In The Beginning.
It was early on in life I realized that one: I loved women, and two: I had somehow been “here” before. There were many things I’d found were easy to learn and program into my daily way of life. Many tasks and concepts came more as “natural” than were taught to me by my parents. I guess you could say I was born pretty instinctual. I’ve learned over the years to trust these instincts and always allow myself opposition to them. I remember the first time I told my mother about a scene I’d witnessed between her and my father. It was what I’d perceived as a hostile scene with my mother on her back beneath my father and she was in pain. I’d noted she was pregnant in the memory and the clothes her and my father were wearing.
My memory was and is very vivid and detailed, however I was not yet born during this event. I’ll never forget the response I got from her when I told her about the memory. She looked at me in a sort of horror and disbelief while reliving the moment and said “You can’t remember that, you weren’t even born yet.”
My instinct was of course to pay her disbelief no heed and continue knowing that I had in fact had that explicit memory in its vivid detail.
I kept true to that instinct and it still serves me well today in my quest for knowledge and enlightenment. As were taught many things by our parents some of us are taught more than others. We are also sometimes taught what to believe and what not to believe. This is wrong. As a parent myself I find that placing limitations and demands upon our children to expect them to believe in anything based on our own beliefs is a complete waste of time and denies our children from experiencing a full and colorful life.
What may be good for the goose is not always good for the gander.
I was fortunate as I see it that my father was a devout Atheist (Actually a Protestant off the record) and my mother a part time Christian as neither of them had any will to send me off to church.
I feel to this day we can learn more important information at home or in school versus in church where you’re only being taught one version of one subject.
It seems quite limiting and an impractical use of “Time”.
Aside from my parents beliefs religiously speaking they believed in divorce.
They believed in a great many fruitless and futile ways of “being” and of course this was something I learned quite fast and quite well indeed.
On Sunday while the other children went to church, my father and I would sit around and eat ice cream in out underwear and watch a lot of westerns and a lot of horror. The westerns were cool I guess but what really got me excite were the horror movies. All the suspense and shock was definitely my version of a good time.
The term “Horror”:
Pronunciation: 'hor-&r, 'här-
Function: noun: painful and intense fear, dread, or dismay.
(Source: Merriam-Webster's Medical Dictionary, © 2002 Merriam-Webster, Inc.)
Horror is the feeling of dread and anticipation that occurs before something frightening is seen, heard, or otherwise experienced. (Terror is the feeling that follows after the experience has occurred.)
Compare: the experience of waiting for a scary monster to jump out of the closet (horror) with the experience of actually seeing the scary monster after it has jumped out (terror).
Source: Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia © 2001-2006
Horror in fact became my instant “drug of choice” and has remained my favorite aphrodisiac and means of entertainment since. Horror gave me the outlet to express my inner emotions and anxieties without fear of repercussion from others.
Horror became my safety blanket and my best friend. As I would grow to not only love but endure many horrors I constantly seek the next “fix”. This addiction has led me places I never thought I would ever travel and I do mean ever.
There are those of us of course who care not for horror, those who are timid and afraid of the dark. I have traveled within the deepest realms of horror and I still walk this Earth although always questioning my sanity. If there were but a guide to those who still fear the dark, then that is what I shall be. Horror is inspiration by which we test our strength to resist that which we fear and become mentally and spiritually strengthened. Horror is not only a sensory perception but a visual perception as well.
Throughout the history of mankind we find pictures and literature that depicts horror and events of horrific nature. Early “Caveman” might describe the horror of encountering a saber tooth tiger perhaps on the wall of his cave dwelling in the hopes of teaching others the danger of this beast and perhaps mark the “time” at which he lost his arm to that particular beast. The ever lasting visual scars of the Nazi Death Camps of World War II will forever remain in the eyes of those who look upon them with horror. The sounds from the black box device located in a commercial aircraft as the crew and passengers are burnt alive.
Horror can come to us in many forms at many levels from daily horrors to those times we never forget. You might find horror comes in the form of a sudden stop by the vehicle in front of you as you travel down the freeway or you might find horror while washing your face in the shower and the sound of the shower curtain being flung open when nobody else is there with you. Both have the same cause and effect the anticipation of things unknown to come and the fear of what could happen.
Horror in effect forces our minds to consider the possibilities and potential outcome of the situation. Will you die burning in your car on some chunk of the freeway? Will some madman slash your neck as your eyes burn filled with soap as your gaze falls to the red shower floor? Your mind becomes “creative” and alive with energy which has a “Domino effect”. Horror brings us to making one of three decisions and although we generally refer to this as a “Fight or Flight” response we forget the third option of “Do Nothing”. As the third option does not appeal to the psychology behind self preservation it in all truth does in fact at time do just that. An example:
You are walking next to a nice peaceful stream when suddenly the unmistakable sound of a rattle snake at your feet alerts your senses there is danger.
