Aroraa's blog: "hi there"

A lady walked into a Lexus dealership just to browse. Suddenly she spotted the most beautiful car that she had ever Seen and walked over to inspect it. As she bent forward to feel the fine leather upholstery, And unexpected little fart escaped her. Embarrassed, she anxiously looked around to see if Anyone had noticed and hoped a salesperson didn't pop up right now. But, as she turned back, there, standing next to her, is a salesman. With a pleasant smile he greeted her, " Good day, Madame. How may we help you today?" Trying to maintain an air of sophistication and acting as Though nothing had happened, she smiled back and asked, "Sir, what is The price of this lovely vehicle?" Still smiling pleasantly, he replied, "Madame, I'm very sorry to say that if you farted just by touching it, you are Going to shit when you hear the price

>>Recently a man had to go to the hospital to have his wedding ring cut off >>from his penis after his mistress found the ring in his pants >>pocket and got so mad at him she stuck it on him while he was asleep. >> >>Now I don't know what's worse: >> >> 1) Having your mistress find out you're married. >> >> 2) Explaining to your wife how your wedding ring got on your penis. >> >> 3) Or finding out your penis fits through your wedding ring.

The Kitchen Bitch > > > A mother was working in the kitchen listening to her 5-year-old son > playing > with his new electric train in the living room. > > heard the train stop and her son saying, "All of you sons of bitches > who > want off, get the hell off now... cause this is the last stop! > > > And all of you sons of bitches, who are getting on, get your asses on > the > train...because we're going down the tracks. > > > The horrified mother went in and told her son, "We don't use that kind > of > language in this house. Now I want you to go to your room and you are > to > stay there for TWO HOURS. When you come out, you may play with your > train...but I want you to use nice language." > > > Two hours later, the boy came out of the bedroom and resumed playing > with > his train. > > > Soon the train stopped and the mother heard her son say... "All > passengers > please remember your things, thank you and hope your trip w as a > pleasant > one. We hope you will ride with us again soon." > > > She heard her little darling continue..."For those of you just > boarding, > remember, there is no smoking in the train. We hope you will have a > pleasant > and relaxing journey with us today." > > > As the mother began to smile, the child added, 'For those of you who > are > pissed off about the TWO HOUR delay, please see the bitch in the > kitchen."

A man walks into a pharmacy and wanders up and down the aisles. The sales girl notices him and asks him if she can help him. He answers that he is looking for a box of tampons for his wife. She directs him down the correct aisle. A few minutes later, he deposits a huge bag of cotton balls and a ball of string on the counter. She says, confused, "Sir, I thought you were looking for some tampons for your wife?" He answers, " You see, it's like this... yesterday, I sent my wife to the store to get me a carton of cigarettes, and she came back with a tin of tobacco and some rolling papers; because it's soooooooo much cheaper. So, I figure if I have to roll my own... so does she."

woot its my birthday and I am celebrating in detroit. the first time i have left my state in like 8 years. i went to a casino but i lost 20 bucks. at least i can say i went to a casino.

Redneck Man's pick up lines > > > >1) Did you fart? > > > >cuz you blew me away. > > > > > >2) Are yer parents retarded? > > > >cuz ya sure are special. > > > > > >3) My Love fer you is like diarrhea > > > >I can't hold it in. > > > > > >4) Do you have a library card? > > > >cuz I'd like to sign you out. > > > > > >5) Is there a mirror in yer pants? > > > >cuz I can see myself in em. > > > > > >6) If you was a tree and I were a Squirrel, > > > >I'd store my nuts in yer hole. > > > > > >7) You might not be the best lookin girl here, > > > >but beauty's only a light switch away. > > > > > >8) Man - "Fat Penguin!" > >Woman - "WHAT?" > >Man - "I just wanted to say something that would break the ice." > > > > > >9) I know I'm not no Fred Flintstone, > > > >but I bet I can make yer bed-rock. > > > > > >10) I can't find my puppy, can you help me find him? > > > >I think he went inta this cheap motel room. > > > > > >11) Yer eyes are as blue as window cleaner. > > > > > >12) If yer gunna regret this in the mornin, > > > >we kin sleep til afternoon. > > > >and.... the best for last! > > > > > >13) Yer face reminds me of a wrench, > > > >every time I think of it my nuts tighten up. >

Thx to all for the comments and ratings. I am new to this site I have a myspace and a friend hooked me up with this site so I thought I would try it out. I am surprised to see how fast I got respones and friends. Thx again and hope we all keep in touch.