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BEANER AKA MYSTO WC's blog: "release me"

created on 10/08/2007  |  http://fubar.com/release-me/b139151

love?

So it's early in the morning and sleep has evaded me once again. So left with nothing better to do with my restless mind, I write. I wonder is there a person for us all? Or is that what people say because they have hope? Maybe, just maybe we search in vain for "The One". Does that person exsist? Everything seems right. Your love begins to grow and your walls slowly crumble. You trust in things you said you never would, your vulnerable. In their arms you feel safe and warm. They have a kiss that takes your breath away. You admire their strength and lift up their weakness, because to see them fall would hurt you as well. So tell me then how does this all change? Maybe our expectations are too high? But aren't we raised to hold them high? Never settle for less is what I've been told. So where exactly did I go wrong? Selfish lies, and sinful pleasures. Most are guilty of both... But to determine the way we love is ultimately our choice. Honesty and tenderness is not as hard as we tend to make it. My goal, is to change the way I love in hopes to be loved back the same... So I say to my friends, love the way you wish to be loved or don't do it at all....If love is not a need then be honest. Dont give false hope to a heart that may not be able to take one more break.?

me to you

sitting alone in my room all i hear is your voice not a day goes by that i think of you my needs for you grow stronger and stronger hour by hour and day by day deep withing my soul it tells me how much i need you as the voices whisper your name from within i throw my hands up to the voices my arms bleeding from the obsession and needs which came from your blade. a blizzard of doubts come before me to take me on a challenge i wish to say your name to fight it all but for now all i can do is let the blood from my obsessions and needs spell it out for me. this from which i speak is only true I wish to release myself and journey to find your soul

release me

at the age of 28...nothing has been that great if there is a lord...well i am ready for my fate. all of a sudden I come to awake still i am locked in my dark room. nothing around. just abandonment all around. i run to the door and all i can hear is "let him out" nothing occurs...just the same mind tricks that run all over me. if there was a window i would jump. in front of me appears a mirror. I am disgusted as to what i see...i see me quickly I smash it with my fist. at first there is no pain...and then pleasure occurs to me. what is built up inside shall never come undone. why do you play tricks on me!!!! i yell. why is this path choosen for me. if you have the key to release me... will you use it..or keep me locked up?
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