A crusty old man walks into a bank and says to the teller at the window, "I
want to open a damn checking account."
The astonished woman replies, "I beg your pardon, sir. I must have
misunderstood you. What did you say?"
"Listen up, damnit. I said I want to open a damn checking account now!"
"I'm very sorry sir, but that kind of language is not tolerated in this bank."
The teller leaves the window and goes over to the bank manager to inform him
of her situation. The manager agrees that the teller does not have to listen
to foul language.
They both return to the window and the manager asks the old geezer, "Sir,
what seems to be the problem here?"
"There is no damn problem," the man says. "I just won 50 million bucks in
the damn lottery and I want to open a damn checking account in this damn
bank, okay?"
"I see," says the manager, "and this bitch is giving you a hard time?"
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A young lady came home from a date, rather sad. She told her mother, "Jeff
proposed to me an hour ago."
"Then why are you so sad?" her mother asked.
"Because he also told me he was an atheist. Mom, he doesn't even believe
there's a hell."
Her mother replied, "Marry him anyway. Between the two of us, we'll show him
how wrong he is."
____________________________________________________________________________________________________
A female computer consultant was helping a smug male set up his
computer and asked him what word he would like to use as a password to log in with.
Wanting to embarrass the female, he told her to enter penis.
Without blinking or saying a word, she entered the password.
She then almost died laughing at the computer's response:
PASSWORD REJECTED. NOT LONG ENOUGH!!!
