i'm craving the days where we'd awaken to fallen leaves
exposing our secrets to one another,
with no worry about the shame or guilt felt
because you had always said i could share anything with you,
the way we could relate, a bond we had made, i felt so safe
you were never one to judge, but was this only a dream?
the season has changed, my body is smothered by misshaped snowflakes
our mouths are kept shut, we lock away three words
you're finding it challenging to make a simple call
and you can't even be here to lift me up, help me stand
when it's such a struggle for me to even get out of bed
brain races, constant lapses, blank map, lost and off trail
my only single concrete thought is of you
you keep me sane for a little while
a sweet voice has buried itself inside my head
only to be interferred by those white pills,
the one's kept away in a tiny gift box, they mute your lies
because lately it's my only solution,
the only way to make this pain dissolve
dissolve into a dream, a memory,
just an emotion written down in an old journal entry
i can't even open up to you anymore
without the fear of you going off
and whispering my secrets into her ear
you broke that bond we once held together so strongly
it's quite hard to understand how this has happened,
it seems impossible,
how could i have fallen in this deep and sorrowful hole?
why did i let you in so close?
i've taken hit after hit,
your bruises lay hidden deep underneath my skin
i guess i never made an effort in avoiding trouble
now i'm locked up where i shouldn't be,
i'm trying my best to hide from everything,
i escape reality with drops of poison
and i can't believe i once felt guilty,
you made such a big deal out of everything i do
look at yourself and keep all of your hypocrisy
do your lies haunt you at night?
how can you carry your heavy conscious?
mine was freed, i can no longer feel grief,
for some selfish act i once performed behind your back
your lies will unfold eventually,
like a long velvet carpet, for everyone to see
why can't you confront the emotions you've provoked?
sometimes i feel sorry for your stupidity
the lack of refinement in your little schemes
you contradict yourself and your lies come clean
but you lie to cover lies
you struggle to find some reason why you do it
it's pathetic to watch you go, as you make up excuses for your lack of morals
maybe you should think of some other lie to keep me satisfied
but it's not going to work this time, i'm fed up
whether they are black or white, they burn just as bad
i don't need you to cover up your mistakes and wrap them up
into a sugar coated taste, easy to swallow in the pit of my stomach,
i know it's shit, so don't try to give it to me, you know it makes me sick
i know you find it hard to believe that you could be the cause
behind the many days spent with a headache and an unstable stomach
when there's so many other possible reasons behind the vomiting
and even though they might all be valid
deep down inside i know you caused them
so i'm done with you, i can no longer be friends with a liar
