Any more than two shakes after you are done peeing is considered masturbation.
Al Gore is as much of a scientist as L Ron Hubbard was a religious prophet.
Professional wrestling proves there are many closeted homosexuals in the south.
MC Rove should have shown Laurie David and Sheryl Crow his pimp hand.
I would like to hear Rosie O'Donnell sing the "Oscar Mayer" song.
Is Geraldo Rivera Fox News' senor correspondent?
Are the ads during Red Eye for cool and hip night owls, or for Greg's mom?
When I get into a moral quandary, I ask myself; What would Todd Marinovich do?
Maybe the second amendment is okay... but really it was for muzzle loading black powder weapons. Allow everyone to have those, ban everything else. You might get one shot off, but the reload time will allow people to do something about that.
I guess Don Imus and Anna Nicole Smith really are not very important after all.
Dr Phil also blames video games for his baldness.
