I typed up a pretty awesome thingy on a dating website. I'll just post it here.

INTRO:
Well, here you are. You're on a dating website. The local prospects for romance have let you down. Don't feel bad. Most people are kinda stupid. It leaves us but one choice... the internet. Heck, I'm here. I assume we both came to this site with a common goal... Free pizza!!! (I wish this site would buy me a pizza) Ok, you're here cause your looking for that extra-super-uber-duper-awesome-possum-dude. Me too, except for that dude part.
Well, I'll more than likely message you back. Even if you only can say "hey". I'll admitt that I'm not too fond of the "honky tonk" culture. I won't discriminate against you if you are into it. I just want you to know before reading too far into my profile. I'm not a country boy.
Congrats on your cleavage. Yeah, a lot of you love to show the goods off a bit. It works. Yeah, I'll look . but that's not gonna hold my attention long. I like brains more than boobs. I'm not a one night stand kind of guy, so be sure to have a brain to go with those mamory cannons. Also, most girls have a vagina. If it's your only trait, this won't go far.
Don't be a bxxx... Seriously. You're gonna die one day. Be who you want to be remembered as.


DATING ADVICE:
Don't move too fast in a relationship with me. Just chill out. If it becomes serious, let it do so naturally. If you rush it, it will scare me off. The key word phrase is "Let it work naturally". That's how any relationship should be. Never force it to work. If you really care for someone, but they can't seem to feel the same, perhaps friendship is a better route. It sounds harsh, but it will save you a lot of trouble. In the end, it hurts everyone when you force it to work.

ABOUT ME:
Still interested? Ah, ok. Time to get to know me.
I'm in college. I'm a writer.
I'm a very happy person. I'm playful. I try to see the good in life and I enjoy nature a lot. I'm a bit nerdy. I love to dress up and I'd like halloween to be on every month. I like dressing up classy. I've been known to put on a suit and tie for no reason. My imagination is one of my favorite things about myself. I'm the type of person who loves to see a magic show, and gets angry when someone tries to apply logic to every trick. I'm also a goth. I like graveyards, hearses, dark humor, and necromancers.
I love a good adventure. I want to see the world. I donate time and money to those in need.
I'm currently a land lord. I'm a writer, and I'm working on what I predict to be, a huge hit!
I drink. I only drink socially. When I drink, I drink to get drunk. I get drunk about 1 time a month. I don't do drugs. I have no kids. I want to have a kid some day. I want to be the best dad ever! Before I am a dad, I want to live. I'm in no hurry to tie myself down. I'm not in a hurry to find love, but it be nice to find a partner in crime. Someone who can have fun. Someone who hasn't become too jaded from our moronic society.
I am Happy, nerdy, gothic, child at heart.