Spazalicious's blog: ""

so here is a little bit about me. Okay, so it seems like a lot because it is so long. I Live with the philosphy that life is short, so people should live it fully. I Talk sometimes without thinking, sometimes too much, and sometimes before I've listened. I Wish I had millions of dollars to make bigger changes in the world. I Enjoy helping others and making a difference where I can. I Look for the bright side though I sometimes see the dark. I Find enjoyment in simple things. I Smell the roses when given the chance. I Hide my fears more than I should. I Pray that my family and friends are always surrounded by God's protection. I Walk in the park and feel like a kid again. I Write from my heart and tend to be sappy. I See beauty in so many things; in children playing, in old people living and in ornery people my age who don't know any better. I Sing all the time, even tho' I'm not sure I do it well. Ha! ha! I Can enjoy time alone, when so many others I know cannot. I Watch "LOST" every Weds. night..... I Yearn to someday find the person I was meant to share my life with. I'm still a dreamer ! I Want to live each day to it's fullest and without fears that keep me holding myself back. I Cry when I'm really angry or when I'm really touched by something emotionally. I Read sporadically but when I get into one of those binges I devour books like a fat man devours cake. I Love my friends and family more than I can possibly make anyone understand. I wonder sometimes what my future holds. I Hurt more than I let on sometimes. I Fear failure more than most. I Hope you haven't given up reading this yet. I Break through the stereotypes and try to learn about people on my own, without pre-conceived perceptions. I Eat more junk than I should. I Quit very few things. I Bathe all the time and constantly have to wash towels. I Drink way too much Dr. Pepper, but I'm absolutely addicted. I Stop and analyze relationships entirely too much, but I am getting much better about this. It's a self-protective mechanism that I should just stop. I Save special things from my kids. They are my heart. I Hug anyone who'll hug me back. You just can't get enough of those. I am old enough to know better, but still young enough to follow the temptation. I Play sports when I can. I love almost ALL sports; playing and watching. I Miss my family and friends that do not live here. I miss my great grandfather immensely all these years after his death. I Hold onto hope. I Forgive easily, but I carry the pain for a long time. I Drive faster than I should, but I LOVE it ! I Learn much better with hands-on techniques I Have the most awesome family and friends in the world. I Don't like phony or false people. I Made a promise to myself that I will never allow my self esteem to be taken by another again. I Kiss extremely well.........or so I'm told. And I LOVE kissing !!! I Believe that the good in people outweighs the bad. I Wait for the "right" person for a relationship and don't have one just to be with someone. I Need to believe in the goodness of people. I Feel blessed to have the friends in my life that I do. I Know that I am just one person, but I can make a difference in the world. I Wonder how I'm perceived by others. I am just a simple girl.

Peace of mind can only come when we change what we think . . . when we get to the end of the week and mark it even . . . when we get to the end of the day and balance the books with our friends and family . . . when we realize that give and take sometimes means giving more and taking less.

