Good Morning and Hello there. Ever had this happen the meddling mother in law syndrome? Well, I will not be stating any good hardcore stories for my own demises however, one Mom thinks her boy is a catch, so much so she shells out 500 bucks for an ad in The Tampa Tribune.
"ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS … a WIFE for my SON," it begins.
Signed Christmas Mother-in Law, the plea continues: "I'm sad that he's alone, a 37 year old handsome Tampa professional …
"Help me find him a wife!"
Prospective brides are asked to contact a post office box in Virginia.
Claudia, the mother-in-law-in-waiting, is a tad concerned about the family's safety. One never knows who might show up at your door, whether you're a good-looking Tampa bachelor or his loving family up in Virginia.
So we're going with no last names for this story.
Claudia swears there's nothing wrong with her son.
"He's such a good boy," she says. "He's so good-hearted, so good-looking. He's got a good job."
So far, so good, but she is his mother. Seeing is believing.
With visions of a daughter-in-law dancing in her head, Claudia agrees to get her son to contact the newspaper for a story. Surely, that will help.
Jason sounds nice and normal over the phone. No criminal record, either. Time to meet. He says to look for the guy with the goatee. Hair color?
"What hair?" he deadpans.
It turns out he's OK with his mother's meddling.
"I figured it was worth a shot," he says.
Jason has been looking for Mrs. Right since 2003, when he got divorced from Mrs. Wrong. There have been a few girlfriends, but "nothing that has panned out." Perhaps it has to do with Mrs. Mother-in Law Wrong…she sounds like she runs the show…Hmmm sounding so much like a TV show coming on soon called Momma’s Boy…Yuck…Good luck prospecting Daughter-in laws.
Another thing that has been going on in Florida is a fetish with Sandwich throwing…Police said a Port St. Lucie man was arrested for throwing a sandwich at his girlfriend, the second food attack that sent a man to jail in about a month. According to a police report released Monday, the 20-year-old man threw the sandwich at his girlfriend's face during an argument about auto insurance and then hit her head with his fist.
The man admitted to throwing the food but not hitting her. He was arrested Friday and faces a battery charge.
Last month, another man was arrested on a battery charge for hitting his girlfriend with a sandwich, knocking her glasses off and nearly causing a traffic crash.
Police reports did not show what type of sandwich was used in either attack. I can see it now, McDonald’s and Burger King hyping whose sandwich is best used in attacking another while in the throws of Orneryism. Yes I spawned a new word Orneryism, it is best used when talking about ones wellbeing…or not so wellbeing… I wonder if McDonald’s will advertise a Two-for…One for eating and two for throwing… No matter…someone will!
And lastly in Florida also…Oh I love picking on Florida…perhaps because I have so many relatives there…PLANT CITY, Fla., Dec. 15 Authorities in central Florida say two men are charged with armed burglary after allegedly demanding only a metal eggbeater from their victim.
The Hillsborough County Sheriff's Office said deputies arrested Robert Eugene Thompson and Taurus Deshane Morris after they allegedly entered a Plant City home -- Thompson allegedly armed with a knife and Morris allegedly with a chrome pistol -- early Sunday and demanded the victim's chrome eggbeater, The Tampa (Fla.) Tribune reported Monday.
Both men were charged with armed burglary and Thompson, who allegedly held his knife to the victim's throat during the scuffle, was also slapped with a count of aggravated assault.
There was no explanation as to why the suspects, who were taken to the Orient Road Jail, were so intent on obtaining only the kitchen utensil. Ok, ok I give what is so dang important about a Chrome Egg Beater? Perhaps they just wanted to make an Omelet… No idea… Well that is it today…I am on weirdo overload…Perhaps the Egg Beater Gang could mix up some Eggnog for all of us since they will not be going anywhere soon this Christmas.
Have a fabulous day
A hug and a pat and out comes the Mistletoe…
Marrtay… and remember I add an extra r and a in my name for just those special occasions.
PS Special question day tomorrow… I am semi letting the cat out of the bag however, I want to give everyone time to think.
What makes Christmas Special, Magical for you…each of us have one glorious memory? Please only the fun ones…we all have many bad memories that we all could thrust upon one another, but this is not the time for bad reflecting only good, please keep that in mind… A special present, a Special love, seeing relatives, Magic in a Childs eyes…put your thinking caps on and please…don’t use the time to make me feel sad for writing this. Not everyone has ions of bad Christmas’s…I know there is a special one that is stored away, share it, and I will share mine…It could be as simple as giving rolls to the needy…smiles do help this time of year let’s keep us all smiling.
