BEWITCHING BRUNETTE's blog: "Sexual Fantasy, Come, Dress Up And Play"

Women are not as ‘simply’ attracted to parts as men are. While a man simply sees an ‘ass’ and has a reaction (in fact he usually becomes one in his desire to get one), a woman does not see a part and react with such immediacy. The attraction is not as direct as that. Remember, women take the ‘long way’ to arousal. A woman doesn’t seek perfection. While a man seeks The Perfect Heart-Shaped Ass, women do not have such a physical standard. (Yes, yes, Dona knows a man, an ass man anyway, will respond to virtually any female ass, but there is a ‘holy grail’ of asses he does seek, if only to say he saw it.) This lack of seeking a ‘perfect’ physical trait is why you will find a woman crushing on the oddest parts of men... Women who ‘love’ are often adoring some obscure (ok down-right-strange) part of the man. Frankly, it is also a part that might even be considered a ’flaw.’ Yes, even a flaw she may have one time thought of as ’icky.’ One will comment on the knot on the back of her man’s head, the birthmark on his forearm, the way his left pinky finger is twisted... Why? Partly because it is something so ‘him,’ so unmistakably identifying, that this feature is ‘him’ ~ almost in a fetish sense. A woman is not attracted to the birthmarks, or scars, per se ~ the fetish is not the object, but ultimately the man. It signifies him in a unique manner, and it also means she has complete intimate knowledge of him. Like some secret they share ~ another lover may know but no longer have access... And it is also connected to other things. For example, that twisted finger is a result of an attempt by him at age 5 thinking he could fly off the garage roof, the birthmark made him too self-conscious to wear short-sleeve shirts until he was in his 20s, see what is happening here? Women make little romantic vignettes in their minds. Always. Unless we aren’t. But that is our prerogative. Unlike men, who are slave to visual impulses creating instant responses, women have the luxury of deciding what is & isn’t appealing ~ and when. This does not mean women don’t respond to specific body parts. They do. But not just as you might expect. Women do not see the part as an object of lust & desire (until later as stated above), rather they see parts as examples or symptoms of the type of man he is. For example, a woman who swoons for big python arms, is not necessarily thinking of his arms. She may be imagining herself being held in those strong arms, yes, but likely it isn’t just for the sex scene. She is imagining those arms holding her in front of a warm fire on a cold winter night... Better yet, how did you get those arms? Are you a fire fighter? A construction worker? She may be as in lust with your work as your arms themselves. How? Well, there is a reason why fireman & construction calendars sell each & every year. A great big man, sweaty, with a warm grin, holding a small puppy? *swoon* It’s not the arms, the chest, or the oil ‘sweat.’ It is the romance of the hero. It is the big strong man with a soft side. It is the thrill of a man so strong, yet so gentle... She imagines that she would be so small, lying in those arms... so safe with a man who could hurt her, yet chooses instead to cherish her... A woman sees a part, a body part, and makes this complete portrait ~ the part, in her mind, becomes a ‘whole.’ Because of this making of little vignettes, she is less likely to be a ‘ass girl’ to your ‘ass man’ status. She may like a fine ass, but what will really get her going is how you got that ass, what it signifies to her. Complicated, isn’t it? That’s why vigra for women was deemed a failure. Women are just too darn cerebral for a pill or chemical reaction. Oh, and Mr Adonis? Usually you are not a turn on to women. Unless the woman herself is a professional body builder, fitness trainer, or some such, your need to be in the gym is seen as competition. And you are, frankly, too often a direct assault on her person ~ no woman wants to be watched eating that cheeseburger & hear (in her ears or her head) that you think she should opt for the non-carb salad instead. Men, don’t be discouraged! This means you have a much better chance at getting Ms Perfect Heart-Shaped Ass than you thought ~ You need not be a perfect physical specimen yourself. I have a dear friend who confided in me her love of her mate’s ‘love handles.’ While he worried that his body was not perfect, that that extra whole inch of skin was a ‘flaw,‘ she saw that lack of a 6-pack an indication of his priorities being a match to hers. Rather than being in the gym, or being on some bar league sports team, he was at home reading, creating & spending time with his family. And that’s where she’d rather have him. Well, that, and in their bedroom... Arms/Chest/Shoulders: As stated above, all keys to the ‘strong man’ and romantic visions of being a kitten in his care. These women are usually true romantics. They have a penchant for romantic novels & movies, even if they don’t admit it. Quite often a ‘closet romantic’ will watch adventure movies, even horror flicks, and other stories with a strong male hero figure. It’s all the same: she wishes for both a rescue and a surrender... A variation of this is the Ass/Thigh/Leg lover. Very similar, as these are signs of strength, they are too similar to make a separate category. The only real difference is just a wee-bit more lust, perhaps a bit more mystery as these lower parts are usually less obvious than the upper torso... Hands: Not often known by men, hands are a great turn on to women. For we sensory sluts, hands are key. Display of dexterity, for obvious reasons of sexual potential, and sometimes size are for the lusty among us. For me, a great turn on is the texture of his hands... Mechanics, artists, and those not afraid of do-it-yourself projects are likely to have hands that are not perfectly soft. Signs of ’hard work,’ creativity, brains, and to some degree communication & expression are the fantasies here. They may gush about how great it is that he does this & that around the house ~ how clever he is, it saves them money etc. And yes, that is all true, all part of the vignette. But a nice set of man hands, slightly rough, strong & sure, running along your skin.... *sigh* Hand lovers are lusty and require more of a cerebral element than a romantic one like the women above. Mouths/Chins/Eyes: Yes, a woman may be an eye-lover, where a man cannot. This is because women are seeking the whole package, and men, in general, are much more likely to stop in one spot. Women who adore faces are seeing more than ’handsome’ or ’chiseled.’ They are looking for something very specific. There is some major trigger for them, unique to them usually. Unlike a more universal standard of ’broad shoulders’ or ’strong hands,’ these women are looking for one thing, pass or fail, that a man must pass. Typically these women are those with issues that are significantly rooted deep inside themselves. Be it a past trauma, a high standard for some character attribute, a woman searching faces for the right eyes, chin or mouth has a lofty goal for you to meet. What they are searching for is honesty or some nobility that they both insist upon and rarely find. These women may seem overly shy, ‘picky,’ or even cold with an out-of-your-league attitude. But in reality, she is just not willing to waste her time, or yours, on anything less than what she requires before she gives into her desires. Most women have a touch of this, yes, but for the real connoisseur of ‘faces’ this is a domineering force in selection. If your eye should catch hers, in a good way, be honored. And by all means, live up to it. Or run like hell.

To my knowledge there has yet to be a Webster's definition of a "booty call". The following is my definition of the term: booty call - n 1: the act of calling or contacting a person for the sole purpose of having sex. 2: a person that is the recipient of such a call Some people might think that a booty call is in and of itself a bad thing. I believe for the individual you need to decide for yourself where your morals lie. If you feel for whatever reason, that having sex without strings attached is wrong then you should neither make nor take a booty call. On the other hand, there are those people that can see and accept the booty call for what it is; something that occurs between two consenting adults and nothing more than a physical act. For those people the booty call is totally acceptable. When to Make It When is it ok to make a booty call? Well, I believe that both parties need to be fully aware of exactly where they stand with the other person. Each person needs to know that the booty call is nothing more than that. If there are expectations on either end or emotions attached to the act itself, then problems will arise. For the booty caller, that person needs to make sure that the callee is not expecting anything more from them. It is the responsibility of the caller to make it clear to the callee what their intentions are. This needs to be done BEFORE the booty call has been consumated, not AFTER. Now many people may assume that it is the men that are making the booty calls, but hey, this is the 90's. Women can call the booty just as well as the men. Here, it may be even more important for the woman to make it a point to let the man know her intentions. Some men may assume that when a woman sleeps with them the woman is making some sort of commitment to them and that may not be the case. Regardless of who is making the call, you need to be fair. Just because YOU know where you stand doesn't mean the other person does. You need to get it out there before you put it in there. Honesty is key. Not to mention safe-sex. When to Take It When should you take a booty call? Again people may assume that the callee is always the woman, but again this is not true. Women have needs too (does that sound like a cliche or what?) Also, you might think that no guy in his right mind would ever turn down a booty call. But if the guy really cares about the woman and wants more from the relationship, he should be be equally hesitant to settle for less than what he really wants. If you are on the receiving end of a booty call, you need to ask yourself, what is it that you want? If you are uncomfortable with it or you feel like you're being used, then it would be best to decline. You should never do anything that you feel uncomfortable with. If you know that you want more from the other person than just a bump in the dark, then you shouldn't give in. If all this person wants from you is one thing then maybe you might want to rethink your relationship with this person. You also might want to take a step back and see if this is the right person for you. Do you want to be with a booty caller? Can you live with being a callee? Ultimately that is your decision to make. You should never let anyone pressure you into something you don't want. Be strong and be true to yourself. Everyone needs to decide what is right for themself. If you feel it is morally wrong to make/take a booty call then of course this entire tirade is not only inapplicable to you but you may actually find the entire subject to be repulsive. However, for many people in society today, the reality of life is such that there are such things as booty calls and many of us may experience them at one point in time. When such a time comes you will choose what is right for you. Hopefully it won't be something you jump into without any forethought. In a time when there are AIDS and other STDs to consider, sex is not something to be taken lightly in any situation. With that in mind, I wish you the best of luck in life, love and sex. And hey, let's be careful out there.

