonder why Wonder in confusion if I fell When you are close I can't help but laugh You are my heavonly angel You are the best thing that's happened to me You may ask how can I tell When you are near I just know You are my heavonly angel When I was with her I thought I knew love But berfore I meet you my love was stale When I see you it just hits me You are my heavonly angelBrad A. ChristopherCopyright ©2007 Brad A. Christopher

I Take You....
I Take You . . .When I look into your eyesI see the pain you endureI take you by the handAnd help you feel secure.Life isn't easy or fairSometimes you just wish to dieI take you by the heartAnd we spread our wings to fly.People talk about you behind you backAnd it makes you feel a low down shameI take you by the soulAnd I guide you far from the gamesome may like you some may hate youSome may want to be near you some may stay awayI take you by your spiritAnd never lead you astray.As your tears roll down your cheeksYour eyes begin to shine with sincerityI Take You . . .to be mine forever in eternityBrad ChristopherCopyright ©2007 Brad A. Christopher

Winter Snow
Winter SnowSummer's passed And the winter startsLeaves have fallenAnd the sky partsSnows falling Covering the groundIce is forming All aroundThe sun is raisingKids are wakeingFathers are sleepingAnd mothers are bakingSchoolis out Kids are joyfulRoads are closed Workers are mournfulThe snow men are built The kids are insideThe ice crystals meltedAnd the sun begins to hideKids drink their coacoa sitting by the fireEverything warmsWinter flys by.Brad Ashley ChristopherCopyright ©2007 Brad A. Christopher

Some How
Life is crazy and sometimes meanWords of love is hard to findWhen I'm with you I lose controlBut somehow you don't seem to mindI look into my heart and try to seeWhere life will lead me with youI don't know what the future holdsBut somehow it seems that you doI look into your eyes and see your soulWondering what you see in mineAre we dedicated or will this endBut somehow you know everything is fineI can't seem to find the wordsIf only my heart could tell the taleMaybe my mind would step asideBut somehow you can always tellI say to you my love is for youYou repeat the words I love you tooI wish my actions could tell you moreBut somehow you already knew.

Saw It Coming
I saw it coming. This past Thursday the 8th I had an appointment with my Cardiologist. I knew that he was going to give me pills no matter what. The odd thing is he tells me to finish what he gave me before I had the prescription filled. Something was odd because of three people had told me of a Rotorooter pill to clean me out. I cannot see any connection amongst the three at this time. There was two bottles and each in a box and what I coudl find out about them was that it was a Beta Blocker andl isted some common side effect. Beyond that very little was available and no pic of it could be found. I saw it coming. The surgeon insisted I was in the military three years while I knew it as being in two years. DD214 tells me so. Four different versions and one is certified by the military, although my signiture is missing from all six copies of that one. The latest ones sent with my Personnel File which contained the basic information to get in and blank pages. Norio

I Do Get Angry
I admit that I do get angry and if anyone thinks he's such a pain, get real, I can go further. I leave that there. I did talk with Erin the goddess who work for the good ol' surgeon and she says to me at the end they were good questions. God forbid I make sense at times. Anyone keeping up on this will know that I do not like lies. I asked for and received a postponement for the surgery due to the fact that I've yet to quit smoking. Someone said just lie and I could not. The Valve looked good on the Echo and another Echo will be done at the end of the surgery. Triple and maybe a Double due to some times that is allthey can do. I am not going to all the detail of it. She did say active as you are you'd be out in four days and back to your self in three weeks. God forbid I do things like climb trees and work on my house and left weights. Now all I have to figure out is how am I going to lie to myself to give up the smokes. That's a stumper. Norio

Writing
When I'm incased in flames deep down inside I know you are to blame, because without you by my side i have no will to survive. So I've incased myself in flames and all know you are to blame. So I will no die for you are not by my side. I will not cry for I have no reason, and there is no reason to try to save me, because I don't need saving. I'll just stay incased in these flames and know that you are no longer to blame. I'll blame no one but myself for what has happened, because it is only I who can put out these flames that I'm incased in, because I'm to blame for what happened and these flames will keep getting higher and higher incasing me more and more, but yet it don't hurt could this be it is this what death feels like if so it's kinda peaceful no worries, no thoughts, no nothing. So I'm going to stay incased in these flames that I have made and let everyone know that I'm to blame, and that I'm sorry for what I've done while incased, incased in flames.

Writing
I don't know what I've been told, because when I'm without you my heart is stone cold. So now when you look into my eyes what you will see is fire, becuase I'm incased, incased in barbed wire. I'm usually not much of a crier, but I'm incased, incased in barbed wire. So tell me what do you see when you look into the fire, can you see that I'm incased, incased in barbed wire, for you are the only one that can put out the fire in my eyes and free me from this barbed wire, because the harder I try I can't help but to cry, because all I do is add to the fire and incase, incase myself more and more in barbed wire. You are all I desire and the only one that can free me from this barbed wire.

Writing
With this jagged edge I will slice you and dice you. So you better think twice and recheck your dice, becuase if you try you better be willing to die. I hate people that are all talk and no show, because to them I'm like the crow and when I say I want a fight they say no. Then it's on I've had enough, I through the first punch, and there is a nine out of ten chance I'll win all because of this jagged edge I win. It will cause a sin, this jagged edge that's in my hand, because when I'm in a fight I don't play around, I'll get right in there and knock you on the fucking ground, when and if you get up with just one more punch you would be lucky if I don't eat your ass for lunch. All I need is one more punch. Then it's over I guess that wasn't your lucky four leaf clover. So now you are dead and the street is all red, and the jagged edge is all bloody and my pants are all muddy. I warned you before we started that with this jagged edge I always win and this jagged edge would cause a sin. S

Writing
When I look into your eyes all I see are these damn lies, but yet you are still the only one I desire, because when we were one or love was like fire. Since you've been gone, my life has been so cold, and I want to just unfold, because I can't take this any more, because you keep tearing me, tearing me to pieces. I try to piece myself back together, but yet there is still something missing and that something is you, and I don't know what to do for without you my life is through, and you keep tearing me, tearing me to pieces. Yet no matter how much pain I go through it is still you I love, and only you can piece me back together, because you are what is missing. So now when I look into your eyes all it does is make me cry and want to die. No matter how hard I try to say there is nothing wrong or I'll be ok, we all know it's nothing but a damn lie, but if you want me you know were I'm at, I'm right here trying to mend the pieces that you keep tearing me into, and you are still here teari

Writing
Love is like war in so many ways but the main reason is because love and war are both easy to start hard to end and impossible to forget. Believe me what I said is true because you will go through out your life finding what you think is love and it will be easy to start a relationship, but if you find true love you will never want to let it go and it will be hard for you when you loose it and you will never forget that person no matter what happens, because true love last forever and it is always there just like war it is part of life and as for war you here alot about them being started but not much about them ending and when they do people try to forget the pain it caused but yet no matter how hard they try the memory is still there. I tell you this because I just lost the girl I love more than anything and it is hard for me take but yet I will never forget her and I will always love her and would do anything to get her back, so if you have someone you love let them know how you feel

Writing
There are many different causes of death, but the one that is most commonly known is love. Love is a very strong emotion, that is a lot of the time under estimated or taken for granted by people. Love is all around you whether you know it or not, it's just like the air we breathe we know it is there whether or not we see it or feel it. Now back to what I was saying and what this is all about, Death by love. If you stop to think about it you know I'm right when you here there has been a suicide 9 times out of 10 it had to do with love that went wrong or love that was going fine and someone wanted to make sure it stayed that way, but this doesn't just go for a suicide this could also be the reason for a murder. Examples are someone gets jealous or just can't take see the one they love with someone else so they flip out. Love will tend to make a person crazy and do and say things they normally wouldn't. I know you all know what I'm saying, because most of you have been in love or still ar

Gail You Are Right
Gail, you are right. Two lives were destroyed. Both Shirley's and mine. Do not forget Tiger and Sheeba who lost their lives and the Creditors that took the loss. Thank all those involved from ProACT and Mr. Martin Gievers to Federal whatever along with this State of NJ, the County of Gloucester and the municipalities and the physicians, attorney's, Judges both State and Federal, along with their agencies, can't forget the financial institutions, and never the lie spread that was never substantiated. I fought because that is my place as a husband and remain defiant to this day and will until I drop. Norio

Way This Is Going
The way this is going I'll be cured of everything. I went from you don't have, Triple By-Pass, replace the valve, Lazer drill to replace vessels, Aorta, Left Kidney with multiple stints, and have to quit smoking. Now try to lie Norio and a possible Double By-Pass. Quit smoking or say you don't smoke. Two weeks from now you don't need none that but quit smoking. Dr. R, the reason I can do financially is very simple. I'm not married but divorced and she has her alimpny, no children means no grand children, no live in girlfriend, and all I have are the liabilities like mortgage, car payment, and other bills. Cigarettes can be purchased in Delware but if purchase in NJ I'm more likely to stick to 1 pack a day. Also a decent sleep at night from a peacefull day will help tremedously. I smoke less. No, I am not out there doing outrageous things. The police doesn't have to worry about me because there are plenty of others to go looking for. I'm a nice guy that had numerous misfortune. Enough i

After The Fact
20 months after the fact I can use my Latex Foam pillow for almost 15 minutes. I can lay in bed and cock one leg and raise the other one across it for longer. Where is justice and compensation? There is a passage in The Bible where God is The One speaking, Vengence is Mine and Mine Alone. I will repay Evil for Evil, Measure for Measure. 20 months ago I had a slip and fall on a patch of ice at Stonybrook Luxury Apartments in Deptford, NJ 08096. No, this fall was not minor but the act of a PA working for Doctor Obrien in April of the same year nearly killed me. I guess stupidtiy runs togeather in that practice as well as in others. Doctor Obrien is incompetent when it come to hes MD. Not much different than the others except for rare exceptions here and there. I suppose when it comes to Law and Order as is what is fair, truly is the domain of God. Far as this surgery, Doctor Rosenbloom basically stuck it to Cooper Hospital and the rest of the physicians. All of us answer to something. I

Municipal Honey Dippers
Municipal Honey Dippers were at work this Wednesday morning. Lefting the manhole cover and checking for something. I heard the bang as I sat at this monitor and lo and behold three looking in the sewer line for something. Popular is Antifreeze or Engine Coolant but also Ammonia and it's residue from some private manufacturing. They did not appear to be Municipal or State. The tie of Erin and Doctor Rosenbloom? Why do I ask? Simple, Erin could just be lost in work but I picked up something different. Who knows ya know, Human weakness and such but Doctor The Cure circa 1970. 9/9/01 was the destruction of a Laboratory in S CA, the contents but not the building. How dumb I thought. Most likely private contractors because the agencies do not make such a mistake, I hope? Cure to everything was destroyed using what is common for highly Classified Material. Key was everything even paper clips and the ashes it self was completely destroyed. That was a Sunday. Doctor Nichols how about a respo

Just Think
Just think, I'll drop soon and you wont have to worry? Joyce, you want to remember Chapter 7 Bankruptcy that you did not declare. That simple letter written to you was written to Uncle Bud and Aunt Carrol. They never answered, returned unopened, or come looking for me. So how is that car of Vicki's? Can't forget the Deptford Twp Police Department or the Woodbury, and the NJ State Police? Jo-Ann your not good at covering up and I'll have to ask do you have any family members that are FOP? Yeah John, I received blank pages and it said US Attorney's on my Caller ID but unlike you I had to answer those phone calls. Dr. Barb the first time you lied to me you lied three times about Lily and Company? Dr. Cater, you took that position of offense and by doing so forced me to contact the FBI and others. You want me to keep on going or stop and we all behave as Gentlemen and Gentle Ladies? Choice is yours, I see Jo-Ann tomorrow and lets hope the Dead Bolt isn't locked as once before. No

Bring
What will today bring? Should I be a good little boy or not? We will behave as Gentlmen and Gentle Ladies or not? Whatever today brings will be a little different than the past. Checked out The Order? Rosicrucian Order AMORC in San Jose, CA. Take a look and try for awhile. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. Norio

Do The Same Thing
Would you do the same thing? I wanted to remain married to my then wife Shirley with the permanent restraining order in place so that she could receive the benefits from me. Also to pay her monthly for maintenance and as needed for new clothing. Bed and Board Divorce was and still is illeagal by the US ARMY. I nor her meet the criteria of it even though it is recognized. Only reason it would work as I stated in the letter to the Feds was that everything was run by private contractors by- passing the military authority. Even those that invetigate fraud is private contractors. Mr. Gievers that was the Director of ProACT at that time, not only had Shirley lie and commit Federal Fraud and State Fraud but the employee of the State of NJ with in Gloucester County ProACT. 1. Shirley was on Medicare and not Medicaid. 2. Shirley received her meds from Tricare through CVS Pharmacy and not through the State of NJ in Newark, NJ. I could not believe how persistant the Mental Health people were to

Would Appear
It would appear from talking wiith Jo-Ann and the surgeon that they want me to rush to the ER or dial 911. When the condition gets bad enough, apparently, I will do this? They don't know how much pain I can surpress. Diaassociate the personality and I can do thing's that are not possible with me. Imagine that. Norio

Z
We'll start with C as in Cell Phone. I had to have one on me when I traveled due to the fact that Shirley was confined against her will in a Institution. Medicare and Tricare apparently paid until she dropped when it came to these institution. Bad though when Medicare is calling me up to see how a State Judge fits into all this. It was named Hampton Behvioral Health who I gave the news that there are limits by law on how long they pay. They dumped Shirley so quick. It is medicine and it's desire to make more money that old Phenothiazine class of antipsychotics were dropped starting with Haldol and when they got away with it the rest followed. Apparently they are back because these new meds have enourmous side effects just like the old and even worst. They don't work as well or cause other life threatning conditions. Medicine like the corner Pharmacy has got you coming in and going out. Why do they sell cigarettes in a Pharmacy. I guess every penny counts or in this case nail to your co

Point
Point of all this? If it's all made up by me, they can lock me up, however, if it is all true? No, this stops very soon. Why? Because I say so. Seek The Order, Rosicrucian Order AMORC in San Jose, CA. Also understant the fundamenatlas of ZEN as well Christianity. Can't forget The Wheel of Life. Just like that movie MATRIX, beyond it, what is there? It's about time I opened my mouth. Life or death ultimately depends on you. Like it or not you'll all be at this same place sooner or later. As God is my Witness every one will fight and sell everything they have only to end. Last message to my friends. Norio

Indefinate
I placed a indefinate hold on this surgery. 10 years of same quality of life doesn't offer me much. I've been going since Januaru 14th, so lets see how far I will go. Ante up! I've got nothing to gain or to loose, either way. Norio

It Could Have Been
A dark and dreary day it could have been, A funeral procession, Heads hung in mourning numbers, A young woman in infinite slumber, Buried in rich red velvet and dark mahogany; Her friends and family in agony. They ask, "Why did she want to leave? To go, and make us grieve?" The thick gray headstone might have read, Our daughter, Forever, we lay her to bed. Then they'd walk away, weeping And she'd just be sleeping... That was the way it could have been, After weeks and months, maybe ten Years would go by, and someone would query "Who was that girl, so young it was eerie, That she would want to die, Even before she gave life a try." Or ask, "Think of her mother, what must she feel? Does she still think if this is actually real? Or does she wish her baby will still come home?" Even though now her soul might roam In the wide open world she needed so severely, Despite the people she hurt so badly... That was almost the way things turned out, Death seemed the only way to go about The confu

Tough
No I did not make it tough for everyone because I and the rest are dying. Stupidity belongs to many. Blame them. Go through the Blog and I will be happy to answer any questions. See, death is inevitable. Like it or not we all end up dead. The coin says laugh and enjoy because we have countless time to get it right and the flip is why wait that long, attain it right now. Who is right? Both are wrong. Time isn't forever and you sure as heck can't have it because you say so. Between the East and the West is the medium. Some where in there or in the middle, slightly off is the answer. You wont believe it or expect it. Truth is stranger than fiction. No, it is so far out there you'd truly be amazed. Study and know your faith and believe. Study ZEN and join The Order. Rosicrucian Order AMORC San Jose, CA. Study and ask to join TMO. Keep on trying. Odd that the Critic is so silent. Back door was left for the future which has been. Shame no one knew why. Norio but %=0

The Morning After Reality
The Morning After Reality Can someone in all honesty fall in love with someone and know in there heart and in there mind that it will never happen. Can two souls be so alike.. being in total sincronicity with one another ..knowing that just a single kiss could ruin this. Why do complications of the heart always fog the better of ones judgment .. is it the lack or reason or thought .. can love have purpose other then just the common thread that we all see it as .. Why can loving someone have such larger meaning and devotion yet cant. What is truly love.. a thought or a concept of what happiness is. When does happiness become love, just the simple questions one never thinks yet alone asks ..

Avoiding
What am I saying by all this? Look, listen, perceive, and you will always be lost. The wheel looses you into believing. Faith added, you believe and you sustain yourself and the wheel of life. I am trying my best to avoid something. The last Trime that I had on February 20th was nothing but TMO. Death, basically negates any promise, oath, vow, and cetainly any contract. Yes, I have the goods and I intend, never, to take action on it. All will be better off on the wheel forever on the wheel you will be. At least within the mundane there is safety. Norio

I Look While Others See
I look at the world while others say they see. Difference should be obvious. You see while I look. To say you see, you have already passed judgement. Looking I have yet to do so. Follow my Blog and you can see how others view me, you, and themselves. I watched the evening news last week with famous Mr. and Mrs. Bill Gates and the question was what is the future far as the PC? The response came down to the PC will interact with you, meaning entertainment. You'll be occupied. You will not be needed. In MATRIX some get unplugged and here, we will be plugged in. Like it or not your needs will be filled and without you they will be very happy. I see two worlds and they are both good. Either one does not matter because the ultimate end is good. One is Paradise and the other is not. The end is good. In a song "call someplace paradise and kiss it good bye." Conversation she asked, is the world coming to a end? I did not answer in that, I am not fit to give that answer. That answer, will have

Pain
WOW! remembering when Iheld you for the first timein my embraceyour arms wrapped around meyour warm body against mineyour hands caressing meI felt a sweet sensationA sensation my body never feltI felt your soft kisses and tonguefor it was an angel to me God dealtStarting at the top of my earmy body shivered with blissslowly moving down to my neckWe sat on the bed and began to kissmy hands wrapped around your waist my lovethen slowly kissed your silky skinsoftly moving to those piercing breastsMy body tingled, my mind began to spin soon making love so pure and sweetIt had never felt so rightA distant, hidden fantasy of lovenever imagined it would happen that night the day my heart was open by mysoulmate the one that had the key

The Day
To some people is just another day. For me this is a day my life begain with my love.So I Stop, and think what we've been through and how much are love as grew. Yes we fight, and cry but never forget for you I would die. everyday I see your beautiful, smiling face, and there are moments that I stare and you take my breath away, and leave me with nothing to say, on this special day the day god bless me with my queen I ask myself how it is possible to love a person so much. my heart has been permanently touched. all the tears and pain seem to go away. The pieces of my heart that were chiseled away, you make them ok. once there was a deep dark hole nobody could touch, until you came and filled it with all your love. on this special day I want you to know, I love you More than I could write down, tell, explain or even try to show, In this life or the next. I've said things I regret, And they hurt you inside and made you cry, but let those things die,not you and I. I want to be with you t

The Rose
The redness of the rose has faded dark watch falling peddles drift down To the ground vanishing into ashes disappeared with the wind he cant do anything to bring his rose back to life as it dies before his eyes all he can do is cry this rose was his source of power that gave life to his stream for everypeddle that falls def ripping his soul apart as hegets weaker and wearier he screams with all he has left in his body Father what have I done to disseverthis death for I am the life steam your rose for you created meas a seed bringing light of the sun water from the world tobirth me the blood that flows through my veins is the bloodof your only son the son of love why have you forsaken meand a voice replied I have never left you or forsaken you I have rebirth you asA new seed you are no longer halo you are now my new bread

Take A Bow
It's time for me to be leaving nowto leave the stage and to take a bowIf only you would tell me howto love I've seen the light the other dayIt's not so bright and I must sayIs there not any other wayTo see mefor I have done my ut-most bestI have been better than the restbut still I haven't passed the test I know that I can only trybut still can't help but wonder whythat you will not just come on byto see me I looked at the sky this afternoonwas quite surprised to see Your smiling faceYour warm embraceLike that day at the beachIt seems my night time falls too soon for if you were not so angryfor the stupid things I doTo see I apreciateThe things you dothere is nothing left to saynow all my dreams have washed awayAnd you said it on my birthday“Im done with you”remember words can take life away don’t let what we have come build head for the slaughter like cattlewaiting for death to knock at their doorI meant what I said always and foreverYou’re my queen and im yo

The Kiss Of Death
The pain inside mewouldn't easily just melt awaystarted off with a slap across my faceends with the kiss of hate,kiss of hurt, kiss of bitterness the pain in my heart is stillinside mewhich would burst any momentthe look I saw from her eyes told me she was sicked of mei felt infinity of daggers stabbingstraight into my heartthe pain would have its place inside me eternally Kiss me tonight without saying anythingkiss me until the blood sproutskissing me with rage, it is my farewell tomorrow I leave without knowing where! Kiss me without rest with your best kisskiss me with happiness, while my soul criesKiss me until the dawn arriveskiss me with limitless passion kiss me.... just kiss me...Without saying anything!for that kiss was the kiss ofDEATH!!!!!

