I've come to realize that I will probably need a harem of men to fulfill all the roles in my life. Because can one man really be the end-all everything? Is there one perfect person to be my all? I'm not so sure anymore. So maybe I should stop searching...
The Boyfriend.
He is the new hope. Every time a new relationship pops up- it would allow me the hope that "this is it! I'm done searching". Falling in love is exciting and brings out the best in everyone. There's so much to learn from each other, so much to explore. He'd provide the perfect setting for a normal relationship- good sex, good chemistry, good adventures... and he'd bring with him the drama that breaks a hopeful heart.
The Husband.
He's a constant. But he'd be little more than a room mate on the rare occasions that he was actually under the same roof. There would be no sex. Instead it would be a partnership based on parenthood and business. But he would offer security and stability.
The Ex Lover.
Sex with him would no-doubt be earth shattering. He'd know my body and my sexual preferences, having once been the boyfriend, but there would be no strings attached and no drama. With him there's no comparison for an amazing orgasm. Good for working off that relationship tension of every day life and normal sex.
The Best Friend.
He's the adorable, sweet, understanding guy who is a shoulder to cry on and the strength behind every uncertain door. My loyalty to him would be unwavering. I'd love him. I'd tell him all my secrets- because I know he'd never judge me. But there would be no sex, and little chemistry. He offers the smiles, the tears... and would be with me through every misguided relationship.
The Fillers.
Some women call them the "Serves"... as in Reserves. These are the handy men who come take out the trash, who hang out when you have no company, who are the quick date to your cousin's wedding, who search your yard for that scary sound in the middle of the night. There may be some sex involved, but it's usually a form of payment for services rendered... or just a cure for boredom. I probably wouldn't even know his last name, or where he worked. But that's not important to the dynamics of this relationship anyway.
The Soul Mate.
He would be my Utopia. My Zen. The twin of my soul. God would have created him with the same breath he created me. I would know his thoughts, his feelings from thousands of miles away- even without talking to him. He would call me in the middle of the night to ask why I was crying- without me ever telling him there was anything wrong. We'd be connected at a spiritual level unlike anything ever seen in the entire world. He would be perfect for me. And I wouldn't be able to have him ... god would create him just for me, and we would have shared past lives- but we'd be separated without hope of every being next to each other. It would be our tragedy.
...........and so my lonely existence would continue....... but I'd still have hope.
For one.