To maintain a healthy and positive sexual attitude and appetite, we have to shrug off a lot of excess and unnecessary psychological baggage. All through our lives, we're exposed to conflicting influences about sex and desire. Some people tell us one thing; others tell us the exact or a similar opposite. To those who become confused, it's easy to see that their desire discrepancy factor is going to become crucial and destructive. The simplistic way of looking at this is as if we have a committee in conflict inside our minds, each member wanting to rule what our body does at a given moment. The psychological part of our mind that governs our sexual feelings is called the libido. Now a lot of outside influences affect our libido which, most psychologists seem to agree, is pure desire. Say that with me: "pure desire." Let it linger in your mind awhile. When was the last time you experienced pure desire? When was the last time you reveled in the sheer non-other-influenced desire for sex? Too often we let intruders in to our libido, perhaps barely aware of their invidious and insinuating influences. Now let me tell you a curious secret which shouldn't be one: you are the shaper of your libido. You're the one who feeds your libido the fuel for desire. You -- and you alone -- are the one who can empower your libido, make it wax or wane like the moon. If you feed your libido nothing but images of perfect specimens you deem worthy of your desire, you might as well be starving it, because the opportunity of perfect specimens is going to be so rare as to be virtually non-existent. If you feed your libido a steady diet of negative sexual ideas, fears, guilts, and assorted "bad" influences, you cannot expect it to thrive. And you can safely bet, if that is the case for you, that desire discrepancy is going to rule your sex life. People, as I said before, carry around remarkable psychological baggage that affects their libido. There are men who say, "Well, a blonde screwed me over badly once, so I can't fuck any blondes anymore." There are women who believe because they had one or two or seven bad relationships that they don't deserve a good one and will infest their libidos with such twisting guilt and self-fulfilling negativity that "desire discrepancy" may be a lifelong companion. If it were not for these negative influences on our libido, we would retain "pure desire." That doesn't mean we'd all be sluts falling into and out of bed every few moments, but it does mean that we'd be freed of dishonesty about our sexual urges. We'd have shucked off the preventable "excuses" that widen the discrepancy between desire among partners and return, perhaps, to a more positive attitude about one of life's most pleasurable activities. Whatever the psychological trauma, emotional upheaval, guilt-trip, or repressive element, you must weigh it against the pleasurable feelings of good, satisfying, pleasurable sex and desire and find that negative influence paltry and insignificant in comparison. Wax your libido and watch that sex discrepancy shrink to nothing.

Our sextoy tester discovers a novel use for a Craftsman screwdriver that leaves her wide-eyed and legless Dear Craftsman, It is with great satisfaction and some soreness that I sit down and write this letter. I’m pleased to inform you that the durability and efficiency of your screwdrivers, together with their ergonomic comfort ball design, has resulted in possibly the most amazing experience I’ve ever had with any of my boyfriend’s tools. However, the experience was not without its drawbacks, as will become clearer later. Whilst checking my email last Thursday, I came across a most unusual letter from an Internet company promising to increase the size of my penis. Since I currently lack a penis, I thought to myself, “That will be a feat, indeed,” and innocently clicked the link, curious to discover how one could enlarge something that isn’t there. To tell the truth, I was also looking for some pictures, because the only penis I’ve ever seen belongs to my boyfriend and he only lets me see it late at night, under the covers with the lights off. I’m not quite sure why, but I suspect it's because it curves a bit to one side Although my girlfriends have told me that slight curvature is normal, I think his more nearly resembles a banana—or possibly the letter J. You’re probably wondering what the shape of my boyfriend’s penis has to do with Craftsman tools, and possibly whether I used one of your products to straighten out his misaligned anatomy. Sadly, the answer to that question is 'no', but I would be interested to know if any of your tools could assist in that direction. Well, I found what I was looking for on the website about penile enlargement. In fact, I bit off more than I could chew—or even swallow—so to speak. There must’ve been a dozen pictures, each one displaying a different style of penis; some long, some short; some fat, some skinny; some black, some white. It wasn’t long before these pictures started having a physiological effect on me, a fact brought to my attention by the warm and wet sensation gathering between my legs. I didn’t