People have been asking, "Say, Timmy, what are your New Year's Resolutions?" Well stop your bitchin, here they are.
- Finish my book “Shorliner”
- Research what part of the chicken McNuggets come from.
- Hone my photography skills to the point of being successful.
- Write a screenplay for a Broadway musical based on Theory of a Deadman’s “Bad Girlfriend”
- Dispel all those rumors about me terrorizing circus clowns.
- Discover a true hairstyle
- I want to develop a personal policy for handling that stupid conversation starting question, “You been behaving?” Because honestly, it’s just too probing for me to answer.
- I should stop making so much fun of people. I do that too much. Not you people here at DA, as far as you know.
- I’m going to do everything I can to encourage young people. If they accomplish something, I’m going to say, “You just got lucky”. That way they develop a good, lucky feeling about themselves.
- Laugh more, complain less.