Friends
Its funny how we sit and type,and we stare at our screensWe all have to wonder, what this possibly means.With our mouse we roam, through the rooms in a mazelooking for something or someone, as we sit in a daze.we chat with each other, we type all our woessmall groups we do form, and gang up on our foes.we wait for somebody, to type our nameWe want recognition, but it is always the sameWe give kisses and hugs, and sometimes flirtin IMs we chat deeply, and reveal why we hurt.We do form friends but-why we don't knowbut some of these friendships, will flourish and grow.Why is it on screen, we can be so boldTelling our secrets, that have never been told.Why is it we share, the thoughts in our mindWith those we can't see, as though we were blind.The answer is simple, it is as clear as a bell.We all have problems, and need someone to tell.We can't tell real people,

Communicating With
Who am I communicating with? Aint the hoods and may be friends but who can use the information I provide? If you get it, congratualtion and if not so be it. There is a purpose and a reason for everything. Nothing is ever a waste. The ugly nonsense that I see, even that can propel me to do something greater than. Veterans Day is coming up soon. Lets remeber a Vet and thank him or her for their sacrafice. Coming also is Thanksgiving and Christmas and other holidays. Lets remember someone and try to do a nice deed. Norio

The Dragon Maiden
She walks alone, with her head held highA never fading smile upon her lipsand a warm touch to her cheeksHer strength comes from deep within her heart and mindNever have two sides complimented each other so wellWhether she shows her gentle caring sideor if she wishes to be the wild child deep in her mindshe is always in confidence a great person and friendWhether she braves the weather or faltersshe gives it her all in doing what she lovesShe will forever follow her own heart before others opinionsand she possesses the knowledge beyond her years to know the differenceHer passions in life are always there for anyone to seeshe holds no shame in who she isShe'll never falter when following her heartShe is the Dragon Maiden

Easy Hard
It was a easy ride to Delaware but at the same time it was hard on my body and mind. Takes a toll but saved about $50.00 on two cartons. Kept me busy for about two hours. I smoke around pack and a half. Sometimes less and others more. I talked about East and West. Some where between the two teachings there is a middle ground and no, I am not saying the Middle East. In the two teaching there is a humble truth. It is slightly bent so it is difficult to see it. I am not against religion at all but when it takes over every thing that you are and all your time and money, you lost the focus of it's true meaning. People get rich off of this. Tax and IRS. Anyone remeber Rev. Baker being in prison for failing to pay millions in back taxes and he is, far as I know a Natural Born Citizen of this great country? Any one remeber Rev. Moon from South Korea where he dodged everything and got away owing billions to this country in back taxes? Apparently he is untouchable. As I understood him he clai

Popularity Of Cuckolding
When cuckolding is a humiliation fantasy, it works best when the individual with the fantasy believes cuckolding is hopelessly the only choice for their relationship. This may be one of the reasons cuckold fantasy stories sometimes contain the theme that females are genetically predisposed to desire the "alpha-male", prefer men with larger genitalia or that their wives are driven with wild lust. Cuckolding as a dominant voyeuristic act While the word origin and most historic accounts define the cuckold husband as being submissive, powerless and/or in need of humiliation to receive stimulation, contemporary practice suggests the possibility of something altogether different. Rather than passively acceeding to the infidelity and desires of an errant wife, this cuckold is more in keeping with the male partners defined in polyamorous, open, or swinging relationships. In this manifestation, the cuckold is a consummate voyeur who derives great pleasure from seeing his "hot wife" or

Cultural Usage
In Australia, Brazil, Germany, Bulgaria, Greece, Italy, Poland, Portugal, Russia, Croatia, Slovenia, Spanish speaking countries and also Arabic speaking countries, "horns" are a metaphor for suffering the infidelity of a partner, not limited to husbands in modern usage. However, the use of the term dates from the Roman empire, since legionaries returning from the war were given horns as a triumph or prize. So, the use of the term is a mockery of the husband, victorious in the battlefield, but defeated in his own bed. The gesture of the horned hand can be used to insult the cuckold. The Italian equivalent is cornuto, sharing the same exact double entendre with cornuted, asserting both featuring horns and cuckolded. Its use is playful and lightheartedly derisive, with little or no particular efficacy in scorning someone during confrontations as it is lacking earnest damning credentials, potentially leading all parties to a chuckle and smothering the feud at its inception. A pervasive

In Animal Behavior
"Cuckoldry" is also a term used in the study of animal behavior to denote brood parasites, laying their eggs in the nests of other birds. The best-known example is the European Common Cuckoo from which the term derives. The cuckoo egg hatches earlier than the host's, and the cuckoo chick grows faster; in most cases the chick evicts the eggs or young of the host species. The chick has no time to learn this behavior, so it must be an instinct passed on genetically. The mother still feeds the cuckoo chick as if it were her own, the chick's open mouth serving as a sign stimulus for the host to feed it.

Cuckold As A Fetish
Cuckoldry as a fetish has been around since at least the time of Leopold von Sacher-Masoch (the writer after whom the term Masochism is coined). Sacher-Masoch's wife, Aurora Rümelin, recounts in her memoirs multiple instances of Sacher-Masoch asking, begging and even threatening her to make her cuckold him so he could experience the pain and humiliation of the act. To that end, Sacher-Masoch created multiple opportunities for the adulterous act to occur, none of which were successful. While Rümelin indulged her husband in many of his masochistic requests, due in large part because to her dependence on him to financially support her and her children, she steadfastly refused to cuckold him. Rümelin's refusal to succumb to Sacher-Masoch's cuckolding fantasies was one of the causes of their separation and her subsequent descent into poverty.[citation needed] The term has acquired additional meanings within certain sub-cultures, referring to couples wherein the female is dominant and she

Mickey
What if my Cardiologist gave me a Mickey. Mr. Phil stated it as a Rotorooter pill, Pharmacy worker questioned me if my plan covers it, Jo-Ann even asked about this amazing pill, and yet Dr. Viswanath says there is no such a thing. Last meeting with him, I knew I could not miss because of what he is going to give me. He told me three different times to finish what's in the two bottles before I have the prescription filled? I do feel better in many sense but not like I was in my late thirties, however, I cannot deny what I feel and what took place between him and me. Far as any transgrittions by any of my physicinans, I am certain it was well intentioned or just an accidental mistakes. I know I made number of mistakes and one of the most serious was my marriage to Shirley and for 25 years I kept it up. Looking backwards this divorce was very painful to me as it was, was the best thing for me. Far as smoking I intend to quit but I hate someone telling me I have to because there is no ot

Have To Wonder
I have to wonder why this Doctor at Ft. Hood decided to do what he did? No, I have no answer and most likely never will. Things happen in life that are way beyond my understanding let alone my control. Today is Sunday and I've yet to fufill a promise of me attending a church someone attends. This church is not far from me and I keep telling myself I will go and yet, never get ready. Somethings are lost cause and others I have to wonder. Norio

Recovered
I just recovered from what happened to me last night about half an hour ago but half an hour before that I took the beta blocker. Jo-Ann noticed the difference with me and said something and I told her of what took place and also of the week. Nothing out of the norm except now I'm on the prescription version from the pharmacy not from my Cardiologist. I carried on today as usual Monday but had difficulty waking up at past 6 AM and the alarm was set at half past six. Normal Monday, meaning I still trained with mixed weights. This week end was tough since I've been on the prescription version of the meds my Cardiologist gave me. That ran out Thursday and Friday I started the new batch. Norio

Why Would I Call It
Why would I call it Civil Rights violation? The physician, whatever hes intentions made it that by the statement of he would have to do it if it was an emergency in ER by 911 and ambulance but refuses to do so even though it is an emergency. Without it I'm dead very soon but is refusing to do so because I smoke like others and even the one in ER. I am refusing to lie about it by saying I smoke outright instead of saying I don't and go back to it. He made the statement the there is no use of going through all this if I continue ot go back to it. He is imposing the condion that he wants on me but lets go of it in the ER situation. Two faced, perhaps, and I understand how bad smoking is like illicit drugs and something quite legal like alcohol but regulated by age like any cigarettes. I know this. Lot of the States made tons of money on the settlement by the makers of cigarettes. What happened to the Cigar, snuff, and can't forget the booze and the places that make money from the sale, tr

Waiting
I have been patiently and some time very vocally waiting since January 14th of this year to keel on over dead. Host of things have happened since and all showed their hands in one way or another but here it is November 10th and I am wondering where is this God intent on taking me? At five my mother tells me we're going to the temple at around 8 PM and The Order is politely reminding me through the things I have to study to come to the temple and you know what as much as I would like to go to the temple, I don't have time. Why is that? I'm still waiting to keel on over but walk through my liife as normal but vocal at times and yet leave no foot print. Better put is minimal foot print. I took up time and space today as I did yesterday and we'll see what tomorrow brings if any thing because I might not make it to bed or even wake up like the rest of you. Don't put off until tomorrow what you can mend right now. Tomorrow may come in a place you never expected. Cheers, as they say in UK

Close To My
As a close to my Veterans Day I was informed from someone that my files are sealed. That would be my Military Personnel File. Also, added was it's strange. My conversation with the FBI Desk Agent was odd as if he expected me to know all this meaning about "0". Also I ran rings around him. I thought I hope I'm dealing with the bottom of the FBI barrel because he can't be the best they have. My friend Gary has the idioicity to use WACHOVIA or Wells Fargo format for all hes email's to me. Except the last two contact. One was text and the other a rather, how can I put this, elaborate and very childish way to hide. By hes three email's to me, he said to me, yes I had prior knowledge of your or mine supposed Heart Surgery that never took place. Ed, you owe me money. I gave you $20.00 extra and the rest you owe me for service not rendered. I took care of the IRS. I was after who put him on me. You know, who is the wack? I already knew but I wanted him to say the name or do exactly what he

Why Does It
Why does it become murder or premediatated murder? Sipmle, one year prior to now infamous Echo Doppler the same test was done and there was 55% blockage and Trivial leakage from the one valve to you dont have eight weeks, to if you dont have this surgery your dead. The effect of the Insulin did the damage and not the blockage. Insulin also damaged my Spinal and CNS and the fall at Stonybrook finished me. Nothing in the drug manufactures literature says anything about Insulin induced Coma. So Doctor Viswanath my appointment with you has been cancelled. Talk to Doctor Rosenbloom why I did that. Here, no sense of wasting any money or yuor time on me since death has been planned for me by Doctor Rosenbloom and the rest. Doctor Rosenbloom took the attitude and position of quit smoking or no surgery. The two of you and the rest should be able to figure out that 10 years of life as is for me is not worth it. I'm not going to let any woman get involved in my life because of it. All of you c

Life Is A Prison
Life is a prison, Oh God let me out. No one to listen, To hear when you shout. Climb the walls of insanity, Ride the waves of despair. If you fall it don't matter, There's no one to care. Used to wish for a window, To see birds, trees and sky, But you're better without one - Stops you aiming too high. Watching freedom is painful, For those locked away. Seeing joy, love and happiness, Another price that you pay. Strong is good, weak is bad. Be it false, be it true. Your mind makes the choice, And enforces it too. Cell walls built by society, With rules to adhere. If you breach the acceptable, You had better beware. Hide the pain, carry on, Routine is the key. Don't let on that you're not, What you're pretending to be. Lock it all up inside you, How badly that bodes. Look out for that one day, When it all just explodes. Leaving naught but a shell, Base functionality too. But killing all else, That was uniquely you. So how do you grow, With a timebomb inside? Or how to defuse it, Without

Time To Go
being on this site has been FUN FUN FUN!! but I am not on here much anymore. so I will be deleting my account later today. if you are a friend who wants to keep up with my fight against breast cancer....i am on yahoo mps.smith@yahoo.com please let me know who you are before you assume I will add you. I am not angry or anything about fubar, it's just I am not on here anymore. I have no time to leave love and no one ever visits or leaves me love....i understand the love me back principle.....so I am not angry. I have met some amazing ppl on here and I cherish all the memories I made in the 2+ years I have been on here (may be longer, I can't remember...LOL) so it's BYE for now and I pray each of you find happiness in your life!! (I will go now before I get all choked up.....) ~~SMOOCHES~~ {{HUGS}} Melissa AKA ~sinfullydelicious~/~survivor~ and don't forget to be aware....check your boobies!! :)~

Just Another Night
Just beginning all this on the wrong foot. I'm normally a very charismatic individual. Not a care in the world and enjoy the scenery. But at night, alone in this big house. I tend to linger onto relationship things. and how i should close that part of me that needs the feeling of a warm body. Hopefully my next blog won't be as sappy. Until then, Keep me in mind, next time that ass hole just gave you a black eye, or dumped you for that dip shit slut he met at a bar. Always here. The Captain.

Or Two
A physician before I left told me I'd be back in a day or two. A day plus has passed and quickly approaching two on Sunday. Who knows, you maybe right? I might be knocking on the door of Cooper Hospital before Sunday 11 AM? First decent meal since last Saturday. I feel a little better and more balance wtihin myself. Stability is being achieved and energy balance as well. My sister several years ago assumed that I answer to no one and do pretty much what I want. Here I'll correct this misperception right now. I answer to God and do what The Christ induces me to do. No, God or The Christ does not converse with me and never did. Norio

Insane Spazin
Here i come spittin half ill ish. Horrorcorish ill lyricism spittim. Nothin get's em. Call me what you want i don't care ass or dick. I spits with the ill wicked shit. Nothin to loose half out with itz. I'ma keep goin on with what i'm sayin fuck ain't no playin. I got skills ill be the illest black half rap juggalo. None spittin average flows yo so. Here i go dippity dabbity twistin up the funk scheme flow turnin insanin ill flawin powerin. No stallin. Raise up dead bodies i'm iller then blacker to attack ya. Its the black wicked juggala aka the nightstalker back on the prowl. You don't know how no my dayum name ain't sal. & i'm not your fuckin pal bitch. I curse use profanity out of my own insanity. No you or anyone can tell me what i wanna do. I do just what the fuck i wanna do. Say what the fuck i wanna say speakin of which. I don't wanna black bitch. I wanna thick white queen. With a curvy mayonnaise lookin ass so fhat. Its all stacked with 44 ddd's. Believes how its not to perceiv

Insaneviless Freestyle
Insaneviless steppin em up comin in again. Spittin with shit thats hard for thin. Insaneviless stressin off hard on shit. No mess no kicks time tick tock its as it is straight handling over a lyrical virtue. Mis lightweight handler dismantlin shit over ya. Brains unstrainin with what you sayin. Lyricals go on with the insane reality. It ain't all up to be with what you see. Everything ain't all in its superioristy lost yaself in ya own discomfortable zone. Animosity gets the best while i just leave ya like the rest. Ain't kickin no shit thats a mess insaneviless to put kick push wushin my way through to let you know how i just do. Straight off handin shit to you on a plate with no platter. While you off in yo brain fuckin scatters. So what the fuck is the matter. You head like games just like the mad hatter. Batterin up chargin like a ram. Just like my sign is. I'm a ram & they say i'm ego headed. Gearin off with what shit is deaded i'm off & unleaded. To not let know what shows how it

Was It Just
Do think it was just a shower or the six days? Get real. It was my neck and head. The Cervical Spine and the position I was forced into by the hospital bed caused enormous pain and head ache. This nausea and vomiting may have been caused by it. Here it is four days past and a little more and I have no nausea and very limmited pain. No narcotics are being used by me. Just two Advil is all. If this surgery is ever offered to me again it will have to have all the prep up front and have me come in and on that very same hour the surgery. The neck will have to be addressed in advance to something like that. To that beautiful young lady, a Nurse, my apology to you. I did what I did for the sake of survival and not out of any animosity to you or any one. I regreted my actions but I tried my best to explain to Neurology staff physician but all that was getting through hes head was what he wanted to assume. I found the same attitude and mentality by other specialties. I found the Residents an

Revolution?
Talk on all sides is revolution? Forget it. They got it covered. Expected and anticipated. Quit putting your money in what they recommend. You'll be empty handed and out in the street. Forget investing into but your own selves. Forget cash as well because we will become a cash less society. Can't buy squat or claim shit unless you're able to verify through the IRS. So anyone living on illicit cash get ready for control to take over. Do'nt like it take it up with those the electorate palced into office. You don't believe that you placed them into office do you? Please read The US Constitution as they should of taught you from the very beginning. To late to wake up because they got it all figured out, unfortunately, they left out God. I expect to exit and do a mia coupa, the ultimate coup de tar. Otherwise, enjoy your Thanksgiving. Norio

Argument
I received a Certified Return Receipt letter from Dr. Rosenbloom of Cooper Hospital today. Politely he states that if I don't have this surgery I'm dead and to reconsider. "?" I believe it is the wrong argument? If I have this surgery tomorrow I'll live forever? How about twenty five years? How about ten years in a Coma? What ever I do or don't and what ever any one else does or doesn't do I'm still dead. The argument is senseless and foolish. Try a little harder? Give me an Argument that is worth while. Norio

Pipe Up
My critic, pipe up. Long time ago I was member and unfortunately I still am. Member of what? Forget the crap with The da Vinci Code and the rest. Dan Brown and others made a host of money out of it. There is The Order and within it TMO. Let's not forget The Brotherhood. I'm out running around because ,all of a sudden, I couldn't remeber. Door ajar is coming up and I already know how, who, when, and why. Gee, no fun is it? Yes, it is! Joseph, you win and are absolutely right. Thank God, I didn't have that surgery. In the ER a physician becomes a laughing stock. "We go in there nothing happens but when a Cardiologist goes in there everything is up." Joseph to which country is your aliance to? Rev. Baker served hes time in prison for millions owed in back taxes to The IRS, while Rev. Moon runs away to S. Korea owing billions in back taxes to The IRS. Amazing, if your an American your crap but a foreign fake, pretending to be a USA Citizen, you get it all. Seems there are all sorts

Session
Fubar and others are my bitch session with a dose of truth and a whole lot of nonsense. Last time I looked the hits was at five figures and it has been a long time since I did look. That was for myspace. One thing I'll say is that The Order has been awful quiet toward me and accepting of all that I come up with against in their teaching making me look like a fool hell bent on destroying it. I'm not and nor am I trying to hurt any by what I place here. As I've said they know who they are and if there was any misunderstanding of what I did or didn't do they shoudl see some light. Black Friday has come and gone and I didn't hear of or read any kind of trouble from it. Thank God! Norio

Door
You got it! I take the door and good bye to the contract and the rest. Means I'm already using it on regular basis. No, never did I change my mind. Remember what they taught us about absolute control and dicipline. Possibility always existed. Mr. Keith was going to buy the entire block in South Philly to impress hes church followers and buy hes way to God or perhaps be god. Where does this man who urinates in public get this kind of money. Figure it out. Witness. Norio

Broken Back In
The so called contract was broken back in August between the hours of four and five in the afternoon, with the required two witnesses. One a devout Roman Catholic and the other a Roman Catholic Priest. First letter written was do not follow my lead and never underestimate someone like me. It has to be me. Come up with a letter that says your dead without this surgery and I have the following. With or without this surgery I will die. Get it? I'm dead just like you. Like it or not we are all dead. So what happened in Cooper Hospital? You want me to lead by hand? So why this hoopla with this surgery while to me I don't care since we are all dead sooner or later? I'd be happy to blab it all out. God forbid. Look God is all poweful, all knowing, and everywhere. Does God need tons of prayer or anything else so this all God knows? Does God need a place to reside? We need much less holy rollers with their hands in your pocket or bank account. We need less medicine with hands in your pocket

