LordTool's blog: "Love and shit.."

created on 01/14/2007 | http://fubar.com/love-and-shit/b44477

posted on 06/20/2009&nbs-07:00;@&nbs-07:00;02:06&nbs-07:00;pm

Beautiful
http://fubar.com/beautiful/b44477-1035066

"Beautiful"

Lately I've been hard to reach I've been too long on my own Everybody has a private world
Where they can be alone Are you calling me, are you trying to get through
Are you reaching out for me, I'm reaching out for you

I'm just so fuckin' depressed I just can seem to get out this slump
If I could just get over this hump
But I need something to pull me out this dump I took my bruises, took my lumps
Fell down and I got right back up But I need that spark to get psyched back up
In order for me to pick that mic back up I don't know how I pry away
And I ended up in this position I'm in I starting to feel distant again
So I decided just to pick this pen Up and tried to make an attempt to vent
But I just can't admit Or come to grips, with the fact that I may be done with rap
I need a new outlet I know some shits so hard to swallow And I just can't sit back and wallow
In my own sorrow But I know one fact I'll be one tough act to follow
One tough act to follow Copy One tough act to follow Here today, gone tomorrow
But you have to walk a thousand miles

In my shoes, just to see What it's like, to be me I'll be you, let's trade shoes
Just to see what I'd be like to Feel your pain, you feel mine Go inside each other's mind
Just to see what we find Look at shit through each other's eyes

But don't let 'em say you ain't beautiful OoOo They can all get fucked.
Just stay true to you sOoOoo Don't let 'em say you ain't beautiful
OoOo They can all get fucked. Just stay true to you

I think I'm starting to lose my sense of humor
Everything is so tense and gloom
I almost feel like I gotta check the temperature in the room Just as soon as I walk in
It's like all eyes on me So I try to avoid any eye contact
Cause if I do that then it opens a door to conversation
Like I want that... I'm not looking for extra attention
I just want to be just like you Blend in with the rest of the room
Maybe just point me to the closest restroom I don't need fucking man servant
Tryin to follow me around, and wipe my ass Laugh at every single joke I crack
And half of them ain't even funny like
Ahh Brad, you're so funny man, you should be a comedian, god damn
Unfortunately I am, but I just hide behind the tears of a clown
So why don't you all sit down Listen to the tale I'm about to tell
Hell, we don't have to trade our shoes
And you don't have to walk no thousand miles

In my shoes, just to see What it's like, to be me
All be you, let's trade shoes
Just to see what I'd be like to
Feel your pain, you feel mine
Go inside each other's mind
Just to see what we find Look at shit through each other's eyes

But don't let 'em say you ain't beautiful
OoOo They can all get fucked.
Just stay true to you sOoOoo
Don't let 'em say you ain't beautiful
OoOo They can all get fucked. Just stay true to you sOoOoo

Nobody asked for life to deal us
With these bullshit hands they've delt
We have to take these cards ourselves
And flip them, don't expect no help
Now I could have either just
Sat on my ass and pissed and moaned
But take this situation in which I'm placed in
And get up and get my own
I was never the type of kid
To wait but I know to unpack his bags
Never sat on the porch and hoped and prayed
For a dad to show up who never did
I just wanted to fit in
Every single place
Every school I went
I dreamed of being that cool kid
Even if it meant acting stupid
Aunt Edna always told me
Keep making that face till it gets stuck like that
Meanwhile I'm just standing there
Holding my tongue up trying to talk like this
Till I stuck my tongue on the frozen stop sign poll at 8 years old
I learned my lesson and cause I wasn't tryin to impress my friends no more
But I already told you my whole life story
Not just based on my description
Cause where you see it from where you're sitting
Is probably 110% different
I guess we would have to walk a mile
In each other's shoes, at least
What size you where? I wear tens
Let's see if you can fit your feet

[Chorus]
In my shoes, just to see
What it's like, to be me
All be you, let's trade shoes
Just to see what I'd be like to

Feel your pain, you feel mine
Go inside each other's mind Just to see what we find
Look at shit through each other's eyes

But don't let 'em say you ain't beautiful
OoOo They can all get fucked.
Just stay true to you sOoOoo
Don't let 'em say you ain't beautiful
OoOo They can all get fucked.
Just stay true to you sOoOoo

Lately I've been hard to reach I've been too long on my own
Everybody has a private world Where they can be alone... sOoOoo
Are you calling me, are you trying to get through OoOo
Are you reaching out for me, I'm reaching out for you
sOoOoo Oo Oo