expect to be aroused so quickly, but, as the creator of Barbie observed in 1959, a young woman is really nothing more than a biological support mechanism for enormously large breasts—or in my case, moderately large breasts and over-active hormones. So I sought to manually release the tension surging through my engorged vagina with whatever instruments I had to hand. I ransacked the house for anything long and tubular, but aside from some tapered candles which I feared might be a little fragile for my muscular thighs, I found nothing. I was about to resort to a woman’s best friend—the showerhead, when I spotted my boyfriend’s toolbox in the corner. It just so happened that my boyfriend was doing some remodeling and his box was full of Craftsman tools, all guaranteed to give complete satisfaction, just as your website claims. I grabbed the longest screwdriver I could find and well—I won't dwell on the details—except to say it left me totally satisfied as a woman, again and again and again. God, how I love that screwdriver! In particular, I found that the comfort ball design of your Craftsman 3/8 x 12 inch screwdriver (Sears item #00941588000), resulted in the best orgasm I’ve ever had without another person. And the second and third ones weren’t bad either. The precision-machined chrome vanadium steel blade allowed for just enough grip to slide the instrument in and out, at first in a slow and steady rhythm that soon quickened to a crescendo of short, fast movements. The grooves machined into the handle also enhanced my enjoyment and had the added benefit of allowing the copious lubrication my body was producing to drain away. I had what I estimate was at least 30 minutes of hip-rocking pleasure at the handle of the Craftsman 3/8 x 12 inch screwdriver, which, I was reassured to discover, is guaranteed for life. After my third shattering Craftsman experience, I slumped back in my chair, shaking like a leaf and let out a long sigh of relief. But as I leaned back, the seat of the chair popped off the base, and I landed on a brass doorknob my boyfriend had carelessly left on the floor in the most violating way, making me cry out even louder than I had at the handle of your fabulous screwdriver. A bit embarrassed, I picked myself up and (slowly) examined the chair. Upon closer inspection, I found that it had collapsed because a screw had come loose, probably due to my previous exertions. Well wouldn’t you know it, I had to use the screwdriver once again, this time gripping the other end which was understandably slippery until I towelled it dry with one of my boyfriend’s tee shirts. I was even more impressed with your product when I found that not only could it send me to the moon and back several times, but it could also be used to repair the chair I had so carelessly broken. Thank you, Craftsman, again and again. Your products are not only an inspiration to the entire tool making trade but also to hormone overloaded women the world over. Since my extraordinary experience with your product, I’ve expressed an interest in purchasing tools of my own and my boyfriend has promised to buy me the Craftsman DeLuxe five-piece Grip-N-Drive Reversible Screwdriver Set for my birthday next month. With these wonderful tools in my hands—or between my shaking thighs—Craftsman will guarantee my satisfaction every day of the week for many years to come and come and come.....

As adults we don’t get to play nearly enough, and fantasy sexual role play is a perfect opportunity to dress up and have fun. Once you’ve decided on who you want to be, where and what you’ll be doing, think about ways to add to your character and role through clothing and props. Picking a sexual fantasy role that clicks with you is key to good sex fantasy role play. Clichés that have no meaning make it difficult to get into character. Transforming yourself into a construction worker or school girl only happens when you can buy into the fantasy yourself ( boots, hard hat, tight muscle shirt, or short plaid skirt, white shirt with lace low cut bra, and knee hi's and to thong or not to thong is all up to you. We must not forget those fuck me heel's which every gal should have.) Whether you’re an expert at swinging from the ceiling vines, or a nervous newcomer to the idea of dressing up and getting down, fantasy sexual role play opens a new world of sexual possibilities. We don’t get to play nearly enough in our adult lives, and most of the socially acceptable forms of play are competitive, with someone always winning and someone else losing. We even bring our social rules and restrictions into our sex lives, which can limit the kind of pleasure and exploration available to us. Sexual fantasy role play is a wonderful way to free ourselves, temporarily, from the restrictions and responsibilities of our daily life, and take on the role of someone else. I can play nurse, maid, biker chick, school girl, lifeguard, red riding hood, lady god diva, damn but will that horse fit in my house,lol, dominatrix, yes sometimes i do like to be in control, doesn't everyone? So kiddies, have fun with fantasy, hugs, kisses, spanks and nibbles!!!!!!