I woke up this morning and the realization hit me that exactly one year ago today I began my last day I had with Sheila before she died in her sleep. What is so sad is that I remember so little of that day. Did we go to church that day? What was she wearing? What did we talk about? What did we eat? Did we make love? A whole day... and it's gone from my memory. I lived it just like any other day..not really paying too much attention to what was going on. If only I had known what I know now I would have savored each and every moment with her. Looked at her with new eyes. Memorized every freckle, every line, every curve, the exact shade of blue in her eyes. And then today I could have replayed that day and relived it. But I didn't know. And I let that day slip away. All I remember for sure about that day is that we went to WalMart and bought the DVD of Charlotte's Web to watch together the next morning while we drank our morning coffee. And we cuddled and kissed goodnight and told each other, "I love you." I cried today. I miss her.
