Damn where to start on this one? Its been 6 years and the pain still hurts as if i lost you yesterday. The nightmare of hearing the horrid fate you faced inside that building when the plane hit drove me insane to the point of going into the army to avenge you. now here i stand feeling it was all for nothing sure we came saw and kicked ass but what good did it do? fact is your still gone and nothing can change that. i should be on top of the world right now got a good paying job a wife that loves me and three beautiful kids but deep inside i feel empty and hollow with the loss of my grandmother this year in june this september is going to be the hardest for me and god forbid october rolling around it will be the one year anniversary of steve's death. what do i do? i look back at all i did and feel i should have done more. who do i talk to about these feelings? which way do i turn it seems everytime someone close to me gets too close they die. then top it off with the past marital problems i have endured and it makes this seem bigger and more overwhelming than it should.