Ali the Restless's blog: "Life. Love and Fubar"

OK, well I guess this has to be the last update of this blog, the reasons for which will become apparent if you read on a little..

Chemo has started and bar the odd nausea session and the ever present tiredness, that seems to be going ok... Radiotherapy started too... Unfortunately, that has been a problem. Things aren't going great and they have had to stop.. The reason??

Well I'm lead to understand that radiotherapy irradiates the general area where the cancer is and kills the cells there. This is actually quite a good thing because whereas cancer cells don't regenerate, the human bodys cells do! Yayy!! Way to go cells!! Yeah, they regenerate and become as good as new... all except mine! Mine for some reason disintergrate. After just 3 sessions, they have had to stop because I am having a bleed problem from not only my mouth and nose, but also from some quite substancial skin damage around my general chest area... And for some really strange reason, most of my teeth have suddenly become loose.... Cool huh!!

So what does this all mean?? Well, having been in the hospital since Wednesday, and having had numerous tests carried out, I have been told today by my doctor, that they can't go on with the radiotherapy (really???) because of the damage it's causing, but they would be continuing with the chemo.. And what will that mean in the long run??? Ahhh... the $64,000 question!!!

It means dear friends, that my chances of surviving this thing have been reduced by about 80%. Yes 80%!!! So what will happen?? I will keep trying because that's just my nature, but it's unlikely that I'll be around much more than 2 years. If I'm lucky maybe a little longer. So the blog has become pretty much redundant.

I've been on Fubar for a few days over a year and on the planet for a few days under 55 years. I guess the time has probably come.

I just want to thank all my friends here on Fubar, for their strength and friendship that they have so freely and unreservedly given, to those who dislike me, I'd like to thank them too, for providing me with a cause to come back each day for the entertainment that they so weirdly provide, and most of all, I thank you baby for giving me.... well pretty much everything. I love you, more than I can ever express with words alone, and always will, no matter what.

Thank you all for your patience with me and for all the love you have shown me over the past year... As long as I am able to be here, I will always return that love.