Alone in a house where the only thing that becons you is the sound of your own voice in your head..Hell I woke up to the sound of my grandmothers voice and that was weird yet comforting.I think..Im not sure its pretty fucked up when ya hear a voice ya aint heard in 14 yrs. But she was so pleasant sounding and I could smell her sweet perfume hear her footsteps across the wood floor.I reached out to touch her and she was gone....God I miss her.
Forgive me father for I have sinned....
Im so messed up. I dont know anymore. I need to just drop off the face of the earth so noone can find me.
They say don't get your hopes up,
Or you'll just end up getting burned,
And yet somehow or another,
I never really learned,
I watched all I care for,
Break down before my eyes,
My dream is forever out of reach,
Despite all my tries,
Nothing is built to last,
And dreams are no exception,
They are tricks and lies,
Your mind's taunting deception,
The warm tranquility of a dream,
So soon becomes a cold sadness,
Blanketed by hurt and pain,
Driving one to utter madness,
The piercing and scorching,
Only to be accompanied by your screams,
Thus is the price I must pay,
i can't help it....
This body
this body is my prison
it knows of only pain
so many scars
from glass and
razorblades
cover this 5'7'' frame
so many nights
spent crying
after days of bingeing
swearing not to purge
not to make it worse
i know the dangers
i know the effects
curled in a ball
as i eat myself to death
i need control
curb the craving
just another slice
this body isn't worth saving
look in the mirror
stare in disgust
try not to cry
try not to break
it's all my fault
all my mistake
why can't i be normal?
just love myself?
i can't
i don't deserve it
break out a blade
release some tension
another secret shame
that i really shouldn't mention
make the barcodes
on my legs
stairways
on my thighs
catscratch in the arms
learn how to lie
the beauty of self harm
deny deny
and deny some more
each one you trick
adds to your score
blood trickles
a beautiful red stream
i am at peace
everything's so serene
the voices
they're coming back
cut some more
block them out
for a moment or more
berry colored gashes
cover gorged porceline skin
this is my daily battle
this is how deep i'm in..
Someone save me..Save me from my sin