Conversation
The conversation with Miss. C lasted over an hour and she comes out with I don't like the police. I'll clarify something right now. I'm all into Law Enforcement. Problem I had with the police was not them. Someone way up must of said hassle em. The way up would have had to have way too much money and the political link. Beyond that I'm not saying any more. Nothing further needs to be said except leave the past where it belongs, in the past. I like The Police and Law Enforcement at all levels. As I like all Emergency workers and the sacrifce they have and are making. Including those at every Hospital and Institutions. On the news early this morning I saw what took place. A travesty with proportion of unknown. You have their loved ones. God be with them all. Norio

Look
Look I have to add the following to the previous post. You don't have to take anothers life because of what ever. Do yourself in and leave the other people out. Don't park on the bridge because you may cause an accident where another gets hurt. Your angry or depressed. please, get help. There are a lot of people who love their carreir choice and love to help you with the crisis that life brings. Your addicted to something, again, get help. More you try to get help the more help you get and is avilable. Tendency is to isolate and for some this is necessary in the beginnig. Bring the wall up and keep it up nothing can penetrate and your true self cannot get out. A plant with out light dies. How man times do I see this. Statement to be made is get over it and try to go on with life. There are a host of help out here and please untilize them. Like me. I had to setlle thing with my own self before I could even make a statement like the above. I am very gentle and caring but at times I se

Another Writing
he relizes that he hurt the one and only love of his life. He sits in the darkness beating himself up hoping that death will soon come. he wont sare take his own life for the fact of a promise he made his love. As he lays down at night he hears her voice in his head and he starts crying out her name asking for forgivness from the godds and goddest's. he wakes to himself screaming out his loves name to find that she is no longer there and that all he is holding in the pillow that she once laid her head on to sleep. when he awakes in the morning he starts to cry once again. he then relizes that this is the life he deserves for the rest of his life for what he done to loose his one and only true love

Look For My
You'd think this man is plain damned crazy? I was going to shut this down but for one reason. Go look for my Harsh Critic who irked me enough to reveal some of these idiotic things. Jack Anderson practiced a type of Journalisim. He took some highly classified truth and mixed it with whole lot of nonsense. I took the truth but never revealed compleltely what really was there. As before some of this stuff will go with me to death. Norio

Understanding Is
The understanding is I am competent to make a decision as to my health. My Psychiatrist agrees with me to let go of major medical treatment of my health. No wife, children, and the rest is material things. Odd occurance with Cheryl before and after the hospital. She wanted the keys for my house? In case something should happen to me and also lot of what if's. What if she was the wife and the benefits while I'm alive and after death. Today it's more confrontational as if she wanted a fight. In front of my house in sight of all I politely excused myself and went inside. Again, it goes back to what this house holds as to the rights to all these properties? Some up for sale but upon checking they are not listed with, as said. I did have this odd dream about this house before I even saw it and quite taken by the house upon looking at it. Can't forget how dark and stromy everything became when I arrived here for the settlement walk through. So much for the odd and bizzare. Joined The Orde

Focus
As my focus changes this will become less. I have to see about this on again and off agaon surgery. Insurance tends to make some go on while others go out. Had I stayed that week end nothing would of happened. Maybe this week I would of made it home. By the looks of things I may have it done by the New Year but which New Year is not known. Joined The Order? Rosicrucain Order AMORC in San Jose, CA. No, I get nothing for it and mention me because they love me since I am so negative towards some of their behavior. Although they have been very polite to me and do not ask me for any money I still am hesitant to go beyond the mention of them here. Norio

Who Why What
Who is this telemitsu? Why would I say what I did to telemitsu? What did I say to telmitsu? Who placed the corpse of The Christ on my hospital side rail? Why would someone do so? What is the meaning behind it. Who wrapped me in cloth and blanket like a mummy? Why would someone wrap me like a mummy? What is the meaning behind that action? Who motivated me to leave like I did from the hospital? Why did I leave? What is all this about? Telemitsu will never look for me on the net. Why would I knowing this communicate to him, because he will get it third hand. What I said is we move forward. Corpse without the cross behind it is a warning just like the wrap like a mummy. It meant my death and to carry it out and hit the road as given to me. This is my past catching up to me as given to me by someone I gave a warning of death. Enemy is with you. Paid me back in full. Now I will pay her back in full. I have never laid an eye on her. It has been some time since then. She will use every decepti

Just Being
To be nobody but yourself in a world which is doing it's best, night and day,to make you everybody else means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; And never stop fighting..E.e Cummings 1955

Offer
I am unfit as a man let alone a Human Being if I cannot or refuse to offer my hand in Peace to Cheryl! I have done so. I'd rather be apart from her knowing that I did what was good in The Eyes of God instead of baseness on my own self a mere man. Three ways to define myself and two are already taken care of. One is that I will complete my donation this month to finish the year. I did not sware it but intended to carry it out. Two, Medicare assignment means something. If a physician or a hospital accepts it, that is all they receive from their patient along with the secondary if any. No secondary means that the patient is responsible for that part. To ask for more in payment beyond that is against Fedreal Laws. Politely I will remind someone but who knows he can't even read a medical report. Three, I guess Mr. Spitz and the IRS doesn't know when to stop or quit, giving me the upper hand. Again, politely but loudly I will let them know what this upper hand is. I have no problem to pur

From My Heart To Yours
There’s a candle inside my heart and burns for you, And ooohhhh…all my love is all for you, And that’s all you really need to know, When searching for love…you don’t have to go very far, Because I am here for you Sometimes we lose our heads…reading in between lines and facts, Trying to prove love wrong or right…and ooohhhh, We fight to say the things….that’ll make us cry, And I…love you… that’s why I’ll never say goodbye, Ooooohhhhh…I am in love with you Sometimes we grow old…and die before we say what’s in our hearts, But I… will say it every day…and you… can hold my hand, As I close my eyes…and see you no more…. Till that day comes, I will love you… as you are and I’ll never hurt you, The love I have for you…never came from a book…it came from how you make me feel There’s a flame burning inside my soul…a

Put Me To Sleep
This time like another time the Angina put my to sleep. Wow, how serious we are about the Nitro and the beta blocker? Like this surgery? I experienced the right eye again. This time I was looking at the left eye of a woman. First time I was looking out from the right eye of someone and than to look back. Someone? The Order a front. TMO the same. Freemason just alike. It is said that pot is a gateway. The three alone are a gateway and some. At the hospital I was watchnig Jenna and how furious she became and I thought maybe I better shut this off. My Nurse obviusly didn't like her. Mason Moore I just watched and it was tha Tattoo that caught my attention. On the fingers and the abdomen. Sometihng similar someone had. Norio

Remember
Today is the day we remeber those that died and still carry the wounds when Japan attacked us. Let those that passed and are still here be Blessed by God and us and this great nation of ours, The United States of America. Norio

Sign Out
Why did I sign out? Besides my neck and the pain it was the fact that the weekend was coming up. Nothing gets done on the weekend. At best the surgery may have been on the following Tuesday. Possibly much further in the future? Same Cardiologist that became the laughing stock of ER was the one that told me there is no surgery today or Wednesday, and they are waiting for the blood test result. He is the same one that told me Lab Corps,they didn't trust and that's why they took the blood. I suppose it was good enough back in July but maybe I should tell everyone that according to this Cardiologist from The Heart House in Haddonfield, Lab Corps should be avoided due to their inaccuracies and to go to Cooper Hospital for all their blood work. Do I believe that? Hell, no! Lab Corps is just as good as any. He is the sameone that said after the results we want to do another Cath. and depending on that result the surgery will be done the following day. I have a better idea. Set up the Cath. a

Three And More
I did those three things and more. Some never understand to let it go. I thought I was the one. No, there are many looking for the final say and the only one they may ever get is my death because of them. At the Cooper hospital I tell the Cardioogist I' ll go back to smoking out of spite and he walks out. Soon after that there was very loud laughter by the ER. I am back to smoking. WTF? A dialogue with Mr. Finance in SC just ended with him accusing me of what he exactly is. That boy is nothing but hatred, bitterness, fear, paranoia, and the rest. I should of listened to my 7th grade classmates. They said why are you missin with him? He's a geek. I over looked hes failures and I should of never over looked my classmates advice. They knew me better than him. Hes antics forces me into no surgery out of spit. Not spite but spit. What's spit? Hell fer I know like WTF? What the whatever right? I mean come on here. Six days and off I go. No surgery? What do you want 10 years? 10 years I may h

Spent A Lot Of Time Like Me
I have a childhood friend in SC who spent a lot of time like me in West Germany. Ubfortunately he considers himself white, blond, blue eyes, and of European Stock but neglects to metion the Cherokee Nation that he is a part of. Unlike him I know myself a little better and know my racial make up better than him. I am also white and WASP because my father was but do not mislead myself of the other half being from Japan. Although a citizenship is given me from there but I was born where I was Initiated. Yes, I am very cryptic and this is the way it is now. Norio

What Would You Do
What would you do if the IRS owed you $6601.00? They are holding it they think legally and they are not. At least one thing they'll have. What is that one thing? Death do not hang on me. This is not the first or the second but the fourth time messin with them. How quickly they forget how polite I was to them regarding a very sticky situation regarding the VA and their illegality. Another time I let a dead dog lay but unfortunately that was never setteled and I have nothing to loose but my life. Imagine that, favor after another is done by me and here they are raisinig their heel at me. If it was a beautiful lady I'd over look it. Goddess T has left and I will not call her to see. A letter was sent to the IRS, Certified, Return Receipt along with a letter to the USAG via Registered, Return Receipt regarding some matter as my being vague. So what's the deal if I'm alive or dead? Doesn't matter to you does it? So it should not matter to anyone else should it? A surgery is planned but I f

Monday
Tomorrow is Monday and I think it is appropiate to cancel the Cardiac Cath. and the surgery. Why would I do that? It has to be me don't you think? You have purpose and reason enought to fight and struggle. My price is different than yours. You are satisfied for the most part with life. I see nothing here or any place else going through the trouble like what would of have come up had I stayed on that path. My past does color my out look on life and what is going on here and ultimately how I view the future. If your content and happy you have your reward. I was not and am not content or happy with what life has to offer me. I'm not sure what's on the other side but I'll go and take a look and stay awhile when the opportunity arrives. Hell and damnation and such, if there is such a thing, will happen here. As I read The Bible again, it still speaks of the same thing, however, the foot notes as it is given to me is way off target. Yes, it can mean that but taking into consideration the oth

20 Washington Place
US Attorneys from 20 Washington Place in Newark, NJ, remember last September right after Labor Day, you're right I'm giving up. Congratulations, you and the rest won. What did you win? Everything. So take care of all of the mess. Wipe it up and clean it up. It never was my place to do that, however, you are all fit to do so. Far as the IRS, stupid but expected. Who do I go to for that? Not only clean it up but figure it out. Fun, life is full of fun. Norio

Pipe Up
Anyone want to pipe up or the pied piper will remain in silence. As I said I have little to gain from this. 24th is the day. No use after that. Actually it is from 21st to the 24th. Why? Why not? I will not explain because I have no reason to. I know who, what, and the reason. Absence and the silence is noted justifying my position. Today is the 15th and that leaves nine days. In The Bible The Christ or The Lord talks about many things. He talks about John The Baptist briefyl. In one passage he tells those gathered, what did you go out in the wilderness to see? A reed bending in the wind? Also in The Old Testament a passage that says they will beat their sword into plowshares. The Lord turns around and says, I believe in John's Gospel, he who has a coat must sell it and buy a sword. Odd in reference to a Man of God anda Man of Peace. He says, think not that I came to bring peace but to put at odds son against father, daughter against mother, and daughter inlaw against mother inlaw. He

Finding The Gurl I Once Was
No one understands but the girl who have been abused By the "man" who has left you so hurt and confused Why me? What did I do? To not being able to move on from the things that you do I have changed in my life and not become who I dreamt All because you took it all away from me I am 18 years old and 2 years hasn’t over come what you did It haunts me I hate you I don’t remember my childhood like others do When I think of my childhood I think of you.. Its blocked out the happy daysin my life I wish you would jus go away or die The hardest thing is it was you so close to me, and my Family I can not change what I have become You don’t know what its like to not be able to overcome I am writing this now because its never talked about no one knows I walk through life with this on my shoulders everyday.. The truth is out I hope you die I was daddy’s lil girl until you hurt me…

Why Do I Have To Hide
Because they will judgeThey will see the pain and the emotionThats been hidden away all this time.They will make up excuses and set up appointments.They will watch me and follow my every move.They will try to fix meBut I know I am unfixable.I am beyond helpI have been completely broken.I once needed helpI once asked for it.No one came.Now they try to forgive and forget,To make amends without apologies.Its too late for that.None of them helpedNow its just me!!!!!!!

Second Best
I look to you.You won’t look me in the face.another Painful reminder of.exactly where i place.So mad and hurt.That you couldn’t careless.Back to the feeling.Of being second best.You don’t understand.Because you have never been there.The short phreses.And the empty Stare.So find what you want.And find out Quick.If that might be me.Then act on it.

Just A Game
The darkest night is harmless.The deepest waters always clear.Nothing in this whole wide world compares to you my dear.Life to most seems unfair or lame,and to some just a game.But you'll never know how dear you are.How much you matter,how perfect you are.Until the day,your games end.Maybe not your life,but that of a friend.With that said,I'll leave you with this.Nothing is as precious,as a loved one's kiss..

I Need Love Too
I need love too,But it can’t be found;I scream forever,But there’s no sound. I search in vain,Where can it be;We all have a soul mate-Why not me. I’m not ugly,Far from it;And yet I feel like,It’s time to quit. Stop searching for someone,I’ll never find;This haunting loneliness,Is blowing my mind. My heart is full,I’m gentle and kind;But my other half,I just can’t find. Are you out there searching,For me as well;Two misguided souls,Living in hell. I won’t settle for less,Than a love meant to be;I won’t cheat myself,From destiny. So I’ll go on seeking,For the love of my life;And until I find him,I’ll face the sorrow and strife.

I Miss You
I Miss You I used to feel so much painIm sorry to say but I can’t picture your face anymore. I Miss You Why don’t I have anymore pain?Is it because I have moved on and let go? I don’t want to let go I want to feel the pain again so I can feel you near and have you in my head. I want to think of you again. I Miss You Have I forgotten you? Time has past me so fast but I haven’t forgotten you. I still will always keep you in my heart and love you. I Miss You I will treasure our beautiful memories in my heart for always and forever. I Miss You So dear.

I Am Someone
I am someoneI walked past a dead faceeven though the person was aliveI saw my eyes in the mirrorand cried at the sightI looked at a person I didnt knowand I met a friendI got heads to turnwhen I walked pastI learned a lot about myselfwhen I lost a new friendI cried every tear in my bodywhen I thought about loveI got hit badthen got back in the ringI climbed a mountain of rocksand saw an eagle fly over- headI heard terrible things about myselfwhen no one thought I was listeningI realized I was strongwhen I didnt cry when it hurtI found out who I waswhen I was with someone elseI thought I was lost foreverwhen a friend found meI held a life in my handand it was my ownI was a pawn in someone else’s gameso I surrendered to a brookI walked the fine line between survivingand not wanting to surviveI still amI am someone

My Angel, My Love
I secretly love you everydayI hide my feelings behind a smileI wish I could tell you the truthbut i don’t say a word. When I first heard your voiceit sent chills to my heartI have never felt this way beforeI knew you had to be the one. I lean on your strengthand your honesty I trustYou brought laughter andhope again in my life. I wish I could wrap you in my arms when the world doesn’t understand my feelings are realand grows stronger everyday. I’ve fallen in love with youand I don’t want to let you goYou’re my reason to live andthe reason I have faith. God gave me you to showme whats real you are my guardian angel fromabove and a secret love!!!!!!

Love Hurts
love hurts roses are black,hearts are blue.my heart is aching,is urs too?people are leaving,leaving me behind.if you'd ask me,thats a huge crime.i once had true love, it was kinda nice.but the guy only used me as dice.love hurts,don't find out the wrong way.so please listen,to what i have to say.love hurts,and hurts,and scars you for life.and when your not looking,it will stab u,with a knife.

To Love You In Silence,
To love you in silence, is to watch you while you sleep. And pray to the lord up above, your heart i could forever keep. To love you in silence, is to think of you everyday. Hoping you’ll soon understand, all that I have to say. To love you in silence, is to glance into your blue eyes. Wishing it was us you see, while holding back my silent cries. To love you in silence, is to memorize your smile. It always seems to take the pain away, at least for a little while. To love you in silence, is to close my eyes and see your face. While hoping and praying, that one day I’ll take her place. To love you in silence, is to hold my pillow at night. Wishing it was you, making love to me under the moon light. To love you in silence, is to sit back and see. If there’s a possibility, you could be silently loving me!!!!

Thats What You Did
You looked me in the eyes, as you stabbed me in the back, you hled my hand as you ripped my heart out, you held me close as you told me it was over, you screamed at me as i reached out for you, you let go of my hand as i fell to the ground, you watched me break as you ended it all, you asked me to leave as i cried in you arms, you walked away as i called out for you , you came back later as i was doing just fine, you tried to fix things as i left you with a broken heart, Just as you deserved RIGHT FROM THE START!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What I'd Do For Her
It's late and tomorrow I'll be tired. Yet tonight i feel you here. I make it one more hour to hear you. You call my name as i drift off. You wonder when we'll meet, i say soon. You wonder if i mean it when i say I'll come, i say yes I try to convince you i love you, your my everything. I know you love me, and your the only one i see. I go through life to know you, to see you. I give it all up to be with you. You ask why i do these things, and i say love. You say i could find better, i say there are none. When will the day come that i can see my love. I would walk there, for her face is my strength. I would fly, for thoughts of her lift me up. all that i know is that she is what i want. therefore i would do anything for her.

Why Did You Leave Me
You were one here but went away.Forever in my heart you will stay.You were the one everyone loved.Now you are the beautiful angel up above.Why did the lord take you away?And leave me alone this way?all alone with nothing to say butThat i miss you more and more Each Day

You Look Like A Angel
You look like an angelas you twirl your hairyou make my heart racejust by standing thereyou dont know what you do to meI dont even think you careits like my world revolves around youI can only stand and starejust seeing your smilecan brighten up the gloomiest dayhearing your laughmakes me wish forever I could stayyou seem totally flawlessexcept the fact that your blindbecause if you cant see I love youthen something's wrong with your mindI want to be yours,combined we could be perfect,but until you realize,I will have to stay secret

Like A Rose
when I need company, you're there when my world turns gray, you care oh! my best and loving LOVE I know i can count on you 'til the end. You're a treasure I must keep That's why you're always in my heart so deep. You're making me believe there's a way Filling my life with colors everyday... I hope that our love will last You're the one who makes me smile so fast So I'm begging you, please don't go... Don't make my life lose it's glow... We have lots of fun and we're doing our best We're always saying "we can do all these", I'll be your crying shoulder when you're lonely and blue Coz I'm your love, so beautiful and true. I'm always here for you no matter what I'll never ever leave you, remember that life's fun as the bond we've made grows Now I know why I should treat you like a rose...

Crying Over You
Forever, you promisedForever, a lieYou promised the moonand the stars in the skysthen you left me aloneyou where so coldit chilled to the boneyou left me with nothingbut tears and a pastwhen you said i love youi though it would lastbut i love you found an endingthe us and we no moreyou said you didn’t mean tobut you hurt me to the coreso i guess i am the losercause you’ue found someone newbut iam still here still all alomeJust Crying Over You!

Would You?¿
If you knew I’d have to leave you one day,Would you still love me the same way?If one day I’d have to go,Would you still say you loved me so? If you knew, one day, we’d be far apart,Would you still have given me your heart?If you knew our love just wasn’t meant to be,Would you still have given up your life for me???????

Would You Number Two
If I woke up tomorrow, And was a totally different person… Would you still love me? If I woke up tomorrow, And was really fat… Would you still think of me as beautiful? And what if I never woke up? Would you know how much you meant to me, Or would you know…. How much Really I love you? And if there was no tomorrow, Would you be able to take my hand… And forget about the past and your past? Because this could all happen; And I just want you to know… That i do in fact, Love you!

Gone Forever
Gone foreverBye, ByeGone foreverSide by side Down that old roadwe goGone foreverso you know We’ll walk all day and walk all nightand find our wayby the morning light Don’t look for usWe’ll be alrightwe’ll be in loveand out of sight!!!!

