What do you do when no matter what you do you can never do anything right? Hmm.. I mean really can any man ever do enough or the right things to be a good person. In my experience and maybe it is just me. I would say no. Maybe it is the way I go about things, I want ppl to be happy I want ppl to have a good time because life is the only thing that is going to last. Will love never, will hate never, will lust nope, passion for that kiss, will the thrust for knowledge nope, everything fucking fades out no matter what..
Today I woke up with another fucking headache like I have been getting for the last 4 years, today’s and yesterdays were especially bad. They are not migranes they are stress related.. I guess you can say I’m a stress monster, where does it all come from who knows and you want to know what no one really gives a fuck either.
Well, I don’t really think anyone will read this but I’m going to tell a lot of ppl a few things they may not know about me. I will lose some friends over it because I haven’t told them before but I have never once LIED. Some ppl just never ask the right questions, and if they have they know all there is.
I am currently married, I have two wonderful kids that I love with all my heart and soul. I will do anything for them, and nothing in this world will tear me apart from them. I am currently unhappy with my marriage due to some different things, will they change who knows. Do I complain? Not enough to make any difference, I endure it because I can’t allow myself to be removed from my children’s lives. I will stay here until they are old enough to understand or I’m dead. Which ever comes first.
I have/had fallen in love with someone online, but apparently I can’t make her happy either. It tears me apart to think of these things and sometimes I know it would be so fucking easy to blow my fucking head off. I have tried the pills.. lol yeah they only get you really fucked up if you don’t take enough.. :D Cutting the wrist hurts like hell and makes me horny because I’m crazy like that.. :D
So with all that said, if you’re my friend I hope you stay my friend. If you can’t handle me as a friend I understand, sometimes I can’t handle myself ;( I hope to see everyone online, have a great day and pls don’t think less of me for me being me..
If you want to know more feel free to ask, I’m an open book I have nothing to hide. You ask I will answer. :-)
All my love to my baby "Lips of an Angle", who I’m sure hates me atm due to our fight.. I do love you and will never stop but I can’t handle this shit atm..