Yea... To my babies. Stay strong.
Daddy will be home soon
And to the rest of the world, god gave you the shoes
That fit you, so put em on and wear em
And be yourself man, be proud of who you are
Even if it sounds corny,
Don't ever let no one tell you, you ain't beautiful

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posted on 06/16/2009&nbs-07:00;@&nbs-07:00;06:06&nbs-07:00;pm

Leave A Scar
http://fubar.com/leave-a-scar/b44477-1034855

"Leave A Scar"

It's not like I made my self a list
Of new and different ways to murder your heart
I'm just painting that's still wet,
If you touch me I'll be smeared
You'll be stained
Stained for the rest of your life

So turn around, walk away
Before you confuse the way we abuse each other
You're not afraid of getting hurt
And I'm not afraid of how much I hurt you

I'm well aware I'm a Danger to my self
Are you aware I'm a danger to others?
There's a crack in my soul
You thought it was a smile

Whatever doesn't kill you...
It's gonna leave a scar
Whatever doesn't kill you...
It's gonna leave a scar
Leave a scar
Leave a scar
Whatever doesn't kill you, it's gonna leave a scar

I'm more like a silver bullet
And I'm like a gun, not easy to hold
I'm moving fast and if I stay inside your heart
I'm certain that this will be
The end of your life

So turn around, walk away
Before you confuse the way we abuse each other
You're not afraid of getting hurt
And I'm not afraid of how much I hurt you

I'm well aware I'm a Danger to my self
Are you aware I'm a danger to others?
There's a crack in my soul
You thought it was a smile

Whatever doesn't kill you...
It's gonna leave a scar
Whatever doesn't kill you...
It's gonna leave a scar
Leave a scar
Leave a scar
Whatever doesn't kill you, it's gonna leave a scar

She warned you that she may fuck me
But the chances are I'm gonna fuck you over
She warned you that she may fuck me
But the chances are I'm gonna fuck you over
She warned you that she may fuck me
But the chances are I'm gonna fuck you over
She warned you that she may fuck me
But the chances are I'm gonna fuck you over

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posted on 08/28/2007&nbs-07:00;@&nbs-07:00;03:08&nbs-07:00;pm

Okay here we are in sadist hell....
http://fubar.com/okay-here-we-are-in-sadist-hell/b44477-499398

See now I am stuck. I always seem to find a way to get myself in a morbid twist of reality. I meet this lady and we click but the thing is she is moving. And this would happen because that is just the way it should be. Who has a right to decide what is supposed to happen? I mean sure, I could bitch and find a way to get her mad at me so it's easier, but I won't. I guess in a way my outter shell is tough but inside I am a silly boy looking for the same thing everyone else is. A peace of mind and a solid soul to call mine. Although I think sometimes God smites me out of spite for digging to deep into his reality but fuck him. I never asked to be born and never asked to feel the comfort of love. I assume just stray and smell and kiss and lick. It makes things easier. Oh and trust me this story is way deeper than you would know. I'm about to leave the house to get some pot and thought that I would dwell on this for a second. And people will probably read half this and rate it a 10 and give me some nice words. =] Thank you but I rather you read my solid real stuff. This is invisiable and is just an excuse to write honestly. Up rise is my way of thinking and Velvet is my lust. I hate niggers. LordTool

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posted on 08/22/2007&nbs-07:00;@&nbs-07:00;10:08&nbs-07:00;am

Something about the moon
http://fubar.com/something-about-the-moon/b44477-489981

There is something, I can't place it, beautiful about everything. I know this is silly to write about but after reading a few lines in one of my favorite books it makes my mind soar with something only music could describe. I've never fallen in love before, but it is my greatest desire. I lust for the chance to look into the eyes of someone and see my own soul staring back. A longing not only for my body, but for my passion. I want someone to drink the well of my spirit and continue to thirst and I want to feel the same insatiable desire to fuse myself with another. I want to feel the pain of jealousy and the screaming desire when they are not by my side. I want and continue to want. I have a fear of love, I suspect as I write this. I'm afraid of giving myself up, releasing the creature behind my mental wall to feed on another. I'm ready for them, but I can't imagine the heartbreak I would feel when they tire of me. I don't think I'll meet that person that dreams in centuries, I don't believe they would want me. I have been scorn so many times the scar tissue is far too thick to achieve secondary nirvana. I have so much love to give, but the problem may not be that woman, it is most likely me. However, when I see that woman, and my icy blood turns hot and boils my flesh with immense desire, I can't bear it. The only union I would have with her would be my fantasy, sticky with sweet words, gentle touch and a deep understanding only a god could appreciate. She does not want me though. She isn't really there. She never really was. But there is something about the moon tonight, as I look into the cold serenity that tells me that maybe, someday, I will experience that delicate bliss so many take for granted... ...one glorious day, I will smile...

