4:38pm PST
We've all had our ups and downs. I know I have. Boy, if I were to take the time to give elaborate details on what I've been through especially during the 2nd half of the year, yeah you'd feel bad for me. I don't like pity, so if you felt sorry for me then you're not a good friend.
I'm not going into details..... *sighs* All I know is I want to start of the new year the right way. I will say one thing though... I am not so passionate about LAW but I do for work a law firm. Don't worry... I am no where close to being a paralegal, but I am going to take a couple of legal assistant classes. If you only knew... I was slapped with a lawsuit by a jerk who had the audacity to try to rape me in his own home. I am not going to divulge into this situation as it has been explained in other blogs if you care to see and review.
Then again, I haven't been paying too much attention to myself. I was in an emotional rut. I realized who my friends were and who weren't. That's life oh well. I noticed I could never keep a relationship because I was never looking for one, even though some good guys have come and gone. I haven't even found a great guy just yet, but he'll come when he wants to. It's been almost 15 months since I was single.
I realized what I like and what I want out of a relationship and honestly, it's not much at all. All I want is a guy to be there for me, and for a guy to be my friend and hug me and tell me it's going to be all right. I don't think it's too much to ask. I've been hurt before and if I've hurt other guys b/c I haven't been open and honest, then be it so. Right now I could care less what they think of me, because I know I have not done anything wrong.
Then again, my family has a lot to do with the drama I am living each and every freakin day. Yet at the same time, I am so glad to have a job even though it doesn't pay too much. At least for the time being a job is a job and it doesn't mean I stay home.
Wait, I know I am sort of going off topic about this, but I know I'm not the only one. As I was trying to say earlier, I am going to push myself to do the things I know I am able to do.
I am going to take some legal assistant classes so that I could move up within the firm I'm at. What I really want to do is finish my business prerequisites so that I could go to business school. I want to become a Financial Consultant. Yes, even with the bad economy going, this is what I strive to be. At least I have goals and I want to see to it that I do them. I am sick and tired of putting others in front of me, and have me do nothing about it. It's time I do this and finish what I started.
I only took two classes this past Fall and I did well. I got an A in Macro-economics and a B in English. Oh well, bfd, a B! I know I could've had the A but my trip to San Diego to visit a certain guy really fucked me up. I mean I caught up but I fell behind with two essays, which I did half assed but oh well... different story for another day.
I am slowly starting to come up in the world. I'll admit this, I'm still young. Although I didn't graduate from college/university the way I wanted to, I know that I will eventually. I want this to become a legacy of sorts for when I have children. I don't want them to go through the things I'm still going through.
Ok enough ranting and raving and talking smack... if you care to read what I've been talking about, then YOU'LL read the previous entries. I'm just in an emo mood but it's not so obvious. Today I just felt like typing and that is what I've done so far until I end this right now! :)
Take care..... 4:48pm
