x HaLo x's blog: "The Madness!!"

So Recently I asked my best friend's lover, (or whatever in the hell you wanna call him at this point), to give me his opinion on Cross Dressing Ewoks. All I Gotta Say Is DAMN!! His Answer was this:

Problems and misconceptions among the Ewok‘s.

An Ewok is not a race, it is a status of age as an adult to a child, a deer to a doe, and a Bear to a cub.
Ewok’s are “cubs” to Wookiees. However unlike most Guardians whom protect their young, the Wookiees send the Ewoks off to another planet all together. Wookiees and Ewoks are both from Kashyyyk but will live out their child hood on the planet Endor. The point of this is similar to that of our own historic Spartans, the weak are discarded at birth. The Wookies, unlike the Spartans, will give them a chance at it by letting nature take it’s course in a life style truly intended as the survival of the fittest. In the event that an Ewok survives to adulthood they are fit to be called a true Wookiee and are removed from the planet and put into action across the galaxy as soldiers. Now becoming a Wookiee is no easy task. According to the documentary entitled “Star Wars Episode VI Return of the Jedi “ you can clearly see that there were not any Wookiees on the planet Endor. Which not only makes Chewbacca a bad ass, this also makes him part of a very rare species. The survival rate of all Ewoks making it past ten years of age is 1 in 3586. Though there is plenty of vegetation on there planet, they still prefer the taste of meat over leaves. This results in cannibalism due to a lack of various species entering there planet. In the event that someone/ something enters their planet these usually gentle creatures can be more then hospitable. If you enter their planet during a feeding frenzy your survival rate would be greater if you were a snowball in hell. Ewoks are scavengers, collecting anything useful they can find from clothing to weapons. Cross dressing Ewoks is a misconception due to the fact that they are A sexual until adulthood. Later in life they will develop there sexual organs, similar to a human hitting puberty. This is a good thing because the last thing we would want on that planet is procreation. So there really is no such thing as a cross dressing Ewok. However there could be cross dressing Wookiees and they are executed due to the fact that you have thrown away the greatest and honorable achievement a Wookiee can make, Surviving Endor to serve your local federation. Like the U.S. Army there is a don’t ask don’t tell policy, the difference is upon finding breaking code you are not discharged you are beheaded and your body will be discarded over Endor for potential Cross dressing Wookiees to snack on