Go, Black!!
I am the terror that flaps in the night...
I am the screeching fingernail on the chalkboard of justice...
I am the sourball in the candyjar of goodness...
I am the grade curve that gives you an 'F'...
I am the fast food that comes back to haunt you...
I am the neurosis that requires a $500 an hour shrink...
I am the special news bulletin that interrupts your favorite show...
I am the wierdo that sits next to you on the bus...
I am the wrong number that wakes you at 3 a.m...
I am the bug that splatters on your winshield...
I am the termite that devours your floorboards....
I am the raspberry seed you can't floss out...
I am the onion that stings in your eye....
I am the hairball that clogs your drains...
I am the low ratings that cancel your program...
I am the auditor that wants to look at your books...
I am the itch you cannot reach...
I am the smoke that smokes Smoked Oysters...
I am the ten dollar service charge on all returned checks...
I am the water balloon that lands right on your head...
I am the widget missing from the easy to assemble swingset...
I am the ingrown toenail on the foot of crime...
I am the zit that forms when you got a really big date...
I am the cholesterol that clogs your arteries...
I am the blown fuse that blacks you out...
I am the repairman who tells you your warranty run out...
I am the weed wacker in the garden of evil...
I am the clock cleaner who will ring your chime (I like this one)...
I am the switch that derails your train...
I am the surprise in your cereal box ( I like this one too)...
I am the chill that runs up your spine (okay, we are officially on a roll now)...
I am the pencil that breaks from signing too many autographs...
I am the single career man all women want to date (corny)...
I am the groundbreaker, down-pounding ground shaker! I am the thunder-maker, underworldly undertaker (Ladies and Gentlemen... we have a winner)!!!
I AM CAPTAIN BLACK!!!