Blow Pop's blog: "poetry"

I wish I knew what I could do I want to be yours But times like this when she is here I don't feel like I am yours. Last night I didn't either. All I wanted was to curl around your legs for comfort And so I could get some sleep. But I guess I can ever forget that when she's here I had these horrible nightmares all night and they wouldn't stop I was so scared And you were nowhere around. You don't even seem to care if I do anything right now. The only thing you care about is if I'm driving with my knife. Well guess what I'm gonna I'm feeling dangerous right now. Theres nothing you can do. I don't see any real purpose anymore to living Its not worth the heartache day in and day out I wish there was an off button That I could turn these feelings off And just not care anymore Maybe it would help. This is my cry for help But I don't think anyone's listening anymore. Nov. 1, 2008 April Marie "My heart is yours to fill or burst, To break or bury, Or wear as jewelry. Whichever you prefer." "I'm afraid your kiss might kill me, so won't you kill me" -Dashboard Confessional

My blood is my sadness and so I am filled, your breath is my pain and so I am consumed. Did you ever think that maybe I can't be who you need? God knows you can't be for me. But please don't take that wrong, for your words I suspect, create the boundaries of my world. How I hate when I lose, and I lose even when I win. And maybe you just don't care, and maybe I should just shut up. But should you ever decide to leave, finding my inconsistencies maddening, you must leave knowing this: I'm the best contradiction you'll ever meet.

If I am to burn in hell then let me wear your kisses well. If my soul will find no rest, then let your kisses burn my flesh. A hundred and a thousand score, one parting kiss I do implore. A final gift from you to me, to wear into eternity. 5/27/2004

Tears of pain and lust Stain the color of his eyes A choked reply I don't want to hurt you To the question unasked Burden my heart? We both have other Great loves Friends we will always be A shared night of intimate torture Colors burst forth Green and yellow merge The want of another In future days to come And strengthen our bond This outflow of essense The bite of your teeth The lick of your tongue The taste of life Is a friend's love. 5/4/2004

I am not very tiny, I am not very slim, I haven't flowing tresses, and I am not long of limb I haven't deep and sexy sounds, coming from my voice, and too from time to time perhaps, my lips are dry, not moist. My skin has many freckles, it's not peaches and cream, and so, I know, it's not the type of what most men would dream I have two eyes of shimmering blue, though they are not set deep, but just the same when I am hurt, it causes them to weep. I don't have secret hiddn charms to lure you into a web, nor fancy culinary foods with which I could have fed. I'm not the type of woman that it is men will desire, and I'll never be the kind of one who sets their souls on fire. What I am is loving, kind and patient, to the core, but sadly it is not enough, you needed so much more. This face won't launch a thousand ships, but still I like to smile, and many smiles you gave me, when you let me dream awhile. May 28, 2004

Abandoned the need for love, a need that was exploited and twisted and turned to something foul the tourtured last moment of life that should have been the ending but was the beginning of the diakka. *Authors note: Diakka = evil spirit/a spirit in general mostly evil though (gypsy language)

Harsh words, violent blows hidden secrets, no one knows eyes are open, hands are fisted deep inside, I'm warped and twisted. On my knees, alive but dead look at the invisible blood I've bled I'm not gone my mind's just drifted don't expect much, I'm warped and twisted Born out, wasted, empty, and hallow Today is yesterday's tomorrow The sun died out the ashes sifted I'm still here, warped and twisted.

Two people, Two Different Worlds. 1 person lives with her family and hates it and wishes she could live with her boyfriend. The other also lives with his family And occasionally likes it, but just not all the time. She hates it when her family takes Her stuff and her privileges away and When they snoop through all her Stuff. She doesn't know why they do., but maybe its because they want to see what is going on in her personal life, but she doesn't want them to. Or maybe it's because they think she is on drugs or something. Whatever the reason she thinks that they need to stay out of her diaries and stuff and stop suspecting her of stuff. They are two people, in two different worlds.

It takes a minute to have a crush on someone, an hour to like someone, a day to love someone, but it takes a lifetime to forget someone. For you see everyone hears you, friends hear what you say, and best friends only hear what you don't say. Because a friend is forever and a freindship is a lifetime. So don't ever forget that. I guess what I am trying to say is that a girlfriend is not only your confidant but also your best friend and deserves all the respect and dedication that you would give your best friend. I don't know why I'm even being nice enough to tell you that poem and wast the ink in my pen and printer. I guess what I am trying to say to you is don't play your girls around like that and be all like you are.