Fiend Grrl EVILDRAGONs Fiance DARK PRI...'s blog: "The Demon's Lair"

~Kids Today Have It So Easy~ When I was a kid adults used to bore me to tears with their tedious diatribes about how hard things were when they were growing up; what with walking twenty-five miles to school every morning uphill both ways through year snow; carrying their younger siblings on their backs to their one-room schoolhouse where they maintained a straight-A average despite their full-time after-school job at the local textile mill where they worked for 35 cents an hour just to help keep their family from starving to death! And I remember promising myself that when I grew up there was no way in hell I was going to lay a bunch of crap like that on kids about how hard I had it and how easy they've got it! But.... Now that I've reached the ripe old age of twenty-nine +, I can't help but look around and notice the youth of today. You've got it so easy! I mean, compared to my childhood, you live in a Utopia! And I hate to say it but you kids today you don't know how good you've got it! I mean, when I was a kid we didn't have The Internet--we wanted to know something, we had to go to the library and look it up ourselves! And there was no email! We had to actually write somebody a letter--with a pen!--and then you had to walk all the way across the street and put it in the mailbox and it would take like a week to get there! And there were no MP3s or Napsters! You wanted to steal music, you had to go to the record store and shoplift it yourself! Or we had to wait around all day to tape it off the radio and the DJ would usually talk over some part of it and f*ck it all up! You want to hear about hardship? We didn't have fancy sh*t like Call Waiting! If you were on the phone and somebody else called they got a busy signal! And we didn't have fancy Caller ID Boxes either! When the phone rang, you had no idea who it was it could be your boss, your mom, a collections agent, your drug dealer, you didn't know!!! You just had to pick it up and take your chances, mister! And we didn't have any fancy Sony Playstation videogames with high-resolution 3-D graphics! We had the Atari 2600! With games like "Space Invaders" and "Asteroids" and the graphics sucked a$$! Your guy was a little square! You had to use your imagination! And there were no multiple levels or screens, it was just one screen forever! And you could never win, the game just kept getting harder and faster until you died! Just like LIFE! When you went to the movie theater there no such thing as stadium seating! All the seats were the same height! A tall guy sat in front of you, you were screwed! And sure, we had cable television, but back then that was only like 20 channels and there was no onscreen menu! You had to use a little book called a TV Guide to find out what was on! And there was no Cartoon Network! You could only get cartoons on Saturday morning... We had to wait ALL WEEK, you spoiled little bastards! That's exactly what I'm talking about! You kids today have got it too easy. You're spoiled, I swear to God! You guys wouldn't last five minutes back in 1984!

~Before I Was A Mom~ Before I was a Mom I made and ate hot meals. I had unstained clothing. I had quiet conversations on the phone. Before I was a Mom I slept as late as I wanted And never worried about how late I got into bed. I brushed my hair and my teeth everyday. Before I was a Mom I cleaned my house each day. I never tripped over toys or forgot words to lullabies. Before I was a Mom I didn't worry whether or not my plants were poisonous. I never thought about immunizations. Before I was a Mom I had never been puked on Pooped on Spit on Chewed on Peed on Or pinched by tiny fingers Before I was a Mom I had complete control of my mind My thoughts My body And my mind. I slept all night. Before I was a Mom I never held down a screaming child So that doctors could do tests Or give shots. I never looked into teary eyes and cried. I never got gloriously happy over a simple grin. I never sat up late hours at night watching a baby sleep. Before I was a Mom I never held a sleeping baby just because I didn't want to put it down. I never felt my heart break into a million pieces When I couldn't stop the hurt. I never knew that something so small Could affect my life so much. I never knew that I could love someone so much. I never knew I would love being a Mom. Before I was a Mom I didn't know the feeling of having my heart outside my body. I didn't know how special it could feel to feed a hungry baby. I didn't know that bond between a mother and her child. I didn't know that something so small could make me feel so important. Before I was a Mom I had never gotten up in the middle of the night. Every 10 minutes to make sure all was okay I had never known the warmth The joy The love The heartache The wonderment Or the satisfaction of being a Mom. I didn't know I was capable of feeling so much before I was a Mom.

