When I was young, free and living in the country, I would walk slowly along the roadside.
My fingers would play with the weeds and reeds that grew along the trail home.
Some were thin and tall and had small buds that sprouted three quarters of the way up them.
My fingers would pinch the weed and they would slide to the tip and in my hand I would hold the buds.
"Hello baby buds." I would whisper. So close that my lips almost touched the tips.
I would smile and sometimes laugh and sprinkle them on the winds.
These were my favorite.
The winds are sweeter there. Innocent. Fresh with hay and newly turned dirt.
My feet would tap on the gravel, slide through the grasses and it seemed, to me, as if I had all of the time in the world to walk home.
The sun never set before I reached it.
Dinner was never served before I sat down in front of it.
And TIME, it seemed bowed down before me as if i was the queen of tides. The center of the earth.
Now that I am grown. And responsible for myself and my children.
Time, it seems races beside me. Its engines revved and ready to trip me up and pass me by.
There is never enough time for Bills to be payed on time, court lines to be waited in.
There is never enough time to call everyone that I must and pickup all of the prescriptions. Time races and passes and chugs right on ahead.
It smiles and sneers and knows that I need it to slow, and stop and let me catch my breath. if but for a moment.
A ray of hope has shined on me. A small one. That could be huge if i am patient.
Today I breathe a bit easier. I smile and hope, cross my fingers and wish.
I walked Melanie out to her husbands big rig, parked on my small street.
She smiles and issues orders of support. Hugs me and ingests me with love.
And as I walk back into my home. I see on the side of my walkway A thin tall weed. With buds three quarters of the way up.
And without thinking I pinch its body and slide my fingers to the tip, until in my palm I hold the buds.
"hello baby buds." I whisper and smile..
And as I turn to walk into my home, I sprinkle them into the winds.