Given Up
Will he do it?Will he hit me again?I want to moveI want to leaveI can’t I think I Still want to kill him…. Will he enjoy it?Will he hurt me again?I want to screamI want to cryI can’t I think I’m numb inside… Will he beat me?Will he kill me this time?I want to be happyI want to liveI can’t I just want it to end

Goodbye
Good Bye R.I.P fonda. When you dont miss something untill its gone, after you are in limbo. you seem to miss it a lot more, its like there is an emptiness inside of you, a dark hole swallowing you up. you try to get over the things that have been done and said, you try to right the things that were done wrong, but the thing you dont understand, is the things that are already gone, so when you sit there looking around, wondering, pondering about what you could have done differently to make things right. you still dont realize what you had untill it is gone. and now she is gone. now all there is left to say is. goodbye

Suicidel Love
You can't hear her. You can't save her. When you went away, all she thought about was crying. When you said goodbye, she felt like she was dying. You could never see how she felt, because she kept it locked away. You never saw her tears, because she always hid her face. You'll never know her love for you was neverending. You'll never know how much her heart was bending. It hurt her to see you leave, that day she couldn't even breathe. But she knows now that she can be happy without the slightest bit of pain. She knew what she was doing, when she met face to face with the train

Tequila Cake
Tequila Christmas Cake 1-Cup Water 1-Tsb Baking Soda 1-Cup Sugar 1-Tsp Salt 1-Cup Brown Sugar 2-Cups Dried Fruit Lemon Juice 4 Lg Eggs Nuts 1-Bottle Tequila Sample Tequila For Quality (I Already Sampled It...Several Times To Check The Quality) Take A Large Bowl, Check Tequila Again. To Be Sure It Is Highest Quality, Pour One Level Cup And Drink Repeat Turn On The Electric Mixer Beat One Cup Of Butter In A Large Fluffy Bowl Add One Teaspoon Of Sugar. Beat Again At This Point Its Best O Make Sure The Tequila Is Still Okay. Try Another Cup...Just In Case Turn Off The Mixerer Thingy. Break 2 Leggs And Add The Bowl And Chuck In The Cup Of Fruit Pick The Friggin

Whats A Guy To Do But
When it comes to the IRS, whats a guy to do but write to The President of The U.S.A. and inform him that I cannot stimulate the economy like he and others want, due to the IRS's inability to figure out that I used? The very legal document provided by them. Dopes! It will go out minimum Certified, Return Receipt. Meaning it can be Registered. Time to bury or a righteous feuneral for my past. Yes, I will mention and include the very documents of 2008 fiasco by the IRS. Also the other two contacts and what they were about. Yes, I'll mention and include those documents as well. Also the illegal Chpater 7 Bankruptcy with the names of the VA employees but also a Federal Judges and attorney's and the wished upon illegal divorce that never took place. I stopped it and turned into a legal divorce. Congratulations IRS, could of never done such a fantastic job without your blunders. You thank who ever yanked on Mr. Spitz chain because you know I'll mention them all. Norio

Revisit And Far As I Can See
Far as I can see the word Parousia is Greek. Consisting of two Greek words. Someone has placed togeather two Greek words to come up with a modern Greek word based on a questionable source of orignal Greek. Original meaning the letters are within Alpha and Omega. Anything beyond that is a creation of modern invention. Just like Latin, beyond the original is a creation of modern romance. Does not exist. Capital letters only. Some words simply never existed. Modern Latin, you can create anything. Same with modern Greek. I have to revisit my ill health again and hopefully for the last time. This condition suddenly arises within one year. Near death and yet they hold off on surgery. Even with me in the hospital with a Wednesday afternoon surgery they hold off. To die any second and yet more test? Doesn't make much sense? A woman tells me the truth. The truth is that this surgery merely keeps me from dying of a Heart attack and beyond that hopefully ten years of life as it is. Nothing vent

A Little Bit
A little bit of understanding from the Doctor. Realization that I am not up to suicide but taking the necessary steps for health. I just do not see any gain of that significance to go through with it and the dumb ass at the IRS is the main problem. To death I will go, sooner or later, I intend to bury the IRS by it. If the dumb ass wrote other than we want you to prove where you live, like, we want to verify, there is no fight. Ultimately to death and to leave nothing or anyone vague on what happened in good ol NJ and Gloucester County. It's called what? I'm going to die any way and it is right around the corner so lets let everyone from the top on down know of it. Can't forget my harsh critic that started this snow ball down the hill. Norio

Say A Prayer For My Brother!
Say a prayer for my brother..My brother is in intesive care at Hershey Hospital on life support, his body sytem just shot down on him without warning encluding his liver and kidneys, his been in the hospital this whole week..the doctors don't know what causes for his body system and live to shot down, out of the whole intensive care unit my brother is in the worst condintion, last we talked to his doctoc he made it clear that there is nothing that they can do for him, he is gonna die in a few day unless he's own body can heal him self..It's very bad..however there has been good news, been a week since he ate cos his liver and kidneys being shot, but they fed him today through tubes and his kidneys kicked, it is good news cos he is showing recovery signs, his other body parts are starting to function, but there still is bad news, his liver is not responding or showing any signs of recovery yet, despite the fact his kidneys and other body parts are starting to function if his liver don't

The Naughty Night Before Christmas
'Twas the night before Xmas and all through the house The whole damn family was drunk as a louse Grandma and Grandpa were singing a song And the kid was in bed flogging his dong Ma, home from the cat house, and me out of jail Had just crawled into bed for a nice piece of tail When out on the lawn, there arose such a clatter I jumped out of bed to see what was the matterAway to the window I flew like a flash Threw open the shutters and fell on my ass The moon on the crest of the new fallen snow Gave a whore-house-like luster to the objects belowWhen what to my blood shot eyes should appear But a rusty old sleigh and two mangy reindeer With a little old driver a pounding his dick I knew in a moment, it must be Saint NickSlower than snails his reindeer they came He bitched and he swore as he called them by name Now Dancer, now Prancer, up over the walls Quick now, damn it, or I'll cut out your balls.Then up to the roof he stumbled and fell And came down the chimney like a

Nimble
Nimble and quick should death be. Sick as a dog. Nausea, vomiting, and dia whatever all at the same time like in the hospital. In the hospital dia whatever was never there. Nitro didn't do a thing as was the case in the hospital. I have to wonder was all the comotion in the hospital just that, comotion only? Comes back to who has most to gain? Myself, the gain isn't there and let the cards fall where they may. I have people telling me I'm making a mistake and I see something else beside what they see. I have to ask what do they have to gain? New American Version of The Bible I am reading is quite different than the one I had before. This is Roman Catholic so it has the formality of Copy Right under something else. Previous was 1975. My, how the traditional has given way to new wave. Guess, even the Roman Catholic has to keep with the changes. Some think that the worlds ecnomy are being driven down for a reason. Reason being, to force us all into submission of One World Economy and Go

Day Or Two
The physician said day or two and I'd be back but lets go for month or two. Read back and who knows you may find a fine thread to this? Some think that world will end in a nuclear mess and others a total melt down of world economy, followed by One World Economy and a One World Government? I say no to either one. Seems to be something going on. I see something for the unlitmate good but with a lot of pain to get there. Who knows, I don't, because I have almost two feel of snow. Plow man says ETA is one hour? Norio

Couldn't Even Tell You
Eagles win? I couldn't even tell you since I had to see and pay the snow plow man. Lot of snow and I was out there twice. Took Nitro twice on each of those times too. Tomorrow I have to clear out the dryer vent and make sure the furnace vent is clear. Jo-Ann pointed out what I saw so graphically. What's this with surgery when I was in Cooper for six days and nothing was done. Five days for the Nitro and the beta blocker. December 24th to January 6th? "?" Any one get this? Why was Lab Corp good in June and on and suddenly it's not trust worthy? Now the need for a Angiogram on top of it? "?" Get it? What happened to ain't got 8 weeks on January 14th and you don't have this surgery your dead? How many times I have to hear that crap? My sister's telling me "cut the crap" and going no where with it. May work on her husband, children, and whoever she deals with but not on her brother. Curiosity killed the cat but were it not for that curiosity we'd be back in the caves. Sure about the cave

Cancelling My
I'm actually thinking about cancelling my appointment with my Cardiologist and reschedule in two month's. That's provided I'm still around to do so. Jo-Ann is absoultely right in that I wont be able to go the five weeks of doing nothing. Past weekend now of doing nothing because of the snow almost did me in. I can't do the heavy stuff with the snow if I was sick this past Friday and I was in the hospital laying on my butt for almost a week but I did return to my whimpy 10 lbs. weights that following Monday from Cooper. So, this is about the IRS and A to Z? Goes much deeper that that. Find the common thread in all these Blogs. Don't miss the ones you don't know about? All someone has to do is what with the PC? It's easy to get any information on anyone or anything, however, how accurate is it? You pay nothing for it, than it's no better than gossip. We were manipulated. I'm still out here because I can't remeber. ? Norio

Snow
I recommend Wibles Tree Service for snow removal. I never dealt with him in tree service so I do not know. Dave did a great job and so did Clayton, a small town I live in. I did not think that they'd be plowing the street in front of my house because I'm the only one living on this side of it. They did plow it Saturday and more than once. Sunday morning it was clear enough to be passable. This moring the secondary road was packed snow into ice but I had no trouble and I did not see anyone in toruble. Looks like kids got off or late start. I know the Eagles won but the score? Yes I can look it up here but you know something I like the old way, like the news paper. Norio

Eye
Anyone know what is meant by the right eye? Right Eye is often named The Evil Eye and was known as The Right Eye of Horas. My third experience with this eye was again the same as the other two times. This time it was dark in the bed room and it was not my bed room. The Order covers hallucination and Religious or Spirtual Experiences. There is a difference. Since you don't know Horas or why this right eye, beyond what I said, is a waste of time. Cancelled was my appointment and rescheduled and we'll see how far this goes. Some things are just a time waster. Norio

Curiosity Gotthe Best Of Me
Curiosity got the best of me and I went to Netflix to look up Shane to see who starred in it. I thought it was Gary Cooper but as Ernie said it, it was Alan Ladd. I also looked up Mickey Rourke and Robert Di Nero who starred in Angel Heart. Angel Heart I was impressed by and for some reson so was Cheryl. She also likes Ten Commandments as I do. Very odd because she is so different than I am far as music and TV. I spent about two hours with her this morning into this afternoon. Yes, D does not realize the relationship I have with Cheryl is quite different than D or my neighbors think. D, does not know the relationship I have with her children and grandchildren are also different than what some might think. Amazing, Erin leaves a message for me to call to let them know of the status of the surgery and I call after five at that number only to leave a message of no surgery. Nothing further was given by me. Some people get a wrong number from me and since I didn't leave a message stating my

Forbid
God forbid I keep my mouth shut. Mr. Cue, so he claims, working for Liberty Home Improvement calls me and leaves a message. He says he's part of Energy Conservation and the he is Liberty's Financial Officer and that he needs to talk to me about this poject at my house and to call him on the 800 number. So I called him up and he wants me to sign a document stating that I had a side job as a mechanic making so much money to better my Impovement Loans position before the bank. The bank is Domestic Bank out of RI. So I did look up this financial institution to find out that it was a state bank and not a fedral bank. Don't ask me ask them. They did have the mandatory FDIC but the federal entity did not control them. According to this bank my Credit Score was much less than what it was when I purchased my home and the best they could do for me was 14.9%. This is Title 1 Loan and I had to look that up. Title 1 Loan is a second mortgage. For me to sign any document saynig I had a under the ta

Yes I'm Real
For those of you at fubar admin who seem to think I'm not a reap person and seem to wanna verify me just for doing things like rating people and adding new friends I'M REAL. Yes I am a REAL LIVE PERSON. Would an automated spamming program create a blog like this? Think with your brain fubar not with your ass.

Sure Enough
I was looking for something and sure enough Paul sends me an email asking "?" as I wrote back, it was not me but my PC has a back door. Eve is yet over and it is Christmas. Many surprises fell down within the day and as the evening goes into Midnight here. Pope was attacked and what the ladies tell me they are angry at The Catholic Church. I am a Roman Catholic and cannot take part fully in it's sacrament's. Only Pennance and attend The Mass unless condition are met. Myself and The Roman Catholic Church have no problems. Someone 39 years old Graduating from Basic Training. Congratulations, The US ARMY needs the best! He like me is Private E-2. PFC was given to me at AIT and Speck 4 at 275th ENGR CO (ADM). Problem with ADM is that it fell apart on me starting with DAV magazine where Atomic Demolition unit was having a reunion? Reunion from a highly classified unit? The rest was me trying to verify through the Net, NSA, US ARMY, and all I received was blank pages with mistakes in what wa

Thread
Anyone figure out the thread? The target or the audience? My sister tells me not to contact the FBI. My sister gets very upset because I contact my ex wife. Why would my sister even care? I have the same Echo Doppler a year ago and everything is as it was. How do I have severe Heart damadge and all this blockage in one year? Insulin can cause it. I had a fall in Stonybrook. This was not a simple fall and something was wrong with the heating unit in 614. Soot and the flame are two evidence. Unknow to my sister I had already contacted the FBI twice. This divorce was illegal in the beginning until I took actions. Mental Health people were acting illegally in their actions. VA and the DAV got caught with their pants down with an illegal Bankruptcy by me, forced on me. I contacted the IG and General Counsel for Patient Affairs. IRS came after me for absolutely nothing and it was illegal as was the action of me then attorney Ed. Fine thread. Norio

Took Me To Task
Lil, took me to task about my position and said at the end that she hoped she didn't cross the line. I assured her she did not cross the line and that I am open and receptive to all critcisim, oppinion, and also any thought, ideas, philosophy, and this crticisim can be constructive or destructive. I am willing to hear any advice or pehaps sometihng different? I did tell Lil that, she have any children? Mom? Her dogs? There she has three reasons to fight. I did not give up but I am tired of struggling only to end up dead. She agreed that, that is the end. I am tired of the fight that only ends in defeat no matter how good the fight was or was not. The end is the same and if you want to fight you are allowed to but on the other hand if I or another decides we are not going to fight any more the decision is also valid. I am not going around breaking any and all laws. Angry? The anger is the ferosity they came at me to make me look bad when in fact it was me who was bussily trying to tel

Mike
Mike is too reckless and coumbersome to keep. Time to dump Mike for good. Joe became a liability to me on May 13. My sister did not declare any Bankruptcy. Dealership is odd. T is silent when it was Lisa who created the back door. Lis is off the screen. Joined The Order? Put up with their nonsense long enough who knows you may get an Invitation to join? No surgery needed due to changes and a date in the future. Eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth, nail for a nail, and favor for a favor. Thank you S. My hands were tied and could not give you the name but I thank you for the return and will remeber you. He knows he has to show with you and nothing out of the ordinary. Cryptic absolutely! Find the common thread? Curious to see if any will? The fake was the most obvious. FBI? Perhaps the real GRAND MASTER will stand up. Norio

Love We Need
we need love like any other creature in this world as we know it always people will be close to there parents and aunts and uncles cousins and brothers eeryone needs love sme cant find it in these days socity please if this sounds like you speak your mind

Loving Her
In the site of loving myself I begin to love you. . wanting to know what else I could do, The rest of life the peace in mind still trying to see that I can you can love me as I love you. Days can go life slows down. thing is do we really know what can make us happy? What we can do about the hate in our lives? Or even maybe the mess we give ourselves. . No matter what I know you'd be there and I can be there aswell. . Got one thing to ask. . how do you know that this life is what you want? How can you tell if you love someone before knowing the truth and the pain? I can honestly say no need to be in a rush, no need to worry about the life I live, and no need to wonder what if anymore. .

Apartment For Rent (sex Joke)
APARTMENT FOR RENTA prosperous business man propositioned a beautiful girl to spend the night with him. She agreed to do so for $500. When he was ready to leave in the morning, he told her that he didn't have any money with him but that he would have his secretary write a check for it and make it out as "rent for an apartment." On the way to the office, he decided that the whole thing wasn't worth the price he had agreed to pay. So he advised his secretary to send the check for $250 and include the following note: -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Dear madam: Enclosed is my check in the amount of $250 for rent of your apartment. I am not sending the amount I agreed upon, because when I rented the apartment, I was under the impression: 1. That it had never been occupied. 2. That there was plenty of heat. 3. That it was small. Last night, I found that it had been occupied, there wasn't any heat and it was entirely too large. -=-=-=-=

Just Another Day.
So it is the New Year, officially. 2009 is behind us, all of 2010 is in front of us with all the wonders it will bring. Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, sounds nice, but in reality IT IS JUST ANOTHER DAY. Still have life, bills, issues and other stuff to deal with. So you enjoy your NEW YEAR, but after the novelty wears off....you will realize that it is.......JUST ANOTHER DAY.

Stressing Out!!
Well today I had to find a way where it wont cost me too much to get from here to lax which is a 4hour drive that wont cost too much. what a delema! now im pack and ready to go now i need is get some zzz's and putt some songs on my mp3 player for a very long trip a head of me see you all later and ill talk to you soon

Po Box
PO Box in Clayton, NJ I normally receive mail from Rep. LoBiondo but yeserday was mail from Rep. Andrews office with a label made out to me. Apparently I have two reps in DC, well that's good as we all should. Whoever is very bad at any lies because they don't know what is the truth. I'd be happy to tell any the truth. Try a little harder and be a gentle ladies and a gentle men with ethics and honesty within and with out. Lier are not wanted in the this world or another. Norio

Monday January 4
Going to TEXAS from Cali! So my day started like this 0100am trying to go to bed couldn't cause i had to meet my shuttle at 0330 could not sleep so i stayed up on here on fubar wowo addicted! lol so i got to lax at 0745 and my flight wasn't till 0910 so was there early then i looked down the line of ppl who was late to there flights the ling was from terminal one which is southwest airlines and united airways to terminal two. was a huge like seemed that it was like an hour wait in line right as i get to the door of the security line to get in the building i got stopped by a lady she said i need to go check my bags in the bag line i was like what?@!? okay so i got in that line took 40 mins to get to the counter not so bad. Weight my bad thinking im good cause online they said i got 70lbs for my luggage so i was like i only have 67 lbs so im good when the guy was like its going to be $50 more for that bag and i was like excuse me he said well your bag is 18lbs over weight i was like wow.

Egg And A Dare To You
Since you egged me on I turn around and egg and dare you. I was told on february 20th of last year that I had 50/50 chance of making it the year I dare you all Feds, State, Our Lady of Lourdes, Cooper, all the physicians ,and whoever that your gods and all of you are worthless against my God. When I wake up on the 21st of this coming February may all that was intended for me fall upon you all and to quicken this on, your behalf I will cut back and stop taking the beta blocker on your within fives days. I say your gods and you are worthless againsy my God. My God is The Judge Norio

Am I A Freak?
I often wonder if being a Dominant makes me a freak? I don't hide it because personally if people cannot accept who I am they don't need to be my friend. Many misunderstand the lifestyle but its more than just sex its a deeper love and trust that attracted me to it. If it means I am a freak than so be it but at least I am a happy freak hehe......

Soul & Heartless
I'm the most wicked insane juggalo you never heard of. I puts its down way burrying ya into the ground. 6 feet deep no creep have ya falling off at ur leap. What yo soul you soul to no keep regardless. How you start this to kick with some full mount of piss you diss i dismiss. & ain't whether if you on some shit to try to get yourself fuck delt wit. I'm just as crazy as known insane dementia of what i put in ya. I'm to miscomplicated you straight hated incubated none stated you just faded none equally created. Plauged with sress wit pressed it mishanded. I can't stand it. I'm losing to feel crazed brainless such a mess in a one contest none be the best i'm so fresh. I can kick spit better then the rest. & it ain't no reason to feel on sucess. Cuz to many fucker's are just without they soul & heartless cuz motherfuckers are just to sold what is told niggaz is just to soul & heartless none like the rest shoot 'em down rip they heart out they chest. What they bear now all i ask is wave yo

Driving To Home Depot
so yesterday was going good i was just chillen having a great time when i had to go to home depot which ive never been around here in texas so guess there is a few more here okay well i had to pick one that was a supplier then i got lost needless to say i was driving for 4 hours to go 5 mile from my mom's house to get to home depot when i got there i was like so fustrated at the gps which sucked and my mom for being stupid and not telling me where to go cause i had no idea where to go around where she lives. awwww yesterday bites !