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posted on 08/14/2007&nbs-07:00;@&nbs-07:00;07:08&nbs-07:00;pm

Dragon Lily.
http://fubar.com/dragon-lily/b44477-479024

Wow.

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posted on 02/06/2007&nbs-08:00;@&nbs-08:00;09:02&nbs-08:00;pm

For Crystal
http://fubar.com/for-crystal/b44477-211589

How many days? What will be the way? Should I expect? Or leave it at best? Questions huh? We always question.. Well Crystal So pretty and hot like a pistol So much pain been handed to you Feels like God enjoys to abuse But know the truth That he made you strong That when things seem wrong You still pull through like a champ A soldier and a Beauty, bright like a lamp You are a work of art Born to be a solid heart You are Pure You are Gold You are Special You are Beauty You are Strong You are Metaphor You are Parobal You are Perfect You are Speed You are Air You are Water You are Reasons You are Thoughts You are Mother You are Lover You are Fighter You are Peace You are War You are Time You are Heart You are Medication You are Faith You are Wisdom You are Compassion You are Passion You are Security You are Infinity.. You are a mans' dream A childs Angel Smile and be at peace Lay your head down at night with ease Cut away from the Demons That seem to be screaming Close your eyes Clear your mind Think my name I'll do the same Easy is a road that we hear in books Nothing is as it seems or looks I have my war And it's you I adore..... Bradly Kile Carmichael

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posted on 01/14/2007&nbs-08:00;@&nbs-08:00;09:01&nbs-08:00;pm

I love my computer (fun song!)
http://fubar.com/i-love-my-computer-fun-song/b44477-174548

I love my computer You make me feel alright Every waking hour And every lonely night I love my computer For all you give to me: Predictable errors and no identity And it's never been quite so easy I've never been quite so happy All I need to do is click on you And we'll be joined In the most soul-less way And we'll never ruin each other's day 'cuz when I'm through I just click And you just go away I love my computer You're always in the mood I get so turned on When I turn on you I love my computer You never ask for more You can be a princess Or you can be my whore And it's never been quite so easy I've never been quite so happy The world outside is so big But it's safe in my domain Because to you I'm just a number And a clever screen name All I need to do is click on you And we'll be together for eternity And no one is ever gonna take my love From me because I've got security Her password and a key

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posted on 01/14/2007&nbs-08:00;@&nbs-08:00;08:01&nbs-08:00;pm

Too late, or on time?
http://fubar.com/too-late-or-on-time/b44477-174492

Close my eyes and take a breath. Relax and see what I have left. What's really the best. I need to be in a comfort state. A place where there is noone fake. I need to be alone. I need a crowd. So I pick up the phone. But I don't know the number. So I sit and ponder. Will I wait? Or is it just too late. I shed the lies from my eyes. Hide what I know is in my mind. Pretend that I am happy and content. But really my stomach is bent. There is so much I could say. But I will wait another day. I open my eyes and let out that breath. I get a little lost from my own regret.

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posted on 01/14/2007&nbs-08:00;@&nbs-08:00;08:01&nbs-08:00;pm

Dreams.
http://fubar.com/dreams/b44477-174466

She says most men her age want younger women. She thinks her self esteem's not quite itself any more. But she sees herself as more than what the mirror shows, Why that's so important, heaven only knows. When the important part for her is, Souls and heart's sayin': Dreams of sharin' a life and a home. (Dreams.) Of never ever bein' alone again. (Dreams.) Not even diamonds, just a little gold. Someone there to hold her hand when she gets old. Dreams, the kind you know will never end. Forever lovers and forever friends. Someone really there, to love and care, and share, Dreams. She swears she won't divorce a third time. She swears the more she knows about love, the harder it is to find. Her perfect picture of her white horse prince, Is now dependenancy and promises, Someone kind and brave. Soemone not afraid of: (Dreams.) Of never ever bein' alone again. (Dreams.) Not even diamonds, just a little gold. Someone there to hold her hand when she gets old. Dreams, the kind you know will never end. Forever lovers and forever friends. Someone really there, to love and care, and share, Dreams. Oh, Dreams, the kind you know will never end. Forever lovers, forever friends. Someone really there, to love and care, and share, Dreams. She says most men her age want younger women.

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LordTool