I'm 32, happily married to my wife, Monica,..... I work a shitty job but make decent money w/ good benifits, .......I just try to make the best of it,......But mainly I just try to have a good life!! ......................... I am my own worst enemy ,I'm not the smartest motherfucker and shit, I don't pretend to be And why I am the way I am is not a mystery My mind's not in proper working order or in therapy The brain's confused and mentally abused Life's been hanging on a string so what the fuck I got to loose? And what the fuck I got to prove to you? If you don't know me by now, you'll never know me You can put that on my real homies I got problems and they stack like bills And I relate to the broken, bleeding heart love killed And I awaited in the shadows, awake in the dark Hoping to talk to the passed on, I'm falling apart I'm such a mess and decisive, I'm fading away I'm out of touch with society and living today Never relying on my sanity, I through it away To become the maniac that's got your attention today ....Can you keep a secret?.. Well I'm afraid world because they want me to die, can you believe it? But I'm still alive... and been floating since '95 With my chin held high but I'm so dead inside Let the problems just roll and put them back into a pile Because it's just a bunch of shit that I can't deal with right now And I'm tired of always guessing and messing it up again And the next day it's even deeper and I'm steady sinking in ..... I took a look at myself and came to grips with what I found It was a vision of a child, disturbed and broke down No soul, no heart because I gave it away No time for feeling sorry, I'll grieve another day And all those tears are stored in storm clouds That hover above me and cover the ugly Continued to haunt me when I was feeling low That's the same reason I hold on and never let go .........I'm so Hidden and you're never gonna see I'm cold Forgiven all because of my beliefs I'm no Body that you ever wanna be Cause I know that the world is afraid of me