~Female Beefeater brings girl power to the Tower~ By Kate Kelland LONDON (Reuters) - The guardians of Britain's historic Tower of London are enlisting girl power for the first time in their 522-year history. The Tower's Yeoman Warders, commonly known as Beefeaters -- whose ceremonial dress is a distinctive scarlet and gold tunic, white ruff, red stockings and black patent shoes -- have appointed the first female member to their ranks. "There were six candidates -- five were male and she was the only female," spokeswoman Natasha Woollard said. "She was the best candidate for the job." Woollard said the woman, whose name has not yet been made public, was serving in the armed forces and "will join her new colleagues in the Yeoman Body at the Tower of London in summer 2007." The new Beefeater's full job title will be "Yeoman Warder of Her Majesty's Royal Palace and Fortress the Tower of London, and Members of the Sovereign's Body Guard of the Yeoman Guard Extraordinary." Beefeaters, believed to have earned their nickname from their daily ration of meat, date from 1485 when King Henry VII formed a bodyguard. Historically their duty was to guard "the Tower of London and all things within it" -- a role which included the supervision and care of state prisoners. Now there are just 35 of them, plus the Chief Yeoman Warder and Yeoman Gaoler, and one of their main tasks is to give tours to the two million visitors from around the world who come to the Tower each year. They are also responsible for the Tower's ravens -- six coal-black birds which, according to legend, must always reside in the fortress on the banks of the River Thames to ensure the future of the Kingdom of England. The Tower of London was first built in 1078 by William the Conqueror. Its primary functions were as a fortress, royal palace and a prison, but it has served as a place of execution, an armoury, a treasury, a zoo, a mint and -- since 1303 -- the home of the Crown Jewels. To apply to become a Beefeater, candidates must have a minimum of 22 years' service in Britain's armed forces and have earned medals for long service and good conduct.

"Circles, Why Use Them?" (A discourse on the psychology of magick circles by Mel White) They say that the longest journey begins with a single step. So, too, the exploration of Magickal studies begins with a single step. Though the first step in a physical journey is often self-evident, the First Step on a Magickal journey is often not quite so clear. While formally organized groups often have a path of lessons to instruct newcomers, the solitary or isolated student is often left standing in perplexity on this broad plain of knowledge, wondering just where in the heck to begin. And wondering, too, if it's "okay" to start just anywhere. While it's true that studies can begin in a direction that attracts you, the necessary first step must be learning to make psychic shields. There are "Things of the Dark" out there. There are any number of explanations for what these things might be-- ghosts, demons, or simply uncontrolled urges of the subconscious mind. In truth, it doesn't matter what they are. What does matter is that their effect is very real and unless they are put under your control, they will drag you over the borders of sanity into psychosis. You are most vulnerable to them while you're in an "open" trance or meditative state. That's why the wise practitioner always begins by taking steps to define exactly what will be permitted through the portals of their "psychic shields"-- no matter how simple the ritual. And this, in a nutshell, is what "protective magic" is about. There are a number of ways to do this. The most common is to begin by drawing a circle (around a group or yourself) and invoking the one or more protective powers. Generally, this is done by candlelight, in front of an altar that holds certain magical objects. The circle may be further "secured" and "cleared" by using salt, salt water, rum, incense, or some other method. You may be wearing a special robe and will have taken a bath (or performed a cleansing ritual) earlier. The powers that protect you will be called on and then you will begin your ritual. Is it psychological? Absolutely! Is there a reason why protection rituals always take this form? Positively! Let's take a step back and see what you're actually doing and how the process works -- from a psychological standpoint-- and how to use this knowledge to help you refine your circles to enhance your