19 Ways to annoy your Public Bathroom Stallmate
- Stick your palm up under the stall and ask your neighbor, "May I borrow a highlighter?"
- Say "Uh oh, I knew I shouldn't put my lips on that."
- Cheer and clap loudly every time somebody breaks the silence with a bodily function noise.
- Say "Hmm, I've never seen that color before."
- Drop a marble and say "Oh shit! My glass eye!"
- Say "Damn, this water is cold.
- Grunt and strain real loud for 30 seconds and then drop a cantelope into the toilet bowl from a place 6 to 8 feet high. Sigh relaxingly.
- Say "Now how did that get in there?"
- Say "Humus. Reminds me of humus."
- Fill up a large water bottle with Mountain Dew. Squirt it erratically under the stall walls of your neighbors while yelling "Whoa! Easy boy!"
- Say "Interesting...more sinkers than floaters."
- Using a small squeeze tube, spread peanut butter on a wad of toilet paper and drop it under the stall wall of your neighbor. Then say, "Whoops, could you kick that back over here, please?"
- Say "C'mon Mr. Happy! Don't fall asleep on me!"
- Say "Boy, that sure looks like a maggot."
- Say "Damn, I knew that drain hole was a little too small. Now what am I going to do?"
- Play a well known drum cadence over and over again on your butt cheeks.
- Before you unroll toilet paper, conspicusly lay down your "Cross-Dressers Anonymous" newsletter on the floor visible to the adjacent stall.
- Lower a small mirror underneath the stall wall and adjust it so you can see your neighbor and say "Peek-a-boo!"
- Drop a D-cup bra on the floor under the stall wall and sing "Born Free".
