kashi shani's blog: "LOVE TO WRITE"

Saranghi Teamo Mahal Love 
 
Love that i never feel but i know i have it on my heart.
 i scared not for my self but for my daughter bcoz i feel that im dying i dont know when. kashi was sick but i fight and i'll pray that not now im not ready may be some day if my daughter become a successful woman that she can live with out me.
 i here again even my english not good trying to write again.i hate being alone,staying at home bcoz i always thinking in my life.
i was from the broken family my mom and dad was separated but no third party,i have 6 bro and i am the only daughter of the family, but i never feel that i am important or special to my family.like when i was got pregnat my family was so mad at me bcoz the only daughter of the family have a daughter but never got married no bf,no lover no man in life.now i am alone ohhhhhhhhh im wrong i have a daughter now,but shes so young shes only 13yrs old.
before i love.to the man that i think he's my forever but im wrong he cheat me not only ones but several times.its so hurt from me bcoz he's the only man i love he's the first man in my life and i think he also the last.Goshhhhhhhhhhh Kashi was getting  crazy
i wish i am rich i buy what i want and what i need and i give a better life to my Ella.

BUT IM STILL HOPING THAT SOMEDAY BEFORE I DIE  SOMEDAY  SOMEONE  COME IN MY LIFE TO SHARE HE'S LIFE TO ME.A MAN THAT ACCEPT ME WHAT AND WHO I AM THAT CAN AFRAID TO HURT AND SEE ME TO CRY.

ITS KASHI REAL LIFE 

i so woried about him, i meet him on fubar, a great friend, a great man a great dad a great person i meet...now he gone i dont know what happen to him, i try to find him i need to know what happen to him.....i cant find him on fubar now, i try to send message to his skype, but no respond, i never saw him again to online in skype,i try to send a message to whatsapp, still i cant find him, i try to call to his number but his number is out of reach....i try to post a mumm may be some fu members know him in real life... but still i cant find him..now im here hope someone can read my blog and know SCODMAN his funame.

Scodman from   galway, Ireland, Ireland, Republic, if any one from that place and know him in real life hope he/she give a message to him that i try to find him and so many ways bcoz im so worried to him

thanks to all

hope some one can help me to find my great friend

kashi 

for several yrs i leve alone,until i meet a man that i love more thatn my self,my first and last bf,the dad of my daughter, dahil sa kahirapan ng buhay,he need to work in abroad until he dont come back....life must go on,i need to work i need to earn money for me and for my daughter....that time i miss my family,i'l always said if my parents with me may be,may mapag sasabihan ako ng nararamdaman ko.but sad im shy im afarid to tell to my family for what happen to me....just what i said life must go on..
i meet a lot of people in real life true internet i meet a scamer,a fake peole a bad person,but i meet also a true friend..na nakaka unawa saa akin,until my fb friend told me come join in fubar,i told him i dont know fubar,he give me a link and i make a fubar account.i meet again a new friend,sometimes i flirt,i fall inlove and i think he love me also,but sad im not a right girl for him,i accept it to my life,until 1 person told me dont cry be strong,dont allow any one to hurt you to make you cry fight for your life fight for your daughter....im shock for what he said to me....and i replay to his message"thanks Sir! he told me dont call Sir call me Daddy" He is a sweet,caring loving daddy,he treat me like a real daughter,i treat him also like my real father...
my life make happy bcoz even im so far to my real family i have a Daddy that i found true internet,even i cant meet him in real life i meet him true web cam,if im sad tired cry,he always with me, one time he told me i meet someone baby i think she s a goor girl...i told him ohh my sweet daddy fall inlove go go go sweet daddy and its not late to give me a baby siter,he said your bad bad girl.and he smile...smile that i know he happy...im happy for him but im jealous bcoz i think he forget me,he dont talk to me over a week...wen he online he respond my message sorry my bad bad girl im in hospital,my legs is  broke,but you know wen im n hospital i dream that you're with me and you taking care to me...wen i read his message to me i cry...and i hate my self bcoz im thinking wrong to him.....
all his plan in his life he share to me...until one time he said my bad bad girl im going to move in florida,may be we cant talk always bcoz its dont have a net to my pace,but wen i fixed it we talk again like before,im so sad that time but i understand....wen he travel going to florida he said im here in virginia now in m tired to travel,tomorrow im going to florida,on the next day he said im here in florida i stay in hotel.baby and he share some pic to me the place that he buy in florida,and he said baby im near to my Son now..i told him im happy for you sweet daddy....and he said thanks baby for coming to my life this is my last day in hotel and tomorrow im going to my new home....wen he move to his new home saturday night we caht he ask me how i am,i told him im good,he said great baby,always remember daddy loves you,and dont allow any one hurt you,make you cry be strong fight for your life and for your daughter,i told him yes Daddy you know that im good girl,only to you im bad...and he said baby im so tired and feel not good,ohh my poor daddy you need to sleep and rest,we talk tomorrow..ok baby im going to sleep be a good girl daddy going to sleep bye and i love you baby

i dont know that is the last time i talk to him...bcoz at monday night im shock someone said he pass away at sunday in the morning..i cant accept it to my self...i send him a message i told him sweet daddy if its a big joke i dont like...plss tell me its only a joke, but someone said its true..and she give me a prove....i cry cry cry its hard to me to accept it,to my life im here again im hurt again.... i always ask to God why why why my sweet daddy???? why all the people who love me was gone,why im always hurt,i feel that i dont have a right to be happy.

but i wish he come and visit me even in my dreams i want to hug him and i want to say thanks and i love you Daddy....

 R.I.P Daddy meet my sweet Daddy in Heaven love you both!!!!