THE 12 LAWS OF KARMA THE GREAT LAW As you sow, so shall you reap. This is also known as the Law of Cause and Effect. Whatever we put out in the Universe is what comes back to us. If what we want is Happiness, Peace, Friendship, Love... Then we should BE Happy, Peaceful, Loving, a Friend. THE LAW OF CREATION Life doesn't just HAPPEN, it requires our participation. We are one with the Universe both inside and out. Whatever surrounds us gives us clues to our inner state. BE and DO yourself... what you what to have in your Life. THE LAW OF HUMILITY What you refuse to accept, will continue for you. If what we see is an enemy, or someone with a character trait that we find to be negative, then we ourselves are not focused on a higher level of existence. THE LAW OF GROWTH Wherever you go, there you are. For us to GROW in Spirit it is we who must change and not the people, places or things around us. The only given we have in our lives is OURSELVES and that is the only factor we have control over. When we change who and what we are within our heart our life changes too. THE LAW OF RESPONSIBILITY Whenever there is something wrong, there is something wrong in me. We mirror what surrounds us and what surrounds us mirrors us We must take responsibility what is in our life. THE LAW OF CONNECTION Even if something we do seems inconsequential, it is very important that it gets done as everything in the Universe is connected. Each step leads to the next step and so forth and so on. Someone must do the initial work to get a job done. Neither the first step nor the last are of greater significance They were both needed to accomplish the task. Past, Present, Future They are all connected... THE LAW OF FOCUS You can't think of two things at the same time. When our focus is on Spiritual Values it is impossible for us to have lower thoughts such as greed or anger. THE LAW OF GIVING AND HOSPITALITY If you believe something to be true, then sometime in your life you will be called upon to demonstrate that truth. Here is where we put what we SAY that we have learned into PRACTICE. THE LAW OF HERE AND NOW Looking back to examine what was, prevents us from being totally in the HERE AND NOW. Old thoughts, old patterns of behavior, old dreams... Prevent us from having new ones. THE LAW OF CHANGE History repeats itself until we learn the lessons that we need to change our path. THE LAW OF PATIENCE AND REWARD All Rewards require initial toil. Rewards of lasting value require patient and persistent toil. True Joy follows doing what we're suppose to be doing and waiting for the Reward to come in it's on time. THE LAW OF SIGNIFICANCE AND INSPIRATION You get back from something whatever you've put into it The Value of something is a direct result of the energy and intent that is put into it. Every personal contribution is also a contribution to the Whole Lack luster Contributions have no impact on the Whole or work to diminish it. Loving Contributions Life Up and Inspire the Whole

Growing up in the 80's was so BITCHIN...lol...I see the styles coming back more and more and I LOVE IT. Big hair it was always a speciality of mine(Aqua Net hair spray a hair pick and a blow dryer) in the 80's they were necessities. Of course not if you had a spike and a tail (that was usually dyed a different color then your real hair.) And most of the time the men's hair looked just as good if not better then the womens...lol... There was one hair item that I don't remember men using the Banana clips they were great. I can remember wearing so much hair spray that I would go to sleep and when I woke up my hair never moved...LMAO... But I still loved it..Washing it out was a project by itself..lol...Once you did your hair you had to find an outfit. We had Granny boots , leg warmers, pin rolled jeans( the tighter the better...not just the pin roll but the jeans themselves) acid or stone washed, shirts with tails, hyper colored clothing(If you sweat it would change color...It sounds gross now but then it was BAD TO THE BONE)...Neon colors were a big hit... We had high tops that wasn't for sports,jellies, high heels, white canvas shoes with no laces( I went through alot of those) and of course socks with dress shoes( even high heels...LOL) we had slouch socks, and fold down with lace.But no matter what socks you choose to wear that day the HAD to match your shirt. Now we can't forget to accessorize. hats,friendship pins(safety pins with beads slid on them), swatch watch, jean jackets with pins all over it or zippers, zippers, zippers everywhere... o.k. ready for the day to begin you could choose to stay home and play Atari( early 80's) Nintendo (late 80's) or go out and head to the local Arcade we played games like Pole Position, Galaga, Q-bert, Ms. Pac man, Pin Ball, and air hockey...But if you stayed home there was always the rubiks cube, pound puppies, my little ponny, or if your mom was fast enough or strong enough you had the Cabbage Patch dolls and they were LIKE OH MY GOD LIKE TOTALLY AWESOME LIKE FOR SURE.(we all got one that looked like us...lol)..Or you could be a COUCH POTATO and watch t.v. like A team, Miami Vice, Knight Rider, Silver Spoon, Who's the Boss, Family Ties, Simon & Simon, Growing Pains, and if it was Friday night and you were up late you could watch Friday Night Videos you were always tired the next morning.. watched Saturday morning Cartoons ALL MORNING...He Man, transformers, Smurfs,& rainbow brite. And if you were grounded to your room ( which posters were really big then they were everywhere) or just in one of those moods well music was the ine thing you could rely on...Cheap Trick, Poison, White Lion, Duran Duran, Cyndi Lauper, Madonna, Debbie Gibson, Beastie Boys, Ice T, Bobby Brown, Bruce Springsteen,John Cougar,Michael Jackson "Beat It" & AC/DC...we didn't have cd's it was all cassette tapes(mixed ones were the best) And the movies...Breakfast Club, Pretty in Pink, The Goonies, E.T., Gremlins, footloose, Sixteen Candles, Dirty Dancing, Ghost Busters, and Valley Girl they were the best.I love all the 80's movies.. Our President was Ronald Reagan,The space shuttle Challenger exploded, The AIDS epidemic started, Fall of the Berlin Wall(I was living in Germany at that time 1989), Post it Notes, and JUST SAY NO!!! we had slangs: BARF BAG, CHILL, DOING THE WILD THING, CAN'T TOUCH THIS, EAT MY SHORTS, EAT DIRT AND DIE, GAG ME WITH A SPOON, GNARLY, SPAZ, SCUMBAG,and SIKE,TOTALLY

