sexy minx's blog: "When the Hours Seem Long"

mistakes are made lessons are learned, new paths are paved by bridges buried if that path your head is turned the gift of failure you have earned....

Friday, November 16, 2007 Reflections Category: Writing and Poetry where i stand in life...Alot people want to know where i stand in life so here it goes...I have been through alot..i lost my husband 4 yrs.. ago he was shot I have 3 boys that are very wonderful...I lost every male in my life my dad died 6 mths after my husband was killed...So I guess I learned a lesson in life that some people never learn..To love and respect those you have because when there gone there is no turning back..I have learned honesty is the most golden thing you can do..I have alot of problems in my relationships with people like who i am until i date them then they want to try and change me..well i think there is somebody for everybody why try to change anyone..I expect very little i just ask for respect i don't even care if anyone ever loves me as long as they respect me...and honesty with loyalty...i do give it all and am not wrong for expecting it...people come and go in and out of my life some come then there gone forever..as for some I am glad for that..others it feels good when we meet up again after years of not seeing each other..i also notice that i have fallin into a trap this last relationship i was in i fell in love with the box he was handsome but the box was empty his heart was cold and he was full of hate...when i first met him he gave me a beautifil cake and shit on it...but that was the way was used to being..i have beat my face was broken and i care more about that guy then i do my ex..he hurt my emotionally..he knew what he was doing..it took me awhile to realize that not everybody is what they say they are..he was just an illusion..of something I wanted.. he prentened to be that....He fooled me and left me with hate and pain...some people come into your life they need a possitive person you offer your hand to pick them up they grab it but don't want to make the change to scared to or not ready i don't know i am sure the intentions are always good...friends are the ones that are there rain or shine through your highs and lows..that you call anytime they will be there..I moved out here from st.George only knew my ex he didn't want me to have friends..he broke up with me once a week so i went to work and meet alot of friends i had good friends out in st.George even in Vegas..but my friends here in cedar are my best friends i have ever had they seen me through the rough times with my ex..they stuck by me never turned there back..they are still here today..I am who I am I love to be around friends I love to laugh and I love to make people laugh..I love my 3 boys and am proud of them everyday for being survivors of life there dad and grandfather dying..my ex some of the people in our lives that use to call us friends..I have moved to many of different places and used to strip and tour dancing there are many things i have see many of things i still want to see..i want no more drama..truthful honest friends that are loyal..exceptant..and just want to hang out and have fun..that is what i want...

When we first met I tried all i could to not think about you, It was more than I could do... So i would simply walk alot to occupy my time.. But then I would end up where I started from with you back on my mind... you see you have something special that i can't quit explain.. I knew you we're dangerous before I knew your name... It wasn't my fault it happen on its own.. so now that we are together you will never be alone...

When the hours seem long and the world seems wrong, when your spirits are low and theres no inter glow, may the thoughts in here bring you laugher and cheer enlighten your days and em brighten your ways, dark shadows fall into the lives of us all but through it all we learn to grow and stand tall, the more we endure with the patience and grace, the stronger we will grow and more we can face, there is always two sides the good and the bad, the sad and the glad.. If we can but keep on believing what we know in our heart is true..The darkness will fade with the morning and this will pass on to you.. god never sends the give of winter, with out the joy of spring..Today my heart will cry for tomorrow my heart will sing... Keep Smilin... Holley Bess

I remember the stories i was told when i was small, when the princess was in trouble all she had to do was call, now that i am older i know thats not all true cause every waking moment my heart cries out to you, if you see god theres one thing you can do, tell god i would give anything for one more day with you, i would give my eyes to see you as happy as you have been, i would give my voice to tell you are my father and a friend, i would give my heart to save you cause with out you i am alone, i would give my life with out regret, if would come back home... this was wrote for my dad that died 3 yrs ago... Holley Bess

Thoughts of you bring sunny skies, when i look up at the sunny skies, i take a moment and close my eyes, as the sun beats down upon my face i smile as i picture your face, up in the clouds in the sky both of us are flying high and as we land upon a distant cloud we hear an angel speak out loud saying he was sent by god above to tell us what we have is not just love that we are amongst a very few that experience what others never do..and as that angel flies away i open my eyes to a sunny new day... Holley Bess

If time was for sale i would buy all i could for more with you would only be good, more time for you, more time for me, more time to share more fantasy, But times not for sale and it can't be bought so look in my eyes and share my thought... Keep smilin.. Holley Bess