Do you:
A: Reach down and grab the snake and rip his head off.
B: Turn and flee in Terror.
C: Do nothing.
The answer of course being, C: Do nothing.
If you answered otherwise please note the correct answer was
C: Do nothing.
There are of course times “Fight or Flight” applies. Based on self preservation the “Fight or Flight” approach can also have varied effects. We have to in fact choose rather carefully based on the situation at hand and any or all previous experience with it. In the case of Horror we either have little or no previous experience with the situation therefore we are horrified in our ignorance.
By the time we reach this point our mind has increased its level of synaptic responses and our brainwave levels have increased greatly.
The body at this point begins producing adrenaline in our heightened state and we are now in the state between Horror and Terror.
I hear stories constantly about “Guardian Angels” and “Protective Forces” from those I’ve spent time talking to about “Life”. The details may vary slightly from story to story but each story is the same in essence. Some unknown “Force” or “Presence” appears to warn or save us from certain demise. In some cases there is an embodiment of this “Force” or “Presence” and in others a more Empathic feeling of protection or foreboding. The arrival of a protective force during times when we are in a state of horror has been interpreted in many ways throughout history.
Mans interpretation of these events has led to great controversy over the centuries.
In both Mythology and Religion we find many stories of “Divine Intervention” where the appearance of a force or embodiment has saved the life of the author or person in the author’s life and this “Force” or “Embodiment” although a mystery was labeled in order to signify it as a being of existence. Personal perspective and rumor are the leading causes of misinformation yet quite often make their way into history in ways that have altered the existence of man and his behavior. Entire belief systems have evolved around one mans interpretation of an event. Thus of course controversy of interpretation evolves on a worldly scale.
Early in man kinds existence he was far greater shrouded in ignorance than in today’s modern world where we can find an education in many subjects and with far greater ease than interpreting a cave drawing. With the invention of literature and then the invention of the printing press man’s knowledge increased greatly and his ignorance declined. However in the procreation and passing on of misinformation man was still under the shroud of ignorance and untruth.
As man grew in knowledge many of his perceptions would change or evolve into laws, theories, and speculation and the world around him would reflect these changes. Man found his ability to communicate his perspectives and ideas farther and faster and found it was especially easy to convince or relate his with others who would read his work and make their own assessment of his words, descriptions and perspective. As in any interpretation each human will have or form a different perspective of the information he or she is gathering and how it relates to them in importance and meaning. Then in time they will pass on this information to others in their life as it is common to do. Its when we pass down these blocks of knowledge that we lose information and fact in the translation.
An Example:
Truth: Rob was walking across a busy street and found himself stuck in traffic waiting for a break in which to finish his journey across the street to grab a coffee at a coffee stand he regularly visited. Unfortunately Rob was struck down by a bus that had veered to miss another pedestrian who had stepped into the way of the bus.
Translation: Rob got hit by a bus while crossing the road.
Effect: Here we have a difference of 52 words, 52 words that described the exact conditions of “How Rob met his fate”. Where and why have been dulled in order to easier convey the message and the event is transmogrified from truth to a clouded and very less detailed history of the actual event. We find as well the alteration of words from their actual truth to a modified version in the words “street” and “road”.
We have an unclear image of the truth.
To think the history of mankind could fall prey to this form of inaccurate and clouded translation is indeed worthy of further study to anyone seeking the truth.
It is more often than not truths fall prey to misinterpretation and poor translation than are explained thoroughly and in detail due to man kinds need to explain or comprehend things immediately or feel unenlightened, ignorant or unknowing.
It’s when we consider just how this form of misinformation finds it way into history, religion, government and our own lives at an up close and personal level. In the earliest days of man kinds “Enlightenment” many of histories most famous texts would have to be read or translated by scholars in order to teach or relay the information held within these texts to the masses. We know that there are many well used languages throughout the world and that many of them translate poorly at times with each other. It is human nature to “fix” these errors in translation with “the closest meaning” word and this again generates a degradation of the original text and therefore the truth finds itself further clouded by the perspectives of man.
Let’s look again at the stories of the “Guardian Angel”.
