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well days go by...people walk and they drive...never thinking about the path they run every day. but lets look for a minute. do we live life to just settle? some do... some push harder and harder for what they want. but then...you get a very small crowd in this world..rebels as you might say. there world doesnt know love or bein safe. they live in a dark world when they are alone. some love this and some grow to hate it. for the ones that hate it dont fear...you can escape if you let yourself. now to the ones that fall in love with this darkness. this darkness is the hatred for society and societys rules. we live our life knowing that love we push for will prolly never be there. we know that dreams are just dreams and reality is what we deal with. myself in my world i live sitting on the street watching people walk by. no one ever notices me or even bothers to. i live in this world knowing i may die here but if it saves pain of me or others...then death alone in a dark shadow will always be worth it because its the people willing to fight wrong and society...that makes this world turn.
well been awhile but needed to unload. you know i salute every soldier who fights for our freedom. I mean risking there lives day in day out to protect us. but i wanna talk about another kind of warrior. another type of soldier. i sit and look at this world and realize the soldier and warrior i have become. ive foughten off my demons and surrendered to some. but in the end i fight harder and harder. i fight the will and urge to live. i fight the will and urge to end everything. when i see a paradise of freedom its not the beautiful blue waterfall pouring down. its a waterfall of blood symbolizing the pain and torture i live through every day. many people feel this same fight.the fight to keep will ond faith in this world where faith...is something idont think is real. hope is a let down, a heartbreaker. we all fight our own battles no matter how big or how small. its the drema of sitting on the side of the street...waitin....watching everyone go on with there lives...never worrying about the person smaller than them....never worrying bout the person who has nothing of what they have. Have we become so blind as to see past looks and see the good in a person. i guess so. well i for one know that heart break will never disappear it will always follow and soon the only freedom i realize any of us hreat broken warriors will have in the end.....is death. the love we have is never enough. the care we have is too much. maybe we aint the hottest or the biggest or baddest, but i tell you this...i fight harder and endlessly every day so to you that dont know the feeling some of us feel every day...consider yourselves lucky....lucky that you never have to live the nightmare....of the demon fighting warrior whos heart is shattered beyond...what life can fix anymore.
lol well here i am once again...alone...destroyed. I sit and wonder how i can find whati thought be the best girl ever...and her turn out to be the worst. How sad is it to actually come bragging to someoen you say you love about cheating one them lol. Please aint nuthing but a joke game she played. But is this fer real? I lay down again and fall into a deep sleep. There i am again on the side walk sitting down knees up hood up and my head laying on my knees. I look up at the sky and all aroudn me...no one there. I can see myself sitting there and the blood rolling down my face replacing my tears. Only so much heartbreak and pain one person can go through. the tears have turned to blood. TTheheartbreak happened enough that i fill up with pain and heartache and it spills. I look at the torture and pain. I see the many ways to end all existance and i watch myself go through each one. lol and whats funny people ave no remorse for causing this pain. oh but they do have a nice thingto say about it...not there fault. wow not there fault lol thats funny shit. and even funnier is when they hurt you they make up ome bullshit about how you hurt them just as much...becauseyou were upset and hated n ot bein able to see them...gimme a fuckin break. all i know anymore is..fuck the world and life...sick of the games and love is a fake ass game thats not true! so to all you haters and bitches! put that in your pipe and smoke it
