I woke up this morning happier than usual fer a V-day. Being single has always been the biggest setback fer me on this day. The culture we live in has been so sucked up into the commercialism of the holiday, that I almost feel like I have to buy somebody something just to keep meself sane and happy. They make yer depressed when yer cannot give or receive...just like Christmas but we won't go there, that's a whole other rant. Still, I guess the two main things that keep me from plunging this morning is that I woke up to it raining outside. No, I'm not secretly chuckling at all the lovers caught in the rain somewhere. If they're smart they'll create some real romance where they are and leave it at that. Create, that's what love is all about. The improvisation of it all, the unexpected kiss, touch, flower...whatever, use yer imagination instead of a hallmark card and heart-shaped box of chocolates (unless he/she really wants the chocolate, then yer get it because if there is one thing I have learned it is NOT to get in the way of yer partner and his/her chocolate...wow). Anyway, I digress.
So I woke up to the rain and a Shane Ward (currently playing!)cd playing in me stereo system. I rolled out of the bed (always on the right side) and went to the kitchen to fix a cup of coffee. I sat at the balcony and just smiled. Everything was alive this morning, birds chirping and squirrels scurrying. The air felt so fresh and new and I had to start wondering how I was going to get through this day happily. Me first plan of business was to stay home and not go to the get-together outing with me friends . Hence, I had a really interesting early morning dream, so I figured I would just settle with thinking about that fer a while and jotting some things down. Hehe
So that's that, and even with all of that I still feel lonely. You would think that after 3 years of being single on V-day yer would just finally get used to it. Cafes and work can only do so much before the chill slowly fills yer heart again. I'm just hoping that I can make it through this day without too much thought of what could be. I think I'll watch a movie (not horror/thriller in any way, lol) and then just listen to some music (which could be tricky).
Still, I want to wish everyone a Happy Valentine's Day. And if yer are lucky to have someone to enjoy the day with and be happy, then with all of me heart I hope this day is everything yer could have dreamed fer. I hope that love fills every step yer take together and passion fuels every kiss. I hope that when yer both wake up tomorrow, there will be no wondering why but confirmations of why those hearts are joined chest to chest. Rise and be thankful fer love is a rare commodity these days. If yer have it I dare yer to let it go...fer if yer do I dub yer the biggest fool this world has ever seen. Take care everybody and I love yer all. Mwahhhhhhhhhhhhh
Love,
Chazz