Here we have a “Domino Effect” of circumstances that result in the phenomenon called “Divine Intervention” in where we combine Horror with Adrenaline, a spike of natural energy and brain activity. This electro-chemical reaction will of course have its own “Domino Effect” on the physical body as well as the mental state of our “victim”. The anticipation of harm creates many visual representations in the brain which is already overloaded with activity thus causing a greater load on the circuitry of the brain and increasing electrical (synaptic) energy as well. Endorphins being a chemical reaction to bodily trauma begin to be produced by the hypothalamus and pituitary gland causing a state of semi-euphoria or “wellness” around us.
Our minds alive with the visual representations of things to come and overloaded with electrical activity can and will cause many “Short Circuit” responses in where two or more synaptic impulses will in fact collide and the energies become impure from the original source. This being yet another representation of the clouding of truth at the personal level the brain is now overloading and sending misinformation to our senses. There is a fine line in the mind between reality and fantasy.
Our mind now overloaded becomes an unreliable source of information and our perspective is now altered by the electro-chemical reaction we are experiencing being in the state of “Highness” our interpretation of the world around us becomes surrealistic and fact easily falls prey once again to fiction.
Question: If the other animals in the animal kingdom have a premonitory or as we refer to it as a “Sixth Sense” why don’t we?
Answer: Yes it has been observed in many cases that other animals will seem to sense the coming of danger. This behavior has also been seen in many humans as well.
This behavior can cause the same response to Horror that a physical even can.
We have all of the same conditions up and to the point of the actual event.
This can of course cause the “Vision” or “Feeling” of a “Guardian Angel” warning us of imminent disaster or harm to ourselves or others once again causing an interpretation of factual events to become distorted by the brains inability to produce truthful information. This too is even before we try and translate the specific event in words we find “Best Relate” the occurrence to another.
Many simple events that were previously unexplainable have become indeed very explainable with the progress we have made in the sciences and sociology.
Among these advances you will find many contradictory theories and facts to previously held beliefs and laws. Man kind in order to free him self from ignorance has of course always been willing to give answers to questions he know not the answers for. You will always know that one person we call a “Know it all” who of course really doesn’t know one half of what he claims to know and is rarely “right”.
Throughout history this type of person has existed as well as the humbled man who speaks not of what he knows. We will also find in literature that many “Stories” have evolved into beliefs and common behaviors found in humanity. From authors such as the likes of Samuel Clemens (Mark Twain), H.P. Lovecraft, and Gene Roddenberry to the prophetic writers such as Nostradamus or Zoroaster come many great works of fact and embellished interpretation of facts and information. From these writings we find real life events or happenings in a personal aspect that have been translated and read by millions for many years, stories that have changed the way we as humans think and act.
This of course brings me to the subject of religion. Before I talk about religion I feel it best I of course describe my personal background with religion. I never figured myself for a religious person until I found society needed to have some point of reference from which to judge me and my moral views. This of course I was reluctant to partake in, but managed to come up with my “best interpretation” of the truth. I have studied religious writings as well as occultism and paganism and learned to separate them by groups for each group seems to be at war with the other while most preach “Peace and Harmony” they also tend to preach hatred and violence of one kind or another. I found throughout my reading and studies that my personal beliefs fall best under the Luciferian “concept”. I use the term “concept” as I still do not find myself religious but merely putting a name to the face of my reality for better understanding of my personal perspectives and beliefs by society and the reader.
Coming from an open minded background and lifestyle I was fortunate enough to avoid what I refer to as “Brain Washing” or “Outside Influence” to my own beliefs and allowed to form them on my own as my life dictated and revealed to me.
Throughout this time I’ve kept most of my gained wisdom and knowledge from society to better protect myself from discrimination and the hatred bred by other forms of thought. I found that speaking my beliefs was not wise when in the company of those who have been taught in absolutes, those who have been fitted with psychological blinders and those who have been blinded by misinformation and the clouding of truth. Telling someone they are “Wrong” is never a good idea and telling them they are “Right” serves no better a purpose. Being able to listen to the thoughts, perspectives and beliefs of another with an impartial and unbiased mindset is not an easy task at least for my self. Like many I too would correct someone when I feel they are “Wrong” and in that, I give my best effort to avoid such judgmental behavior. With this in perspective I will also try and write with an open mind and not in absolutes. I will write from personal belief and thought and my words will hopefully be read with curiosity and not taken as “The way it is” for even I like anyone have fallen prey to misinformation at one time or another. Ignorance is not a bad word and it is a very common way of being as until we “know” we plainly just don’t know. Until we have all the facts we can merely be left to speculate.
With this I shall now begin the deciphering of my knowledge into the best readable and truthful form I can manage. You may at any time of course stop reading as I would ask not that which I would not do myself I will not ask you to take one moment of your time to stop and read the thoughts and beliefs of another.
