Today I am going to celebrate my grandmother's 85th birthday. At first glance I would not say that she is an elder who helped shape my life, but maybe that's me being defensive.
From the time I was born until recent years I spent every Sunday and most holidays at her home. She has six children, 24 grandchildren, and 12 great-grandchildren and because of her we are a very tight family, all of us seeing each other at least once a week for Sunday dinner. It was very unusual if one of us would miss. She is indeed, the glue that holds out family together. She lived in the same house from her marriage at age 15 until recently when she married her third husband at the age of 82. During all that time she rarely left our county and has only left West Virginia on one occasion that I can remember.
Her manner is such that people might think that she is not the brightest person in the world. Once she asked what my new phone number was and I told her "0182". Grandma replied, "OK, I can remember that! All I have to do is think of...a zero, and then a 1...and that just leaves the 82". I sarcastically can say, "Brilliant!" but she's never forgotten it.
Her toilet once had the condition that most toilets will get in their life - you had to wiggle the handle to get the water to stop running in it. One time the minister of her church had Sunday dinner with us and asked to use the restroom. Grandma showed him where it was, and then after he closed the door she went back and yelled to him, "Hey! If your water won't stop running, just shake that little thing a time or two!" I think I cried all day.
Since I was a kid she's taught Sunday School in her church, the old country church up the holler that my family and everyone else that lives near attends. February 14 fell on a Sunday when I was a teenage, my mind in the gutter, and grandma helped the kids make hearts to pin on their shirts. As I sat there watching her students come out of he classroom, I heard them talking:
"You children look so nice wearing your hearts! Derrick, do you have yours?"
"Yes grandma"
"Patricia, do you have your heart?"
"Yes Brooksie"
Then grandma proudly announced to the entire congregation, "Look at us! We all have a heart on!"
I can't look at a Valentine without laughing to this day.
I'm really not a lot like her at all, but when I think about it, I try very hard to be. I've never heard her gossip, or talk ill about anyone. She doesn't dwell on problems or heartaches. She just laughs them off and moves on to things that make her happy. I sure wish I could do that.