Twas the night before Christmas–
Old Santa was pissed.
He cussed out the elves
and threw down his list.
Miserable little brats,
ungrateful little jerks.
I have a good mind to scrap the
whole works!
I’ve busted my ass for damn
near a year, Instead of
‘Thanks Santa’–
what do I hear?
The old lady bitches cause
I work late at night.
The elves want more money–
The reindeer all fight.
Rudolph got drunk and
goosed all the maids.
Donner is pregnant and
Vixen has AIDS.
And just when I thought that
things would get better
Those assholes from the
IRS sent me a letter,
They say I owe taxes–
if that ain’t damn funny
Who the hell ever sent
Santa Claus any money?
And the kids these days–
they all are the pits
They want the impossible–
Those mean little shits
I spent a whole year making
wagons and sleds
Assembling dolls…
Their arms,
legs and heads
I made a ton of yo yo’s–
No request for them,
They want computers and robots…
they think - I’m IBM!
Flying through the air…
dodging the trees
Falling down chimneys
and skinning my knees
I’m quitting this job
there’s just no enjoyment
I’ll sit on my fat ass
and draw unemployment.
There’s No Christmas this year!!
now you know the reason,
I found me a blonde.
I’m going SOUTH for the season
- last post
- 15 years ago
- posts
- 83
- views
- 33,308
- can view
- everyone
- can comment
- everyone
- atom/rss
Copyright © 2024 Social Concepts, Inc. All Rights Reserved. Patent Pending.
blog.php' rendered in 0.0608 seconds on machine '179'.