Joe Fresh's blog: "THE MOOD I AM IN"

Type of Love PT 2 I want that type of love That you dominate my day I want to give you everything and hope that you will stay I can focus on my job and things that come my way Wishing that I could see you at the end of work each day Sometimes I find myself speechless, I don't know just what to say Your thoughts are my thoughts, Your dreams are my dreams We are together mentally it seems We knew it from the start, When we first met heart to heart, Mind to mind, heartbreak to heartbreak, Our tears flowed from the same river That was the wonderful start, you gave me your heart and I gave you mine, We will be together in due time then we will find out how strong we are together, how right we are for each other, but only time will tell, if we have more to pull from the well. Picture me standing outside your door Not stalking you But just wondering you Wondering how you smell, Wondering how you feel, Wondering what's inside your mind, Always visions of you, Only you on my mind

I wished for a good woman I got a woman good at ignoring me I wished for a loving woman I got a woman who loved only her priorities I wished for a dedicated woman I got a woman who ignored me to finish her work I wished for a passionate woman I got a woman passionate with her job and not me Then I stopped wishing and started looking to move on. Only to find out there are more like her out there. I wished for a good woman I got a woman good at deceiving me I wished for a loving woman I got a woman loving my money I wished for a dedicated woman I got a woman dedicated to my checking account I wished for a passionate woman I got a woman passionate with her climaxes only Then I stopped wishing and looking and built a wall up I hid behind things that were no longer there. Or maybe never ever were there to begin with. I made an excuse so fast; I could have imagined it had been there from day one. I sexed without emotion to hide my pain. I smiled all day to cover up the shame. I lied so good to myself, I started to believe it. I gave up, quit, stewed and wallowed in my pool of pity. I threw pool parties constantly just because, misery loves company. Then I stopped living, dreaming, wanting and Then there you were….. My personal queen. Just in time to reign over my heart, my ego, and my emotions A woman that is as passionate as I am A woman that loves what I do and cares for how I feel. A woman that asks me how my day was and mean it A woman that tries to soothe me from those days A woman that offers her ear and not her advice, ‘cuz sometimes ya just need to vent. A woman so good, the “what if’s” don’t exist in our world The world she built for us A woman so good that she enjoys taking care of those in her life A woman who loves me to distraction A woman who works hard but knows when to leave her work at work A woman who is so in tune with me that a look can send me over the edge.

Who I Am… There once was a time When I was full of rage I didn’t want anyone calling my name Especially with the last name of Page Not until I became of age And knew the real deal behind my name Now I am grown and have no shame I have set the standard in my family For all males under my age To see: I am Joe Page Yes, my father is Joe Page. My son is also Joe Page But collectively we go by different names We are different people But we share the common denominator We are Pages And we will be the greatest for the ages Sr.: He is, was my father He laughed, he lived, and he snored I will miss him he is not here anymore Jr.: which is I stand above all III will know me and know I will not let him fall I will not let him down I will teach him how to be a man I will teach him to stand on his own when needed I am his role model .He will know How to father a child and be a Daddy He, I hope will be better than I am And I have set the bar… The cycle of Page shame stops with me The era begins here. I am Joe Page Jr. @Joe Fresh 2/05

Ok, So CT lets you rip photos and the details of who ripped them are there. I think that is very cool. BUT>>>>>........ I noticed one of my birthday pix were ripped. Now normally I would be happy if ...I am some womans dream, fantasy and or nightmare...lol But a guy ripped it and put it into his folder.. Like it is his member...... no...no...noo get your own member. It is mine , all mine... ok i had to vent.... btw, he didnt even ask....

