Miss Vanima's blog: "gotta try this again... weight"

Lets start with the menu

Breakfast:

2 slices of whole wheat bread, 1 tbsp of peanut butter, 1 tbsp blueberry jam

Lunch:

Half a piece of lemon chicken, about a cup of brown rice and wild rice, 1 cup green beans, 1 container of yogurt, and 1 banana pecan oatmeal cookie

Dinner: 1 full egg + 1 egg white scrambled, 2 tortillas, 2 oz shredded cheese, and half a cup of salsa.

random munchies: 1 small apple, 10 baby carrots, 18 grapes, 1.5 cups of cheerios (dry), 1 stick of gum

I have been trying to drink the same damn bottle of water since i woke up today.. am about halfway through it. I am not a water person.

ALSO-I went out tonight and had a few drinks: 1 shot soco, 1 red snapper, 1 sprite, 1 oz bacardi dragon berry

TOTALS:

Calories: 1883

Carbs: 280

Fat:34

Protien: 74

not to bad :D

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REFLECTIONS:

Today went pretty well since I was not at work and eating on a time limit... It was a TON of food... I actually had to cut my dinner completely in half because i couldn't eat it all. That is the only reason i was able to drink though... had PLENTY of calories left that i could play with.

I also realized that eating something big in the morning makes me sick the sandwich barely made it down. I think that I am going to see if that changes this week.. and if not just set it as toast and peanut butter or an apple and peanut butter or whatever as breakfast and add an extra snack. We will see how it plays out...

I am not a water person.. i want my coke sooo bad.. i can barely drink this water... i am determined to finish this bottle before i sleep tonight though.

On a more depressing note.. I went to the bar with a couple of friends.. it is ladies night and you get in free plus two free drinks.. a kinda new friend named Cassie was trying really hard to get me to dance. I love to dance.. but not when people are around... she cornered me and asked me why... I told her the truth.. After going out and getting weird looks from people because of my weight and having someone say "oh look at the fat girl dancing"... it is not enjoyable anymore... I was fighting back tears... i know she meant well and i know she just wanted me to have fun like the rest of them.. but it isn't something I can do...

I ended up leaving pretty quickly after that... i still have one of my free drink tickets in my pocket as a matter of fact...

blarg.. oh well i just need more motivation to lose the weight..and maybe that was it..