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http://www.greatinventions.tv/products/101.php that is the site that i came across and well can't copy and paste the whole think...LOL but let me tell you my thoughts were WHO WOULD REALLY TRY THIS...LMFAO CHECK IT OUT AND DON'T FORGET TO READ ALL THE INSTRUCTIONS...LOL
Dear Wife,
I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you for good. I've been a good man to you for seven years and I have nothing to show for it. These last two weeks have been hell. Your boss called to tell me that you had quit your job today and that was the last straw.
Last week, you came home and didn't even notice that I had gotten a new hair cut, cooked your favorite meal, and even wore a brand new pair of silk boxers later that night.
You came home, nibbled at your food for two minutes, and went straight to sleep after watching all of your soaps. You don't tell me you love me anymore, you don't want sex anymore or anything. Either you're cheating on me or you don't love me. Whichever is the case,,,,I'm gone.
Signed,
Your EX-Husband
P.S. Don't try to find me. Your sister and I are moving away to West Virginia together. Have a great life!
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Dear Ex-Husband,
Nothing has made my day more enjoyable than receiving your letter. It's true that you and I have been married for seven years, although a 'good man' is a far cry from what you've been. I watch my soaps so much because they drown out your constant whining and griping. It's just too bad it doesn't work.
Yes, I did notice when you got a hair cut last week,,,and actually the first thing that came to my mind was "You look just like a girl",,, but my mother raised me not to say anything at all if you can't say anything nice. And when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with my SISTER, because I stopped eating pork seven years ago.
I turned away from you when you had those new silk boxers on because the price tag was still on them. I prayed that it was just a coincidence that my sister had just borrowed fifty dollars from me that morning and your silk boxers were $49.99...
After all of this, I still loved you and felt that we could work it out. So when I discovered that I had hit the lotto for twenty million dollars, I quit my job and bought us two tickets to Hawaii. But when I got home you were gone. Everything happens for a reason I guess. I hope you have the fulfilling life you've always wanted.
My lawyer said with the letter that you wrote, you won't get a dime from me. So take care.
Signed: Rich As Hell and Freeeeeeeeeeee!
P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this but my sister 'Carla',,,was born Carl. I hope that's not a problem for you...
l don't care what people say and think
you like me or you don't...
everyone has an opinion
just because they give you one
doesn't mean you have to take it
do one thing everyday that scares you
don't have regrets
they are all learning experiences
that has brought you to the person you are today
sometimes doing the right thing
you do it completly alone
Sometimes doing the right thing
is not really doing the right thing
read all instructions and directions
even if you don't follow them
being open minded is being able to put yourself in someone else's shoes
To error is human
no one is perfect
rome wasnt built in a day
God din't even do it in one...lol
Don't depend upon anyone
you can do it your self
at least then you know it will be done right
all good things come to those who wait
don't settle for just anything
Don't like your life
Change it
You are the only one who can change it
can't help someone who doesn't want to be helped...
Can't make someone love you
can't make someone stay with you
can't help people that don't want to be helped
the more you push in a relationship the more you push them away
can't make someone do the right thing
you can't please everyone
so be content in pleasing yourself...
always be prepared
don't make promises you can not keep
be careful what you wish for
if you go looking for trouble you will find it
a mind is a terrible thing to waste
you see the light at the end of the tunnell and then it is gone, really???
that is life...LOL
i wake up in the morning waiting for the shit to hit the fan something is bound to go wrong....
if you owe $50.00 you are a deliquent account
if you owe 50,000 You are a small business
if you owe 50 million you are a corporation
if you owe 50 billion you are the government
if you can keep your head when everyone else is losing theirs you are probably the executioner
the only ones who truly fail are the ones who don't try
never put off things for tomorrow what you can do today
it is not over till it is over
inpossible is nothing
believe nothing of what you hear
and only half of what you see
Three Guys died and went to heaven. St Peter stopped them at the gate and said tell me how you died and the innocent one gets to enter...
the first guy said I came home early from work one day to catch my wife cause i just knew she was cheating... i came into the apartment and found her in the kitchen. she was alone so i searched the apartment and found no one... i came back to the kitchen to find hands gripped onto the window seal so i stomped on them... the guy fell 20 feet and bounced off the canapy and lived... the looked up at me and waved,,, so i picked up the small fridge and threw it down upon him.. In the middle of all this i died from a heartattack...
the second guy said... I was washing windows one day when the rope broke, i grabbed onto a window seal to keep from falling and some guy stompted on my hands i fell 20 feet praying to live... i bounced off the canapy and lived and raised my hands in praise... I was alive... but the same crazy guy threw down a fridge and it killed me...
the third guy said... I WAS THE ONE HIDING IN THE FRIDGE...
hope you enjoy
A student at Eagle Rock Junior High won first prize at the Greater Idaho Falls Science Fair, April 26. He was attempting to show how conditioned we have become to alarmists practicing junk science and spreading fear of everything in our environment. In his project he urged people to sign a petition demanding strict control or total elimination of the chemical "dihydrogen monoxide."
And for plenty of good reasons, since:
He asked 50 people if they supported a ban of the chemical.
The title of his prize winning project was, "How Gullible Are We?"
He feels the conclusion is obvious.
again i stumbled upon this and it is something..lol