rituals. Psychologists and psychics alike view the mind's structure as a three-part entity: The ego (that which you think of as yourself), the superego (the "higher self") and the Id (the child within). The Id is, in a sense, a computer. Like most computers, it operates on the "garbage in-garbage out" principle. There's an old superstition "as you name something, so will it become." Tell yourself that you're very unlucky and your id will obligingly give you bad days by enhancing any negatives in your environment. Tell yourself that you are clumsy, and your id-computer will obligingly arrange for you to break a leg while stepping off the sidewalk. The bad news is that the Id can't make a judgment as to whether or not this is a good idea. It only knows that it's received these "instructions" and must carry them out. The good news is that you can actually program/reprogram this portion of your mind. You begin programming this Internal Servant of yours by first drawing its attention to what you want done and then explaining what you need done in a simple and clear manner. Repeating the instructions in a chant help fix the goals for the Id-- rhymed chants seem to be easier for it to process. Each time you perform the ritual and repeat the chant, the programming is strengthened. Never mind that your ego and superego understand that you're going to program the child-like Id. It works just the same. To direct the Id's attention to the process, you first have to impress it. Using special tools and clothing alert it that something unusual is going on and that it must pay attention. Acquiring hard-to-obtain items, drawing symbols, performing a symbolic sacrifice (donating money, say, to a good cause) are all ways of reinforcing the Id's impression that this ceremony is very special and that the result will be very powerful. Organized, meaningful symbols, speak to your subconscious mind in ways it understands, reinforcing the goals you have set. Drawing the circle itself establishes boundaries within your environment ("The rest of the world can do what it likes Out There. All within this circle is in MY control!"). Purifying the circle and consecrating it (sprinkling water which has been blessed and salt added) further enforce your territory, defining the borders where you are "safe". Nothing can enter this area except what you invite inside. You further tighten these borders by calling on certain powers. You can call on any powers you like. Some use traditional Christian images. Others call up deities from the religion they are most comfortable with. And many people use the thought/image of a beam of light that represents either God/Goddess (whichever one they like) OR The power of light and life and goodness in the Universe. The number of powers called as guardians varies. You may choose to invoke one powerful being to protect your circle. Or you might call on the Universal Being/Light AND four guardians (one for each quarter of the compass). A third approach is to use a guardian for the four quarters of the compass and no higher being. There is no "absolutely correct" system; the correct system is the one that YOU are comfortable with. Take time to choose the guardians of your circle carefully. You should select guardians (gods or animals or some form of life) which have a deeper meaning to you and whose qualities are in harmony with your goals. For the new student, it's best to have all your Powers and Guardians from the same belief system/religion/mythic universe so that the symbols will be consistent and not confuse the Id. You CAN use people-- saints, movie actors, figures from favorite books as guardians. DO, however, pick someone who's dead or non-existent. The dead can't argue with your interpretation of them, whereas the living may be highly offended to be approached as gods/guardians). As your studies continue, you will find that your totems or guardians change. This is to be expected; as you explore new realms in your studies, you may find you need guardians who deal with very specific areas to strengthen and guide you in these new fields. But don't make the mistake of assuming that you'll become so powerful that you will never need the protection of the psychic shielding circle in some form. And don't assume that you will not need a circle for "positive" magick such as healing. Open is open-- and open is vulnerable. And circles strengthen and protect you by defining what psychological influences will be allowed to work with you.