Seniority
Any one know what seniority is in the job place within Federal, State, Municipal, Union, and even in the Military? Here is one. In Gloucester County, NJ there is a position named, County Veterans Affairs Officer or something similar to that. Man is named Romeo or something. He had the position while back at a salary and then went to NJ State EPA and came back to the same position at the salary from the EPA at around 87k. Why is that? It has something to do with seniority. I have a friend Cheryl who works for the state and who is on medical leave. Never in my life have I seen the run around and blocks she has received not only from the state where she works but also the union that represents her. The people where she works do not understand what seniority is or this one in Gloucester County got over didn't he? Norio

Why Would My Sister Fall Silent
Why would my sister fall silent? I've not only cut the biostolic but stopped the aspirin. The 2.5 are being saved so that they can be cut in half. I have dead lines to meet and I want the scale in the favor of Dr. Viswanath and others. I want their prophesy of me to beocme a reality. In order for me to consider any hospital everyone has to be known to me with pic and all personal information so I can go public with it. From A to Z and all your personal information in the public. From the stranger, strange woman waving good bye, and to who ever was dumb enough to place in my PO Box political literture of Rep. Andrews because I'm in a different district to Liberty. Oh, start the cycles and vehicles. Public. Norio

How Birds Got Thier Wings
how birds got their wings A long time ago God had a great many burdens that He wished to have carried from one place to another on Earth. He asked the animals to lend a hand, but all of them had excuses for not helping: the elephant was too dignified; the lion, too proud; and so on . . . Finally the birds came to God and said, "If you will tie the burdens into small bundles, we'll be glad to carry them for you. We are small, but we would like to help." So God fastened upon the back of each bird a small bundle, and they all set out walking across the plain to their destination. They sang as they went, not minding the weight of their burdens at all. Every day the burdens seemed lighter and lighter, until the loads seemed to be lifting the birds, instead of the birds carrying the burdens. When they arrived at their destination, they discovered that when they removed their loads, there were beautiful wings in their place. Wings that enabled them to fly to the tree tops and soar through t

My Nurses
I don't want to hear anything negative have happened to my nurses in either hospitals! I take that personal. Single candle lit to illuminate the path I must follow. It led me to my sister. Showed me calmness. I am open and receptive to the future. My sister like another believes I am making a mistake. I maybe but at this juncture I remain the same. I experienced a almost feeling of death late this morning and early afternoon. It culminated in me loosing counciousness and to awake 20 minutes later as if I was stunned. I am a member of Humanity and also The Order. Many will quit because of loss of interest and too much occult. I do not mess with the occult for the simple reason it is negative to Humanity and to The Order. 21 was the number of us that started way back. I alone remain. Telemitsu asked for the second meeting. He better deliver her undamged and be on time. Someone is waiting in West Africa for me. Someone is supposed to be here now and will come looking for me. I may ch

Cast
lord, Your move. The shadow was cast on you. I hold my position for now. This back door is a sore spot because of the email I may send could be carrying a surprise. Someone caught it. Email had deleted itself. How is that possible? Something was written on it to delete itself. I'm not healing as I should by what I see, however, there are other signs that tell me of an Auto Immune disease. The First Trime, the base was a Virus in all three dreams. Federal Police came up with he has no convictions, priors, wants and warrants, he didn't do anything. He asked, doc what do you want us to do, just tell us. All I heard was silence. He's the guy that lost hes house to the mental health people. Not only that ladies, I lost Tiger and Sheeba to death and my wife to oblivion. Mr. Martin Gievers was the man in charge with hes White Dodge Durango. Frank says you want my Field Glasses because I told him of them waiting out there in the back. Waiting for me to disappear into the night or a girl f

What's Going On?
I've been sitting in fubar listening to a few people complain about the rules. I admit sites have to have rules, but for god sake we're all adults here. I've created a site for all people 18+ to enjoy, i call it..... Social Jungle. I built this site with the goal to not steal members from other sites, but to provide an exciting social experience for those who seek it, without the hassle of strict rules and guidelines. Let me give you some of my background, I've been doing web/graphics design for about almost 9 years in August 2010. I do own my own hosting company known as SiteMax-Hosting, which provides affordable web hosting & shoutcast services. I've also dj'ed online for several well-known radio sites and soon retired from the dj scene in late 2009.

Hey You This Is Me....
Am not that great looking girl....I find myself also not sexy....But there are man that see a lot of things that i don't can see...What there reason also me be....It comes always from me....Am still looking for new people and to have new friends...Not for a sexdate or to fall in love with...I have already a man in mine life...We did and we never will go to marry...I am the one that not wanne marry either so there will never comes a man in mine life That is going to think she goes to marry me....Than there is a big problem mine answer will always be NO...You can always dream about anyone...To do what ever you wanne do in your dreams...

Unfuckwitable
I'm unfuckwitable best to check your shit. Cuz i'm wrecking it. No need for cause drag your body down the halls slammin heads on the walls. Push shove ya in the stall. What calls for creepy calls. Like night calls & ya don't know who's calling hit ya hard in between the railing. While yo ass goes sailing like wailing but i'm not wayland smithers nor bill hither get the pussy with the quivers heh ha. I'm undamaged running rampant wild going on a rampage fuck age in rage let loose out the cage feel the wrath of my plauge. & ain't nothing to loose with such stainable containable uncontrollable insane with flow so here we go cuz i'm unfuckwitable hittin with mad wicked flow so go cuz i'm unfuckwitable spittin such wicked shit. I'm just as overly crazly jabbing stabbing ya in yo abodomen. Rhyme is perfect you think i'm worth it. How would ya want me to be. The crazy insane wicked demented persona or just this plain type of nigga you'd never figured. You not getting the pictured. It was neve

Difference Between You And I
The difference between you and I are very clear to me. I don't care who you are, be it the FBI, Secret Service, USPS Postal Inspectors, IRS, or anoyone else, I took an oath that is very unique and obviously you all did not. I will not only protect and defend The United States of America and The United States Constitution but give up everything I have and am, receive torture and all and even give up my life before any sitting or not President takes a fall for me. I will protect The Commasnder and Chief. Read Admiral and Lt. Colonel both did the right thing as I would and do now. I will place my neck and all I am on the chopping block before the Presdient of The United States ever goes any where to say publiclly The Buck Stops with him. Yeah, that's the difference and there is a twist to my oath. Any woman to turn me away from my future better be the best because I've met a awful lot of Beautiful Ladies of all different ages, races, and none has done that yet. The Order and TMO is not

Police Harassment
Recently the Chula Vista (CA) Police Department ran an e-mail forum (a question And answer exchange) with the topic being, "Community Policing." One of the Civilian e-mail participants posed the following question, "I would like to Know how it is possible for police officers to continually harass people and Get away with it?"From the "other side" (the law enforcement side) Sgt. Bennett, obviously a Cop with a sense of humor replied:"First of all, let me tell you this...it's not easy. In Chula Vista, we Average one cop for every 600 people. Only about 60% of those cops are on General duty (or what you might refer to as "patrol") where we do most of Our harassing."The rest are in non-harassing departments that do not allow them contact With the day to day innocents. And at any given moment, only one-fifth of The 60% patrollers are on duty and available for harassing people while the Rest are off duty. So roughly, one cop is responsible for harassing about 5,000 residents."When you toss i

Still Here For
I am still here for the fifty third week in my life. today I'm feeling muh better. I took care of different businesses that I had to. I am working on the things I have to take care of in my life. I can go off and party and forget all or be depressed and in bed and never come out. I'm not doing that. Only thing I am doing far as change is more moderation as in weight taining. I took off this week and I will resume on Monday at slightly less aggresive mode. Also, I cut the beta blocker in half and still taking it along with the aspirin. No I never cursed God but felt an immense anger toward God. I deal with these anger here and other places by looking at what happened in my life. Question those events and also the motivation of myself and others. Were it not for God, I wont be here to key anything. Norio

Subject
Subject line reads, subject. I'm the subject to be considered. If I cheated you, lied to you, beat you, tried to kill you ,or in fact I have done so, please do me in. I did read, listen, and watch a whole lot of nonsense in my life. That's this life and no other. If you go back to the Mosaic Laws things were dealt with awful lot of harshness. If I committed Adultry against you please take me out and stone me because according to that law both male and female were taken out of camp and stoned to death. This stoning was started by the oldest and did not stop until both were dead. They were left out until almost sunset and then buried in a unmarked grave. Since I am the one that did the above and more, please take me out and stone me and I will go willingly. If you got nothing on me why hunt? The more you hunt the more I will remeber. The more I remember closer to the future I become. There is a passage by The Lord where He states, wow to those that seek for The Day of The Lord. Your not

We All Deal With
We all deal with prejudice of one kind or another. I know I have and still do. Cheryl has a prejudice, although, she says she does not. I know that often she doesn't feel well because I am like that. She tries her best with me, however, she has never been with a white man and I'm almost white. I am not like that but am open to any woman, no matter what her racial back ground is. Even with the age I am open as long as she is 18. Far as religion, I am, again, open while others seem hell bent. Went to D's house to return the thing she gave me for my neck. She's not home but I'm invited in. Wont you know it an outsider, meaning not of the house hold says a racist thing against me. I could of easily responded but held my tounge for the sake of D who was not there and for the respective family members of her that was present. Certainly for the sake of children. I live in a predominantly Afro American area. While back I would get the looks from some of the white ladies because I can kiss an

Self Inflicted Misery
Lately I've been kicking myself in the ass. I often wonder how stupid I can get...why I've made some of the decisions I have in my life, and then realizing ultimately that all of this is simply self inflicted misery for which there is no coming back from. Sometimes I find myself hating the things I've said, the things that I've done that layed any doubt. Yet I can't change it. And it pisses me off to no end. Seems like no matter what I do to keep from hurting people, someone always ends up getting hurt and its pissing me off. I'm tired of crying myself to sleep, wondering how I can fix things, feeling like a complete and total fool. But I should. I did it. Repeating actions I swore to myself I'd never do again. It's hard though. Especially now. With trying to get everything lined up for college, the one you love is so far away you can't do anything to help when they need you, realizing that you could have been there when she did and because of a day worth of stupidity, fucking that up.

Names
I remeber the names. Fred R. Fowler Sp/5. Stanley C. Hawkins Sp/4, and it was Fred and I, who moved my deak out to COMMO. Why was that done? Was it because of sympathy for me? Material I handled required the security of where I was. How long was I down there alone? Couple of days, couple of weeks, couple of months, or was it way too long? Those that returned noted the difference in me. All I remeber was the first entry. Another where I'm wondering, is this some type Military Experiment, The last of SSG looking for me, to see, if I was all right. Did that even happen? I should just name your wife, Stanley and the Captin's wife and the rest of it. All that did not require the threat of that woman at WRAMC. Fred did you answer my letters and why did I write the final letter to the unit? It was written because no one replied to the other three. Norio

I Will Say This
Today we honor Doctor King so I wont go into great detail but I will say this regarding Haiti. I'm sick and tired of every one bad mouthing my country, The United States of America. No, we may not of have been the first in Haiti but we are the ones taking care of business there because everyone else is such a lame asses that all they can do is look pretty in formation and nothing much else. Every where I went, they liked the USD but hated us. You know what, like it or not, were it not for The USA, nothing good would of happened and never will in this world because we being The USA, even with this insane separation is about God. Norio

You Really Think
Do you really think that I am against God? I would say that is my facade or a veil. There is also this appearance of freedom to choose. There is a small amount but most of us have to choose lesser of evil. I know I had to do this often in my life. My decisions were often flawed because I did not fully understand why and what of this decison. How do I fight God that I do not know? Who can say to me God is here or there? Define to me, God is this or that? I do wish there were more people who truly knew to guide not only me but others to God. Only thing I and others have left is The Bible and other so called sacred books. Religion or church is often limited because doctrine and buildings do not say, tell, or save you from anything. Only those that have been gifted by God can lead. Norio

West
West, did we not go to the same school? Same MOS, Military Occupational Specialty Code of O5B20? Morsee Code Radio Operator? You were in the class ahead of mine and grauated didn't you? How many groups did we have to accurately copy? How many letter to a group? What about numbers? How did we have to write these letters and numbers? No, as I said, I never did Teletype. Far as these photos and anything I remember, may be bogus? Cheryl did not let me finish because she immediately took offense. I was trying to tell you. We talk 5 to 6 times a day now but soon it will become 5 to 6 times a week, then 5 to 6 times a month, then 5 to 6 times a year, and you never know I maybe gone sooner than planned. Joyce no plan, only plan is the one you have or another has created. I never had a plan of any kind. Surgery is no. Forget the idea completely. I'm out and I sit on the bench. Norio

How Did I Do That
I thought I had an appointment with Jo-Ann on Friday but it was yesterday. I caught it as I sat here past 1:30 PM and looked at the calendar. I called her immediately and left a message of my apology. Going on same time a day later and I've yet to hear from her. She's either busy or out. Now I wonder how did I do that? I consider myself no longer a member of The Order. The Brotherhood and such I recant my membership. I do not agree with the fundamenrtal principle of them. That being said, I can walk or run all I want. Their influence is in everything. I stay put and try to avoid a confrontation with them. What I have sworn, a promise, oath, vow, and it became a contract, I know that I can avoid but will end with my fulfilment of it. I cannot refuse them because they will send someone to carry it out. May God have mercy on us all. Norio

Redneck Pick Up Lines
1. Did you fart? Cuz you just blew me away. 2. Are your parents retarded? Cuz ya sure are special. 3. My love fer you is like diarrhea. I can't hold it in. 4. Do you have a library card? Cuz I'd like to check you out. 5. Is there a mirror in yer pants? Cuz i can see myself in em. 6. If you was a tree and i were a squirrel, I'd store my nuts in yer hole. 7. You might not be the best lookin girl here, but beauty's only a light switch away 8. I know I'm not no Fred Flintstone, but i bet I can make yer bed rock. 9. I can't find my puppy, can you help me find him? I think he went into this cheap motel room. 10. Yer eyes are as blue as window cleaner. 11. If yer gunna regret this in the mornin, we kin sleep til afternoon 12. Yer face reminds me of a wrench. Looking at you makes my nuts tighten up!!

Sealed
Today was sealed by your action and inaction of Yesterday. Tomorrow is sealed by your action or inaction of Today. What you sow that you reap, a Universal Law that none can defy. Sabbath Day is the day of rest where no work, even to come togeather for anything, except emergency, can be done, but to Worship God humbly in where we reside. Most obvious is emergency, flush the toilet, and others. To congregate for worship is work. To seek The Glory of God alone or with family members is different as is tending to the flock or animals you may have.

My Little Mesage
Say i'm disrespectful then fuck you. Wanna beef with me fuck you. Got a problem with what i say in my rhymes or with what i'm sayin fuck you. Say i'm not fine fuck you. You don't think i'm wicked or get with it fuck you. Do whatever you wanna do. Be on about your way. Keep cool not less pretend to be a fool fuck you nigga fuck you bitch fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you. I don't need off to skeet hit with one hooks. Read books & try to come with a chorus. Like if my name was boris but i ain't a fucking taurus. I'm an aries they say i'm ego-headed. Shit for you ain't likely to be good for you. Where your headed right. I get despite for my looks. Like i ain't enough to like. Whats with shit to write. I'm only being right. Cuz my shit is tight. I say a whole bunch of knowledgeables & qoutables. Shit that wasn't unbelievable impossible amicable unstoppable. Keeps it bout my way & wicked horror fresh so fine & sexxxii. Wickedest killa way illa then i'ma dealer. I'm on the find to look fo

Written For Charlene Greer R.i.p. Mom
SCREAMS I WANT TO BE IN YOUR MIND, BODY & SOUL..AND IN YOUR HEART AND LOVE YOU MORE THAN A DREAM COULD EVER BE IN THE DEEPEST SLEEP OF ANYONES NIGHT WITH MY FACE PRESSED UP AGAINST A GLASS WINDOW WANTING THAT OLD LIFE BACK SO BAD BUT ITS SO FAR OUT OF REACH DEEPER THAN ANY OCEAN BLUE LEAVING ME LOST LIKE A FLOWER WITHOUT RAIN....LIKE A THUNDERSTORM WITHOUT LIGHTNING...I WANNA LIVE AND NOT JUST EXSIST AND IT IS ALL MORE THAN A DREAM TO ME ...CAN I GO ON WITHOUT MY SCREAMS?AND BE HAPPY? WITHOUT YOU? OR WILL MY LIFE REMAIN THE CIRCUS LIFE THAT IT IS IN THIS HELL THAT I MADE FOR MYSELF BUT WHEN YOU DIED THE FIRE CAME ALIVE AND AND BECAME THIS ROARING BLAZE THAT IS SO INSANE HAVE YA EVER FORGOT WHO WHO U ARE?AND I MEAN TO THE POINT WHERE YOU GET DIZZY AT TIMES AND SCARED LIKE SOMEONE HAS A GUN TO YOUR HEAD? I HAVE ....ANXIETY IS WHAT IT IS AND ITS NO FUN .........I MISS THE OLD DAYZ WHEN THINGS MEANT SOMETHING AND LOVE WAS SO ALIVE EVEN THOSE LIL 2 DAY CRUSHES YA KNOW LO

Prez Wising Up?
It is nice to see the President finally on the way to making a good decision. Hopefully he put KSM back into a military tribunal where he belongs. Now if he can listen to the American people about the debt...we may be on to something.

Ben Dover Is Back!
CHATSWORTH, CA - PURE PLAY MEDIA presents the infamous Ben Dover in his newest release from Bluebird Films, Ben Dover's Busty Babes In The USA, Act 1. Ben Dover is taking USA's horniest top-heavy hotties on a wild ride...they may never be the same after enjoying this randy man! Enjoy Bluebird's beloved Ben Dover's Busty Babes In The USA, the stellar 2-disc set is available now! "Bluebird Films' Ben Dover Series is an on-going fan favorite. It is my distinct pleasure to present the latest edition, Busty Babes In The USA," Pure Play Media CEO, Richard Arnold, Commented. "This is guaranteed to be a top seller for retailers featuring some of the most know busty babes like Brooke Haven, Amy Azurra and Candy Mason." Break out the bourbon and lie in the hay. Ben Dover plays the diplomat in this All American/UK Busty Babe adventure. Interviewing babes from all over the USA, Ben Dover and his buddies fuck till the cows cum home.

Tanner Mayes Eyes Multiple Awards In 2010
LOS ANGELES, CA - Twenty year old Tanner Mayes has taken the adult industry by storm in her first year. The raw, unbridled energy and passion that she puts into her scenes has been noticed by fans and critics alike, as Tanner has received numerous Best New Starlet awards and other nominations. Tanner has been recognized by the Adult Entertainment Broadcast Network (AEBN), the world's largest video on demand site, as most downloaded new starlet. Tanner also recently won Best New Starlet by the Cyberspace Adult Video Reviews (CAVR). In addition she was nominated by Hot D'ors 2009 Best New American Starlet and has been nominated by XBIZ as their Best New Starlet. Tanner will be attending the upcoming Adult Entertainment Expo and Adult Video News (AVN) Awards in Las Vegas shows. She has been nominated for Best All-Girl Group Sex Scene, Best New Starlet, and several of the releases in which she stars are up for nominations; including Best Internal Release "Don't Cum Inside Me", Best All-S

Savanna Samson Meets Fans On Long Island
Savanna Samson fans based on Long Island have a chance to meet the Vivid Entertainment Group star Thursday, Feb. 11 at Peek a Boo Lingerie in Farmingdale, N.Y. The star, who is a native of upstate New York, will be available from 8 to 11 p.m. to mingle with fans, up close and personal. Savanna Samson movies and novelties will be available for purchase, and Samson will autograph for fans' private collections.