Friendship Of The Souls Have you ever felt like you knew someone a long, long time ago? Another place, another time, a friendship of the souls? Two people who share a bond for reasons neither know, feeling that they were friends, a long, long time ago? Did they stumble onto each other by pure circumstance, Or was it fate and destiny that played a certain hand? Two souls intertwined, they are worlds apart,But the soul, it knows no difference, in matters of the heart.Somehow they are drawn together, fate has brought them back, Each living worlds apart, they journey separate paths. When this life is over, and a new life begins, Their souls will find each other, two souls that we call friends.

10 things I would like to accomplish before I die.So here I go: 1. Be completely debt-free. I want to have no mortgage, no car payment, no credit card balances, nothing. It just might take me croaking and my life insurance to accomplish this. 2. A vacation in Las Vegas 3. See all of my children married and happy. 4. Get back to 135 lbs..I'll settle for 140lbs It's not a vanity thing, it's a health thing. That's where I seem to feel the best. 5. Enjoy the empty nest.......my youngest is 10, so that should be in the next 8 years...... 6. Drive a 1969 Dodge Charger "General Lee" that would be wicked awesome, but just drive it.....fast.......I'd be happy. 7. Would like to see grandchildren 8. Own my dream house in the country, complete with pool, hot tub, and game room. 9. Do whatever I want, whenever I want, for one whole week. This includes sleeping late, staying up late, eating whatever whenever, you name it..... 10. Travel......Would love to visit Ireland,Scotland,Italy,Greece To who ever reads this,feel free and do the same..List your 10 things :)

Is it just me, or have the past two weeks been extremely bizarre? It seems all is odd with the world. I look at the lives of my friends and see the different struggles they've gone through in the past couple of weeks. One is facing a divorce from a husband who was too controlling. One is coming to terms with mental illness. One lost his bread-winning job, in which the bread was becoming harder to come by in the first place. Others are plagued by injury, family illness, stress, job woes, relationships and every other ailment imaginable. Me? Every day I struggle with anxiety. And I know it is something that I can either blame things on or that I can work to change. But I also know that deep down, these are characteristics that will be in me forever. The people in my life can choose to accept it or move on. I look at my life and I know that, above all, it is good. I have friends. I have a wonderful family. And life throws me punches all the time. Life throws all of us punches at one time or another. That is why we have each other. Perhaps it's just the wintry months that bring everyone down. The skies have been dreary. The snow and ice and harsh weather conditions keep us trapped in our homes for who knows how long. And the ways in which we communicate are via technological advances that remain impersonal while staying under the guise of bringing us closer. But Spring is coming. And with it is new life and new chances. There are always things to look forward to. Every day is a challenge. Right now there's a part of me that would still like to live in sadness and anxiety, but I know in my soul that I can't. I'm not even a "when life hands you lemons, make lemonade" kinda gal. My best friend says, "When life hands you a lemon, suck it." One time I saw a Shoebox Greeting card in which Maxine the old bathrobed lady said, "When life hands you lemons, tuck 'em inside your bra! Couldn't hurt. Might help." Anyway. I wrote that because I knew there were so many things in our life that totally fucking sucked. We can either dwell on them or laugh them off. I'm still dwelling on a few things. Like how AWESOME my friends feel when I say, "Can we talk? I'm scared!" Anyway. If life's been giving you a handful of crap cards lately, feel free to share here. Or not. Whatevah.

