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ASTON MARTIN
Another Strut To Overhaul Nightly - Many Apparent Repairs To Internal Nubs (nubs are wheel bushes).
BENTLEY
Beautiful Engine, Needs To Last Endless Years.
BMW
Break My Windows/Built by Migrant Workers/Big-up My Willy/Bought Mainly by Wankers/Black Man's Wheels/Black Man's Willy/Bring Money in Wheelbarrows/Blew My Wad/Built from Mercedes Wastebasket/Barely Moving and Working/Bersten Mal Wieder (German: 'bust again')/Bei Mercedes Weggeworfen (German: 'made from the parts Mercedes threw away')/Bayerischer MistWagen (German: Bavarian Manure Wagon)/Bayerischer MistWerke (German: Bavarian Manure Works)/Bak Met Wielen (Dutch: 'box with wheels')
BSA
Best Scrap Available.
CHEVROLET
Clatters Heavily, Every Valve Rattles, Oil Leaks Every Time/Cheap Heap Every Valve Rattles Or Leaks Every Time/Can Hear Every Valve Rattling On Long Extended Trips
DODGE
Damned Old Dirty Gas Eater/Dead On Day Guarantee Expires/Dies On Day Guarantee Expires/Drips Oil, Drops Grease Everywhere
FIAT
Found In A Tip/Failure In Automotive Technology/Fix It Again Tony/Fix It Again Tomorrow/Futile (or Feeble) Italian Attempt at Transportation/Fehler In Allen Teilen (German: 'faulty in all parts')/Fur Italiener Achreichende Technologie (German: 'for Italians adequate technology')/Fui Idiota Agora e Tarde (Portuguese: 'I've been stupid now it's too late')
FORD
Found On Roadside, Dead/Found On Rubbish Dump/Fix Or Repair Daily/Fast Only Rolling Downhill/Fix Or Replace Daily/Flip Over, Read Directions/First On Race Day/Full Of Rust and Decay/For Outstanding Reliability and Dependability/Familjen Olssons Rullande Dass (Swedish: 'Family Olssen's Rolling Toilet').
GM
Grinding Metal/Generally Mediocre.
GMC
Garbage Made Carefully/Garage Man's Companion/General Mess of Crap/Gotta Mechanic Coming/Good Mexican Car/Garage Man's Companion.
GTI
God The Insurance.
HOLDEN
Hope Our Luck Doesn't End Now.
HONDA
Hold On Not Done Accelerating/Have One, Never Do it Again/Had One, Never Did Again.
HUMMER
Huge Unnecessary Massive Mobile, Emmissions Ridiculous.
JAGUAR
Just A Gauge Under Another Repair.
JEEP
Just Enough Essential Parts/Just Enough Engine Power/Junk; Each and Every Part/Just Empty Every Pocket.
KIA
Killed In Action/Killed in Automobile.
LADA
Left At Dump Abandoned/Laissee Au Depotoir Abandonee (French: Left At Dump Abandoned)/Langs Achter Duwen Alstublieft (Dutch: 'please push from behind')
LOTUS
Loads Of Trouble, Usually Serious/Leaking Oil To Under Side.
MAZDA
Made At Zoo by Demented Apes.
MOPAR
Mostly Old Parts And Rust/My Old Plymouth (or Pig) Ain't Running/Motor On Pavement After Race/Massively Over-Powered, Always Reliable/Many Old Parts Assembled Recklessly.
MG
Mostly Garaged/Money Gone/Mighty Good.
MGB GT
Musical Gear Box Grinds Teeth.
OLDSMOBILE
Old Ladies Driving Slowly Making Others Behind Increasingly Late Everyday.
PINTO
Powerful Incendiary, Neatly Toasts Occupants.
SUBARU
Still Usable But All Rusted Underneath.
TOYOTA
The One You Ought To Avoid/Too Often Yankees (or Yanks) Overprice This Auto/Taking Our Yen Out Thanks America