Day 14- Best Quote Ever
See the hills from afar Standing on my beat up car The sun went down and the night fills the sky Now I feel like me once again As the train comes rolling in Smoked my boredom gone Slapped my brains up so high - Greenday

3d Porn? New Sensations Sez, 'why Wait?'
Octopussy was certainly one of the worst James Bond movies ever made, even with Maud Adams as the female lead and Kristina Wayborn as her No. 1 assistant-which only made it that much more ripe for parody. And who better to give it a shot than New Sensations, which scored three Best Parody noms going into the 2010 AVN Awards show? But the scions at NS have taken this parody to the next level: It's in 3D! "We've teamed up with a company called Funky Monkey Media; they do strictly 3D productions," said New Sensations publicist Janeen Gensen. "The gentleman who owns Funky Monkey has been involved in doing mainstream 3D products for quite a while. He has moved into doing adult, so the first release that's going to come out is a play off of the James Bond movie Octopussy. I think that means we'll be the first ones to have a 3D feature out in the market." Octopussy 3D was helmed by a newcomer to adult, Funky Monkey's Jay Lalls, and stars Audrey Bitoni in the title role-though we're guessin

Often So Loud
It seems myspace does not wish for me to post certain document's. Often it is so loud, it is an afront to me and others. Someone came to look to give me an estimate. One mistake, bedroom. He said to me your going to make this attic into a bedroom. I never told him what I was doing and he nver asked but just blurted it out. Ya think he and others read my crap here and over yonder? Sleep well? Norio

The Airport Trilogy
Your plane finally arrives and I stand at the end of the jetway, waiting for you with butterflies in my stomach. I watch as the passengers all leave the plane and I wonder where you are, when I see you coming up at the rear of the crowd. My heart rate increases as you get closer and my jaw drops when I finally get a good look at you. I can't help but stare at your barely there top with your very short skirt. The tops of your black, thigh-high stockings barely covered by the hem of your skirt reveals, barely, the straps of your garter belt. For a moment, I stand rooted to the spot and speechless as my eyes roam over your beautiful body. Then, you leap into my arms, kissing me deeply, and I try to raise my arms to hold you close but I'm stopped as my hand brushes across you and I realize that you aren't wearing panties beneath your skirt. The desire that washes over me makes me forget where I am and who is around us as I lift your shirt and lower my lips to your lovely breast. With no re

The Horseback Ride
I come in from working in the yard in nothing but my jeans and boots, mychest gleaming in a light sheen of sweat, and I catch your eye as you standby the sink in one of my flannel dress shirts. Just seeing you looking sosexy makes me weak in the knees and I walk over to you, pulling you tightagainst me as I kiss you long, slow, and deep. Your hands slide down mychest and dip into the waistband of my jeans and I gasp at your touch beforebreaking our kiss and walking back out the door. You frown in confusion,grab a very short skirt, and follow me out the door to find out what's goingon. Outside, you find me standing beside a horse that's all saddled andbridled and I gesture for you to mount up. You look down at your clothes theback at me, as if to say, "What are you kidding? I can't ride in this." Isimply smile mischievously at you and say, "Don't worry about it, baby.Climb on up." You look at me doubtfully then hesitantly slip your foot intothe stirrup. I groan as I catch sight of your

Valentine's Day
You get home from some grocery shopping to find my car gone and you wonder where I'd gone. you come in to put the groceries away and find a note from me on the refrigerator door. "There are some gifts for you on the bed," it says. "Go ahead and open them and be sure to follow the instructions I've left for you. You'll enjoy it, I promise. I love you." You head upstairs and find a couple of boxes waiting for you.You open the box on top to find a pair of black stiletto heels. Setting that box aside, you open the next one to find some very sexy black lingerie. Inside is a note telling you to put on the lingerie, but to not open the next box until you have. You wonder at what I'm up to, but go ahead and put on the half-cup bra that leaves your nipples exposed, the matching garter belt and the thigh-high stockings. You notice that I've neglected to put a pair of panties in the box for you and you wonder again as to what I have planned for this wonderful Valentine's Day. You open the last bo

The Picnic
We load up the car and I put the picnic basket in the back with a wink toyou and a quick warning not to peek. You giggle and brush your hand againstthe front of my jeans, making me gasp as your eyes widen at how hard I am atthe moment. I open the car door for you and you climb in as I walk around tothe driver's side. We drive out to a secluded spot I know of and I noticethat you can't seem to keep your hand out of my lap. By the time we reachour picnic spot, I'm dying to get you stripped down to make love to you. Ipull the basket out of the car and lay down the blanket before pulling youtight against me and kissing you passionately, my hands massaging andcaressing your breasts. We slowly lower ourselves to the blanket withoutbreaking our kiss and one hand slips from inside your shirt to slide downand caress your pussy through your pants. I hear you start moaning and Ismile before pulling your shirt off of you.I reach into the basket and pull out a bottle of chocolate syrup with amische

Cebu Escort Services And Nightlife Information.
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Best Massage And Escort Services In Cebu City,philippines
Massage and Escorts in Cebu City,Philippines.Everything you need in One Package! Let our Massage Ladies entertain and take you on a pleasant and unforgetable day,evening and night. For all your occasions,such as events,parties,travelling,sight seeing and more.Our Male and Female Escort and Massage available upon your request. King's Massage Cebu City Philippines im_onthe_line@yahoo.com Tel. # : ( 032) 5833 453 Cellphone: +63927 2877 743

Broken Hands
I can feel your fear and weaknessI see my own in the mirrors of your eyesCaught into a corner, hopelessNear death ahead and truth behindThere's a bad storm blowing inAnd most of us won't make itThe wreckage of your pastMeans nothing now, forsake itThe memories cripple youYou're torn apart, your dumb mistakeIt only fell apart 'cause you let itBlood of all you had to losePick up the pieces with your broken handsIt only fell apart 'cause you live in itBlood of all you had to losePick up the pieces with your broken handsWell, there's those that doAnd those that just do talkin'We're all going through hellLet's burn or keep on walkin'The bigots sink their shipsAnd fuel death riding the windRight now it's do or dieHow will you choose to live?The memories that ruined youYou're torn apart, your dumb mistakeIt only fell apart 'cause you let itBlood of all you had to losePick up the pieces with your broken handsIt only fell apart 'cause you live in itBlood of all you had to losePick up the pieces

2010 Census
WARNING: 2010 Census Cautions from the Better Business Bureau GOOD INFORMATION TO PASS ON TO EVERYBODY THAT YOU KNOW: 2010 Census to Begin WARNING: 2010 Census Cautions from the Better Business Bureau Be Cautious About Giving Info to Census Workers by Susan Johnson With the U.S. Census process beginning, the Better Business Bureau (BBB) advises people to be cooperative, but cautious, so as not to become a victim of fraud or identity theft. The first phase of the 2010 U.S. Census is under way as workers have begun verifying the addresses of households across the country. Eventually, more than 140,000 U.S. Census workers will count every person in the United States and will gather information about every person living at each address including name, age, gender, race, and other relevant data. The big question is - how do you tell the difference between a U.S. Census worker and a con artist? BBB offers the following advice: ** If a U.S. Census worker knock

Mr. Meyer
It would of been better for Stonybrook to settle than for you Mr. Meyer as an Attorney to tell me no one would be happy if I filed a Civil Suit. Would you like to hear yourself? Mr. Winkler as a perspective Attorney, you had it going until you decided to really open you mouth, didn't you, because I'm all for letting everyone know about me and all, aren't you curious a bit? I am. Sleep very well tonight and every night? Norio

What Is Truly Within
I see, I hear, I thinkThe things I wantThe things I needIf only to succeedI want a lifeA life a love A life of happinessJust a lifeTo watch, To see, To knowAll others happiness flowTo look at what they haveTo notice what i dontIndiscribable emotionsNew experiences never feltTo want To dreamOnly to see true reality.

Over Heard
This morning as I walked into my favorite PO, I overheard a convesation that went like this. "This guy's nothing but trouble." You got the positions, authority, and the power, you better use it wisely as possible, without flaunting in the face like your above all. I don't think someone is quite that crazy to place something in my restricted PO Box but others at your level might be. Just a joke, right? Joke is a joke, however, a crime is a crime. Last week I had a rather unusual Cardaic Cath. Two hours knocked out while former President Clinton is wide awake as I was over a year ago and in 2002. Joke is a joke, however, a crime is a crime. Glory to God Norio

Awake
AWAKESleep doesn’t come so easilyFor those of us with fearThe mind wont rest from worryThe thoughts and pain don’t clear.I close my eyes, try not to listenBut the senses become strongEvery noise makes my heart jump*Sigh*, the nights seem so very long.I keep looking at the clock as the hours pass awayWanting dawn to comeSo that my fears can go astray.I’ll lie my head down once againAnd try to block it outThen finally give up, throw my blankets off and shout…“Ive had it, I can’t take it!!”God I wish that I could sleepLose myself in peaceful slumberInstead I sit awake and weep…And when light shines through my windowAnd I see I made it through the nightI feel the worry was for nothingNot fear, but paranoi was my fight…Perhaps tonight Ill restPerhaps Ill even dreamOf a life that is so contentA soul that’s happy, unlike meBut for now, my fear controls meAnd my fear, it has a nameIt is He who I give intoWhile he plays his selfish

This Is Funny
Eddie wanted desperately to have sex with the hot girl at work, but she had a boyfriend. One day Eddie got so desperate that he went to her and said, "I'll give you a $100 if you'll let me have sex with you." The girl looked at him shocked and said "Hell no!" He said "I'll be real quick-I'll throw the money on the floor, you bend over to get it, and I'll be finished by the time you've picked it up!" She thought for a moment and told him that she would have to talk to her boyfriend. So she called him and explained the situation. Her boyfriend says, "Ask him for $200. Pick up the money really really fast, and he won't even be able to get his pants down!" She agreed and accepts the proposal. 30 minutes go by and the boyfriend is still waitin for his girlfriend's call. Finally, after 45 minutes, the boyfriend calls and asks, "What the fuck happened?" Still breathing hard she managed to reply, "That bastard had all QUARTERS!!!!"LMAO!

Report
Service Master wanted a review from me regarding the estimtes I asked for. Two came and gave me a fair estimate and they received a good report from me and possibly being used to do what I want. One came out for a different estimate and never gave me an estimate. This one recieved a bad review. I suppose he came to look at my house and you know what maybe even to rob me. One never knows with these people. Norio

Same Physician
I have an appointment with the very same physician tomorrow to sign documents for him to do this surgery but he told me the last time we met that "I refuse to do this surgery if you continue to smoke." "Why go through all this if you continue to smoke?' Why see me again if I am still smoking? Last time I ckecked it was still legal to smoke in the USA and in NJ? Make it illegal the entire country and it's possesions and DC as well. Don't forget the world. since we lead the world with our very high tech abilities in Heart Illness and Cancers. Do you think it is our water or our meat, that is the problem? Peole from the globe don't have these illness like us until they live here. Unless they're part of something and I'm not, like the rest. Since that Cardiac Cath of March 2, 2010, I have gone down hill and very ill. What happened during the two hours I was unconcious? Did you do something or did you make a mistake? Since the man said we're going to knock you out, it was intended wasn't it

I Am One Of The Searchers
"I am one of the searchers. There are, I believe, millions of us. We are not unhappy, but neither are we really content. We continue to explore life, hoping to uncover its ultimate secret. We continue to explore ourselves, hoping to understand. We like to walk along the beach, we are drawn by the ocean, taken by its power, its unceasing motion, its mystery and unspeakable beauty.We like forests and mountains, deserts and hidden rivers, and the lonely cities as well. Our sadness is as much a part of our lives as is our laughter. To share our sadness with one we love is perhaps as great a joy as we can know - unless it be to share our laughter.We searchers are ambitious only for life itself, for everything beautiful it can provide. Most of all we love and want to be loved. We want to live in a relationship that will not impede our wandering, nor prevent our search, nor lock us in prison walls; that will take us for what little we have to give. We do not want to prove ourselves to another

R.i.p. Mom
..> ..ot; src="http://x.myspace.com/images/spacer.gif" width=30 border=0> SOMETHING I WROTE FOR MY MOTHER R.I.P. SCREAMS I WANT TO BE IN YOUR MIND, BODY & SOUL..AND IN YOUR HEART AND LOVE YOU MORE THAN A DREAM COULD EVER BE IN THE DEEPEST SLEEP OF ANYONES NIGHT WITH MY FACE PRESSED UP AGAINST A GLASS WINDOW WANTING THAT OLD LIFE BACK SO BAD BUT ITS SO FAR OUT OF REACH DEEPER THAN ANY OCEAN BLUE LEAVING ME LOST LIKE A FLOWER WITHOUT RAIN....LIKE A THUNDERSTORM WITHOUT LIGHTNING...I WANNA LIVE AND NOT JUST EXSIST AND IT IS ALL MORE THAN A DREAM TO ME ...CAN I GO ON WITHOUT MY SCREAMS?AND BE HAPPY? WITHOUT YOU? OR WILL MY LIFE REMAIN THE CIRCUS LIFE THAT IT IS IN THIS HELL THAT I MADE FOR MYSELF BUT WHEN YOU DIED THE FIRE CAME ALIVE AND AND BECAME THIS ROARING BLAZE THAT IS SO INSANE HAVE YA EVER FORGOT WHO WHO U ARE?AND I MEAN TO THE POINT WHERE YOU GET DIZZY AT TIMES AND SCARED LIKE SOMEONE HAS A GUN TO YOUR HEAD? I HAVE ....ANXIETY IS WHAT

My Lost Breath!!
Waiting for you to arrive, I settle in gracefully. Undressing myself slowly as I pave a path to your santuary. Fingertips brushing my lightly chilled skin as I part clothing. Dropping little evidence here and there. Trying to captivate your thoughts as you enter your castle. From a very long day, you feel the need to relax, but you see something hanging on the doorknob as you stroll up the walk. You get closer and the foreign object becomes clear. A black stocking hangs just barely. You part your lips in a sweet grin, and your imagination starts to play. Feeling your excitement brush the front of your blue jeans. You open the front door to only find a t-shirt lying on the floor. In the not so far distant, you see a black lacy bra. Peeked enticement you follow the path to suduction. Arriving to the bedroom door, your shakey hand turns the doorknob, the door opens. Your jaw drops slightly as I lay barely covered on your bed. Uncontrolable light moans excape me as I ready myself

Our Creativity!!!
Naked, walking up behind me, I feel you reach around me with one arm to pull me closer. Then the other hand comes up my back slowly and gently. As your hand reaches the base of the back of my neck, you firmly pull my hair towards you. You start kissing my neck slowly as your breathing gets more and more rapid. I feel your hard urgency to be inside my now dripping hot sex. Turning around to face you, I see the need of entrance on your handsome face. My eyes slowly wonder down your body, stopping at the glistening moist tip of your cock. Taking my finger I wipe the moist tip. Bringing my finger to my lips, I swipe my tongue to taste what you have to offer. Savoring the image of what it will bring. Needing to know how your hard cock fits into my now watering mouth, I get down on my knees. Admiring your cock for just a brief moment. Placing my hands behind my back, I gather your hard, throbbing cock in my mouth with such ease. Swirling my tongue around the tip as I take you deeply as I

Imaginary Friends
http://search.barnesandnoble.com/Imaginary-Friends/Yolanda-Jackson/e/9781608620173/ Chapter One Everyone had or has imaginary friends; what do yours tell you to do? Well, I’ll tell you about my friends. Back in the 1980's, I was living the worthless life of an abused child, one that society doesn’t care about. I was what they called poor white trash; my father was nowhere around and my mother was a whore and drug addict. Every night she would bring different men into the house, hoping to score enough money for a hit, and most of the time she would sell me to them. I was raped, beaten and molested, but she didn’t care; my innocence was making her rich. Instead of the men asking for her, they’d asked for me. Yes, I tried to fight back, but the men were too strong for me. I called out for my mother, but she ignored my pleas; she sat in the room and smoked her cocaine as the men had their way with me. She never came to check on me; she didn’t know if I

Need Friends
Hi everyone, I am a new author on the block and I need friends and supporters.fans are great too.I love making new friends with like intrest and also different too. I have made friends everywhere and Fubar is no different,I will love to make friends,share blogs,stories etc.and who knows one day I might be a big time Author...:)

Leave Me Alone
Get away from me, you make me mad, stay away from me, you make me sad. The words you say are nothing but delight but you can't understand my dispair and spite. These words of happiness these words of joy, the only time I use words are only to destroy. The amount of anger that only I consume, will stay with me my whole life and will be carved in my tomb. I only live for the reason to die, I only feel pain just so I cry.

Religion
The story on life, Can be described in many ways. Sometimes in the bible, Sometimes in a praise. The Islam Quran, The Hebrew torah. No matter what you read, There's still death's aurora. The Buddha of the buddhists. The priest of a church. They all worship something, But hate still must lurch. Can't you understand, That no matter how much you pray. Bad stuff will always happen, And we'll still be in dismay. You people pray for forgiveness, You pray for world peace. Well who the fuck are your praying to, The death rate won't stop to increase. Tell me why you have religion, And still we are at war. Pray all you want, But still your target will ignore. Religion is something to believe, But there is no proof of it being true. Well, I hopes it just me, But aren't your answers a little overdue? Believe what you want, For this is just what I think. Fuck the whole damn world of hatred, And now this holy water I must drink.

Relapse Is Run
I looked up at the sky Dogs ran on the stars Oh the colors I saw Don't remember what they are Retake the pills Uppers in my brain Give me some more So I can be insane Abduct the law Laws are so wrong Let us do drugs Tell them we're strong Heavy users Eat their addiction Take some more Immunize this restriction My drugs never go away Even though I do a lot I think not a day goes by My lungs breath in pot Salvage salvation Open the south Hold the joint Insert it in your mouth Gather all the seeds Harvest your own plants Relapse is so fun I'm so high as I chant Green and purple Higher than the sky Trees of laughter Now begin to cry Open the bushes Why won't this make sense I think I hear the cops Maybe I'll jump this fence Nocturnal eyes Open really wide Towards the day light Leave this side I'm smoking a joint Every word I write I need some cocaine Now or I'll cry tonight Get some cocaine I need some cocaine Acid is fine Meth gives me pain Holy shit I've never felt this good Get high wit

Quick Murder
Oh no, Look what you did to my knife! You got blood all over it, my wife. Please feel free to understand your death, While I clean you up from your breath. All those crying pictures hanging from the wall, Anguish that reminds me how you fall. Sweet little child, for your the next in line, Come here I won't hurt you, this gun isn't mine. Oops, I accidently pulled the trigger, boy. I'm so sorry, I hurt you with my toy. Here let me help you and mommy in this ditch, Bye-bye to both of you, life is such a bitch..

Questionz
Have you ever tried to bleed? Have you ever tried to die? No? Are you ever thinking of why? What's the point of living? What's the point of death? Why? Maybe it's just so we have a last breath. It's easy to ask some questions, And ride your problems like a horse. But if you want some answers, You might need to use some force.

Put Tha Gun Down Kyle
You've really done it now Putting those pills down your throat And that gun in your pocket Hidden deep in your coat Did you think she was cheating Or did you jump to conclusions It's too late, you already fired An attempt to escape this confusion Look at you, tough guy With that empty bottle of booze You have two options when the lights come Now it's time to choose Put the gun down Kyle Your just digging a hole Fuck all that bull shit Your not one bit in control You've taken it upon yourself To shoot your own wife So come with us Kyle We don't want to end your life Don't try anything stupid We can see you're feeling down Try to think for a moment Do you want to die with a frown Put the gun down Kyle Before we feel afraid Becuase you know what will happen then We'll shoot you and get paid Kyle, don't even think about it I can see it in your eyes You standing there ready to go When that gun starts to rise Ok, Kyle It looks like you've made your decision No point in calming you down now T

Paradoxical Sleep
I can't stop crying, I've wasted my life. So much pain in my mind, Hurts like a knife. I've tried so hard, But life's not what it seems. The only way I could be happy, Is in my escape dreams... Why does it have to be this way? In dreams it always ends ok... Where's my line? Where's my number? For I'm not bothered, When I'm in slumber. I saw the light, Then closed the door. Now it's too late, My life I ignore. I can not feel pain, When I'm asleep. I can not drop blood, When dreams will creep. Why does it have to be this way? You'll see, it will end ok... Or maybe my life is like reality, No truth in it at all. Maybe this is why after all I've been through, I refused to fall. No, I did fall, Though I stood right back to my feet. No broken bones, Just destroyed dreams burned in hopeless heat. Visions of dreams, No hope to be true. Hidden behind crooked pictures, That will never look new. Once you grow up, Your past is a scar. And once you grow up, You realize who you are... Why

Oh Boy Wat Fun To Do
Make people cry, Make people hurt. Oh, what fun, To treat them like dirt. Make people angry, Make people mad. Oh, what fun to do, To make people sad. Oh boy! Oh Boy! What fun to do! Don't feel bad, If it's not you! Screw all the innocent, Don't wait till they're dead. Let them feel the pain, You can feel good instead. Ruin their lives, Ruin their soul. You can have the power, You can be in control. The sweetness of pain! What fun to see them suffer. It doesn't matter if your weak, It doesn't matter if your tougher.

Nothing But Hate
Black is all I see, Including you and me. I've heard the devil's cry, I've heard it in the blink of an eye. My hatred keeps me alive, Death helps me survive. Love is all I dream, My darkness keeps me keen. All I want is love, But I wasn't given to me from above. Now it's to late, I only consume hate.

