HooLeeO's blog: "Some One Liners:"

We had to have the garage door repaired. The Sears repairman told us that one of our problems was that we did not have a 'large' enough motor on the  opener. I thought for a minute, and said that we had the largest one Sears made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower. He shook his head and said, 'Lady, you need a  1/4 horsepower.' I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4. He said, 'NO, it's  not.' Four is larger than two..        

We  haven't used Sears repair since.

  IDIOT  SIGHTING: 

 
 My  daughter and I went through the McDonald's take-out window and I gave the clerk  a $5 bill. Our total was $4.25, so I also handed her a quarter. She said, 'you  gave me too much money.' I said, 'Yes I  know,  but this way you can just give me a dollar bill back.  She sighed and went  to get the manager who asked me to repeat my request. I did so, and he handed me  back the quarter, and said 'We're sorry but we could not do that kind of  thing.' The clerk then proceeded to give me back $1 and 75 cents in  change..   
    
Do  not confuse the clerks at McDonald's. 
    
IDIOT  SIGHTING  : 
I live in a semi rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the local  township administrative office to request the removal of the DEER CROSSING sign  on our road. The reason: 'Too many deer are being hit by cars out here!'   I  don't  think this is a good place for  them to be crossing anymore.' 

From  Kingman  ,  KS  ..   


  
IDIOT  SIGHTING IN FOOD SERVICE  :
My daughter went to a local Taco  Bell  and ordered a taco. She asked the  person behind the counter for 'minimal lettuce.' He said he was sorry, but they  only had iceberg lettuce.. 
  From  Kansas City    


  
IDIOT  SIGHTING: 
I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee  asked, 'Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?' To which I replied, 'If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?' He smiled  knowingly and nodded, 
   'That's why we ask.'

Happened in  Birmingham  ,   Ala.    


  
IDIOT  SIGHTING  : 
The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it's safe to cross the street. I was  crossing with an intellectually challenged coworker of mine. She asked if I knew  what the buzzer was for.. I explained that it signals blind people when the light  is red. Appalled, she responded, 'What on earth are blind people doing  driving?!' 

She  was a probation officer in  Wichita  ,  KS     

    
IDIOT SIGHTING : 
At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear coworker. She was leaving the  company due to 'downsizing.' Our manager commented cheerfully, 'This is fun. We  should do this more often.' Not another word was spoken. We all just looked at  each other with that deer-in-the-headlights stare.

This was a lunch at   Texas  Instruments.     

   
IDIOT SIGHTING :  
I work with an individual who plugged her power strip back into itself and  for the sake of her life, couldn't understand why her system would not turn on.