Celtic Dragons and Serpents: Symbols of Earth Energies Dragons and serpents of Celtic Religion symbolized Earth energies, potent forces of the land, which polarized into Positive and Negative roles. The mythical beast usually is represented as a huge,winged, fire-breathing reptile. For centuries the dragon has been prominent in the folklore of many peoples; thus, tis physical characteristics vary greatly and include combinations of numerous animals. The dragon has often been associated with evil. In many legends a dragon had the ablilty to wreak havoc upon the land and therefore had to be either placated with a human sacrifice, or killed; it was also often the guardian of a treasure or a maiden. The highest achievement of a hero in medieval legend was the slaying of the dragon, as in the story of St. George. King Arthur, son of Uther Pendragon (dragon's head), also killed a dragon. The giant red dragon of the Apocalypse (rev.12) gave rise to the use of the beast as smybolic of Satan in Christian art and literature. In ancient China, the dragon was associated with fertility and prosperity. Many of the beliefs connected with the dragon are echoed in snake worship. In esoteric terms, the Red Dragon, Ddraig Goch, represents the Sovereignty of England and is the totem beast of the greatest line of Kings, The Pen-Dragons. The Red Dragon (dragon is ddraig in Welsh) is derived from the Great Red Serpent that once represented the Old Welsh God, Dewi, who later metamorphosed into Wales mythical patron saint, David. There is a legend that Merlin, Druid Wizard and later resident Wiseman of King Arthur's court, was called to help King Vortigern. He was attempting to build a temple (Stonghenge) on Salisbury Plain, but the structure kept falling down. Merlin saw that the problem was that a Red and White Dragon were fighting in a mystical pool beneath the temple's foundations. Stonehenge, a Megalithic Stone Circle dating from the 3rd Millennium, B.C.E., is built on a powerful convergence of earth energy lines (Ley Lines), represented by the two Dragons. Merlin prophesied that Vortigern, the Red Dragon, would be slain by Uther Pendragon, The White Dragon, and so it happened.

BAT - Rebirth Steeped in the mystery of Mesoamerican tribal ritual is the legend of Bat. Akin to the ancient Buddhist belief in reincarnation, in Central America, Bat is the symbol of rebirth. The Bat has for centuries been a treasured medicine of the Aztec, Toltec, Tolucan, and Mayan peoples. Bat embraces the idea of shamanistic death. The ritual death of the healer is steeped in secrets and highly involved initiation rites. Shaman death is the symbolic death of the initiate to the old ways of life and personal identity. The initiation that brings the right to heal and to be called shaman is necessarily preceded by ritual death. Most of these rituals are brutally hard. The basic idea of ancient initiations was to break down all the former notions of "self" that were held by the shaman-to-be. This could entail brutal tests of physical strength and psychic ability, and having every emotional "button" pushed hard. Taunting and spitting on the initiate was common, and taught him or her to endure the duress with humility and fortitude. The final initiation. This ritual is very similar to the night of fear practiced by natives of Turtle Island. In this ritual, the shaman-to-be is sent to a certain location to dig his or her grave and spend the night in the womb of Mother Earth totally alone, with the mouth of the grave covered by a blanket. Darkness, and the sounds of animals prowling, quickly confronts the initiate with his or her familiar. As the darkness of the grave has its place in this ritual, so does the cave of Bat. Hanging upside-down is a symbol for learning to transpose your former self into a newborn being. This is also the position that babies assume when they enter the world from the womb of woman. If Bat has appeared, it symbolizes the need for a ritualistic death of some way of life that no longer suits your new growth pattern. This can mean a time of letting go of old habits, and of assuming the position in life that prepares you for rebirth, or in some cases initiation. In every case, Bat signals rebirth of some part of yourself or the death of old patterns. If you resist your destiny, it can be a long, drawn out, or painful death. The universe is always asking you to grow and become your future. To do so you must die the shaman's death.

