What kind of person should I be?
In answering that question, many possibilities come to mind. I think that there is who I am, who I think I am, who I want to be, who I wish I wasn't, and many more ways to explore that question. I explain to my children about how they need to be them selves. I watch them struggle, as I do, to figure out who that is. People change "who" they are with different people. There are different "hats," if you will, for each individual you meet. Everyone I know is going to have a different opinion about who I am and who I should be. That is because I would not act the same with some as I do with others. I believe that the person I am (or the person that everyone is) is a basis of your parents, and then a piece of every family member, friend, or significant other you have ever met. If it were not for ONE of them, YOU would be different. There is that person your parents want you to be, the people who love you who think they know what is best for you, try to convince you of who you are. The good student, the great mom, a loyal friend, or some other form of what people perceive me to be…or am I just me. Do I live my life for me or for someone else? Am I being true to me and who I am or am I falling into a realm that someone has placed me? Is there true happiness to being who I am or falling into what others expect? I think there are times in which expectation is the root, which grows uncontrollably disabling me from flourishing into who I was meant to be.
In deciding, what kind of person I should be is again perception and expectation. Should be or want to be are the pulls of life that control everyone into some form of transition. Mood changes and different levels of actions portrayed for each person, only emphasized with those you are most comfortable. I heard this story once about a little boy and his mom. The story explained how the mom had more respect and tolerance for a perfect stranger than she did for her own son. Not because there was not total love and respect for her child, but because the demands placed on a person everyday has tendencies of enabling a person to let go when in the presence of someone they know and trust. Who is this mom? Who does she think she is when she is faced with a stranger, versus faced with her own child? I believe that is where confrontational skills derive from. I believe your level of skill is based on how comfortable you are with yourself. Every day I am faced with the questions of life, am I happy, am I where I am supposed to be, am I happy with the choices I have made, and most importantly, am I happy with the kind of person I AM?
