Tudorose's blog: "It's not Personal...oh wait...it Is"

Dear You Know Who You Are,

Well played. That was a stellar performance. I knew the first time he talked about you moving in. I knew the first time he took you to dinner. I knew when you made no effort to thank me or contact me, as you had stated all you wanted was more friends. I knew when you kept impeding on my time. I knew when you whined for a hug while he was with me. I knew when he blew off my family time and again even though we had plans first. I knew when you sent me that "nice" text after the concert. It was none of your business even to write. I knew when you asked me how we met. I knew when he brought you to dinner. I knew when he ignored me in front of my kids. I knew when he didn't hug me good bye. I knew when he went quiet, and I knew when at 5am I woke up and just wanted nothing more than to go be with him...I knew what I would find. I knew you'd make your move with your kids gone. Don't pretend I'm crazy or lying...
I tried to be a friend, even with knowing what you are. I know you have hardships, I get it. We all do. I get that the husband is a controlling psycho, perhaps he's who you learned from, or maybe it's all a lie... I tried to see some other side, I wanted to be wrong, but as I always knew. This was the real you.

So thank you for proving me right. I know he doesn't see it, cause he always trys to see only the good in people. He has an addiction for saving people. You preyed on it. You won. He falls for takers. Just like he fell for his ex wife. Just like he fell for Cali Girls sob story. He fell for you. There is no type or amount of medicine that can justify your behavior, or make you numb for it.
All I've ever tried to do is spend time with him, and protect him from those who he doesn't even realize are threats. Don't think I don't hold him accountable as well, he will hurt, and he will see his errors. He'll pay, just as he has had to in the past.
If you could only be friends though, you would have stopped it. If your moral code was really as rigid as you made him think... You would have cut him off even in pining. You would have stopped any and all advance and ended any confusion, but you didn't...
If you truly respected that he was with me, you would not have flirted. If you had respected he was with me, you would have explained how his holding out for you, was only making things worse. If you had respected me, like he said you did, none of this would have been an issue. But you didn't, as I knew you wouldn't, and here we are.
You sold him this bs dream and kept flirting. You said all the things that make you look like the nice respectable choice. You said things that kept you unattainable and so more desireable, while looking supportive of me, but you weren't. You manipulated, and I knew you would. He kept trying to figure out why I couldn't let it go... Everything I told him would happen...did. Cause I knew...

I don't have much, but I love deeply, and am fiercely loyal. I stand on my own two feet, because my kids deserve the kind of mother that can show them strength, perserverance, and independence. I stand on my own 2 feet, because I want them to know not to give up, and they can be proud of me. I "lived" for my kids by providing for them in all ways. I myself can be proud to know my children are brillant, kind, capable, independent, and will make amazing adults. I did that! On my own! I've known several women who've by some circumstance or another had to do the same. They have my respect. They earned it. I can guarantee, it's a journey well worth the reward. You should try it.
I hope for your kids' sake you find the strength to turn your life around for them, and make the journey on your own, but I'm not holding my breath.
As for my family, I've always had one rule. Disrespect me, or those that I care for, and we're done. As such, I will spend time only with those worthy to be in our lives.

Best of Luck

The incomparable, Me