so this is about my first time, the lose of my innocents and the beginning of a new me. the me that no one wanted to see until now or accept was going to me. Only a few choice people know of my decision to lose my innocents. I walk into the room with my two best friends with me. I refused to go at this alone, I needed and wanted their support. The guy is a pro at this, in fact i was told he's the one i wanted to do this, to steal my innocents and change my life forever. His name is Danny. he tells to me to have a seat in the chair, he talks to me and my girls for a few making sure i really wanna do this b/c there is no going back once he starts. I assure him that i want to do this and i want to be the one to change me forever. So he then tells me to bend over the arm rest in front of me and warns me not to jump b/c it will only make things hurt worse. i tell him i understand and i tell my best friend thats in front of me to hold my hand, in case i need to squeeze something due to the pain i was about to indure. At first he just touches me lightly get ready to do his dastardly deed that i've asked for. then he begins to poke me, at first i stop breathing for a min and my girl is like you gotta breath. She says look at me talk to me. I'm like about what, how can i possible talk and not think about this pain i'm in. she looks me in the eyes and begins to talk to me, it works, i dont feel the pain so much anymore. occasionally i tense up but only when he stops for a min and then starts again without warning. Danny asks me several times if i'm okay or if i need to stop for a min. I say i'm fine and if i stop now he'll never get to finish b/c i was not coming back in that room if i left. so he keeps on with his way of stealing so many people's innocents. Amazingly though i havent cried like i thought i would. my other friend is sitting behind me watching everything going on and say i'm doing fine. after about an hour we take a smoke break b/c i'm shaking like a leaf and he's done with the first half of his deed. There's some blood trickingly down from the area, but its okay it was expected. after smoking for a min we go back so the deed can be finished. Once again i sit in the chair and bend over the arm rest in front of me. this time i tell my girls that i should be okay, i'm actually feeling a little numb but i still need them there to talk to me while Danny finishes his job. It takes him another hour to finish but my girls never leave me and never let me be in pain alone. When he finished he says well nicole baby you did good and your all done. i stand up, smile at him, say think you, hand him his $200 and walk over to a mirror to see my FIRST tattoo. now go to my pics and see it for yourself, let me know what you think.
