Gizmo's blog: "Trucking"

"GOING OUT WEST"

I road out West with a friend of mine one time. I was "Semi-Retired" at the time and had not drove in a few years but I was driving and needed to get some fuel so I pulled in the Piolt there in Barstow at Lynnwood Rd.. He was asleep and I didn't want to wake him up so I got out of the truck and grabbed that phone and that
O' Gal Said;

"WOULD YOU PLEASE SWIPE YOUR CARD"!

I said now wait a minute. "What the hell would I want to steal my own damm card for"?

''SHE SAID, DO YOU HAVE A HUB"?

I said well hell yes I got a Hub. If I did'nt my damm axles would fall out.

"SHE SAID, DO YOU NEED MILEAGE"?

I said well I've only ran about 1200 miles this week but if you could put a couple thousand on my paycheck it would sure be "Highly Appricated".

"SHE SAID, WHATS YOUR BASE PLATE"?

I said thats that tag on the front of my tractor that tells you what state I am out of.

"SHE SAID, DO YOU NEED A FREE SHOWER"?

I said well I'm completely loaded right now but if you'll sit it out behind the truck stop when I come back through if I have enough room, I'll pick it up.

"SHE SAID, DO YOU NEED REEFER'?

I said "No Thanks". Got Some.

"SHE SAID, DO YOU NEED AN ADVANCE"?

I said well it's been a long time sence a woman has made an advance at me but if you want me to I can make my o'l lady stay in the truck and that way when I come in to pay for my fuel you can show me one of your "Tits" or something.

"SHE SAID, HOW DO YOU PLAN TO PAY"?

I said I don't. I'm a "Drive Off"!

"SHE FINALLY ASKED, DO YOU NEED A TRIP"?

I said, "Bitch" you are a trip. All I wanted to do was get some fuel and you just keep asking me all of these Stupied Questions so I hung up on her, ran out of fuel going down Cojoin, but coasted into the fuel islands at the TA in Ontario!

"WHOOP! WHOOP"!