StormDragonZ's blog: "Non-Poetry (Stuff In My Life)"

So I've been up late nights playing video games or computer games. I've still been writing poetry, but since I hardly EVER come on Fubar anymore, I just don't post any on here anymore. If you want my story or new poems, go to my other site, my actual main one: http://stormdragonz.deviantart.com Google search too! Also, a paper around five pages long is due sometime next month, so that's priority #1. Otherwise, I need to start being more alive and say hello to everyone and anyone I know. :)

I'm doing better. Just a moment of needing a break from lots of stress and other things. Poems getting written, doing better in class, and still a bit mixed in feelings, but that's always existed. I hope everyone has a good weekend coming up for Halloween comes this Wednesday. :)

I am starting to not feel happy again. My hands are cold and my body just aches. I've been very quiet to everyone and I just seem to have fallen off the planet to many. I still have my problems with assuming things and not accepting how anything is. Why do people tell me I'm annoying? I really don't know how or why anyone could... but many do. That's the first moment that I begin assuming everyone is out to get me, or just hate me behind my back. I'm 21 and I don't drink. That'll always confuse people whenever I mention it. I want to go to sleep, but I can't. Too cold to want to move, but I have to. I was enjoying my class until I became the forgotten one. I'm not doing well in class, and as always, I'm beginning to once again be seen as that emo kid. The rules of life are making a barrier. I have to get a job, I have to get my license, and I have to get ready for my next move. Should I go visit those who would want to meet me? Should I stay home and hope someone comes to me? Too many questions, and all I want to do is be happy, but again, what does make me happy always can't be gained. I miss my friends and I miss talking to someone all the time. It looks like no one does care... no one leaves a message, no one bothers to call, and no one really shows a form of life to me. Maybe I'm just really being emo and I should grow up. Maybe I am still some little boy inside...

Just so everyone knows, I'm alright and not dead. I haven't been feeling well lately for reasons I can't figure out. I am sneezing and somewhat coughing. My head gets dizzy spells now and then. Hugs are always welcomed. I've been playing Halo 1 and Guild Wars to pass time as well as playing Final Fantasy VI on my PS2 to get my mind off of feeling this way. I'll do my best to come on as much as possible, and if you want to check out my new poems, go to my main poetry site at: http://stormdragonz.deviantart.com *hugs to everyone*

I figured that since I really dislike or flat out hate a lot of things either in the world, or here in the state of New York, or anything at all that seems to annoy me. I'd like to share my thoughts in case anyone has questions on it. This is my own personal thoughts, so what I say may or may not be true. If it offends anyone, all I have to say is I'm sorry you don't like other forms of opinions. So onward! Dislike for October 7th: Escape Being Bored With Alcohol. You might ask, why am I on this site if I plan to badmouth alcohol? I'll answer simply with this... this site doesn't have to do with anything that involves alcohol except watching a meter go up or random photos of people with alcohol. I'm really getting annoyed lately with everyone in the world finding nothing better to do with their lives except discover the essence that being drunk is what it is. I'll admit I've had red wine before, and yeah, I'll admit to having champagne, but why is it that nearly everyone I meet, talk to, even say hello to for five minutes have to admit to drinking alcohol on a regular basis? I mean, come on, am I missing something in life? It would be nice for once to come online, hell, say hello to someone who doesn't drink alcohol. Beer, wine, etc... you know what I mean. From where I live, I see plenty of things worth doing that doesn't involve alcohol, but yet, it still occurs. I don't go out much because that's all anyone does lately. It's even worse when I want to make a friend with someone, and half the time I'm learning about this and that with them and some instance of alcohol. What gets me even more is when I tell people I don't drink and I'm told I'm smart to never start or find myself around people like that. Well, isn't it odd the people who tell me this end up getting wasted the next night. It gets rather hard to believe someone when this occurs. In fact, going through the people who close by me, they either have photos of them drunk, photos of them with a bottle in their hand, or looking like they find themselves not in any form of consciousness. So what can I sum up to say? I don't drink, and I try really hard to accept people who do, but lately, it seems drinking is the only thing people do around here, or do when they get bored, and that's truly sad. I apologize if I offend, again, but please, I wont be your friend if this is what you expect out of life. Also, I see nothing good from alcohol. If you would like to agree or disagree to my comments, feel free to leave me messages or comments. I accept all positive and negative feedback.

Nothing really makes me more annoyed getting told the one thing I really don't want to hear or know. Especially when it comes to a friend of mine. So what I have to say right now is I've found a form of inspiration for my poetry and my story I've been writing. Irony is very nice, but it can also be what I've been needing in my work. So what has happened to me for this to occur? A friend of mine, now someone I just don't want anything to do anymore, decided to just lie about what I really thought of her. I should have known the truth so easily, but unfortunately, I live and learn. So I ask this to anyone who reads this blog... don't lie about anything in life. Only lie when you're in serious trouble. I try my best never to lie, and I've done well to keep my mouth shut when needed and when I need to speak.

I've been thinking on a lot of things. From people I know to those I'll make friends with, from the way society is now to what really made sense on the last episode of Pokemon... whenever that may be, from the many factors of life people go through to end up buried six feet under to why Paris Hilton isn't in the encyclopedia, from how some people fake IDs to get into clubs when they already are getting wasted from lack of an education to reality TV... and what makes sense on TV anymore, and from why the numbers 69, 143, 628, 875, 4,702, 758,285 and 0 can be defined as sexual positions to why Sesame Street doesn't have Canadian puppets... I've been thinking on too much. I think writing and poetry was a step forward. I would like to be able to have my own rant session where I could just complain about anything and everything asked to me. Entertainment is good, but how I would enjoy getting that form of attention. Maybe I'm just silly...

Ever get that sudden feeling of loneliness? I've been entering that little phase again. Seeing too many people happy and enjoying life... makes me get angry at them when I should be happy. I hate when I become this sad. It would be nice to get out of this stupid feeling when I know I have plenty of people who wouldn't mind talking to me, but I feel so rejecting to a lot of things around here. My poetry has come to a stand still, my story chapters tend to not get finished anytime I start writing them. I miss talking to a bunch of people that I always spoke with on occasion, but with school starting up again for some, and me having to realize I have to grow up and move on... it's just rather difficult with all that is going on: -Sister moved out and is getting married. -Can't get a job despite seven applications. -Video games are not helping. -I'm losing a care to write. -Too many people being happy and I'm stuck sitting on a welcome mat. -Got angry at other people just because they're doing well and I'm not. I really have lost my edge with a lot of things. I wish I knew what to do right now in life. I am tired of just dealing with what has been going on...

I'm not going to be home tomorrow. My sister and over 20 other women will be invading the house for her bridal shower. Most likely, I'll be going to the mall to see Rush Hour 3. Hugs to everyone, and for those of you within the New York area, have fun at the State Fair because it plans to be 96 tomorrow. Also, I've been asked by some people to put some of my story chapters on FUBAR. I've decided not to do this. If you want to read my story, go to: http://stormdragonz.deviantart.com Nonetheless, enjoy the remaining few weeks of summer vacation. Children go back to school on the 4th, as do I for a college class called World Literature. No clue what it is about.