This past few months have allowed myself to be further engaged in the "dating scene" …. I've had some nice moments, but they normally follow up with aimless wondering. People can be sometime-ish, up and down, high and low.
Balance ceases to exist in this game.
Therefore, how many participants in this game are balanced? Answer: none! This may seem dramatic, but consider the fact I said those who are participating in the game, those who I feel are balanced may be aware of the game but choose not to engage.
Encounters, Meetings & Dates are not accidents... …all of which seldom lead to relationships anymore… without relationship, building trust, friendship, companionship, where does LOVE have a chance to grow? Answer: it doesn't!
Lust is rampant in people more than ever; it is a controlling force that is destroying those who it resides in and those who it "attacks"…. Lust grows and is a spirit, therefore, it is alive, transferable and has a mission….it is NEVER satisfied. It's mission? Destroy the plan of God for healthy, balanced, loving relationships. .
My mind is not simple, it's analytical and thinks too much at times, but I'm done making apologies for it , I am who I am, I'm a thinker and my mind is not inside your head so I don't expect you to think like me, and vice versa…I guess that's what makes us all unique? Our minds…. which are attached to our emotional make up, if only I could see inside other people's minds at times, I think life would be less of a strain trying to work it out!! …but we all get to a point where we are done with second guessing, wondering WHY…..it all leads to CONFUSION, which is not healthy. From flexing on the dating scene, my mind has encountered much confusion, second guessing, wondering, there has not really been any certainties, securities, anything of any REAL substance…amid much excitement, fireworks, it holds no meaning..
…. It gives the appearance that it's lovely, but looks can be deceiving, it means nothing…..most of the time…
So many people are purely looking for sex and not relationship… they do not take the time to really find out who a person is, in fact they seldom see a person in front of them, but instead just a physical presence they need to enter, devour and move on.
We lead busy lives which are increasing in speed every second we breathe; we get to stages in our life, take a look in the rear windscreen and wonder where has our life gone?
This is not where we planned for our life to be….but instead of STOPPING and evaluating and then taking action to remedy those things we have missed out on, we continue in the spiral of life, the same path we have been travelling, only to press the accelerator that little bit harder…what is wrong with us? …
Have we lost all hope and joined "everybody else", only to add to the pain, destruction of possible LOVE and emotional turmoil we all cause one another….
What if…..we slowed down and valued relationship, friendship, people, new and old, more than we value money, careers, and things?
What if…. we took time to look past the girl's curves, the guy's lips to actually find out the substance and very essence of WHO they are?
What if….. we used self control to tell our flesh what to do and not the other way around?
What if….. we actually respected others, whether we just met them or have known them for years?
What if….. when we said we would call, we actually did?
What if….we actually put others before ourselves? Giving rather than taking..
Emotional absence is worse than physical absence; a person can know that you are at least thinking of them if you connect… yet you can be sitting next to a person and they may as well be invisible anyway, but you can be 5000 miles away from a person, yet they connect with you via whatever means they have on a regular basis. The results are always valuable, for what you sow you will reap from it…bad or good….
Connecting…does this really take time to do? How long does it actually take to send a text? An email? or even, make a phone call?....stop and think on it, if you have a few seconds to!! lol ….those seconds, or minutes you use to connect will not have a detrimental effect on your life….think about it…
People seem to have it so wrong these days…the whole world is one big game, of which, I don't wish to play…dating in itself comes with rules, of which are foolishness and backward…..the whole "wait for some time before calling her" thing for example, "make her think your not eager", well if I've been on a date and he hasn't called me within 2 days, my assumption is he's not interested… after all…life is short and who has the time or the ENERGY it takes on the mind to consider and WONDER?! If they can't even pick up the phone? Cheque please…NEXT! This in itself feels cold to even me, but yet, we all need to live in reality, and does this person display the characteristics of someone who you want to get to know further? Hmmmmm…let that marinate…
People are complex, and a lot of times, stupid, yes I said stupid, people claim to Keep it Real, but if you are keeping it real, you don't play games especially with people's minds…..the mind is fragile and dangerous, it causes people to do many good and evil things in this world….we need to nurture and protect ours and each others.
We talk about LOVE and peace in the world, but yet if our own "relationships" are based on games, un-caring attitudes, selfishness etc then what contribution are we making towards what we say we want in the world?
Changing the world starts at home, and when I say home, I don't just mean you, but every person you CONNECT with. Let's stop using people as pieces of meat or things we can pick up when we desire, let's value that person for who they are. They are somebody's daughter or son, brother or sister, mother or father….
People are life and life is precious…
End transmission.
Weekend Glory by Maya Angelou
Some clichty folks
don't know the facts,
posin' and preenin'
and puttin' on acts,
stretchin' their backs.
They move into condos
up over the ranks,
pawn their souls
to the local banks.
Buying big cars
they can't afford,
ridin' around town
actin' bored.
If they want to learn how to live life right
they ought to study me on Saturday night.
My job at the plant
ain't the biggest bet,
but I pay my bills
and stay out of debt.
I get my hair done
for my own self's sake,
so I don't have to pick
and I don't have to rake.
Take the church money out
and head cross town
to my friend girl's house
where we plan our round.
We meet our men and go to a joint
where the music is blue
and to the point.
Folks write about me.
They just can't see
how I work all week
at the factory.
Then get spruced up
and laugh and dance
And turn away from worry
with sassy glance.
They accuse me of livin'
from day to day,
but who are they kiddin'?
So are they.
My life ain't heaven
but it sure ain't hell.
I'm not on top
but I call it swell
if I'm able to work
and get paid right
and have the luck to be Black
on a Saturday night.