The Lady of the Lake (Nimue, Vivien, Vivienne, Niniane) The Lady of the Lake was known by many names. She was most often Nimue (pronounced Nim-oo-ay). Nimue was often confused and misrepresented in Arthurian Legend as an enchantress wanting nothing more than to steal Merlin's magick. This is considered by most, a literary fabrication created by the misogynist, religious state of that time. Literarily, Nimue was the daughter of Diones and the lover of both Pelles and Merlin. In reference to Nimue as the Lady of the Lake, it was she who gave the sword Excalibur to Arthur and regained it when he died. She also accompanied three additional faerie queens to Avalon with the body of the slain king. It is also said that she stole the child Lancelot and cured his madness. This was done so Lancelot could become guard to Nimue's weak son Mabuz who was tormented by Iweret. Alfred, Lord Tennyson paints one of the lovliest literary pictures of the Lady of the Lake in his great work, Idylls of the King. This first reference describes the Lady of the Lake presenting Excalibur to the King. The second reference is the return of the sword after the death of Arthur. "And near him stood the Lady of the Lake Who knows a subtler magic than his own- Clothed in white samite, mystic, wonderful. She gave the King his huge cross-hilted sword, Whereby to drive the heathen out. A mist Of incense curl'd about her, and her face Well nigh was hidden in the minster gloom; But there was heard among the hold hymns A voice as of the waters, for she dwell Down in the deep-calm, whatsoever storms May shake the world- and when the surface rolls, Hath power to walk the waters like our Lord." Spoken by Sir Bedivere who was charged with casting Excalibur to the Lady... "Then with both hands I flung him [Excalibur], wheeling him; But when I look'd again, behold an arm; Clothed in white samite, mystical, wonderful, That caught him by the hilt, and brandish'd him Three times, and drew him under the mere." Mythologically, the Celtic Lady of the Lake was known as a Gwragedd Nnnwn (or Lake Faerie). These fae were often married to mortal men. They were lovely, blonde women who enjoyed female company and aiding mortal women and children. The Lady of the Lake was also considered the Queen of the Isle of Maidens. Nimue, mythologically, was a lessor Celtic Moon Goddess; cognate with the Greek Nemesis and Diana of the Grove. Her name meant "fate" and "she who lives" and was said to reside in the Fairy wood of Broceliande. She was also connected to the Goddess Morgan. Archetypically, Nimue and the Lady of the Lake represented the primal initiation into the Otherworld. She reigned over knowledge, was the foster mother, and the mistress of wisdom.

If the World Were a Village of 100 People If we could reduce the world’s population to a village of precisely 100 people, with all existing human ratios remaining the same, the demographics would look something like this: The village would have 60 Asians, 14 Africans, 12 Europeans, 8 Latin Americans, 5 from the USA and Canada, and 1 from the South Pacific 51 would be male, 49 would be female 82 would be non-white; 18 white 67 would be non-Christian; 33 would be Christian 80 would live in substandard housing 67 would be unable to read 50 would be malnourished and 1 dying of starvation 33 would be without access to a safe water supply 39 would lack access to improved sanitation 24 would not have any electricity (And of the 76 that do have electricity, most would only use it for light at night.) 7 people would have access to the Internet 1 would have a college education 1 would have HIV 2 would be near birth; 1 near death 5 would control 32% of the entire world’s wealth; all 5 would be US citizens 33 would be receiving --and attempting to live on-- only 3% of the income of “the village”

~The Witch Upon the Hill~ Her eyes are black, the midnight sea, Her hair, a sooty cloud Her voice, the winds of fantasy, Her heart like fire, and proud I could not help but watch her As beneath the moon she danced, She whirled, she cast, she conjured She sang a mystic chant She soared into my soul that night The starry sky her wings She whispered secrets in my dreams And spoke of sacred things In my mind, she entranced me Her kiss was magick-laced Her touch, it left me trembling, And craving her embrace The skies obey her every wish, The elements, her commands, She wields a power o'er me, My heart lies in her hands For her I'd cross the universe, For her I'd swim the sea, But what could an Enchantress want with a simple man like me? She came, and said, "I love you, And likely, always will." My heart, I pledge, forevermore To the Witch upon the hill -DUNCAN WALLACE This poem is dedicated to Sarah Osborne Who died in jail on May 10, 1692. Bridget Bishop Who was hanged on June 10, 1692. Sarah Good and her unnamed child The baby died in jail just before its mother was hanged on July 19, 1692. Elizabeth How Susannah Martin Rebecca Nurse Sarah Wildes All of whom were hanged on July 19, 1692. Reverend George Burroughs Martha Carrier George Jacobs John Proctor John Williard All of whom were hanged on August 19, 1692. Ann Foster Who died in jail sometime after September 10, 1692. Giles Corey Who was pressed to death on September 19, 1692. Martha Corey Mary Esty Alice Parker Mary Parker Ann Prudeator Wilmot Reed Margaret Scott Samuel Wardwell All of whom were hanged on September 22, 1692. And to Sarah Dastin Who was pardoned when the madness of 1692 came to an end, but who died in jail all the same, unable to pay her jail fees. May we never forget.

