(Probably the mailman.)
A married couple went to the hospital together to have their baby delivered. Upon their arrival, the doctor said he had invented a new machine that would transfer a portion of the mother’s labor pain to the father. He asked if they were willing to try it out. They were both very much in favor of it so the doctor hooked them up to the machine. The doctor set the knobs to 10% for starters, explaining that even 10% was probably more pain than the father had ever experienced before.
But as the labor progressed, the husband felt fine so he asked the doctor to go ahead and bump it up a notch. The doctor then adjusted the machine to 20% pain transfer.
The husband was still feeling fine. The doctor checked the husband’s blood pressure and pulse and was amazed at how well he was doing. At this, they decided to try for 50%. The husband continued to feel quite well.
Since it was obviously helping out his wife considerably, he encouraged the doctor to transfer ALL the pain to himself. The wife delivered a healthy baby with virtually no pain. She and her husband were ecstatic.
However, when they got home, the mailman was lying dead on their porch.
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Tom and John were sitting in the cafeteria at lunch one Friday afternoon discussing the hot new video game that had just come out. John asked Tom if he’d gotten the game yet, that he went out and got it the minute it was released and it was awesome. Tom answered that he didn’t have enough money and his parents said he had to earn the money.
John gave Tom a suggestion on how to get money quick and easy. Tom was to go home and tell each of his parents “It’s okay. I know.” John promised him it was a sure fire method.
That evening, Tom decided to try it out on his mom first. Tom went into the kitchen where his mother was cooking dinner and told her, “Mom, I know, and it’s okay.” Mom reached for her purse and handed Tom $20. She told him, “I don’t care how you found out, just don’t tell your father.” Tom quickly left the kitchen, wondering if the plan was really working so he decided to try it on Dad.
He walked into Dad’s office and told him, “Dad, it’s okay. I know.” Dad, sat there for a minute, then quietly took his wallet out and handed Tom $20 and told him, “Son, just don’t tell your mother.”
Tom decided that John’s plan worked so well that he wanted to try it on another adult. So, the next day Tom approached the mailman and told him, “Sir, it’s okay, I know.” The mailman immediately dropped to his knees and, holding out his arms, said to Tom, “Come here my son. I have waited a long time for this day.”
