I laid someone very close to me to rest recently. I'd like to think I knew that friend better than anyone else, yet, to be truthful no one ever really knew him. He grew up fast and he grew up hard, yet the heart that beat within was a heart full of Love and Compassion. He was raised as a street wise kid. He had no parents and his foster families couldn't have cared less whether he lived or died. As a young teen everyone younger and older came to him for advise and he always listened and gave them his heart in return. He kept emotions deep within his soul, never showing fear or shedding a tear. He was thought to be invincible by those who knew him and those who didn't know him were intimidated by his ways. He once stood as a tall, powerful man, but I knew the real man inside, the man who wept over a hurt animal, cried for a lost friend, defended those in need and most of all, gave his all for those around him. In truth that giant, intimidating giant was nothing more than a cuddling, lovable teddybear. Though he was liked and admired by most everyone, he was lonely and sad. He could have anything he wanted because he brought himself up with high morals, pride, and love. He worked a lot, Lord he was a workaholic. He never gave to himself, but gave himself completely to all. He was a man, alone. I have the highest respect for my friend, but I must confess, I won't miss him. He's laid aside his mysterious secret life that he had lived all his life. The past is slowly being burried...
You ask how can I not miss such a friend?
You ask how can I turn my back and not look back?
Yes, I've laid to rest the man who had it all. You see, he had nothing at all really. No one to tuck him in as a child, no one to take care of him whe he was sick, no one to write him letters when went to war, no one to love him when he shed a tear. His happieness was doing for others, not for himself. Yes he had married and found love did not exist except for the love from his children, sadly even they marked him as invincible.
Now a war he fought 35 years ago has taken what was the only thing he possessed, his life.... He served his purpose to his fellow man, he asked nothing in return and he got nothing.
He died May 15, 2007 and piece by piece he's been laid to rest, and his ghosts will be laid with him. His soul will be set free to seek out what life had never given him.
I'll answer your questions and put your mind to rest.
How can I not miss such a man as my friend? His life was empty and lonely, a living hell for him.
How can I not look back? Why look back at heartache and pain, and keep such a life alive?
You see, I've laid that man to rest, and by doing so I've let that man truely begin to live. He's free now to seek out love and happieness, and I might add he's found them both!
What's that you say? OH I see, your confused, Let me explain. I said I'd laid him to rest, not that he had died. You see, The man of the past will live on in history books and training programs and in the minds of those who knew him, but his soul no longer must suffer that life he lived.
He's found happieness and has learned to smile....
He's found love and has learned to live....
No more secrecy must he keep. But he can share all with the ones he loves. No more betrayal must he face, for true love has taken it's place. No more tears must he shed, for the dying and the dead. No more heartaches must he endure, for he can live life and be sure. Though his loved ones know not his true past, There is a love that will always last. No more life will he live where all is sad, He'll be a family man and a proud dad. He'll no longer have to carry a gun, He'll enjoy life and enjoy life's fun. No longer will his life be filled with strife, For he's taking his love and making her his wife.
How can I be so precise as I tell it to you?
I say this because for the rest of his life he will be free, and I know it's true because That Man Once Was ME.......
Written for MY ONE TRUE LOVE,MARY (FORSAKEN BITCH)
