1: On SEARS hair dryer: Do not use while sleeping.
(well thats a givin.. but you know some people will do this just to save time)
2: On a bag of FRITOS: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(so does this mean we can open the bag up inside the store without paying for them?)
3: On a bar of DIAL soap: Directions: Use like regular soap.
( and how would regular soap be used? and what is irregular soap??)
4: Some SWANSON frozen dinners: Serving suggestion: Defrost.
(no shit ... i will just eat it frozen.. duhh)
5: On a hotel-provided shower cap in a box: Fits one head.
(so whos head does it fit??)
6:On TESCO's Tiramisu desert: Do not turn upside down. (Printed on the bottom of the box.)
(thats to stupid t0 comment on)
7: On MARKS & SPENCER Bread Pudding: Product will be hot after heating
(No kidding .. if you had ya ass in oven you'd be hot to)
8: On packaging for a ROWENTA Iron: Do not iron clothes on body
(what if we are in a hurry?)
9: On BOOT's Children's Cough Medicine Do not drive car or operate machinery
(like im gonna let my kid drive my bulldozer around)
10: On NYTOL (a sleep aid): Warning: may cause drowsiness
(isnt that the fucking point)
11: On a Korean kitchen knife: Warning keep out of children
(wonder what those rice dicks were thinking when they put that on)
12: On a string of Chinese-made Christmas lights: For indoor or outdoor use only.
(think we drank to much saki that day?)
13: On a Japanese food processor: Not to be used for the other use
(not even gonna go there)
14: On SAINSBURY's Peanuts Warning: contains nuts
( you mean they are real nuts?)
15: On an UNITED AIRLINES packet of nuts: Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
(this had to be a rocket scientist who wrote this)
16: On a Swedish chain saw: Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.
(only if ya wanna cut ya hands off ..... what a stupid ass)