Well today 11/5/06..she is beside me while I am on CherryTap. We went to Hampton, VA for a marching band contest. She plays the clarinet. she is in the marching band and yesterday i went but didnt bother her but only when she spoke to me , so i wouldnt embarrass her. It worked, we sat on different buses and it was cool. She only talked to me when she needed money. Well i will take one day at a time....lol

TODAY, I WENT TO PICK UP MY DAUGHTER FROM MARCHING BAND PRACTICE. I WENT TO HUG HER AND SHE TURN AND WALKED AWAY. MY HEART................................................................................................... I CANT EXPLAIN. I FEEL LIKE ON THAT ONE EPISODE OF THE SIMPSONS WHEN BART FELL FOR THAT OLDER CHICK PLAYED BY THE CHICK FROM THE ROSEANNE SHOW... OK, I WENT ON A TANGENT..... ANYWAY THAT EPISODE BART TOLD HER HE LIKED HER, SHE SAID SHE DIDNT LIKE HIM. IN HIS MIND AND ON THE SHOW..SHE RIPPED HIS HEART OUT AND TOSSED IT IN THE TRASH..... OK THAT IS HOW I FEEL. WORSE I HAVE HAD RELATIONSHIPS THAT WENT SOUR. I HAVE HAD SOME CHEAT ON ME. BUT SOMEWAY;; SOMEHOW I STOOD BACK UP AND KEPT MY HEAD UP. BUT THIS RIGHT HERE........MY HEART IS SO HEAVY...MY EYES ARE SO BAGGY.... I AM AT A LOST FOR WORDS...... I AM WEAK.VUNERABLE.EXPOSED I AM NOTHING...... MY DAUGHTER MY FIRST BORN MY ONLY DAUGHTER MY BABY GIRL I AM HURT I LIVE FOR MY KIDS I BREATHE FOR MY KIDS I NEVER MISSED A SHOW, A PRACTICE, ANYTHING THEY HAD FOR 14 YEARS STRAIGHT... ALWAYS BEEN THERE JEOPARDIZING MY JOB, MY FAMILY. ANYTHING FOR THEM... AND THIS IS THE THANKS I GET?

TO ALL MY FRIENDS AND FANS..... I DON'T MIND IF YOU RIP THEM AND SEND THEM AROUND IN EMAILS. I AM COMFORTABLE IN MY OUTFIT AND MANHOOD....

CHILDHOOD LOST PT 1 @JOEFRESH 10/21/06 He touched me in places I didn’t know I had He touched me in places I that were only seen by a Dad When I told on him I got beat bad I was left bruised on the outside And ravaged on the inside My inner child had been raped There was nowhere to escape I sat in my room with my dog Looking for answers to what happened and all I was 4; I was too young to know Then as I begin to grow It happened once more This time at 11 and I was bigger But seemed the perfect size for him He touched me in my naughty place As he squeezed my face He told me not to tell All I wanted to do was yell But he knew, no one would believe me Cuz he was the favorite cousin you see Everybody loved Ronnie He was the best cousin ever If I see him His penis I wanna severe 7 years later he struck again This time with my smaller cousins But he wasn’t gonna win. It was 3 of them, he was out numbered This time they got him All my family called me to apologized I turned my head and begin to cry I was 20 by now, I had suppressed it so much I forgot it happened But the pain was still there The pain is still here I write now to ease my pain My pain is the stain which forms this ink

The Final Ride @JOEFRESH 10/19/06 I am grasping for something that isn’t there. It appears to just be a lost moment Or a moment that I want back But I can’t have it It seems to have gone some where Where I have no idea Its just not there anymore Its not here anymore I can’t figure when it happened I can’t imagine that it even happened I told myself I wasn’t going to let it happen But somehow somewhere it happened I fell outta love with you I am sorry I have to go I cannot stay under these conditions Trying to make something out of nothing It’s just gone The emotion meter reads E I know I did love you I know it was very true indeed I know I wanted to keep loving you But what happened? Who is to blame? Where did it go wrong? You shut down You shut me out I cannot open you I cannot love you Under these conditions I gotta get off The ride is over

Undecided Love 10/19 I left not wanting to see you again I left not wanting to hear from you again But I couldn’t keep away I couldn’t resist from picking up the phone It’s your voice It soothes me in so many ways I had to hear from you Its you, all of you I had to touch you once more I had to inhale you I was missing you indeed I bought your favorite Body rinse And took a shower just to make My thoughts think you were with me That I would open my eyes And you would be washing my back And I would turn so you could kiss me on the cheek I miss that I miss those moments I miss you