No More Love For Me
I have loved many people, I have loved very easy. But the one I loved the most, Went and died in front of me. She took her life away, She also took my tears. I have never loved since then, Nor will I for years. Don't try to love me, I won't ever love you. I don't care about anything, Even if I wanted to. You won't ever make me love, So don't expect a thing. The feeling of love can feel good at times, And other times it stings. Stop annoying me with these emotions, That I will never feel. You might think love is everything, But to me it isn't real. This all might be disturbing, This all might be sad. Don't ever think that not feeling emotions, Can't be that bad. I would do anything, Just to not feel depressed. Why must I be under so much pressure, Why must I be stressed. Even though I seem innocent, I am the culprit and the victum. I have committed the crime of life, Though I can't find the dictum. Love is a talent, That every one can do. Hate is the sum of love, That's all I can constr

Love Of Mine
Oh, lover of mine, Tell me where have you gone? I just turned around, And you were nowhere to dawn. I remember the days, Where we used to play, The blue sky would shine, And being sad was ok. I don't understand, How you could ever replace. Those tears in your eyes, With a smile on your face. I wish I could do, The things that you did. Back in the days, When we were just little kids. We would go to the park, We would feed all the ducks. But ever since then, Our lives were forever stuck. Oh, lover of mine, Tell me what do you see? When you look back through your life, And you don't see me. Oh, I loved you so much, But now I hate you so. Now I don't even care, The reason that made you go. I wish I could cry, oh, how I wish I could. I would cry all the time, Oh, yes I would. Now you want to come back, And jump back in my world. I don't want you back, All those wasted moments won't unfurl. Just leave me alone, Please lover of mine, Leave my rotted life, So I could just resign.

Looze My Soul
I feel upon me, The shadow of death. It shatters my life, It takes away my breath. I know it's too late, I know it is done. I cannot turn back now, I cannot start to run. I would smile, But I'm too weak. I share with you, What I speak. Blood falls to the ground, I no longer feel the pain. What has gone through my head? I am turning insane. There must be something wrong, Now look what I've done. I've ended my life, I will no longer have fun. The shadow of death came upon me, So now I must go. I fear nothing but the darkness, As I loose my soul.

Isolectic
Some people love, And they know it's real. But me and some others, Don't remember how it feels. See, I'm isolectic, A very rare and unheard of disease. That when ever I see you smile, To me it is a tease. See, my neurons in my brain, They don't work at all. I lack of serotonin, Which means I have no emotions to fall. I can't feel happy, I can't feel shy. I can't feel sad, I can't even cry. Though, I wish I could cry, It would be such a relief. I would sell my life to the good, Just for me to be in grief. You might think it would be great, To not know how to love. All I can do is hate, That's all I receive from above. I can't feel emotions, Because my receptors died. Man, I wish this was all a dream, And I could wake up from this lie. But this is real, And it could never change. I need to face reality, I will always derange.

In Lezz Than 1 Sec
I believe my day has come, But still I wish it wasn't so. I had so much things to live, But now I need to go. The moment the trigger pulled back, The moment that was filled with fear. The bullet blasted threw the air, I knew that death was near. In between that moment of truth, I've realized what I've done. This guy was really serious, There was a bullet in the gun. I thought of my wife and kids, I thought of my smile and frown, Then in less than a second, I fall dead to the ground.

Im Sorry
Think of the lives that only can sway, I held their lives in my hand and threw them away. I'm sorry I did it, their blood in my hand, But I couldn't help it, I just couldn't stand. If only I awoke to stop myself think, Their lives would be theirs and just me to thank. Now they are dead, it couldn't be changed, Now just for them their funeral arranged. Why me, why me, why did I have to kill? I went to sleep and woke up just to find I was ill. I'm sorry I did it, I'll repay them all back, This knife in my hand and life I will slack. The next time I sleep, I will not awake, The time I will die is the next breath I take.

I'm Curious
I hate to say it, now I'm curious as to why I'm still here not only to key this but to do other things? See, I'm supposed to be dead. Some people say Jesus is with him and others the devil is with him. My sister says I have a Guardian Angel. I'm curious as to why I'm still here. To me it does not matter. I'm alive, I'm alive. I'm dead, I'm dead. Intresting, since I do not have anyone special but only material things. Glad to hear that the day went well for Cheryl. Cheryl is a friend. Glory to God Norio

Counting Down To
You believe and I don't. You have faith in yourself or something I do not. All I'm doing is waiting for OR 13. Counting down to the last one to cross the threshold for that OR to exist and the final one to corss for it to cease. No one or thing knocked me down to cease. Nothing out here for any reason any can come up with for me to say, your right. That is my purpose and the reason for me to be here. Many things are said by The Master The Christ but one of the last thing that is said in The Gospel is very odd. He who has a coat must now sell it and buy a sword. That is referenced to Old Testament, they shall beat their sword into plow share. Gospel, if he presses you for your tunic, give him your coat as well. The Lord, left nothing but contradictions. Why is it that it that it is apparent to me but you bow down to who ever comes along with their very slick story to satisfy your need for the moment? Look at yourself in that mirror for the long haul. Glory to God Norio

Giving
So much for me giving. It's about time others gave. Cooper Hospaital for 6 days and their excuse about this surgery is that they did not trust the accuracy of the blood work by Lab Corp. I even gave them a Cardiac Cath knocked out. Time for others to shell out to me. Like all the personal and private information of the strange man and woman from May 13, 2009. Ask Joe, my Barber, it was in hes shop, he's been cutting my hair off and on since I was a kid in Mantua, NJ. Two Others before him. He still has the booster seat I used. Hey, I gave and Doctor Viswanath, you said you or we can do no more. That's what you said. I mentioned the minimum invasive and you suggested someone. You said we can't do no more or any more. Your the one that took offense at the truth of that so called crazy letter which I have a copy. Norio

Not Knowing It Would Appear
Just reading my often angry Blogs here and not knowing, it would appear that this guy is crazy. The appearance maybe that, but you never knew me. All sorts of people and agencies at both state and federal levels are involved regarding me and my former wife. Does any of this ever end for me. Yes, upon my death it all comes to an end. I have been dead since January 14, 2009 and yet I am here to key this and do my daily things At the moment death is not a fear for me as it has not. My greatest fear is that I may make decision now or soon with far reaching consequences. The future is not given to me but at times I do see a little of it. Often it is not clear to me what I did look at but looking backward it makes all the sense. Also, I took it the right way. Often I am angry and sad. At other times I at peace with myself and the Universe. People not fully understanding where I have been and am at right now will never get their judgement right. It will always be off. Blessed are those who k

Whistle
I had an appointment this morning and actually kept it. Seems some of the politicians are getting threat and so forth and yet there are two squad cars behind me. I am viewd more as a threat while there are people that are actually are a threat. Easy to detect them when their tagging as it is if they were actually headed to some place. Is it that easy? My surgery I am reconsidering due to the position that is given me upom my death. I know what happens and I also know how not to complete it. At that point I am free and can behave as I choose. Nothing is there to stop me from doing anything and all I have to do is allow the natural process of life to take place. Such archic concepts as vedetta is in my realm to exercise. Ask the Roman Catholic church about the Exorcist and hes inability to interfere. God wins what ever is my choice. A choice I never had because I don't dwell in a dream land but the concrete reality called life and death. In life and death there are no choices to make on

What Do You See
She says to me, sometime you see into the future and she asked me what do you see? I told her the truth at that time. This is over a new position last year and I said I see something but I am not quite sure what to make of it. At that time I did not, except she'll have this position but the rest at that time was very confusing and I went back to driving. Just like this afternoon. I got the notion, sunny boy, look outside and I did so and the fiasco. I thought for a moment are they for real or what? Time to deduct something and I did. It will be taken care of the week of the 28th which starts tomorrow. Either you got it or you don't. You can't take unless you give. Since you and others gave nothing all I'm doing is taking it off the table, not to be bargained for it ever again. Right now you have less than a handful left. Keep at it, the hand and the rest will be gone too. Amen Glory always to God Norio

Mary Isgreat
Marijuana has come a long way in the past 8000 years. It’s gone from illegal if you didn’t grow the plant to illegal even if you possess a single seed. Marijuana isn’t even the plants real name. Marijuana is the name that the government gave the plant to make it sound like it had Mexican decent. The real name of the plant is Cannabis. In this paper I will talk about standards for growing hydroponics, person conflicts, and the government’s role in the cannabis culture. I’ll try to put this large amount of information in the appropriate order and context. Originally there where two types of cannabis plants in the world and depending on where a person lived on this planet determines what type of plant a person had access to. The first type is the type native to North America and still grows indigenes in this nation. The name of this cannabis plant is called Cannabis Sativa. Sativa plants grow very well outdoors and are generally large plants or trees, s

Somethings Are Very Costly
In life somethings are very costly like a failure or a mistake by someone not knowing the protocol of game. This mistake this afternoon cost you an appointment with my Cardiologist. Next move is yours. Mistake ends game for that one. Norio

Impression Was To
My impression was to leave out the fornt but ny lock is kind of hard to install from the outside. My sis will tell you that dead bolt cannot be opened even with the key but I worked on it. You'll need a pass key right now. I went against what I felt and a stuffed animal was on the floor. I retaced my steps as I went out and no, I had the Jac Shirt on but unbottened until the kitchen. I did the usual since that dog was never knocked down by me. I'm sorry Mr. Doggie but I have to sit you aside for awhile. For now that's where it stands. Tomorrow never comes and look more into it. Strange day this has been and it is not finished. Not a drop of truth as of yet. Candle no longer will illuminate me. Too many mistakes by others at this point and Cheryl is absolutely right. I trust no one. I was in Cooper Hospaital for six days and five nights but Insurance has me down as three days? I thought about this and I would think it was for observation, otherwise, they have to do something like sur

Forbid They Get This Wrong So Let Me Help
You know I started thinking no matter what we all end up dead. God forbid they get this wrong so let me help them get this right. I started to die on January 14, 2009. I had 50/50 of making it a year on February 20, 2009. I heard physician after another tell me, if you don't have this surgery your dead, meaning me. 50/50 of making it 5 years with med and no smokes and yet I'm smoking and taking a little bit of a beta blocker. December 4, 2009 a physician tells me you'll be back in a day or two. What's wrong with me? Die will you? Just keel on over dead will you? What's wrong with me? Get with the program will I and just drop. God forbid I live just as long or longer as predicted with surgery but I never have it due to a problem. The problem is God. I know it's not me. God is the problem. God is in charge. Don't blame me but blame God. Amen Should be dead Norio

Almost A Defeatest Attitude
It would appear as though my decision of no to surgery is almost a defeatest attitude. It is the only logical decision to be reached. Nothing is gained by me what ever is done or not. I took the safe attitude. I may go on another day or month and a day. Who knows a year and a day. Perhaps as long as the surgeon and all said. Ten years or longer? After reaching that decision and actually carried it out, things like to cancell and looking at it now I feel a sense of great Peace as if God is with me. Glory to God Norio

The Sound Of....
**~~The Sound Of**~~ The sound of ocean and wind makes me to think what's on my mind,The sound of the wind make me feel touch...The sound of ocean makes me feels like I'm touching dolophins.The sound of god makes me that i'm talking to lord.The sound of rain i'm soaking wet...

Why Wont I And What Is Keeping Me Back
Someone here today helping me and she says to me why don't you go to church to which I replied for what? She sadi for friends. Exactly, why wont I and what is keeping me back? I do not know? I'm at loss to say anything beyond that. Something isn't right and I cannot place a finger on it as of yet. I may never be able to. Resignation is to the self and to God. Only God knows everything, while I know very little of myself and what is truly out here. For what ever the reason I walked away from The Order and the Roman Catholic church. What ever is this Brotherhood I am trying to pay attention as not to get doped by them. Whack boy says, there are temptations every where. I see it a little different. One temptation alone exist for me. As long as I remain alert to this I may do well. I know that I will fail this one temptation, but I will fight. What ever is compelling me is forcing me to an almost a solitary life. I'll see very soon for the future is coming up for us all. Holy Thusday e

In The Belly Of
The Christ was dead in the belly of the Earth for three days and three nigths. I believe That The Christ was dead and raised Himself from deaths grip and rose out of that grave. The Christ walked amongst us. I believe that The Christ is The Son of God and to Him alone do I bow. I do not wear the faith on my sleeve or chest as a badge. It is personal between Him and me. Glory to God and The Son The Christ Norio

Song I Wrote 3 Yrs Ago
Here is a song I have written on Jan. 4, 2007 Losing Control Is it me or my false truths killing me off I swear I hear voices calling out to me Claiming my every move Grasping at my ever so darkening soul A fear begins to engulf my confidence CHORUS: Am I losing control of my reality Decapitating my less eerie disquise Losing control of myself Causing the evil in me to unbind Can't think of all the control I had Feeling my insanity claiming me I can't reclaim the life I once had The once beautiful rose I have is now black CHORUS: Losing control of my concience, even worst than before. I'm afraid that I'm completely losing control I can't take it anymore This loss of control is driving me insane. The darkness has come stronger than before Where is all this going to end up taking me? Why does this hell have to burn? Wanting this madness to end Fucking me over and ruining me CHORUS: I'm really losing control of myself This all hurts too much inside Causing me to cry tears of my own blood

Mass Of Wicked Destruction
Back like insane its that wicked motherfucker kris. What you thought you could fuck with this. Thought you was the hardest. But you ain't. So back off before you get your shit fucked wit. I'm to hard like wicked. Ain't no way you could do this how i do it. Nor live how i spit it. I'm not whats in here. I'm the shit. Besta recognize who the fuck you dealing with. Hard like the perfection this spit this. Despite what you can't think how i write. & i'm just so out of sight. Crazy with that hard gutter flow. No easy believe me. Metaphor don't worry about how i deliver. With ya body in the river. Killing off with instinct. I'm so distinct to have ya off at the precint. With much intent heaven's sent from what i repent. I don't care what you think of me rhyming. Nothing like you & me in common. I'm bombing fall down. Way underground spitting with that wicked shit. Who it be mr. innovative & creativity. Nobody you know real or wicked as me. Hot shit to rock. I rap beat you way out of your map

Temp
Often the damadge caused by Insulin is temporary and sometimes permanent. It is criminal to hide it in a surgery that was not needed. I was dead on 1/14/09 and only to be alive and doing much better not because of any surgery or medicine but because I lisetened to that quiet voice of God within rather than the howling madness of medicnine and its ability to hide any crime they wish by sticking togeather. Hold the ranks as God dismantels your sacred oath. Glory to God Norio

Check The 20
I stopped at Glassboro, Sears Hardware for some hook and loop 5", 8 hole sanding disks or paper. New crew or maybe people standing in for others. Here comes one and another but by the time I'm walking out there are three law enforcement. Did you check the $20.00 FRN to be sure it is legit? It is rather new. I know I'm such a bad guy driving that type of car and it is profiling and it is against the law. I did laugh at the whole fiasco. I have physicians and all sorts of people committing fraud, lies, and breaking the laws and they're wasting time and money because of someones inability to tell a bad guy from a good guy. Bad guy isn't so polite or looking for a hook and loop which they know nothing of. What does Sears Hardware have that a bad guy will want so bad. Lord have mercy. You know Vineland in New Jersey hasn't a clue about Safe Job or Seniority. Easy to save the Sate of NJ a lot of money. Dump those in charge who know not what I just said and that's about all of them. Politi

Slim
I did a lot of things today. I went over to see D and looked at her tractor. I moved two bicycles by carrying one in each arm. Yeah, she saw how it did me in. I like it, because the chance of me going for any length of time is very slim. I gave up and I never quit. I refuse to quit since secret secret. I'd rather meet my friends where we're supposed to than to yield to idiots who has no right, since they never perticipated. You win and I get out. Congratulations! Norio

Dose
Why am I going through all this? Very simple. Someone want to give a dose of truth instead of lies. Like a dose salt, it can be good or painful but if the salt has lost it's flavor, it is what? Think about the miners in West Virginia? Did you pray for them? I will very soon seek God to do so. Strange that I would seek God? I got a handle on The Bible. I have nothing to gain or loose from The Bible. If anything I said here and elsewhere is incorrect, please, prove me wrong with your Bible. You don't need a degree in Theology or Biblical Studies but The Laws of God has to be written on your Heart. What are The Laws of God? Ten Commandments are The Laws of God. Lies belong to what? Who lied first? Time keeps slipping into the future that is coming true to what I saw in the very first Trime. Second Trime as well. The third one has taken place and will finish very soon. Glory to God Norio

C'mon
I was told that my little house way back was a church of a sort and D tells me it was built by her father for her uncle. C calls me up to tell me what took place upon her return, like her TV, I have a logical explanation. The entire area is full of energy and it seems a cross hair is on my house. Take this cross hair out far enough it becomes a cross. This cross hair is exactly centered on my house. C'mon, Norio, do your thing. It's time to take your place isn't it Norio. Your waking up. You know who is the Dark Man and the Man of Sin along with who is The Grand Master. Intresting turn of event's. Energy to use to conquer my own self and have The Physician Heal Thyself. Great change as it is coming here is always looked upon as evil. I held back. Secret Brotherhood. We are all here for what I do not know? Glory to God Norio

Dakka!!! (or, An Intro To This Blog).
For those that don't know, haven't googled, etc. This blog will be dedicated to the exploits of my Warhammer 40k Ork Amy. Epic battles, funny characters, etc. All will be told here. Enjoy! "We is gonna stomp da universe flat and kill anyfink that fights back. We're da Orks, and we was made ta fight and win." -Ghazgkull Thraka (Prophet of the WAAGH!!!).

Don Not Know Any Of
I do not know any of the members. All of the Core members know who is The Grand Master. All of the Inner members know all of the Core members except one. Members know at least two of the Inner members. As I remeber it. Movement out side coming closer to me. I will yield each and every time until the Trump Card is used. I may walk. If that's the case then a stone has more Heart than me. Ice has more warmth than me. Glory to God Norio

Anita Meets Haven
Taken From Danse Macrabe "Taste Haven," Auggie said. "If you don't like him, then I'm going to have to send home for some less dominant take-out."I looked up at the tail man in front of me. He looked down with that soft, laughing face, and I just didn't buy it. It was like the smile and sparkly eyes was his version of a cop face. A way to hide everything.He dropped gracefully to his knees. Which made him not that muchshorter than me. I added at least another inch to his height. He laughed, that joyous laugh that seemed so sincere. "You should see your face, so suspicious.I just thought that this way you have your choice of wrist or neck.With me standing, you can't reach my neck."It made sense, so why didn't I like it? No answer other than the one I'd had since I saw him. Being close to him reacted with that primitive part of the brain that keeps you alive if you don't argue with it.Touching him was dangerous in some way, but in what way? The trouble with the primitive brain is that

Haven "sizing" Up
"Haven. My name's Haven." I think he smiled, but it was hard to tell on the lionish face, from the angle Ihad. "Though Cookie Monster works just fine.""I said Cookie, not Monster.""You haven't seen me at my best, yet" he said, and smiled for sure.I did not understand the comment. Micah did. "He's implying he's big.""Oh," I said, then had to smile up at Micah. "He shouldn't brag until he's seen the competition."The lionman rolled his face to look at Micah. He wasn't looking at his face. Micah said, "You aren'tseeing me at my best either."Even through the lion's face I could see the arrogance as he looked up at me, not at Micah. "Trust me,I'll measure up. Auggie was shopping for size, not just talent."