~A Witch's Execution~ It is always the morning of my execution........ I know they will come for me today. Last night the jailor, pulling up his trousers, Sneered, "Perhaps you'll fancy the pole They give you in the morning more than mine, Stubborn Bitch." I think He liked it better when I had strength And spirit enough to fight him. He is too stupid to lie just to torment me. I will welcome death, though the dying scares me... I was a healer -- how long ago? Oh, Gods, I cannot think straight anymore! And I know That their gross insults to my body will never mend. And the pain is constant, and they have sworn me That I will go to the fire conscious and aware. My Goddess, I am sick to my very soul with shame; At the last I gave them screaming what they wanted, Mouthed any obscenity they asked, I told them What they told me to say. My sanity remains Only because Your names go with me to the pyre, And the grave beyond, and only there. Oh, Beloved, if I could only see you One last time, that your clean spirit's fire Could rid me of this filth and fear... The crowd gathers now. I hear them outside, laughing, festive - Gods grant I will be entertaining enough - I wonder if these pious souls who in the past Have asked my help will mourn me? Well, I shall be glad to quit this stinking cell - The rats grow bolder as I decline - Oh, Mother, give me strength! I hear the guards outside. "What," I taunt, "three of you All for one small half-starved wench? Indeed, terrible I must be!" They have the grace to look ashamed, The youngest one grows pale and horrified At the sight of me; I delivered his wife Of a fine strong son not many weeks ago, But now I dare not ask how the child fares. "Nay, you must carry me or drag me, My fine bravos - these ruined feet will never Bear my weight again. I fear I danced too long With your good priest and his fine Spanish boots." They haul me to my feet and the pain - I will not scream again for their amusement! I must go naked, then, to my death before these fools? I would not have them see me so, who danced Naked for the Goddess, graceful and free, On winged feet without a trace of shame. Their avaricious eyes defile me, as their Twisted priests defiled my body's temple... There are many strangers here in the square, Churchmen and villagers from all the country round - I am to be a marvelous, far-felt lesson, I see. They bind me to their stake, too tight, more agony - The splintering pole claws my raw back, My shoulders wrenched and cramping, the rough rope Burning my wrists. My legs will not support me, And I sag in my bonds, and I fill with terror, As a pitcher with muddy water. A priest approaches - Oh, Goddess, must I suffer them even now? The crowd protests the cup in his hands. He exhorts them gently: his sect bears mercy towards all, Malice towards none, and might not even such as I Be saved at the bitter end? I don't know this one. I fight to raise my head, To spit in his face, for one last shred of defiance - Mother of All, no! Not you - here! How have you come, Beloved, To trade your green robes for their black, Your antlered crown for their cross? Surely I dream, I dream... But now I smell your clean scent, And your dear presence cloaks me in peace. Rage fires in your eyes, but your pure love Sustains me, strengthens me and warms me. You brush the hair back from my face - The cup you hold gently to my bruised lips I gave you At our handfasting - softly you whisper, "Drink deep of salvation, my dear love," And your voice, harsh with unshed tears, Rips at my soul and my own tears begin, and fully Do I drink of your deep eyes and the chalice, And the taste of the flying herbs burst upon my tongue, Belladonna, aconite, dark sweet dreams... They are coming now with the fire. Almost you linger too long, haunted eyes on mine, But as sleep steals over me I see you melt Safely into the throng. I am drifting now; I hear my mother singing, far away - Strange, she has been dead these many years - The pain is gone. I am a little girl again - I am safe, My mother is calling me and I run gladly into her arms... But in the room I have left behind, someone has been careless With the supper, Mother, they must turn the spit faster, For I can smell the roasting meat burning, And the dinner guests are shouting... I wake in a cold sweat, and cannot drink From the glass you bring me. Oh, sisters, hear: Our daughters must not dream these dreams! We must defend ourselves, stand with our brothers, And make the arsonists let us be. Oh, sisters, hear: Never again, Never again the burning.