well i'm defintely a firm believer now that nice guys finish last, or don't get to finish at all. i mean i may not be in the best situation for some of the things i expect or desire or crave. i can live with things not going my way. but it seems the more i do, to try doing the right thing, or to put someone else first the further it puts me out of the picture. maybe i need to start being the typical ass and if i want something do whatever it takes to get it, but that so isn't me. maybe i'm just shooting too high. maybe i just need to lower my hopes, so that i don't get any expectations i shouldn't be getting. wish for once something would work out as nicely as i want it too