One Extreme To
All fronts are silent. It has gone from one extreme to another. I know now that there are awful lot of people completely out of control. By going to these extreme you show me your hands. I should be dead according to 2/20/09. Had you left it alone with me going back to my apartment next day and come back for surgery we'd be looking back. This has gone from one isanity to another. Who do I trust now regarding this? No one at all! I tend to be honest truthful but you all are nothing but a lie. Not one of you are trust worthy. Look in the mirror will you? Be proud. Norio

Too Hot Too Cold
It is either too hot or too cold. Alive or dead. There is going to be but not. What am I crying about? See, if there was medication given to me to clear the blockage and a stint placed in me while I was knocked out, then there is no surgery. I don't see a whole lot prosecution going on and everyone is silent about this, then that's the case. Surgery was to prevent a death due to a Heart attack and the AAA is taken care of by a stint durning a Cath while I'm knocked out. Can't have the quality of life getting better because of it due to the damged Heart muscles, so it stays the same. The surgery would of been done but it never was. Why is that? Read above. See ya

Conversation
I try to pay attention to what is being said by someone and if I do not fully understand, I ask for more details. Just because I want to understand fully what is being said, some people just take a bite here and there and sware they got the whole story. Wrong is what I say. All I have to do is listen to what another repeats back to me when the conversation involves me. Example is when I ask my sister what are you doing because of sounds I am hearing on the phone and she tells me she has to raise the volume up on her phone which is in her pocket. I ask where are you because you sound like your in a kennel. She says outside and I say the dog is your neighbors far away giving the effect like a kennel. I'm a part of a conversation and I want to fully understand instead of just guessing. Some go that distance and others fail to do so due to life or their desire is different than mine. My desire is the truth. I will not blindly place my faith or belief because of an outside force tells me

My Mother
Today is no different than any other Monday. My mother will tell you, I love my son, but he is nothing but trouble. He was born exactly as I was told. Demons and ghosts separated company. Devil could not be found. The Masters instructs him but he hunts them as prey. I could never tell a lie without him knowing or with hold anything before he would force me to tell him. Hes God is not the god I follow. Hes God demands no excuse but each and every time he has got it right. I love my son, but no one like him, I worry how he'll make out? I wonder how I'll make out? Jerome and Opthillio, how am I making out? Expectation met or am I a failure? Does it matter? Hell and Damnation doesn't follow me does it? I wonder how I'll make out? Glory to God Norio

No, Not These Morons
I gave a coat of primer yesterday and it dries in about 30 minutes to an hour. So this morning I'm doing laundry in the basement. I thought it's time to check these paint cans. They're all white meaning there is a tint that was added. Often there is a tag on top with what was used and the ratios. No, not these morons. I had to cut and pry the lid off of one and thank God there is paint. I stirred it good and placed some of that paint on a shim. I'll wait until it dries and take it to Home Depot since its their paint and try to match it. I am hesitant to use a Latex finish and I'm thinking of a oil based counter to it. I'll see what the young lady or a guy tells me. Never know, they might know what they're talking about? My mother would say that's my son doing hes nonsense messing with their head but in reality I'm curious and if there is no curiosity in you, hang your hat and take off your shoes. Sit and watch TV until that time. I did notice something. It was 73 degreese in here lat

Hand Full
If my mother was alive she'd tell you that I was a hand full as I grew up and also tell you that you want my son by you. I have never seen any one like him. Letter can cut both ways. A letter by Doctor Rosenbloom to remove any guilt can be used to place all the guilt on him. Here is why. DPD and having it makes it difficult to pin anything down. To wait is nonsense but to do it as quick as possible is the way. I was in Cooper for 6 days and 5 nights for my Heart and had a surgery planned on that Wednesday but cancelled because Doctor Rosenbloom along with Cooper Hospitla, Heart House, and the Cardiologist that was caring for me said we don't trust the accuracy of the blood work that was done by Lab Corps and we, meaning Cooper, are doing our own blood test. One specific test that takes a while or up to 2 weks to get the result. It is a timed test. Yes, there was a scheduled Heart By-Pass which it seems I cancelled. Due to DPD I may know what is going on but no control as to the out co

Trust
telemitsu trust no one. Even the ranks of The Master's has been penetrated. I want you there and you will know no friend or enemy. My mistake will not rule. The things as we once did no longer applies. Uncharted. Unknown. Desolate. The key is what? Consecrated and Sacred Hands Norio

Rob Zombies Halloween 2
Well first off I have to establish that I prefer the John Carpenters originals. But as much as I don't like how far away Rob took the iconic franchise, I must say that there were elements of the film I have to salute. No element was left out. The mental and emotional suffering. A Sherrif trying to do right for two young womem. The depth of emotion when The Sherrif finds Annie. There is a soft sort of tragic element added to this story of hell.

Advice Please!
I'm gaining weight back and I've lost alot of my drive to workout. I've been running myself ragged taking acre of things and still comming up short. I'm so worried I might plateu or worse just gain it all back. Any advice?

A Lonely Girl
She sits there, torn between head and heart. She looks in the mirror, hoping that something will come to her. Eyes glistening with tears, not sure what to think. Her head and heart, saying two different things. Her head telling her that she is alone, not worthy, should leave so she isn't a burden, just give up on everything cause everything is just giving up on her, her head tells her she is stupid, thinks to much, that she isn't capable of love, that she can't be happy. Her heart tells her that things will be ok, that she is not alone, that she is worthy, that she isn't a burden, and that things will work out, that she can be happy, and is happy, that she is in love, and happy with her love. Tears start to fall, torn between what to think and what to do, knowing what she wants, but wondering if he still wants her. Wondering if everything will work out like she wants it to, hoping, praying, that everything will turn out right, for the lonely girl wh

Hazel & Green Eyes
Hazel eyes show me, the window to his soul. As I look into the depths of them, Swirling deep within, many different emotions, are all coming together. These hazel eyes, that are reflecting what I know to be, in my own eyes. Looking into bright hazel eyes, emotions become clearer, becoming more known. Hazel eyes that smile at me, with affection, pride, adoration, and most strongly love. Hazel eyes that lock with green eyes, speaking louder, then any word that can be spoken. Hazel eyes are the mirror image, of the green eyes, that are being looked into. Hazel eyes show the promising future, of what both lovers know will come. Hazel and green eyes are, mirrors of love for him and her. This hazel eyed man, and this green eyed girl, never needing words, their eyes are the answer to every question. Eyes locked together, the world lost to them, other then their own world, for just them to know. As green eyes, stare deep into hazel eyes, she sees a family, this family consis

Sundered
Foundations solidified by a blistering time, sand driven deep by winds of tempest speed make not a crumbling shift, but a mass unmoved by gods nor the very time to which birth rites are doled. Not third but first the stars that shine do compete for the crown deserved by whom is seated, not so arrogantly, but humbly upon a throne shaped from generosity; a monarchy only befitting the traits of virtuous souls seated in pairs. But to what is unmoved may be changed, not by time, but by truth. A truth challenged where generosity thrived shakes ground upon those who are seated, moving violently and mercilessly, sundering that which bore witness to eternity first hand. Forever, such is changed but irreversible and cursed, incapable of regressing to safer times, prohibited from progressing past, trapped and broken. Now two, breaking the harmony which permitted its existence, smaller and meeker facing the pestilence of time, will not erode, but will outlast the sanity of men, stan

Nice Guys Finish Last
A best impression is what we tryWhen meeting a potential loveWe hold the door and pay for mealsHoping romance is what you think of We show the things your heart desiresIt may not seem like we are realWe try our best to prove it's trueTo show that love is what we feel There are men who dont displayThe kinds of things I mentionTheir only goal is sex and powerNot to give their heart's affection Because of those abusive thingsGuys like us dont get a chanceWe sit and watch from a distanceWhile others finally get their chance Guys like me are true and pureWe know that hearts can bleedWe do our best to just be thereAnd listen to what you need I write this thing to prove a pointWhether future, present or PastIt seems that in the very endNice Guys always finish last But I believe that there is hopeThat I again will one day loveA woman who will give the chanceTo give her what she dreams of I close this poem with good thoughtsI smile and wait for your replyI hope it's good what you see in

Stuff
So what to say? Firstly, Hiya fellow Fu's, not sure what I'm doing here, love lookin at the ladies, just a perv at heart. I don't have any fubucks for bling, although I'd love to bling yawl to death. Still poking around and learning how this werks. As for me, i'm a property manager in the ghetto, I carry illegal Mace and a gun. And yes i know how to use them. I'm also enrolled as a full time student to become a Drug and Alcohol abuse counselor, ironic i should be here eh? (: Anyway, just wanted to say hi to everyone and thanks for all the drinks and rates, makes me feel good, all warm and fuzzy like a navel. So friend me if ya like or not, i'm very approachable and friendly. Have a fu day all.

Airport Trilogy
Your plane finally arrives and I stand at the end of the jetway, waiting for you with butterflies in my stomach. I watch as the passengers all leave the plane and I wonder where you are, when I see you coming up at the rear of the crowd. My heart rate increases as you get closer and my jaw drops when I finally get a good look at you. I can't help but stare at your barely there top with your very short skirt. The tops of your black, thigh-high stockings barely covered by the hem of your skirt reveals, barely, the straps of your garter belt. For a moment, I stand rooted to the spot and speechless as my eyes roam over your beautiful body. Then, you leap into my arms, kissing me deeply, and I try to raise my arms to hold you close but I'm stopped as my hand brushes across you and I realize that you aren't wearing panties beneath your skirt. The desire that washes over me makes me forget where I am and who is around us as I lift your shirt and lower my lips to your lovely breast. With no re

Happy Birthday
You come home to what appears to be an empty house and wonder if I've forgotten your birthday. On the fridge is a folded note with your name on it in my handwriting. You open it and read, a smile growing on your face as you read what I've written to you. "No, I haven't forgotten your birthday, baby. Getting things together to make it just right for you. Today is all about you and your pleasure. Please go ahead and enjoy a nice hot shower and I'll be with you as soon as I can. I love you, baby. Never forget that.-James" With a grin, you head for the bathroom and slowly remove your clothes as you wonder what I have planned for the day for you. You turn the shower on and step in, letting the water just massage you as it runs over your soft skin and your thoughts turn to more and more naughty images of what kind of night it's going to be. Your hands run over your slippery body as you think and you start to moan as your fingers start to play gently with your nipples. Your eyes close as one

Home Cumming
You come home from a short trip and find a note from me on the door. "Baby, I'm sorry I can't be here to meet you at the door, but there are a few things I wanted to get done before you got home and, if you're reading this, I haven't quite finished up yet. I've called a babysitter and everything's all set, so if you'd like to take the kids over there, I can give you a proper welcome home while they stay the night. I love you and have missed you terribly." You smile at what my idea of a proper welcome home might be, and take the kids over, kissing them goodbye for the night from both of us. You get back home with a smile on your face, anticipating what I have planned, only to come in and find the house appearing to be empty. You close the door and look around, a little confused, before you notice the rose petals on the floor making a bit of a trail, but leading in an odd direction. You raise your eyebrows, thinking of how interesting the day might be as you follow the rose petals into t

The Classroom
Class starts out rather tame as I start to teach a rather touchy subject and I notice as students around the room start to blush as I talk about masturbation, though in a very detached and clinical way. Then I spot you in the front row in that very short plaid miniskirt and white short sleeve shirt, half unbuttoned so your black, lacy pushup bra is clearly visible. When you catch me looking, you part your sexy legs, your knee high socks and heels forming a V that makes me look at your smooth pussy and my words catch for a moment and you see me get hard instantly. Your two loose braids hanging down over your shoulders giving you a look of innocence while your smile says you're a very bad girl.After a few more minutes of teasing me like this, I have no choice but to sit behind my desk and have the class continue on their own with their text books. You can tell I'm trying hard to not look at you, but my eyes keep coming back so you decide to tease me further next time I look. I glance up

Wow!
Now that I have your Attention... I feel everyone has there own way are parenting. There are some of us that are over protective and others that may be a little too under protective. I am a mother of three wonderful children. I am under protective of my children...I will not take my kids to the doctor for a cough and running nose knowing that its allergy season. I do not buy my kids everything they want. I have my own form of work which pays the bills. Sometimes I travel a lot for my work. I DO spank my kids. I DO yell at my kids when they are being bad. I know I have faults as a mother and I am no where near perfect. Some people look at me as careless and that my children are suffering with me. They say that I lie all the time about what I do, they tell my kids that I am also a lair. That is all OK. I know that my kids are in love with life, they get excited about the little things like when it rains, seeing horses and cows while going on car rides, digging up worms in

Sometimes We Forget
You know, so often we complain and moan and groan about this screwed up country in which we live (believe me, I am to blame also). We don't take time to think of the positive things we do have (believe me, I am to blame also). A couple of days ago, I read an article in the Times that upset me pretty badly and made me think about the positive things we have, though not complete nor perfect, just better than some have it. Today (Friday) in the Times, I read the follow up to the article and just completely was astonished, bewildered and frankly angry. In the country, Malawi (don't ask, don't know where it is and never heard of it either), two men (a loving couple) were taken to court and sentenced to 14 years (the maximum) in prison with hard labor. Their crime, homosexuality. "The harsh sentence for unnatural acts and gross indecency had been expected after the same judge convicted the two men earlier this week under laws dating from the colonial era. The case has drawn inte

Howdy All And Something On My Mind
OK and here I go once again with a new accoutn after my last one was once again deleted. I have found most of my freinds form the last accounts and am hapy that I have. BUt now on to something that has been on my mind. Most of the friends I have on here are female. To be honest thats not the issue. The problem here is, most have NSFW pictures. Now granted I would be lying I would love to see them, but I am to much of a gentleman to ask to see them. A few of the ladies have already been nice enough to accept another question I have put towards which to this day I still say THANK YOU! But how do I go about askign fo rhte other thing or should I jsut leave it be and foget about it.

Wicked Nursery
I'm iller then ill. Light up the gas can. Leaks & it spill I kill annihilate. With what you can't get think straight. Fuck ya hate none shit relate. If ya can step up to the plate. How i'm going at this rate. To lose a dysfunction. With no assumption. What you think going by not showing. Its worse then what you not connecting. Disinfecting i'm wrecking neck checking. Watch as display how i do it. True to kicking how i get it. Like no hat you put on. Its not fitted. Leaded 'em off on the misled the bled shed. As you fall down to the ground. Dead no repeat what i said. With the whole bunch of shit i said. Leave 'em in a rid confused grid. Here i is here i am. That wicked fine g. You know yo ass can't see. & don't think you can try. Or if so then you can kiss ya ass Goodbye Here i go running off with the wicked shit. You can't get yourself with. Who the fuck do you think you fucking with. You best of be off on somewhere else. I kicks heavy with that rock ish metal. You can't settle. Who

Weekend Getaway
WEEKEND GETAWAYBy Steven PardoeFriday 5:00pm finally came. Kristi worked more overtime this past week than she had all of last year, helping the law firm she worked for prepare for a huge case. With a sigh that flipped the lock of blonde hair dangling in her face upward, she pushed back her chair and grabbed her briefcase from under the desk. Opening the case to put what was left of a fruit salad in Tupperware, she saw an envelope lying on top with her name scribbled across the front. The envelope itself caught her attention; vanilla in color with twin palm trees in the top left corner. She reached down to see what is as her eyebrows lifted up in curiosity. Sliding her French manicured fingernail along the sealed edge, she pulled out a plane ticket and a note. The note simply said, “Thanks for a job well done; everything is taken care of…… enjoy!” The plane ticket was to a five star resort in Jamaica, and it left in an hour!As the jet descended out of the bill

To All My Friends
Im deleting my profile and starting a new one..for some reason i cant rate anyone or their pics..and i cant change my statues or mood...for anyone that wants to remain friends you can find me with my email.... kittykarlf150@yahoocom...sorry everyone.....i will have my new profile finished by june first.... love to all, night owl

Mando'a (mandalorian Language)
This isn't complete, but it is a start. Verbs * a'den (AH-den) - to rage * atiniir (ah-teen-EER) - to endure, to stick with, to tough it out * baatir (BAH-teer) - to care, to worry about * beten - to sigh * brokar - to beat (heartbeat, drumbeat * cuyir - to be, to exist * dinuir (DEE-noo-eer) - to give * duraanir - to look down upon, to hold in contempt, to despise * duumir - to allow * ganar - to have * gaan - to want * hettir - to burn * hibirar - to learn * hukaatir (HOO-kaht-EER) - to protect, to cover, to shield * jehaatir - to lie * jorso'ran - shall bear (archaic imperative form) * jurir - to bear, to carry * jorhaa'ir - to speak * jurkadir - to mess with someone (lit: to brandish a saber) * kar'taylir - to know * k'uur(koor) - to hush, be quiet, to shut up * liser - to be able to, can * motir - to stand * narir (nah-REER) - to act (carry out), to do * nartir (nah-ree-TEER) - to place, to put * nau'ur (also: sometimes seen as naur) (now-00R) - to light up * nau

I Looked In You
Feel my pain,taste my tears.Take a glimps,of all the fear.You think you know,how things should be,but you dont know,what its like to be me.Look thru my eyesfeel the angerburn deep in your heartWait, dont leavethis is just the startcontinue to lookwhat is it nowall the darknessi made thru, somehowso dont ever assumethat you know who i amor think that beside meyou could even standyour words are poisonyour love untruei know this now,because i looked in you..............

Think !
There was a blind girl who hated herself because she was blind. She hated everyone, except her loving boyfriend. He was always there for her. She told her boyfriend, 'If I could only see, I will marry you.' One day, someone donated a pair of eyes to her. When the bandages came off, she was able to see everything, including her boyfriend. He asked her,'Now that you can see the world, will you marry me?' The girl looked at her boyfriend and saw that he was blind. The sight of his closed eyelids shocked her. She hadn't expected that. The thought of looking at them the rest of her life led her to refuse to marry him. Her boyfriend left in tears and days later wrote a note to her saying: 'Take good care of your eyes, my dear, for before they were yours, they were mine.' This is how the human brain often works when our status changes. Only a very few remember what life was like before, and who was always by their side in the most painful situations. Life Is a GiftToday before you say an

The Backs Of People
Don't piss down our bscks and call it rain. Don't exalt leaders because it's PC to do so. No "Leader" wants to take us anywhere. Who spends life getting into power for the good of the people? We need to stop fighting about left and right and just start fighting. Shit is crooked. The examples are ample. 2000 kisses are 2010 disses. Don't get me started.

English To Mando;a
Able to - liserAbsorb - sooranirAbusive - ge'hutuunAccurate - sairimAcross - dosAct - nari or narirAct suicidally - jareorAction - nariAdd - majycirAdopt - kir'manirAdoption (ceremony) - gai bal mandaAfar - be'chaajAggressive - verd'ycAide - ge'ver'alorAir - abiikAlcohol - galAlcoholic drink - tihaarAle - galAlleged - gehatycAll - anAlliance - tom or tsadAllied - tom'ycAllow (give permission) - duumirAllowed (given permission) - duumycAlly - tomadAlly (temporary) - narudarAlmost (before consonant) - geAlmost (before vowel) - getAlone - solusAlso - balycAlways - ratiinAmbition - copadAmbush - jehavey'irAmmunition - tebecAn (indefinate article) - eynAnd - balAngry - kadenAnything - mayenApologise - eparavur takisitApproach - ara'novorApproved - duumycArchivist - tay'haaiArea - veerayArm - irudArmor - beskar'gamArmored - beskarycArmy - akaan'adeArtillery - tracyaatAs, like (comparative) - as...asAs...As that - bid...ibacAsh - rangAshen-faced - jiriadAsking for it - jare'laAssembly - Tsad

How Many
Deb went looking for me on myspace and told me she came across 200 plus Norio Osborn. I said how many? That's impossible because I've only known two other people with the first name of Norio. One was motorcycle racer from Japan. Anothe a CEO of either Toyota or Sony. That being said, Comcast 411 is telling there is someone with my name living in Somerdale when I went looking for my Uncles. Ever check yourself out only to find multiples? In my case someone searchnig for me. Glory to God N

A Pome
We are the out casts of societyWe come from the rich an the poorWe're Christians pagans, anarchist, and otherFriends, brothers and sistersWe're known as juggalo'sThe FreakshowWe're honor boundWe live and die by the carnivalVery few understand usThe one's that do are FamFriends brothers and sistersWe're known as juggalo'sThe freak showGrease paint,Hachets,faygo,and homiesWe don't rape, kill or anything we sing aboutWe mug an do thing we ain't support toWe are survivorsFriends, bothers and sistersWe're known as juggalo'sThe Freakshowwe are every whereWe may not all agreeYet we stand together in the time of needWe will watch one another backsFor we are the freashowThe family of clowns and ninja'sSimply known as juggalo's

Poem
Let's Do a danceA Dance to deathDeath of romanceRomance and loveLove of anotherAnother never to holdTo hold never moreNevermore to danceThe dance of romanceIt's time to dance againTo find the right partnerFor the tango of loveWe start with a step n a twirlPain travels up you legAs a few feet are stepped onIt's nothing personalthat's just the way it goesAround an around we goTired of going through partnersBut sooner or latter I'll find the oneAn the dance will endWith a passionate kiss.

Gray Hair
So I always thought that I'd freak out the day I found gray hair. I went to cut my hair the other day, and noticed a gray hair sticking straight up. Because of where it was at and how it was growing, I pulled it... don't need stray hairs. But then I started looking really closely at my hair. I found about 10 long, shiny silver hairs in my head. Contrary to what I had thought about them, I smiled. I discovered I actually like them. I'm almost 31 years old, and I'm finally getting them. I figure after all I've been through in life, I've earned every single one of them. I'm not going to dye my hair to hide them, or pretend like I'm not getting older. Excited, I called my grandma and my mom to tell them about the signs of age. Then I sat back, stared at them a bit more, and smiled some more. Cover gray? NEVER! I'm as proud of those hairs as I am the stretch marks from my son.