[to make your life a little better] 1. Trust Your Instincts. If it doesn't feel right, it probably isn't... fun, tempting...maybe, but not right. 2. Remember your manners. It doesn't cost you anything, but it speaks volumes about who you are. Having class starts with this. 3. Never let possessions "Own" you. It's just stuff! The most valuable things in life - friends, respect, love, knowledge-don't cost money... Hokey, but true. 4. Nature Your Friendships. The investment youe make in true friends will pay huge dividends all your life - remember, you can't make an old friend. 5. Keep your hands clean. This is meant both literally and figurtively... it will save you a lot of regrets later... 6. Believe in yourself. Yeah, this is another hokey one, but you do happen to be the only you in existence, and you're also the only person in the world who can truly hold you back in life... Think about it. 7. Be grateful. Don't waste all your todays in anticipation of some grand tomorrow. Now is all we've got. Live in it! 8. Treat others the way you want to be treated. [Okay, so I didn't make this one up.] The point is, just because you're smarter or richer or prettier than someone else doesn't mean you're better. It just mean you've been more blessed. 9. Always keep playing. Who says adults have to give up toys? Keep the little kid inside you alive... it keeps your imagination primed. Silly is good. 10. No matter what, you will always be loved. You don't have to test this one... Just carry it around in your back pocket, and know that, no matter what, you can always come home. If you can only remeber one -- Remember you are loved.

Calmness in our lives. I am passing this on to you because it definitely works, and we could all use a little more calmness in our lives. By following simple advice heard on the Dr. Phil show, you too can find inner peace. Dr. Phil proclaimed, "The way to achieve inner peace is to finish all the things you have started and have never finished." So, I looked around my house to see all the things I started and hadn't finished. Before leaving the house this morning, I finished off a bottle of Merlot, a bottle of White Zinfandel, a bottle of Kalhula, a package of Oreos, the remainder of my old Prozac prescription, the rest of the cheesecake, some Dorito's, a carton of Rocky Road icecream, and a box of chocolates. You have no idea how freaking good I feel right now. Please pass this on to those whom you think might be in need of calmness as well.

Have you ever asked yourself that question? I have asked this of myself so many times and it always makes me laugh. I have decided that I am where I should be according to my fatalistic mindset. You? It's been a rough year but I am still standing. I have much to reflect on and more to give thanks for, including my closest friends who have taught me much about myself. I have thought about the growth that has gone on this year and albeit painful, I have learned so much about myself. I think one has to realize through their "failures" that some good can come. I think for me risking leaving something that wasn't quite right but was safe was the hardest thing I've done in my lifetime. There are days when I still question if I did the right thing, does anyone ever really know what the right thing is? I just know at the end of the day, I want more for myself and want to feel that I want to give more of myself to someone. I want a genuine happiness and love surrounding me. Even though men have such a different makeup than woman, I want a man who at the end of the day shows me that I am it for him and he for me. I've never been one who has needed to be wined and dined but just simple things like someone tuning into my emotions, knowing when to put there hands on my shoulders and remind me why I live this crazy existence, and one who is going to work on keeping the spark alive by sneaking up behind me and whispering in my ear...... I think we all want love and I think communication is the key to all of it. You should be able to share everything with your partner and not feel like judgement is coming. You should be able to trust and not play games, not waste time and kick the frickin pink elephant clear outside your living room and house for that matter! So as I sit here and think where I'm at in my life right now and even though so much of my life is uncertain at the moment, I am certain of some things. I have great family support, my loves, and I have the knowledge that I can make it on my own. I am a smart woman with a good head on my shoulders and I am a fabulous mother. I will make it. I will find it. I will have it. Be thankful and live everyday better than yesterday.