So every guy claims to want a hot chick who cooks, cleans and is interesting. They rag on thier friends for that ugly chick they dated back in the day or laugh at him for turning into a pussy once he gets into a relationship. I've always thought the guys that were hoping for the epitome of the Jimmy Soul song 'Never make a pretty woman your wife' were rare, I mean how many plain, insecure, stupid women could there possibly be out there. I mean we've all seen guys check out the hot chick that walks by him and thought that was the type of girl that they all want, the really hot one that everyone else will be jealous of but I've really started wondering just how accurate that perception really is.
I've alway been proud of my appearance, thinking that being a cute brunette chick was an advantage and that my independance, fiery spirit and fun loving demeanor were things that guys appreciated however, after a few recent experiences I've started to reconsider. I'm the type of chick who laughed at Sandy in Grease, I though what a moron! You're willing to change who you are to impress some guy? Poser!! I mean we all know there are basically two types of girlfriends, the ones that your friends are drooling after and asking if she has any friends she can introduce them to and the type of chicks where your friends say she seems, um, nice..... Fact of the matter is I'll never be that second type of chick but what do guys really want?
Do they really want the chick that is hot, fun and fucking cool? A chick like me who watches football and would rather die than engage in an hour long talk about 'my feelings', a chick who draws attention without trying, who doesn't care what anyone thinks and prefers to live by her own set of rules? Or are they really searching for a chick who owns alot of pink clothes, watches One Tree Hill and uses round about ways of guilt tripping them into giving up any hint of a social life? The chick who will happily be obedient and emotional, the ones who will do their laundry, cook their dinner while singing Hopeless Devoted To You and say I love you ten times prior to hanging up the phone each and everytime?
This same train of thought carries over into sex, as well. You've all heard (or overheard) a story or ten about the girlfriend who just lays there in bed, the one who refuses to give blow jobs or the one who denies her boyfriend sex after the first few months of their relationship, right? Those are the same chicks who hit their boyfriend in the arm or call them a pig for checking out the hot chick that just walked by, who ask the dreaded 'is she prettier than me?' question and who trip out when they stumble across their boyfriends stash of porn. No guy is sitting in the bathroom jerking off to Home and Garden Magazine because Suzie Homemaker looks like a really nice person (!) but when all is said and done can they really separate love and sex? How many guys realize that they can have it all, not just one or the other? How many married men carry on affairs for years with that hot chick while remaining married to Suzie Homemaker? Although I can't give you a statistical figure, I can guarantee you there are plenty of them!
I pride myself in not needing anyone, if someone is a part of my life it's because I want them to be, need indicates obligation and lack of choice so where's the satisfaction in having nothing more than a mock sense of security and a relationship that offers nothing more than comfort? To me that's pathetic, but the more I look the more I find that it's not so rare. Everyone wants a guarantee they won't get hurt, rejected or otherwise screwed over, but regardless of who you involve yourself with, there's always a risk involved and to me if you're going to take a risk, you should at least be able to find true happiness, even if it's only briefly. And yet I continually see people involved in relationships that offer, at best, half ass happiness and sorry ass attempts at self preservation. So is it really that risky to take a chance on a chick that you can't control? Isn't true love giving some one the power to break your heart but trusting them not to?
Do guys really prefer relationships that help them grow as people? Involvements that are risky but may provide more in a few short months than the safe ones can provide in a lifetime? Or are they so concerned with guarding thier heart and ego that they prefer to ensure their emotional safety? I want a guy, that can be an equal, an animal in bed and a confidant, a friend and a lover, who can teach me and learn from me. I want to know he's with me because he wants to be, not because I make him feel safe and secure or he thinks he can't do any better. I guess I want it all and until recently I thought everyone else did too. Maybe I'm wrong and maybe I'll spend eternity alone because I refuse to conform or settle for what I can get but at the end of the night, I know I won't be lying in bed next to some one wondering what if, with a mind full of unexplored dreams and a heart full of regrets.
